Salty Pockets

Signs of the Second Coming

2011-09-14T23:20:00.000-06:00

The act of looking for a sign is an interesting thing, particularly the signs of when Jesus Christ will come again in glory. On one hand, the Savior warned against an adulterous generation who seeks for a sign. (Matthew 16:4) On the other, the Lord also commanded His disciples to watch for the signs of His coming. (Matthew 24:42) This comparison is worth pondering when studying the topic of the Second Coming. A more specific question to ask is, “Am I looking for signs as proof or for hope?” I think intent will determine whether the topic is sensational or spiritual.

In preparation for stake conference this weekend, I have been thinking of some scriptures that pertain to the signs of the Second Coming. I am listing them here as a reference, not as a talk or a message, but a compilation of topics grouped by specific signs. For someone who may not be familiar with the signs recorded in the scriptures, this list will provide an overview of these events.

I have listed some of the scriptural references pertaining to these signs in five categories. “Long before” refers to events that were to take place long before the Lord’s coming. “Sometime before” refers to events that will precede the Second Coming but do not have a specific timeframe. “Just before” refers to events that the scriptures say will occur just before His Coming. “After” refers to events that will take place following His coming and “Near the end” lists some signs that are often included with the signs of the times but will pertain to the end of the Millennium.

No effort has been made to predict the order of these latter-day events except to follow the order in which these scriptural references appear in their respective accounts. This summary does group each of the scriptural accounts with like scriptures that relate to the sign being described. Thus, each of the bolded words or phrases refer to a specific or related sign of the time. This list does not contain all signs of the Second Coming, but does group those found in Daniel 7, Joseph Smith Matthew, and sections 29, 45, 88, 116, and 133 of the Doctrine & Covenants.

Lastly, there are some notes I have made for my own use which are typed in blue. This includes questions I have pondered and notes that help to understand how some of the signs relate to others.

If you have read this far, perhaps it is because you have some interest in understanding the signs of the second coming. I hope this list of scriptural references is helpful in your own personal study.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Long before

Apostasy
False Christs. Many will say that they are Christ and will deceive many.
JSM 1:6

The apostles will be hated and killed.
JSM 1:7

Many will be offended, and will hate and betray one another.
JSM 1:8

False prophets will arise.
JSM 1:9

The love of many will wax cold.
JSM 1:10

Abomination of Desolation
Stand in the holy place when you see the abomination of desolation
JSM 1:12

Temple, and Jerusalem to be destroyed
D&C 45:18-20
JSM 1:3

Judah will flee to the mountains.
JSM 1:13-17

Great tribulation on the Jews, which are the beginning of their sorrows.
JSM 1:18-19

Hastening
Those days will be shortened for the elects sake.
JSM 1:20

Scattering of Israel
Israel will be scattered among all nations
D&C 45:19, 24

Sometime before

Continued apostasy
Again, false Christs and false prophets will arise showing great signs and wonders to deceive the elect. He will not be in the desert or secret places.
JSM 1:22, 25

Hastening
The Lord will hasten His work
D&C 88:73 (this is a prophecy for the last days)

Wars and commotion
In the times of the Gentiles there will be wars and rumors of wars, the earth will be in commotion, men’s hearts will fail them, they will say that God delays His coming. The love of men shall wax cold. Fear will come upon all people.
D&C 45:26-27
D&C 88:91
JSM 1:23, 28-29, 30

In spite of earthquakes and desolations, men will take up the sword and kill one another.
D&C 45:33

Preaching of the gospel
Angels (first mention) will fly in the midst of heaven to prepare the people for the coming of the Lord.
D&C 88:92
D&C 133:17

Angel flying in the midst of heaven having the everlasting gospel will appear unto many.
D&C 133:36

The gospel will be preached unto every nation, kindred, tongue, and people.
D&C 133:37
JSM 1:31

The servants of God will say: Fear God, and give glory to Him, for the hour of His judgment is come. Worship Him.
D&C 133:38-39

In the times of the Gentiles the gospel will be taken to those who sit in darkness. Many will not receive it because of the precepts of men.
D&C 45:28-29

In this generation the times of the Gentiles will be fulfilled
D&C 45:30

Parable of the fig tree – when the light begins to break forth, summer is nigh at hand.
D&C 45:36-38
JSM 1:38

Gathering of Israel
The elect will be gathered like eagles to the carcass from the four quarters of the earth.
JSM 1:27

Restoration of scattered Israel
D&C 45:17

Remnant will remain scattered until the times of the Gentiles is fulfilled
D&C 45:25

The remnant will be gathered to their place
D&C 45:43

Watching for signs
Those that fear the Lord will look for the great day of the Lord to come, even the signs of His coming.
D&C 45:39

Those who don’t watch for the signs will be cut off.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:44

The servants of God will pray that He will come down and rend the heavens, and cause the mountains to flow down. Their prayer will be answered.
D&C 133:40-41

The Lord has prepared great things for those who wait for Him.
D&C 133:45

Watch, for you know not the day nor the hour that the Lord will come. Be ready.
JSM 1:40, 46, 48

Signs and wonders
There will be signs and wonders in heaven and on earth.
D&C 45:40

Blood, fire, and vapors of smoke.
D&C 45:40-41
(See also “signs in heaven” below)

Famines
There shall be famines.
JSM 1:29

Scourge
A desolation sickness will cover the land.
D&C 45:31

Pestilences
JSM 1:29

Holy Places
Disciples will stand in holy places.
D&C 45:32

Curses
The wicked will curse God and die.
D&C 45:32

Earthquakes and desolations
There will be earthquakes and many desolations in diverse places.
D&C 45:33
D&C 88:87-89
D&C 133:40
JSM 1:29

Testimony of thunder, lightning, tempests, and waves that heave themselves beyond their bounds
D&C 88:90

Zion, The New Jerusalem
The Lord will stand upon Mount Zion, the New Jerusalem with 144,000 with the name of the Father written on their foreheads.
D&C 133:18
D&C 84:2

The New Jerusalem will be a land of peace, a city of refuge, and a place of safety.
D&C 45:66

The wicked will not come to Zion because of the glory and terror of the Lord which will be upon it.
D&C 45:67, 70

Those among the wicked who don’t want to fight will need to flee to Zion.
D&C 45:68

Righteous people from every nation will be gathered there.
D&C 45:68, 71

Those among the Gentiles are to flee to Zion.
D&C 133:12

The Lord will utter His voice out of Zion. (When?)
D&C 133:21

Return of the city of Enoch (Not sure if this will be before, at, or after.)
D&C 45:11-14

Jerusalem
Those among the Jews are to flee to Jerusalem, and the mountains of the Lord’s house. (Is this referring to the Mount of Olives rather than the temple?)
D&C 133:13

The Lord will speak from Jerusalem. (When?)
D&C 133:21

Ocean and Islands
The Lord to stand upon the ocean and the islands.
D&C 133:20

Land returns
Voice of many waters and thunder will break down the mountains. The valleys shall not be found.
D&C 133:22

The lands of Jerusalem and Zion will be returned to their own place as it was before it was divided.
D&C 133:22

Water returns
The great deep will be driven back into the north countries. The islands will become one land.
D&C 133:23

Gathering at Adam-ondi-Ahman
Adam, the Ancient of Days, meets at Adam-ondi-Ahman. 1 million minister to him. 100 million stand before him. The Son of Man comes and is given dominion, glory, and a kingdom that all people will serve Him.
Daniel 7:9-14
D&C 116:1

Hailstorm
Great hailstorm that will destroy the crops of the earth. (Before or after the famine?)
D&C 29:16

Vengeance
Vengeance on the wicked. Flies and maggots will devour their flesh. Tongues shall be stayed. Flesh will fall off their bones, and eyes from their sockets. Beasts and fowls will devour them. (Why won’t the beasts and fowls be affected? Or will they?)
D&C 29:16-20

Just before

Abomination of desolation
Daniel’s vision of the abomination of desolation will again be fulfilled.
JSM 1:32

Mount of Olives
Jesus will stand on the Mount of Olives and it will cleave in two creating a great valley.
D&C 45:48
D&C 133:20
Zech 14:4-7

Jews will ask about the tokens in Jesus’ hands and feet. They will know Jesus is the Son of God and will weep.
D&C 45:51-53

Signs in heaven
Immediately after angels (first mention in D&C 88) fly through the midst of heaven to prepare the way, a great sign will appear in heaven, and all people will see it together.
D&C 88:93

Another angel (second mention, “first trump?”) will sound his trump regarding the mother of abominations, the great and abominable church, and all nations will hear it.
D&C 88:94

There will be silence in heaven for half an hour.
D&C 88:95

Immediately after, the curtain of heaven will be unfolded as a scroll. The face of the Lord shall be unveiled. (I’m not certain as to when the other signs in heaven will occur, whether before or after.)
D&C 88:95

Sun darkened, moon turned to blood, stars will fall, greater signs
D&C 29:14
D&C 45:42
D&C 88:87
D&C 133:49
JSM 1:33

The heavens will shake
D&C 45:48
JSM 1:33
(See also “signs and wonders” above)

The Lord Appears
The Lord will reveal Himself in the clouds with the hosts of heaven.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:44

The Lord will come in power and glory.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:16
JSM 1:36

As the light of the morning comes out of the east, so shall the coming of the Son of Man be.
JSM 1:26

Judgment of the righteous
The Twelve in Jerusalem will Judge the House of Israel.
D&C 29:12

Resurrection
Righteous dead will be resurrected, trump will sound (second mention, “first trump?”), earth will quake.
D&C 29:13
D&C 88:98
D&C 133:56

The heathen nations who knew no law will be resurrected
D&C 45:54

Meeting in the cloud
Two will be in the field, or the mill, and one will be taken.
JSM 1:44-45

The Lord will meet those who rejoice and work righteousness and remember Him.
D&C 133:44

The saints who are alive will be quickened and caught up to meet the Lord in the cloud.
D&C 88:96

The saints who have slept will meet the Lord in the cloud.
D&C 45:45
D&C 88:97

The parable of the ten virgins will be fulfilled. Those who are wise will not be cast into the fire.
D&C 45:56

Voice of the Lord
The Lord will utter his voice, and the ends of the earth shall hear it.
D&C 45:49

Second Trump: Redemption from spirit prison
Another angel (third mention, “second trump”) will sound. Those who accepted the gospel in the spirit world will be resurrected
D&C 88:99

Vengeance
The adversaries of the Lord will tremble at His presence when He does terrible things that they aren’t looking for.
D&C 133:42

The arm of the Lord will fall upon all nations.
D&C 45:47

The Lord will make bare His holy arm in the eyes of all the nations.
D&C 133:42

The Lord will come down in garments dyed red.
D&C 133:46-48

Wicked will burn
The presence of the Lord will be as a melting fire that burns and causes waters to boil.
D&C 133:3

Wicked will be burned as stubble that wickedness will not be on the earth
D&C 29:9
D&C 45:50
D&C 133:64
Malachi 4:1

The great and abominable church will be cast down by fire.
D&C 29:21

Third Trump: Those who will remain in spirit prison
Another angel (fourth mention, “third trump”) will sound. Those in spirit prison who are condemned will remain the thousand years are ended.
D&C 88:100-101

Fourth Trump: Sons of perdition
Another angel (fifth mention, “fourth trump”) will sound. There are those among those who will remain in the spirit prison those who will remain filthy still (sons of perdition)
D&C 88:102

Fifth Trump: The hour of judgment has come
Another angel (sixth mention, “fifth trump”) will sound. All people, in heaven, in earth, and under the earth shall hear: Fear God, and give glory to him who sitteth upon the throne, forever and ever; for the hour of his judgment has come.
D&C 88:103-104

Sixth Trump: She is fallen
Another angel (seventh mention, “sixth trump”) will sound. The whore of all the earth is fallen.
D&C 88:105

Seventh Trump: It is finished
Another angel, Michael the archangel, (eighth mention, “seventh trump”) will sound. The Lamb of God hath overcome and trodden the wine-press alone
D&C 88:106

The angels will be crowned with the glory. The saints shall be filled with His Glory, receive their inheritance, and be made equal with the Lamb in power, might, and dominion.
D&C 76:95
D&C 88:107

Repeated Trumps: Revealing the secret acts of men, Satan is bound
The first angel will sound his trump again, revealing the secret acts of men and the mighty works of God in the first thousand years. Each of the other angels will do the same making known these things for each thousand years until the seventh.
D&C 88:108-109

The seventh angel will sound his trump and will swear that there is time no longer, and Satan will be not be loosed for a thousand years.
D&C 88:110

After

Satan will be bound
Satan will have no place in the hearts of men.
D&C 45:55

The earth will be an inheritance
Those who were wise, like the five virgins, will multiply and their children will grow up without sin.
D&C 45:58

The Lord will reign
The Lord will dwell with men on earth a thousand years.
D&C 29:11

The Lord will be in the midst of the righteous. He will be their king and their lawgiver.
D&C 45:59

The Lord will stand in the midst of His people and will reign over all flesh.
D&C 133:25

The return of the Lost Tribes of Israel
(Not sure if this is before or after the second coming. It comes after D&C 133:25 which is commonly associated with the millennial reign. The references are placed here as a placeholder.)

Those in the north countries will come in remembrance of the Lord.
D&C 133:26

The prophets of the Lost Tribes will hear the Lords voice and will no longer stay themselves.
D&C 133:26

They will smite the rocks and the ice and it will flow down at their presence. A highway shall be cast up in the great deep.
D&C 133:26-27

Their enemies will be a prey to them.
D&C 133:28

There will be pools of water in barren deserts.
D&C 133:29

The Lost Tribes will bring their rich treasures to Ephraim.
D&C 133:30

The everlasting hills will tremble at their presence.
D&C 133:31

They will be crowned with glory by Ephraim in Zion.
D&C 133:32

Judah will be sanctified
Judah will be sanctified after their pain so that they can dwell in the presence of God.
D&C 133:35

Near the End

Wickedness returns
When the thousand years are ended, men will begin to deny God.
D&C 29:22

A little season
The earth is spared for a little season
D&C 29:22

Satan will be loosed for a little season to gather his armies.
D&C 88:111

The Battle of the Great God
Michael will gather his armies, even the hosts of heaven.
D&C 88:112

The devil will gather his armies, even the hosts of hell to come up to battle with Michael and his armies.
D&C 88:113

Then cometh the battle of the great God, the devil and his armies will be cast away. Michael will overcome him.
D&C 88:114-115

The resurrection
Before the end, Michael will sound his trump and the righteous will be resurrected.
D&C 29:22

The end
Heaven and earth shall be consumed and pass away. A new heaven and a new earth.
D&C 29:22

The beginning
The earth abideth the laws of the celestial kingdom and will be quickened after it passes away, and the righteous will inherit it.
D&C 88:25-26

Women in My Life

2011-05-08T16:10:00.000-06:00

This morning I am replaying a particular memory that took place in my backyard when I was about five. It was a sunny afternoon and I was standing next to my Mom for a picture. I remember very little except for the fact that the sun was in my eyes. We stood next to our painted redwood fence where there was a rose bush with little yellow flowers. With my arm around her, I asked her if she would marry me when she was finished being married to Dad. I don’t think I really understood the concept of marriage at that age, but I knew she loved me and I loved her back. My Mom was the first person to teach me about love. She has never stopped teaching, and I’ve never stopped loving her.

Jo Ann Jaurigue is another woman who has shown me a lot of love. I was a missionary in Fresno, California, and she was taking the discussions to learn more about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. She had actually met with quite a few missionaries and already knew a lot about the Church. I don’t know all the reasons, but it was while I was there that she found her testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel. There was a special connection between us, one of familiarity that hasn’t gone away. She and her daughter, and since then her grandchildren, have been baptized and have found a greater happiness in life. She has never stopped expressing her gratitude to me for sharing something with her family. I am very thankful for her and love her very much.

My wife, Liz, and I have been married for almost seventeen years now. It wasn’t long after we were married that she became the Mother of our little family. She has literally poured her life into me and our children. She is constantly drawing from a well of spirituality so that she can give more to those she loves. I don’t know how she manages to do it, but she gives and gives and gives, and her well doesn’t seem to run out. Her love is beautiful to me. I have learned more about love from her than any other person in this world, and I have known some people who are capable of immense love. It is such a treasured blessing for me to know that we have a marriage that has been designed to not only last, but grow forever. The sealing ordinances of the Holy Temple are a tremendous comfort in our marriage. It is a blessing I would wish for every marriage.

Several years ago, my wife’s grandmother, Cecile Smith, passed away. Grandma Cec was dear to me. She loved me like I was one of her own, and I am thrilled to have her claim me. Not long before she passed away, I visited her in her home. She couldn’t speak. She was barely conscious. I didn’t feel the need to say anything to her. Instead I took her hand and held it as we stared into each other’s eyes. It was such a beautiful moment as I felt her love for me. Again I felt a feeling of familiarity that seemed to extend into eternity. I miss her very, very much. Occasionally I will feel that feeling again, and I wonder. Whether she is near or not, she remains very close in my heart.

Kerstin Koldewyn is a close friend who often seems more like a fraternal twin. She gets me. While we have our differences of opinion, I find that we often think like mirror images. The nice thing for me is that she is also honest, direct, and even blunt. She is not afraid to speak her mind, even when she knows I will likely disagree. This is a wonderful gift. Kerstin helps me to challenge my own opinions, and consider other points of view. In a kind way, she has helped me to see my weaknesses more clearly so I can change. She has taught me a lot about trust and what it means to be a true friend in every sense of the word. I am grateful for her selfless gift.

From the time when I was five years old, I can’t ever remember an occasion when Fay Evans didn’t have an extra supply of smiles for me. She has been a lifelong friend who has always been interested, has always been encouraging, and has always been my example. Though now a widow, she seems to have as much energy and enthusiasm for life as she has ever had. Whether it was taking me and a bunch of cub scouts fishing at Camp Tracy, or recently giving service together in a small senior living community, she has long been a source of faith and testimony.

As I think about the many, many good women in my life, I am grateful to God for the way they have each blessed me. My forgoing list is short, but there are numerous others including sisters, nieces, cousins, aunts, family by marriage, friends, neighbors, and other acquaintances, that have profoundly affected my life for good. Women have unique and wonderful gifts that have blessed all mankind, not the least of which is the gift of Motherhood. To each of you wonderful women who demonstrate love, compassion, and charity, I wish you the happiest of Mother's Days. May God bless you for sharing your gifts!

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Why I Believe

2011-04-24T18:24:00.001-06:00

This morning, my thoughts are turned to what I consider the singularly most significant morning of my life. I was not there, but I believe. More than that, I feel. In my mind I see brief moments where a supposed gardener spoke to a woman who was crying. Mary Magdalene was beyond sorrowful, first at the death of Jesus, and secondly, because His body which she had prepared for burial had been taken. It took only one word to renew her hope. Mary. The Lord spoke her name in a very personal way, and she recognized the Master.

I realize that she and I share something in common. Both of us believed in something that we did not see with our eyes, yet heard and then felt in our hearts. This prescribed pattern for most believers is the same, to trust in things that we cannot see but hope are true – things that we feel.

Before Jesus offered his life as a ransom in Gethsemane and at Golgotha, he told his apostles, “These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you. But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you. Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. (John 14:25-27)

Pondering on the magnitude of the Savior’s sacrifice and the miracle of His glorious resurrection, I am filled with gratitude that He would offer such wonderful gifts to a soul so rebellious and proud as mine. Because He triumphed over the effects of sin and death, I can too. Through His holy name, I can believe, become clean, and live in His presence again. I can be there with family, friends, and loved ones because this gift is offered to all who will believe.

I may not hear the Lord’s voice as clearly as did Mary, but I can still hear His voice call my name when I listen to the voice of His Holy Spirit. When I pay attention to the peace and comforting feeling that attends all truth, the Holy Ghost brings special feelings to my remembrance. It is then that I remember how it feels to be called by the voice of the Master. In a very personal way, I can recognize His invitation to follow Him and have the assurance that it is right.

Had I been at the empty tomb with Mary, and seen the angels who were present, I may not have believed any more than she. Yet as I learn to recognize the promptings of the Holy Ghost, my revelation is as clear as hers. The Master lives, for He is risen. Because of that glorious morning, there will be an eternity of beautiful mornings. Each morning we may hear His voice, if we will but pause to listen and then recognize the Master.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Grumpalicious

2011-04-17T22:05:00.000-06:00

I sometimes wonder if being grumpy is a technique that gets easier with age. Is it just practice that makes perfect, or does too much familiarity with life make it easier to complain to customer service? Either way I had another grumpy moment this week that I’m not proud of, and I’m going to chalk it up to age. Next, I’m going to figure it out and see if I can make myself a little younger by decreasing my grump proficiency.

My wife and I had just left a particular art gallery on Friday night, when I asked her, “Are you thirsty?” I was thinking large fruit smoothie. I could tell that she, on the other hand, was thinking, “We just spent our month’s date budget on eating out tonight. I’m not sure I want to spend more on a splurge.” She responded that she was thirsty, but water would do. Without verbalizing anything, even to myself, my mood changed. For the moment, being grumpy seemed about as delicious as the smoothie.

Grumpalicious is a term a friend of mine coined years ago as a nick-name for one of her younger brothers. It is a term that seems to describe very well one who is grumpy and is happy being so. On occasion, I have become aware that I have a grownup way of pouting when I don’t get what I want. Am I spoiled? I hope not. But perhaps I have more in common with my young children in that regard. Having said that, I am waiting for the predictable one-liner, “Well, I wonder where they get that from?” followed by a parenthetical wink and text message emoticon.

I don’t think my attitude is what the Savior had in mind when He taught his disciples, “Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:3) His conversion, I believe, refers to the other half of the equation. I’ve noticed that my kids don’t harbor bad feelings for very long. In fact, an ice cream frosty or some other treat can fix most ill feelings. While we may have pouting in common, in whatever form we choose, I have to ask, “How am I doing in the other half of the comparison. Am I quick to turn my heart toward or away? Is the turn of my heart conditional?”

Moments later I said to my wife, “Liz, I’m not sure I like the new me. I tend to get grumpier easier than I used to.” As you can imagine, that led to a discussion on the subject of me for the next little while. I apologized and we moved on. I regret to say, however, that the turn of my heart took about 20 minutes. Can you imagine if you had to make a U-turn in your car on any given street that would take that long? If you saw another driver exerting that much effort, wouldn’t you question whether or not they actually knew how to drive? So when I am driving my own emotions, I wonder why it is so hard to steer. Hmmm. I think it’s time to review my driver’s manual.

It’s not that every circumstance to which I am inclined to be grumpy is that simple. Life is most often complicated. Complications are connected to expectations, exasperations, and other complicated words that end in t-i-o-n. Some of those “tions” are worth shunning. The simplest thing for me to remember is that I am in control, and if I am not in control of my emotions, I am at least responsible. I can choose how I react to any given circumstance.

One thing I remember pondering as I reviewed my personal driver’s manual is how I choose to define my choice. It’s not just what, it’s who. My choice was not just about a fruit smoothie, it was about my wife and how I feel about her. I had to ask myself, “Is the smoothie more important than my wife? Am I really going to place my feelings in front of hers, over a smoothie?” Suddenly I seemed, to myself, very small. My mistake was pretty small, too, but I had to fix it. I felt like I was groping my hands around a steering wheel where the power steering had gone out. It was all manual. I felt like I had to wrestle my feelings to the ground to make my U-turn back to my wife. See. I told you it was nothing to be proud of.

Feeling close to my wife again was a lot more delicious than being grumpy. Once I chose to consider what was really important, my difficult challenge became easier. It added power to my steering. Mind you, a good fruit smoothie has still been on my mind and I’m still thirsty, but it’s not worth being grumpalicious.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Remembering Your Gifts

2011-04-10T16:52:00.000-06:00

A few years ago, I made a very difficult decision to set aside one of my personal interests. It was a novel I hope to write. For almost a decade I felt compelled to tell a story that was constantly in my head, and I spent much of my spare time developing characters, plot and subplots, and a culture and history to go with it. The story is about a young woman in a city of merchants. In the middle of a successful venture opportunity that is offered her, she finds herself surrounded by intrigue, a national revolution, and secret combinations. I have become very familiar with this character in the past ten years. When I made the decision to put my story aside, my feelings were deep.

At the time, I felt a couple of compelling reasons why I needed to put my own interests on hold. While I had responsibilities with work and also with my church, the biggest reason was my family. I considered the amount of time that I had available to spend with my children, and I figured that most of it would be taken in order to write my story. The two interests were starting to compete. The second reason was that I felt I needed to spend more time with people. I needed to make some visits. When I considered how much happiness I felt when I would visit a friend or an acquaintance I hadn’t seen in a while, and then compared it to the frustration I felt after spending a small amount of time on my story and not get anywhere, I decided it was time.

I remember the day I put my story in boxes. I had sketches and maps that covered the wall of my study, with storylines and resource material that I had researched. At no time did my interest seem wrong. It just seemed that it wasn’t the right time. I had this feeling that was small and quiet. I felt that putting my interests aside for a time was the right thing. It reminded me a lot of when I made the decision to serve a full-time mission and I had to leave family and friends at home, and focus on serving people I had never met before. The two years passed and were incredible. Afterward, I came back and continued the important relationships in my life. They have become much better.

Since that time, my interests haven’t gone away. I find that I still have a strong desire to write, and I take some time to do it. I still love to read, and I look for little places in my schedule that I can carve out for it. I love to paint and draw. I don’t get to as much as I would like, but I still have this strong desire to do so. Each of these is a gift. They are all things that I am interested in and have some ability to do.

As I have focused on my other responsibilities, I think I forgot some of the reasons for putting my interests aside. It wasn’t because I was too busy. My biggest reason was because of my children. Recently I was reminded of my gifts and how I could better use them.

Two weeks ago I had the opportunity to watch Rose Datoc Dall paint at a Deseret Book Lunch and Learn. I have admired her work for a couple of years now, and it was great to see her in person. She is a beautiful artist. As she painted she described some of the challenges and blessings she feels as a mother. Trying to find balance is not always easy. In fact, it often doesn’t exist because our circumstances are always changing. As we shared some examples of using our gifts and talents, I mentioned that I recently hadn’t painted as much due to time constraints. Her comment was, “Why don’t you paint with your kids?” That simple suggestion got me thinking.

Initially, the reason I stopped working on my story was because it was taking time away from my family. As I thought about other interests I have, I wondered why I shouldn’t spend more time sharing those interests with them. It would give us more in common and could help all of us to grow.

This morning I have been pondering a scripture about gifts. While it is specifically about gifts of the spirit, I think it has some relevant application. The Lord, Himself, taught, “seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given … they are given for the benefit of those who love me and keep my commandments, and him that seeketh so to do; that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me….” (Doctrine & Covenants 46:8-9)

I have other friends who have provided constant encouragement and support for my talents. I am grateful for dear friends. They, with the events of the last few weeks, have given me reason to reflect on gifts that we are each given. What a blessing it is when a friend will share their gifts and talents with me. It is a privilege to do the same in return.

Perhaps the real lesson I needed to learn was not to set aside my gifts and interests, but to look for ways that they could bring me closer to those that I care about, remembering why friends and gifts are given.

The Art of Rose Datoc Dall

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Forgrudgeness

2011-04-03T13:52:00.002-06:00

I'm not much of a grduge holder, but last night I was intrigued by a story that President Thomas S. Monson told in the priesthood session of General Conference about a couple who had some serious grudges. Ouch. Whether or not that sounds like you, there are times where a grudge can seem like a really good idea. I think it is worth thinking twice.

I’m angry still!
I feel so good when I hold out.
Of all the friends that could have stung,
It’s you this had to be about.

It wasn’t much, but just enough
To make my patience crawl.
Can I pretend that things are good?
Instead I’ll nail it to the wall.

I’ll build more walls with thorny looks
And silent words that stay unthought.
“So there!” Oh, oops. Two words slipped through
To help connect the dot-to-dot.

And then I wake to see my room
With thorns and scrawls, and me alone.
Does anger really feel so good,
When peace is knocked down from its throne?

I wipe the scrawls between the dots,
And pull the thorn on which I stepped.
I see the clock and wonder at
How many hours of sting it’s kept.

It’s been too long since I have thought
About my friend and what we share.
If truth be told, I’d rather have
More friends than walls forever there.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

What Should I Do?

2011-03-27T21:23:00.001-06:00

Occasionally someone I know will ask me a general question about confessions. Often the question they want to ask is, “I have done something wrong, and I want to fix it, but do I need to talk to my bishop?” Moments like these are very personal and delicate. Admitting guilt and acknowledging our weaknesses is a difficult thing to do.

Generally, I think there is an awareness that serious transgressions require a confession. This would include deliberate offenses to another person such as intentional physical injury, sexual violations, abuse of any kind, theft, fraud, or illegal activity. Yet, if an individual’s sins are not of that magnitude, he or she may not know if confession is necessary, especially if the sin appears to involve no one else but the individual.

It is not uncommon for someone who has made a serious mistake to wonder, “How do I know if I need to talk to my bishop? What should I say? How much do I have to tell, and what will happen?” I think there are a number of people who could enjoy more peace in their lives if they knew the answers to these questions and acted on them.

The Lord, Himself, said, “Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more. By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins – behold, he will confess them and forsake them.” He also said, “I, the Lord, forgive sins, and am merciful unto those who confess their sins with humble hearts….” Doctrine & Covenants 58:42-43, 61:2)

The simplest answer of how to know if you should confess to a priesthood leader is to follow the promptings of the Holy Ghost. A baptized member of the Lord’s Church is entitled to the companionship of the Holy Ghost. That is what the Lord intends. In His role as the Comforter, the Holy Ghost can provide spiritual guidance, comfort, and peace. If you do not feel His influence, that may be the first indicator that something else is missing. If you have made personal efforts to repent and have confessed to God in prayer, but still do not feel divine help, you may want to council with a bishop to determine why.

Another instance that may suggest a need for confession is when an individual has sinned and made restitution, but does not feel forgiven. It’s as though thoughts of the sin continue to linger and weigh on the mind. A bishop can help an individual determine if there is more they need to do to be forgiven, or if they are simply being harder on themselves than the Lord. Let me share a personal example.

When I was fourteen, I made some poor choices that led to some poorer decisions. This led to a sin that I was ashamed of. In this case, I was not guilty of a serious transgression, but I no longer felt at peace in my life. What I did feel was sincere remorse and I wanted to do whatever it took to have that burden lifted. At the same time, I didn’t want to expose my weaknesses to anyone else. I prayed repeatedly for forgiveness, yet this didn’t seem enough.

Shortly after I prayed, the idea came to my mind that maybe I should talk with my bishop. I dismissed the thought, thinking my sins weren’t that serious, but the idea lingered. It had a presence in my mind that almost seemed to gently nag. I later recognized that persistent presence as the influence and companionship of the Holy Ghost, trying to guide me and answer my prayer.

Finding some courage, and feeling that confession would ease my conscience, I asked my bishop if I could meet with him. He kindly replied yes. Having since served as a bishop, myself, I can imagine how happy he was that I asked him for that opportunity. As we sat together in his office, I didn’t know what to say. I felt awkward. My situation was very uncomfortable. Feeling a need to do something, I began.

I shared with the bishop how I felt at the time, that something was still troubling me. I told him a little about what I had done, enough for him to understand what my sin was. I then explained what I had done to repent and how I still felt uncomfortable. I asked what I should do. He was very kind and understanding. He listened. I hope every bishop will listen as well as he did. My bishop then gave me some counsel. He offered some specific suggestions that would help me avoid the same mistake again. He helped me to clearly understand the impact of my decisions and he reassured me. In that instance, nothing more was needed. He thanked me for talking with him and offered his help again if I needed it.

As I left his office, I remember having an incredible feeling. The heavy burden I carried on my shoulders when I went into his office had been lifted. It was gone. I felt capable and happy. The peace I had been seeking had returned. At that moment, I felt the importance of a bishop as a Judge in Israel. I felt at peace with God, and that was truly worth any amount of discomfort to have it back.

A voluntary willingness to confess and admit one’s sins demonstrates a repentant attitude. Sometimes prayer may not be enough, simply because we need the help of others to overcome greater sins. When our faith is combined, it is much easier to accomplish difficult things. I am grateful to have learned that lesson at an early age.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Something Worth Sharing

2011-03-20T21:54:00.001-06:00

A little over seventeen years ago I sat in the Celestial Room of the Oakland Temple in California. I had just attended a worship service and was waiting to meet some friends I had not seen in a long time. I will never forget the excitement I felt as they gradually entered the quiet room. Familiar feelings accompanied familiar faces. It was a beautiful moment.

The Bacons were the real reason I was there. I met this couple and their two boys when a missionary companion and I were asked to tell them about our beliefs. We shared with them a message about the eternal nature of families and how the gospel of Jesus Christ could help them. Since the time we first met, they decided to be baptized and were confirmed members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. One year later they wanted to have their marriage sealed in the Holy Temple. I was there to see it.

That particular Saturday is very special to me. It was the last weekend of the mission I served for my church. The fact that I could attend a temple sealing for the Bacons was a crowning point. Being there in the Temple that day was truly a highlight.

In contrast to the excitement I felt for my friends, I also felt some anxiety and sadness. While I wanted to see my family again, I didn’t want to leave all the people I had come to love. I knew that I was about to be separated again for a very long time.

The next day I attended church with the congregation not far from my apartment. I continued to have mixed feelings. During the meeting I thought about the unique experiences I had had and the friends I had made. I was overwhelmed and I began to cry. My heart was full of gratitude. In that moment I felt the worth of what I had to share.

The teachings of the Savior Jesus Christ have brought me so much joy, more than anything else I have ever experienced. When these blessings are coupled with someone to share them with, they become so much greater. In that moment of sharing, I feel blessed, and the person I share with is also blessed. In a couple of short weeks it was possible for me to feel as close to a new friend as I had with someone I had known my whole life. I attribute that to the power of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Of all the experiences I have had, the events at the end of my mission are memories I will never forget. I also observed three things:

It is so rewarding to share when someone is hungry for what you have to offer, especially when what you have to share has great worth.
The presence and influence of the Holy Ghost can enhance and enrich any relationship, and very often makes it stronger and more binding.
Living your life in such a way that you can meet friends and family in the presence of God is worth any sacrifice.

My experience in the temple that day became a powerful reminder to me. When I think of my friends who gradually entered the Celestial Room of the temple, and when I remember leaving them again at the end of my mission, I can’t help but think of another meeting that I want to be worthy of. I know God lives and that He has prepared a plan that will help us to be reunited with loved ones again. I am grateful He is willing to provide help all along the way. That help is definitely something worth sharing. I’m glad I got to share it with the Bacons.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Out on a Limb

2011-03-06T21:39:00.000-07:00

I like comparisons, or rather, I like healthy comparisons. Lately I’ve been thinking about some challenges in my life and how they seem to have something in common. The “something” is a recurring theme with a lot of variations. I think I know the theme well enough now that I’m not going out on a limb to share it.

When I was a kid, I liked climbing trees. I don’t remember ever falling out of a tree, or breaking my arm, but I do remember getting stuck in a few places where I needed some help. Feeling stuck is not a comfortable place to be. I don’t have to be hanging from a branch with four fingers to dislike it. Sometimes being in a place where I don’t feel like I can move without help is hard enough. That’s where faith comes in. It is a definite part of the theme.

The feeling of being stuck has been a familiar companion to my most difficult challenges. More often than not, it seems I am presented with a riddle that has no solution. The questions I have asked myself were not hard to understand, but the answers were elusive. Here are a few of my own examples.

How will my wife and I pay off a student loan and afford to start a family? How do I tell my boss I am uncomfortable with a company decision without losing my job? How can I possibly fit time in an already busy schedule to accept a calling and serve in my church? How can I complete my deadline at work without working on the Sabbath? How can I be at an important school play for my daughter and not neglect my client? With all that is expected of me, how will I possibly get everything done?

Whatever my questions may have been, I seem to have faired alright. In spite of elusive answers, my life hasn’t come to a screeching halt, and there isn’t a single question that has stopped me from moving forward. Yet, I have a tendency to freeze up when I am afraid. I avoid the choices I don’t want to make. Regardless of what is real, the way I perceive my circumstances can make it difficult for me to make good choices, especially if I worry too much about all the “what ifs.” The fact that I have navigated each of my challenges in the past is evidence that there was a way to do it.

This pattern of getting through difficult situations points to a significant personal observation – my biggest challenge has been my fears, not my circumstances.

The most successful way I have found through my challenges is to face them, and more importantly to face them with faith. Is this easier said than done? Yes. But, having the faith to believe that there is a way is a very important step. While many of my challenges have had the appearance of being impossible, or at least very unfavorable, not one of them has stopped me. One by one, I tackled each riddle, left my comfort zone, faced my fears, and went out on a limb. Where I thought I was stuck, I became a little less so by working to find a solution. My next step has been to turn to God.

If I truly believe that “with God nothing shall be impossible,” (Luke 1:37) and I won’t be tested “above that which I can bear,” (Alma 13:28) then I should also have faith in God that He will provide a way to get through every challenge. I can have confidence that He has already provided a way for me to get unstuck. This may be through my own efforts, or it may be from someone else who isn’t clinging to a branch. In whatever the circumstance, He will provide help. "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you," is what He has promised. (Matthew 7:7)

Truer than finding a lost object in the last place you think to look, needed help often comes when you are at the end of your rope, or at the end of a branch. It comes right when you think you can’t possibly do any more. This is because you “receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.” (Ether 12:6)

God is our loving Father in Heaven. He wants us to be like Him. We become more like Him as we put our faith in Him – faith enough to do as much as we possibly can before He steps in. It’s the faith to act and face our circumstances, even when we are afraid or don’t want to. As we learn to face our fears and replace them with faith, we learn how to get unstuck faster. It happens with His help.

If you ever feel like you are being tested as much as you can possibly bear, hold on and turn to God. Don’t give up. God intends to test our faith to make us stronger. If you feel like you have to make an impossible decision, remember that help will be on its way. That’s what He has promised, and it’s worth remembering when you are stuck out on a limb.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

A Little Dose of Wisdom

2011-02-28T20:56:00.000-07:00

How long has it been since you tried to do something and, in spite your best efforts, things went the wrong way? For me, it hasn’t been very long. Deep sigh. I’ll share in hopes that you can learn from my folly. You see, I seem to have this occasional knack for arrogance without intending to. Call it over-confidence or a lack of consideration; it’s a character trait that will quickly offend if I am not watchful. This week, I wasn’t watching.

A few days ago I had a conversation with a good friend – one of my favorite people in the world to talk with. She always has beautiful insights and she is willing to challenge me, which is really helpful. It’s a blessing because I don’t think it’s good to believe everything you think, and another perspective can really help. I am more inclined to listen to criticism from a good friend who knows me well and expresses honest feelings. That kind of openness is a rare gift.

Previous to our conversation, I had shared a personal opinion that seemed to fidget in my friend’s mind. It was restless and didn’t sit well. As might be expected, the idea came up in our next conversation. After discussing what came to be a difference of opinion, my friend did the wise thing and suggested that we put the topic on hold. I missed the cue. In my eagerness to resolve the conversation, I hoped to clarify my point of view. My friend then offered a valuable question. She asked, “Do you hope I will see things your way if you keep talking about it?” Ouch. Her question was hard to hear, but it was very helpful to me. I think it will shift the way I think for the better.

Unfortunately, my disappointment continued to grow before her question sunk in. That makes me a bit arrogant and thick. Sigh again. Why is it we don’t always think clearly in moments of frustration? After we said goodbye, I had a hard time concentrating on much else. It wasn’t because we had a difference of opinion. Rather it was because I felt misunderstood. Hmmm. What else is someone who is arrogant to think? The fact is my reasons didn’t matter. My friend was right. Then something cool happened.

During my frustration, a proverb came to mind. “Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee: rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.” (Proverbs 9:8-9) At that moment, I didn’t feel very wise. Thankfully, it’s not too late to change.

My story may not be the best evidence, but I highly value differing opinions. I tend to learn more from friends who offer another perspective. In the case of my friend, I’ve noticed that when she has challenged me in the past, whether I am right or wrong, she usually sees something that I cannot. I am grateful for that insight.

In some areas I am a very slow learner. I’m afraid this is one of them. Fortunately, I think I am making progress. I now realize that my persistence didn’t match the gift of openness that I value so much. More importantly, I discovered that an honest observation can provide some good instruction. I believe it will help me to be a much better friend.

It is good to be wise. It is better yet to have friends with wisdom. How lucky I am to have such a friend.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

My Question

2011-02-20T18:31:00.001-07:00

Surprised, I stopped and noticed it –
A question – hiding behind my confidence,
The quiet voice I forgot was there,
Familiar against my silence.

This mark, I thought, had gone away –
Scolded and disciplined for loitering.
Instead it wagged its finger at me,
That question that is questioning.

Should I be worried? Is my faith weak,
I asked, If unresolved the mark remains?
If I have answered more than once,
How long until it stays away?

I took my stance before the mark
As though it were not there.
Exchanging weakness for my strength,
I lowly knelt in prayer.

Even lower did I stand
When I was answered not a word.
Was it the fault of mark or mine,
When my prayer went unheard?

With my adjusted stature,
I saw no place to hide,
Not for me, nor my question,
Beneath confidence, stature, or pride.

I resolved myself to move along
With intentions that are good,
And when my mark no longer questioned,
That’s where my answer stood.

Some answers come by gentle words
That match the quiet voice.
Yet some are found by pure resolve
And in the honest choice.

Perhaps the mark found a place
To hide until I’m weak.
It’s finger to wag, and words to wave
With tongue placed in cheek.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

How’s Your Appetite?

2011-02-13T18:37:00.002-07:00

Some things aren’t right or wrong. They simply are what we make them. My appetites, for instance, as well as my desires and passions, can give me a lot of pleasure and happiness, or they can get me into trouble. On their own they aren’t good or bad, but they are motivators. They provide a reason for me to make choices. And that, I believe, is one of the most important reasons for mortality.

From the time I was nine years old, I had very few issues with my appetite for eating, or so I thought. I enjoyed food and I ate as much as I wanted. Consequently, I was the fat little kid the other kids made fun of, and I was always the last one to be picked on a team for sports. I may not have liked being called fatso or gordo, but I learned to live with it over the next ten years of my life.

Every once in a while during my childhood, I would get sick and lose my appetite. It was usually due to a bad cold or the flu. On a number of such occasions, I remember my Mom asking me, “How’s your appetite?” She knew one of the first signs of recovery was that my appetite would come back. She was right.

These two memories frame an interesting perspective on appetites for me. On one hand, I felt like my active appetite wasn’t a problem, yet I had a hard time controlling it. On the other, the only time my hunger slowed down was when I was sick. Controlling wasn’t a problem because my appetite went away. I’ve found the healthiest place for me to be is right in the middle. Without hunger, I would lose motivation to eat. Without control, I would have no discipline and would have to live with natural consequences. Self-control allows me to enjoy my appetites.

I believe the patterns I have experienced with my appetite to eat can be applied to all of our appetites. Whether it is a desire for a simple indulgence such as a cookie for a snack or dessert, a need for sleep, or a desire for sexual intimacy, all appetites need restraint and control.

The prophet Alma counseled his son, Shiblon, to bridle his passions so that he could be filled with love. (Alma 38:12) He didn’t tell him to be ashamed of his passions, or suppress them. Alma merely cautioned him so that he could enjoy positive natural consequences.

King Benjamin taught that the natural man is an enemy to God. (Mosiah 3:19) Is that because we are inherently evil? I don’t believe so. I do believe it is in our natures to give preference to our appetites, even at the risk of offending God. We like to eat when we are hungry, and we get grumpy when we have to go without. The more I defer to my body, the louder that inner voice gets and the less restraint I have. When I yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, I feel greater spiritual strength and comfort from within. When we do the latter, we are in less danger of being “lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God.” (2 Timothy 3:4)

I have often been inspired by a principle the Lord taught Abraham about self-control. Speaking of Himself, He said, “there is nothing that the Lord thy God shall take in his heart to do but what he will do it.” (Abraham 3:17) God is the perfect example of self-control. If I wish to be like Him, then I must learn to bridle my passions, my desires, and my appetites.

Because our appetites can often be very strong, and can easily sway our decisions in the brevity of a single choice, it is not unlikely that we will make incorrect choices in the moment of hunger. Looking at our appetites ahead of time can help avoid making prejudiced decisions.

One simple question that has helped me to make better choices is this: Will my choice allow me freedom to make more choices, or will it limit my ability to choose?

Eating healthily gives me physical strength and nourishment to take care of my body. If I eat whatever I want without restraint, I personally find that I become overweight and am more inclined to indulge. This allows me less freedom to be physically active, and encourages me to eat more so that I can find some pleasure in satisfying my appetite. Repeating this behavior can lock me in to fewer choices that will help me to be happy. Simply said, I begin to consume for my lusts.

Other appetites can be much more addictive than eating food. When I begin to dedicate – and even consume – more and more of my time, talents, and personal resources to feed an appetite, I believe I am guilty of feeding my lusts, and that makes it harder to feel the spirit.

I feel strongly that we shouldn’t feel guilty for our internal motivations. They are what we make of them. Appetites are wonderful evidence that we are alive and well. The ability to control those motivations helps me to feel empowered, and even more confident that I can act for myself, and not simply be acted upon by my appetites. As long as I am able to recognize and follow the spirit, I feel much better about my choices, and my appetites.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Struggles with Guilt

2011-02-06T22:25:00.001-07:00

I was nine. My friend and I were playing at his house. We went to a part we knew was off limits. There in front of us were piles of pornographic magazines. We didn’t go there looking for them, but we were curious about why we weren’t allowed in the room. It didn’t take long to find out. I was hesitant at first, but I chose to pick one up and browse through its pages. To this day, simply mentioning the topic of pornography will retrieve a few of those images to my mind. Some parts are still very clear, unless I purposefully block them. I’ve found I am not alone.

Over the last few years, it has been my privilege to be at important crossroads for a lot of people. I have interviewed candidates who are excited to serve a full-time mission for our church. I have met with a large number of young couples who are planning to get married. Some of those marriages I have performed. I have also done a fair share of marriage counseling to help couples who have been together for a long time. Many of these moments have been beautiful.

In a large number of my interviews, I have become aware how similar my childhood experience was to other men and women. They, at a young age, were exposed to explicit images that have had a powerful affect on them. Quite often they were exposed repeatedly. Frequently, this repetition was accompanied with some form of abuse or some other violation of personal comfort. It is not uncommon for a single act taught to a child to be repeated again in their own life. It is heartbreaking to discover this kind of pain at a crossroads-moment that should be beautiful, especially if this discovery creates a speed bump or an obstacle that delays an anticipated goal such as marriage.

Considering what I know now, I feel lucky to have escaped more painful incidents at a young age – very lucky. My encounters with explicit images did not result in a habit-forming addiction to pornography, but I wasn’t immune. It is still a temptation. My early experiences awakened feelings that are both powerful and personal. Desires were aroused that made it difficult to control my thoughts and actions. Though I repented of my sins and feel forgiven, I still feel a degree of shame for my actions.

Had my exposure to images and desire been more frequent, I don’t know that I would have escaped the more malignant sins that are becoming increasingly common. I believe I would be caught in much greater torment like so many friends I know who have been affected their whole lives. Though my personal circumstances were less disastrous, I tasted enough of desire and shame to relate to someone who is struggling. I know the power of an addiction. I also understand the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and it is beautiful. It is real.

Jesus Christ is the only perfect being to live in mortality on this earth. Not only was He born into the same conditions that we all experience, He took upon Himself our sins and transgressions. He felt the weight of our sins as He paid the price of our shame and guilt. “Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows…. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities … and with his stripes we are healed. (Isaiah 53:4-5)

Before I “esteem him naught,” thinking that He can’t help me, or any of us, out of a difficult mistake, I have to remind myself that Jesus has already taken upon Himself our sins. The ransom has already been paid. The work has been done, at least the part that would otherwise seem impossible. What is left is an opportunity to have faith in Him, believing that He is mighty to save. He is waiting for me to trust Him and turn to Him in my struggles so He can help.

Knowing there are many who battle with desires, addictions, and sins that they are uncomfortable talking about – who consequently feel alone, ashamed, and afraid – I wish I could reach out and place my hand on their shoulder to say, “It’s okay. Struggle is synonymous with being human. There is hope. We can change.”

While sin is not acceptable to God, it is a condition of life we must all overcome. The size of the sin matters less than what we individually do with what we have been given. It is unfair to compare our sins with anyone else’s. As long as our conditions are not identical, and we are not the same, any comparison may be very misleading. It is always best to compare yourself with yourself, and the Savior. He can show us what we can do through faith. We will show ourselves where we have been so that we can learn from our own experience.

I want others who are struggling to not feel alone. There is hope. You shouldn’t feel shame because you think your challenges are uncommon. They likely are not. You should feel shame when you choose to do something wrong. When stimulating images affect you, you shouldn’t feel guilty for the natural desires you have. Remember, the desires are a gift from God. You should feel guilty if you give up your agency for pleasure. Being tempted is not wrong. Giving in to temptation, or choosing to put yourself in a place where you are more likely to give in to temptation, is sin.

I believe our struggles become easier with a little help. It helps to know we all have needs, and we all struggle to learn from them. We are not so alone. It helps to know that we don’t have to feel guilt for having desires, as long as we work to control them. It’s beautiful to know that God will provide us with help as often as we are willing to turn to Him. The difficulty may not go away, but He will help. If we exercise faith, He will prove that we are not alone. He wants to be invited at our important crossroads and struggles.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Welcome Secrets

2011-01-30T21:50:00.002-07:00

Tiny things I lock in my heart –
Names I have loved, anger I’ve shown,
Even a small collection of shame –
Find harbor, and safety at home.

Esteemed with my values –
Of honor, integrity, and decency,
A deep need for compassion, and love –
They sit in mixed company.

Lonely I stand while guarding my key
Feigning strength by securing the lock.
Yet wondering what happens if I worry less
Who to let in, and who to not.

To offer my heart, I must turn the key
Lay bare my wares and things that I stow,
Risking that freedom when I open the door –
Let them choose whether to stay or go.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Just Like a Pebble

2011-01-23T22:57:00.002-07:00

Standing at the edge, I found myself tempted by this irresistible urge. I had to know. I wanted to try. Purposefully, I clenched my hand, made my decision, and then threw the small stone into the water. For a moment longer, the surface of the large pond in the Uintah Mountains remained smooth as glass. Then everything changed.

Once the relatively small rock plunged into the water, there was little I could do to stop the reaction of natural consequences. From the spot where the rock hit the surface, ripples began to move through the water. I watched them surge outward, further and further, until they reached the opposite side of the pond. Upon arrival, the ripples reversed direction and mirrored the bank as they began a return trip to where the stone first fell.

Natural consequences are quite often predictable and easy to repeat. I think it interesting that consequences often carry an undesirable connotation as consistently as water carries a wave. Yet, consequences don’t have to be negative.

There have been moments in my life where I needed extra help and had nowhere to turn. Like the pond, my life was standing still, and it seemed that I was all alone. Figuratively speaking, that is when I threw my stone – I knelt in prayer and waited to see what would happen.

Faith is not a thing of little consequence. In fact, faith the size of a mustard seed has been reported to move mountains. With that kind of force, it is not possible to exercise faith without the effects of expected consequences.

Personal prayer to God is one of the simplest ways we can exercise our faith. The truth is, prayer works. Once you throw the rock, you cannot stop the consequences of that prayer any more than you can stop the ripples in the pond. God hears and answers prayers when we ask in faith. He is not limited in His ability to answer our prayers. Rather, we often limit what He can do by how much faith we put in Him.

If you are a skeptic, you might question my belief that God answers every prayer. In turn, I might reply that some ripples merely take longer to get to the other shore before making the return trip. Sometimes that distance is self imposed because we create distance through our disobedience. I also believe there are other distances that have nothing to do with our worthiness. Instead the time required to answer a prayer has more to do with each individual test of our faith. Some tests just take longer than others. God may have made Abraham wait a hundred years to give him a son, but he did answer his prayer.

In my own life, I have found personal prayer to be very powerful. Whenever I ask in faith, I can see the Lord’s hand both guiding and providing for me. Yes, things may appear very still when He wants me to see what I am capable of, but He does listen, and He does answer prayers. Every time we pray, there are natural consequences. A single prayer offered in faith may seem very small in a wide universe, but it sends a powerful message, just like a pebble in a pond.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Columbus Moments

2011-01-16T22:09:00.002-07:00

First impressions are powerful. The first thing I associate with Christopher Columbus is the idea that “the world is round.” Perhaps you would agree. Yes, he discovered America, but so did Leif Ericson, and a number of others long before. From the time that I was a boy, I remember hearing stories of Columbus proposing that he could reach Asia by sailing west. Crossing the Atlantic was a task that many Europeans didn’t know had been done. Eventually, Columbus did sail west and proved that he was right. Or was he?

The Niña, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria arrived successfully in the Western Hemisphere, but it wasn’t what Columbus thought. To his death, Columbus argued that he had arrived in Asia. Sadly he was wrong, but his efforts made future exploration possible that would prove that he had the right idea.

Imagine how disastrous the voyage of 1492 would have been for Columbus and his crew had the “New World” not been where he thought Asia should be. The fact that he was both right and wrong is intriguing and beautiful to me. It offers a certain amount of hope to face an unknown task, one where you don’t know entirely what you are doing and have to act on faith. In just such a situation, it is possible that Columbus had additional help.

The ancient American prophet, Nephi, foresaw a time when his descendants would be visited by a people from over the sea. He said, “And I looked and beheld a man among the Gentiles, who was separated from the seed of my brethren by the many waters; and I beheld the Spirit of God, that it came down and wrought upon the man; and he went forth upon the many waters, even unto the seed of my brethren, who were in the promised land.” (1 Nephi 13:12)

The prophecy does not speak of Columbus by name, but if you can consider that his role fits Nephi’s description, there is a valuable clue to receiving personal revelation. Insight may not be all-inclusive, but that doesn’t preclude it from being true. Columbus had enough truth to get him moving in the right direction.

Another American prophet, Moroni, had an insight about what we know and don’t know. He said, “I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.” (Ether 12:6)

At times when we are moved upon by the Holy Ghost to act, it may be tempting to doubt that the promptings are real just because we don’t have a full understanding of the impression. That witness may not come until we have chosen to act for ourselves. The Lord may be waiting to see what we will do when we don’t know what to do.

One of the most difficult things I experience while trying to follow the promptings of the Holy Ghost is to make sure I correctly interpret the meaning. In some cases, the meaning simply isn’t clear but I still feel like I need to act all the same. When that feeling leads me to do something good, and I follow, seldom have I ever been disappointed. Then in hindsight the lesson reveals itself. I may have mistaken a few details in my Columbus moment, but the whole picture quite often shows that I did what I needed to do, and it was enough.

Imagine the recent upturn I felt when I made my own discovery about the story of Columbus. The idea that everyone thought the earth was flat appears to be erroneous. Well, there goes my association. There is enough evidence to indicate that many scholars before Columbus believed the earth to be round. In fact, the techniques of celestial navigation were beginning to be widely used by mariners of his time. Curiously, the “flat earth” idea has been misconstrued as history for decades because of a single biography written a little over three hundred years later.

“Hmmm,” says I. While Columbus may not have been completely right in his thoughts, and while history may not be completely accurate in what happened, that doesn’t change the reality of an impression.

I suspect that I will have many more Columbus moments in my life. I may feel the spirit and not be entirely clear about what it means, but as long as I recognize a prompting of the Holy Ghost, and I act on it, I can be assured that God will lead me in the right direction. The key is to follow the impression when it comes.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Trying My Hand

2011-01-09T17:21:00.001-07:00

They were skeptics, and rightfully so. Five years ago, my wife’s brothers had stopped by for a visit and I showed them my most recent project. By the somewhat veiled expressions on their faces, I could tell that they weren’t sure what to make of it. I was confidently amused.

Downstairs, the walls of the small workroom in our house were canvassed with life-size sketches and photographs. A table was positioned in the middle of the room to make working easier. On top sat a small sheet of particle board with a mound of clay that, to some, resembled an alien. “Hmm,” their eyes whispered sideways. “That’s really something.”

Ten hours into my work, I looked at the vague shape of clay that would eventually take me just over fifty to complete. I had never done a sculpture like this one before, and only had a vague sense of where I would go next. Whether or not I actually got there mattered less at that moment. I felt I had to try.

The process was beautiful. Each gesture of my hands made a subtle refinement. The sensory feeling of clay giving way to my fingers pulled me into the sculpture. Carefully I studied the sketches and photos of my model from every angle. I checked proportions and made adjustments. With every lift, push, and expression, the abstract form began to take life.

I savored the last ten hours of sculpting. By that point, the clay no longer looked unrecognizable. There was an excitement of getting close, of realizing my purpose. The clay had its own meaning just waiting to speak. As the detail of each feature became clearer, a stronger resemblance to its intrinsic design, I felt great satisfaction. My work didn’t have to be perfect. It was mine, and I was pleased.

Afterward, I enjoyed sitting and looking at the form in front of me. I compared two notions. While the form felt like something I had made with my own hands, it also felt like a person that I merely rescued or liberated from the clay – it was a mixture of ability and opportunity.

Quite often I like to pray over my work. I try to express gratitude for opportunities that seem to be given to me. No man is an island, and all good things come from God. I also like to pray for insight on how to improve my work and make it better. When these prayers are answered, I feel that divine guidance is added to ability and opportunity. It is a simple yet wonderful gift to be taught by impressions from God.

As for the skeptics, they really weren’t disbelieving. They just didn’t see at first. My brothers had a different understanding when they returned a week later and saw the finished product.

So often in life, the tangible evidence in front of us may not accurately describe what our work can become. More faith, please. When I believe in my own ability to act, and God’s ability to provide assistance, it’s easier to attempt things I haven’t tried before. I may not know completely what I am doing, but my faith can make up the difference.

As I shape my own life, it is very reassuring to follow a good model. Minor adjustments may not always feel good when I am the clay being sculpted. Yet when I feel I am getting closer to the true meaning of my life, those adjustments become very rewarding. That happens when I remember the purpose of why I am here. The Savior Jesus Christ is my model. Every refinement I make that increases my resemblance to Him gives me satisfaction. I feel freer as I take his image into my countenance. I look forward to when I, with Him, can look back on my life and see what we sculpted together.

What I Believe…

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Watch

2011-01-02T17:42:00.004-07:00

There is a delicious anxiety that clings to the winter holidays each year. It’s beautiful to see, unsettling when you feel it, and yet Christmas would not seem the same without it. If the feeling of waiting wasn’t worth the effort, the prelude would be torture.

Watching a young child watch a present under a tree can be quite amusing. There is so much anticipation invested in the unknown gift. While some might beg to open the present before the appointed time, others find the courage to shake the present and guess at what it contains.

Recalling a childhood memory, a friend recently told me how curiosity often bested her before Christmas morning. Unable to wait, she would secretly open her gifts, wrap them back up, and then pretend to be surprised. Though now a grandmother, there was a mischievous gleam in her eye as she confessed that this is a tradition she is still guilty of.

Waiting for company to arrive when you are expecting a visit can supplement any holiday anxiety quite nicely. As a boy, I would repeatedly go to the window to see if family or friends had come yet. Many times I would be disappointed – every time, in fact, except the last time. I’m happy to admit this is a tradition I continue to keep.

Now that I’m older, I still get deliciously anxious at the holidays. Christmas is somewhat different from when I was little, but I still find so much to look forward to.

The past few weeks have provided numerous reasons for me to think about the coming of the Lord Jesus Christ. While celebrating His miraculous birth, I have also considered what it was like for those who were watching and waiting. I think they must have felt some of that delicious anxiety after seeing the star, or hearing the voices of heralding angels.

Similarly I have pondered His second coming that believers anxiously await. Like pulling out familiar decorations from the basement, or extracting a small piece of chocolate from an advent calendar, there are preparations right now that suggest the season of His coming is getting closer. How soon? I don’t know. But I am watching.

There is a difference in seeking a sign because of disbelief and watching for signs because you do believe. Jesus himself said that those who believe will be looking for the great day of the Lord to come, even the signs of His coming. Those who are not watching will be unprepared. Those who are ready will be invited to the wedding. (Doctrine & Covenants 45:39, 44, 57)

Many of the signs of Jesus’ coming foretold in the scriptures will be accompanied by great and terrible events. Some will make men anxious, and others will most definitely be worth the wait. Beautiful promises have been made to those who are faithful. The important thing is to watch and be ready at His coming. Perhaps all the years of waiting to open presents at Christmases past will pay off. Those who have learned to enjoy the anxious waiting before a holiday may find hope in doing difficult things. As for me, I plan to keep watch at the window.

Some concentrated sources for information on the signs of his coming can be found in Mathew 24; Mark 13; Luke 17 and 21; Doctrine & Covenants 29, 45, 88, and 133; and Joseph Smith Matthew 1.

What I Believe...

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Choirs and Ribbons

2010-12-26T23:55:00.001-07:00

I don’t remember ever having a more wonderful Christmas Eve and Christmas Day than this year! Both made my personal hall of fame of memories. More than just being recent, they were meaningful and touching. Time with my wife and children was exquisite, the best ever. Christmas Eve, however, was different from any other for a few reasons. The difference was in how the day started and ended, and that seemed to set the stage for everything else.

The traditional Christmas Eve for the McConkies has always involved a full-itinerary-procession to visit the homes of various extended family. Circumstances being different this year, we found ourselves looking at a day without any of our usual plans. So instead, we welcomed some close family friends of ours into our home to exchange some gifts in the morning. What a blessing!

The first exchange was an enjoyable conversation. It was gift enough, yet other presents were given too – packages wrapped in festive paper, carefully tied with beautiful ribbon. The presents could have been anything, a tissue box for that matter, and it would have meant a lot to me. Just as much as the contents inside the wrapping, it was the ribbon that stood out. Without any words, the ribbon, the attention to detail, and the way it was tied, all seemed to say, “Thank you for being my friend.” I could tell the gift meant a lot before it was opened. It was beautiful. I was deeply grateful for the expression of the gift, as well as the gifts given without any wrappings.

That night, following a newly begun tradition of Christmas Eve dinner at home, we were visited by some guests that we hadn’t expected. I was doing my best to uphold my Dad’s long-held tradition of wrapping final presents on Christmas Eve when I was interrupted by my daughter’s observation that we had carolers. I went to the front door, preceded by my family, and watched as a crowd of friends stood around our porch singing Christmas carols to us. These were not just any voices, mind you. It was the combined voices of nearly forty Samoans singing from their hearts. If you have not heard a Polynesian choir before, you have not yet been to heaven. For a moment, I stood in heaven and began to cry. Tears streamed down my face as I looked into the eyes of my friends. There was so much warmth in their music. I felt their friendship, and the value they placed on it.

Again and again I thought of a line from one of my favorite Christmas songs. “Faithful friends who are dear to us gather near to us once more.” Oh, how I wish I could gather around each of my family and friends who are dear to me so they could feel what I felt that Christmas Eve.

In both instances, there were no strings attached to the gifts, not unless you count the carefully tied ribbon that said much without any words. Each gift was given straight from the heart without expectation of anything in return. If anything was tied, it was my heart knit to the givers of the gift. When presents are presented with love, they stop being things and become memories and meaning. Those are the gifts I value most.

This year, as my own personal prayers have been answered, I have recognized these beautiful gifts as joint gifts from God. I thank Him for the family and friends he has given me. I thank Him for their love and kindness. Every gift that is given without strings or conditions, regardless of the giver, seems to more closely tie the giver and the receiver with the most beautiful ribbon.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

There Will Your Heart Be Also

2010-12-19T19:52:00.000-07:00

Fingering crisp pages lined with fine salt,
The residual of warm ocean air and contemplation,
I look at the sketches drawn in my margins,
Of seashells and conclusions,
Each passage cradling sacred meaning.

The leather-cracked cover worn at the edges,
Feels rich with warmth burnished by hands.
Oils from touch layer on pages,
As time and trial repeatedly evidence
The enduring strength of powerful words.

Thoughts of true friends turn into my own,
Those both present and epochs before.
I read between lines, and write alongside them,
As similar feelings
Leave markings inside my book.

The sharpest impressions that prick my heart
Stitch it together when housed within.
The needle that sews inside my compass
Reveals true north,
Scripture expressed, through choice and action.

Firm in my grip I clench a rare pearl
Protected by pages and salt that I savor.
So close to my heart, I’m willing to give
My most prized possession.
A book. A prophet. My friend.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Good Intentions, Side Effects, and What to Do with Them

2010-12-12T22:45:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you about a personal awkward moment. I think I may have done some harm this week. Deep sigh. I really hope it’s not lasting. But you can imagine my frustration when I learned I had hurt the feelings of someone I care about. My intentions were good, but there were less than desirable side effects that followed my actions.

Reflecting on the last several days brought a second instance to mind. That troubled me. This isn’t the kind of thing I want to become a recurring theme. Then again, perhaps I’m better at creating side effects than I thought.

With the door wide open to my acknowledged faults, I wondered if there were other people I had affected inadvertently. My desire to know seemed to be an open invitation for examples from my memory. The unwelcomed intrusions did more than visit on the porch. They walked in the front door of my mind and brought company.

I sat in thought and began to count. One, two, five, eight…. While some examples were quite small, I recognized that a number of my choices this week had made someone else unhappy. Quickly feeling that the place where I house my thoughts was getting crowded, I closed the door on the line of applicants with comments for my suggestion box. One week’s time seemed like plenty to deal with.

The painful difficulty was that the examples were not anonymous strangers. They were people who are close to me – a brother, a friend, another friend, my wife, my daughter, and the list went on. Each one of them is a person I love very much.

As I considered my circumstance, I thought about a young Jesus who found himself in the middle of a similar predicament. At the age of twelve, he was found by his parents sitting in the temple with men who were listening to him and asking him questions. Mary and Joseph were distraught because they looked for Jesus for three days before finding him. When they asked him why he had dealt with them that way, he responded, “Wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business?” (Luke 2:45-49) He intended to do good, and yet at the same time hurt those who were closest to him, causing them concern.

Less desirable side effects that follow good choices are not uncommon. While I may perceive a choice to be good, someone else may not. Choosing to have more family time may mean less of a favorite pastime for another family member. A decision to save money for a vacation may mean that some other budget gets cut. While discouraging to admit, I think this is just one of the many dilemmas we face as mortals. It’s hard to live without making a mess.

I don’t like negative side effects that smolder in the glow of hot embers. I would much rather repair the emotional distance and close the gap before it has the chance to experience continental drift. This often requires a change of perspective. While pondering how to mitigate the effects of my intentions this week, I remembered a significant conversation with my wife last summer. The outcome of that memory is what we refer to as the 1700 North principle. That happened to be our location when we made an important discovery.

Liz and I had gone for a morning walk and began to discuss a difference of opinion we shared. We simply didn’t agree. In spite of a beautiful sunrise, it felt like the day might be drawing to a close. I felt frustrated and so did she.

Our conversation more closely resembled a familiar tennis match. While we could see the thin net that divided us, and we anticipated where the ball would fall next, we didn’t quite see each other. The score was tied, but neither of us wanted to win at the defeat of the other. We just wanted to end the game. It was time for a different strategy.

You know, it’s hard to return a volley if both players are on the same side of the net. That’s a move that doesn’t make much sense if you like tennis. We found the strategy helps a lot when you care about a person more than you care about the game.

My next move started by admitting my faults and acknowledging how my choices affected my wife. That wasn’t easy to say out loud, but it felt necessary. With my guard down, it was easier for her to drop hers. Next, I expressed my intent in what I had hoped to accomplish, and I asked for forgiveness. Then I listened. I listened as she did the same thing, and the morning became much more enjoyable.

Each of us took down the fences we had built around our perceptions. For the first time that morning we considered each other’s feelings. That seemed to be the key to ending the game, and it worked. We didn’t change each other’s minds, but we figured out a simple way to navigate less desirable side effects from decisions we each thought were good. We worked through it.

The 1700 North principle has been very helpful to me when I find I’ve hurt someone’s feelings. As hard as it was, and as simple as it sounds, seeing was a matter of choice. I may not always be able to control how my decisions affect another person, but I can choose to reduce the gap by changing my vantage point. If I am going to have a recurring theme at the end of the week, I would rather be consistent in considering the feelings of others from the same side of the net.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

My Pile

2010-12-05T23:36:00.000-07:00

Beside me on my desk sits a pile of curious things – a journal, a sketchbook, a letter, and a handheld technological device that I almost always refer to as my phone. Each item is curious for a different but meaningful reason. All of them have one thing in common.

I pulled the journal off the shelf this morning trying to remember the specifics of a vivid memory. The occasion was Christmas Eve a few years before I was married. After an evening spent with my family, a friend of mine stopped by to wish me a Merry Christmas. She and I talked for a while, and then together we delivered a few presents to some of our friends. I returned home to finish writing the last of some homemade Christmas cards I intended to deliver before Christmas Day. Time was running out. When another friend discovered I was up late and intended to make over 45 stops that night, he offered to keep me company on my route. I was glad to have him aboard.

We started just after midnight and so did the snow. It was a beautiful storm! I don’t remember ever being out so late on a Christmas Eve before, especially not while Santa was making deliveries of his own. As you might imagine, the roads were almost empty. The streets were quiet, and the snow was white and fresh with hardly a track besides mine. Because of the storm, it took much longer to deliver my cards – five hours, in fact – but it has remained one of my favorite Christmas memories. Having a friend made all the difference.

Second in my pile, my sketchbook is a journal of a different sort. Its pages capture ink drawings of things I find meaningful or memorable. Instead of being reluctant hostages, the willing memories become my friends and remind me of where we have been. I like using ink because there is a certain feeling of permanence, a lastingness that is beautiful to imagine.

The first drawing in my present sketchbook depicts the pipe organ in the historic Assembly Hall on Temple Square. The occasion of this sketch was a concert my wife and I attended with some friends of ours this last summer. While listening to the performance, we recalled one of our first dates – a holiday season Christmas concert where we sat on a pew not far from where we were that night. The flavor of that memory was discovering how much we liked each other. Fortunate for me she liked my sense of humor. I liked her smile. At the time, I had this secret wish that I could meet a girl, date her over Christmas, and then get married. Well, I’m grateful to report that particular wish worked out for the best.

Loosely placed in my sketchbook are a collection of other related things, such as handwritten napkins, yellow Post-it reminders, ticket stubs, and notes of things I have thought. Since I often take my black, hardcover sketchbook with me wherever I go, it often acts as the repository of other related memories. It becomes the wallet of my thoughts.

The letter in my pile, mentioned above, was an item I happened to discover inside my sketchbook. I believe it was carefully placed by a friend at a time when I needed it most. Written on a pad of business stationary, the note simply said, “Thanks for being my friend! Always.” That simple phrase instantly connected me to experiences I had shared with my friend which were less recent. Like a deep sea expedition to recover a sunken ship, the life boat started tugging treasured moments until they surfaced above the ocean. Somehow, the brief letter managed to tie together a number of memories and make them fresh.

Lastly, at the top of my pile, sits my phone. Different from the journal, the sketchbook, and the letter, it seems to connect me more with the present. My children may not, but I still remember when a phone was used for making phone calls. Now, I think I use my phone more for texting and sending email. We live in a time where there seems to be a need to stay connected constantly. Why? I’m not sure yet, but I’ll confess to feeling something like Christmas morning when my phone vibrates and I have just received a message from someone I care about. I value that feeling. I can be far away from home, and then suddenly feel like I am much closer because of that connection.

Each object in my pile represents the thing I value more than anything else – relationships. There are very important people in my life. I find I am much happier when I stay close to them. Without the people, my journal would be flat, and the permanence of an ink sketch would be insignificant. This Christmas, I hope to refresh my focus on people instead of stuff. I like piles. It’s the piles of memories I have acquired with family and friends that I cherish most.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Thank You

2010-11-28T20:07:00.000-07:00

Beautiful moments, immortal yet fleeting,
Continue to live while housed in my memory.
Slippery recollections secure fast with connections,
As one memory is purposefully linked to another.

Each in a string of moments becomes part of a life,
Carried and sustained by lasting beauty.
The thankful heart that remembers frequently
Too will become immortal as its fuel.

In seeing, I feel and I know, which helps me to heal.
I bow my heart with tears of believing.
Filled with love and wonder, my life I now offer,
Grateful for the beautiful things I remember.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Hey Stranger, Welcome Back

2010-11-21T21:55:00.000-07:00

Meeting someone for the first time can be a unique experience. There are people I am introduced to that I may not expect to see again. Then there are those that have a higher probability of maintaining an acquaintance. I think all of us make judgment calls of how much we need to remember when we meet someone, which makes some introductions more memorable. Some of those come as a surprise. More than the judgments, it’s the surprises that make the introduction unique.

The first time I remember meeting my wife was on a Saturday night. It wasn’t love at first sight, but she was so pretty that I asked a friend to introduce us. Her smile really attracted me. That was the bait. As would be my luck, she made the judgment call that we probably wouldn’t meet again, and by the following Monday, she had already forgotten my name. Well, I can’t fault her for that. We’ve become much more acquainted since then.

Oddly enough, we had already met in some manner two years previous to that time. While neither of us recalls being introduced, we both remember attending the same party and playing the same game with a group of friends. I suppose that makes the subsequent introduction more unique.

As I became acquainted with Liz, there was a very familiar feeling about her. It wasn’t a, “Hey, haven’t we met before?” kind of experience. It was different than that, something that I’m not quite sure how to explain. All I can say is that the way I felt reminded me of something much longer and deeper.

A few years after Liz and I were married, we bought a home and moved into a new ward. I remember going to church one particular Sunday when I walked into the chapel at roughly the same time another guy walked in. That was another unique experience. I looked at him and he looked at me and we both seemed to be wearing the same expression on our faces. I couldn’t place where, but he seemed very familiar to me. We introduced ourselves and then began listing off every possibility of where we could have met. To this day we have had no success in figuring that out, but we have been friends ever since.

Another familiar introduction I have had was with a close friend who is something like a fraternal twin. She and I often share opinions, interests, and temperament, so much so that you might think that we were siblings. Having grown up in two different homes and circumstances, however, has caused us to puzzle over the uniqueness of our friendship. Still we wonder.

With each of these examples there has been a feeling of familiarity that is hard to explain. Each is different, but they have some commonality, too. I don’t know what to attribute these feelings to, but I do know that the veil is often thin enough that there may be several reasons why we sometimes feel this way. Now that I have told you what I don’t know, let me share a few things that I do know that seem both similar and familiar.

Throughout my life I have met people who have had a profound affect on me and have shaped who I am. I have also had experiences that seemed just as significant. In both cases, I am often left with impressions that I don’t know how to place. I feel greater meaning yet I find it difficult to dress the impressions with the correct words to describe them. Still, my inability to articulate the feeling doesn’t negate the validity of the meaning. These relationships and experiences are similar in that they both have familiarity to them. They are also commonly accompanied by a familiar ingredient.

Familiar is a funny term. It can refer to something that I am very well acquainted with, at an expert level as it were, or it can refer to something that makes me feel comfortable and welcome, just as though I were family. When I feel the influence of the Holy Ghost, it is not uncommon for me to feel one or the other, and sometimes both.

One of the divine roles of the Holy Ghost is to be a Comforter to anyone who is exercising their faith. When I feel His influence, I feel the fruits of the spirit, or specific feelings that help me to recognize His influence for what it is. I often feel an increase of love, happiness, and peace. Because of that calming and comforting influence, it becomes easier for me to endure and exercise greater faith when things may seem difficult or impossible.

Another way the Holy Ghost blesses my life is by helping me to remember sacred and important things. He can help me to recall how I felt when I made a covenant with God. He can help me to remember why it was important at the time I made the commitment. The Holy Ghost can also help me remember how my preparations in the past have positioned me to face and overcome temptation. In those most difficult moments when things that should seem clear, but do not, He can help. I believe the Holy Ghost can bring to our remembrance the things that we felt and knew in the premortal world before coming to this earth.

As we feel the influence of the Holy Ghost, he can help us remember the familiar feeling of being in the presence of God. When we are worthy of the gift of the Holy Ghost, and we feel His influence, it is no different than if he were there in person. That feeling can reward our faith by validating that the things we are doing are right.

There are times when I feel closer to the Holy Spirit than others. When His influence is strongest in my life, I feel connected to God. The feeling is familiar in that it reminds me of what I felt like in his presence. It also becomes more and more familiar as I work to stay worthy and keep His influence with me. The more I do, the more I become experienced at learning to recognize what God wants me to do. Someday, I hope to be an expert. I hope to live closely to the Holy Spirit so that He can lead me to follow the example and teachings of the Savior Jesus Christ and live with God again.

The Lord taught Joseph Smith, “put your trust in that Spirit which leadeth to do good – yea, to do justly, to walk humbly, to judge righteously; and this is my Spirit. Verily, verily, I say unto you, I will impart unto you of my Spirit which shall enlighten your mind, which shall fill your soul with joy; And then shall ye know, or by this shall you know, all things whatsoever you desire of me, which are pertaining unto things of righteousness, in faith believing in me that you shall receive.” (Doctrine & Covenants 11:12-14)

In my life, evaluating why relationships and experiences seem familiar has been very helpful. While I certainly have my own opinions about their familiarity, I may not fully recognize why they are important to me at the time. Perhaps it is less important that I know, and more important that my mind is comforted and enlightened at the appropriate times so that I can exercise greater faith. When I recognize that part of the familiarity comes from the Holy Ghost, I can worry less about why, and just know that he is leading me to do good.

There are times in my life when I have felt like a stranger to the will of God. In some instances it was because I chose to act against His will, or I was unwilling to follow the promptings of the Holy Ghost. At other times, it has been because I was caught in a moment of ambiguity where God’s will wasn’t clear to me. I was being tested. In either case, as I have exercised my faith, the feeling of peace and comfort returned and it felt as though I was reintroduced to the Holy Ghost. Those moments can feel very familiar in a variety of ways, sometimes all at the same time. It is as though I was familiar all the time, but had only forgotten.

As I become more and more acquainted with the promptings of the Holy Ghost, I should fully expect to become more familiar with that beautiful feeling. I hope to become less of a stranger to the will of God and instead become more comfortable and more experienced in staying close. Then I will feel like both family and friend to Him.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Full of Corruption

2010-11-15T00:16:00.000-07:00

The bad news about a warning is that it usually isn’t pleasant to hear, and it generally means there is some amount of danger ahead. Typically it comes with the assumption that I should do something. The good news is that warnings are often timely. So for what is it worth, it’s worth considering warnings for what they are.

Occasionally I will stop to read the expiration date stamped on a package of food before I eat it, especially if the package contains perishable fruit or vegetables. I have learned from sad experience that a container of raspberries doesn’t last very long after I buy them (not that I have a lot of restraint from devouring them in one sitting anyway.) However I have noticed, after I have had my share of the raspberries, and another family member hasn’t yet eaten theirs, raspberries soon begin to grow mold and perish. If one starts to spoil, and I don’t notice in time, it doesn’t matter what the warning date on the package says, be it near or far. If I can find the part that is offensive and remove it, I have a chance. When I don’t, the mold spreads quickly and deeply. It devours the raspberries well before I can.

I have been pondering a short verse in the Doctrine & Covenants lately because of what it potentially means for me. The single verse doesn’t appear as a warning, but there are some facts that can be alarming for the careful listener. In a revelation to the prophet Joseph Smith about proclaiming the gospel, the Lord said, “And my vineyard has become corrupted every whit; and there is none which doeth good save it be a few; and they err in many instances because of priestcrafts, all having corrupt minds.” (Doctrine & Covenants 33:4)

The vineyard is the place where the Lord does his work, which is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of His children. He hopes and desires that each vine will bear desirable fruit. It sounds devastating for the Lord of the vineyard to visit his place of work and find that it has become completely corrupted. Fortunately, the Lord is never surprised. He knows the end from the beginning, and He knows how to warn us. He knows how to do His work and save His children, as long as we choose to heed the warnings stamped in the scriptures.

It doesn’t take much for a container of my favorite fruit to be corrupted. A package of raspberries may look quite the same at a distance when mold has already begun to grow. Only a careful look will reveal the light, white, and fuzzy texture beginning to appear. This is usually the first indicator. Everything else will appear the same. The fruit may look whole. The color will be just as rich and deep, and the juices will still taste fresh. Only the miniscule presence of something so anonymous as the delicate ingredient of mold gives any kind of warning that corruption has already begun. Nothing has changed except the presence of early corruption.

When the Lord says that His vineyard has become corrupted, every whit, there isn’t much room for exception. This suggests that I especially am not an exception (which is my favorite way to read the scriptures.) The part about none doing good, save it be a few, suggests to me that among all those who are corrupted, the pure in heart are small in number. Yes, there is good everywhere, but self-justification to gratify our own pleasures is also widespread. The Lord said that even those few who are good err because of priestcrafts. Like the raspberries, everything else may still look good, even when corruption is present.

While the act of corrupting may mean destroying the integrity and morality of someone or something, corrupt can also simply mean alter, mar, or taint. It is when the initial corruption, or presence of some foreign defect, merely appears that corruption begins to take place. Then, when we accept and even ignore this presence, the more severe corruption begins to become permanent. That’s when the mold gets ugly and the flavor changes.

The prophet Moroni gave a similar warning to the Lord’s for those who would live in the last days before the second coming of the Savior. Near the end of his life, he said, “Behold, the Lord hath shown unto me great and marvelous things concerning that which must shortly come, at that day when these things shall come forth among you. Behold, I speak unto you as if ye were present, and yet ye are not. But behold, Jesus Christ hath shown you unto me, and I know your doing.” (Mormon 8:34-35) Moroni then states that we walk in the pride of our own hearts. There are none but a few who do not. He then says that we love our money, our possessions and the appearance of our churches more than we love the poor. Ouch. That one hurts.

Moroni also describes this as a time where there will be great pollutions on the earth. Important as it may be in considering our stewardships over the earth, I don’t think he is talking about air quality and carbon footprints. Instead he then lists pollutions such as murder, theft, dishonesty, immorality, and other abominations. He also describes the attitude that exclaims, “it mattereth not.” I think it does.

I have often reflected on this passage because Moroni seems to be speaking to “you” and I, rather than “other people” who may never read the book. There is often a tendency to think that because I have a firm belief that the book is true, Moroni must be talking about someone else, that is unless I don’t believe in making exceptions.

I may not be a liar, a murderer, or an adulterer, but I can ask myself some probing questions to see how these passages of scripture apply. If the vineyard is corrupted every whit, and there are great pollutions all around, is my inheritance the only thing that is in danger of being corrupted? What about my present decisions? Am I still at a critical point where my fruit is good but I am surrounded by light and fluffy mold that is becoming more and more pervasive? If I am, how do I know? To answer these questions, I need to take a closer look at my life and do some self-examining, regardless of how far away the expiration date may be.

The prophet Nephi gave an excellent definition of what priestcrafts are in his writings within the Book of Mormon. Speaking of the Lord’s teachings, he said, “He commandeth that there shall be no priestcrafts; for, behold, priestcrafts are that men preach and set themselves up for a light unto the world, that they may get gain and praise of the world; but they seek not the welfare of Zion.” (2 Nephi 26:29) When our own opinions become more important than the will of God, we are in danger. When the examples we set for others begin to lead them away from the truth rather than toward it, we set ourselves up as a light to the world. If we justify and rationalize our actions instead of acknowledging our errors, so that we can have pleasure and personal gain, we are at the heart of this warning. At that point we are no longer just surrounded by priestcraft, we are active practitioners.

One does not have to imitate the priesthood to practice priestcraft. Ceremony and ritual are not required. In order to qualify, one only has to provide an alternate plan to Father’s plan of happiness for His children. While I may not practice priestcraft, I think these passages of scripture still apply to me because of what the Lord himself said about those who are good, that “they err in many instances because of priestcrafts, all having corrupt minds.” Even if I am not rationalizing or justifying sin, I am curious to know how these pervasive influences are affecting my mind, causing me to err.

At the heart of the messages given to us by the Lord, Moroni, and Nephi is a clear dichotomy between pride and charity. If I wish to know where I stand before God, I should measure my pride. The scriptures provide adequate warnings against pride and the reoccurring pride cycle. If we examine them, and seek to apply them, we can see how we measure up to priestcrafts by first seeing how we measure up to the word of God. There is no clear standard for corruption unless we first understand what it is to be pure.

Nephi continues, “Behold, the Lord hath forbidden this thing; wherefore, the Lord God hath given a commandment that all men should have charity, which charity is love. And except they should have charity they were nothing. Wherefore, if they should have charity they would not suffer the laborer in Zion to perish.” (2 Nephi 26:30)

Similarly, Moroni recorded the teachings of his Father, Mormon, when he said, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love….” (Moroni 7:48)

Because there are some clear models and warnings in the scriptures, we can judge where we are in society. Pride is at the heart of the pollutions. Pride leads to vanity and vain ambition, which are the seeds of lust. Secret combinations seek to destroy society and pull it down. These things may not have entered into our hearts, but they may begin to appear lightly around us, just as mold appears softly and quietly, almost hard to discern.

So, the bad news is that we are living in the time foretold by Moroni where we are surrounded by pollutions. We live in a time, as told by the Lord, that the vineyard is entirely corrupt, and all of us have corrupted minds – we are surrounded by harmful things that will even taint the decisions made by good people, causing them to err. We are surrounded by priestcrafts and the philosophies of men that can lead us away from God if we don’t heed His counsel. Our proximity to pride and vanity is so close that we may not see it for what it is. If the growth of this mold is gradual, we may even accept it as the norm. The best way to prevent it is to look for it.

The good news is that there is an antidote. It is possible to resist the corruption that surrounds us. Prophesies have been foretold of the restoration of all things in the fullness of times. This is an expiration date worth looking forward to – a time when wickedness will expire and give way to millennial rest. Rather than being consumed with pride, the pure in heart will be filled with charity. They will pray earnestly for this gift. The love of Christ, and a love for Christ, will help us to be anxiously engaged in causes for good. There is no greater cause than the cause of Zion, which seeks not to tear down society, but to build it.

We can protect ourselves against selfishness and pride by seeking the gift which seeketh not her own, even the gift of charity. We can protect against pollutions and corruption by seeking the pure in heart and the cause of Zion. We can watch for subtle and anonymous mold by starting with our own hearts. As long as we are not complacent and ignorant that there are pollutions all around, we can find greater peace in protecting the fruits of our faith against corruption and error. All the Lord requires is an honest heart that is willing to give up and forsake the pollution.

“Verily I say unto you, all among them who know their hearts are honest, and are broken, and their spirits are contrite, and are willing to observe their covenants by sacrifice – yea, every sacrifice which I the Lord, shall command – they are accepted of me. For I, the Lord, will cause them to bring forth as a very fruitful tree which is planted in a goodly land, by a pure stream, that yieldeth much precious fruit.” (Doctrine & Covenants 97:8-9)

If all have corrupt minds, perhaps this indicates that we are being affected by unhealthy influences rather than being ruined or devastated. If we have desires to serve God and keep His commandments, then maybe the corruption refers to the slow growing ideas that seem pleasing at first, but will soon alter the flavor of our lives and cause them to deteriorate.

Rather than pretend that I am immune to mold, I can choose to look for the first signs of pride that attempt to taint my heart. I can watch for selfish motives that lead me away from the teachings of the Savior. I can pray for help to see the influences in my life that really aren’t healthy but have been there so long that I don’t notice them. When I discover parts that have spoiled, I may have to cut them out. If this is the cost of acceptance, I would rather have fruit that is worthy of eternal life than let all of my favorite fruit spoil. There are few things that compare with the untainted flavor of my favorite fruit. Nothing compares with the unspoiled taste of eternal life. The hope of maintaining this fruit is worth the effort to remove any corrupting influences that can taint my heart.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

One Complete Turn

2010-11-07T21:28:00.000-07:00

Occasionally I find myself ashamed because of a look my wife will give me. A little perturbed but mostly amused, it’s the look that says, “Are you still listening or is your mind somewhere else?” “Oh,” I think to myself. “Um… sorry.” My own recognition of my folly is usually accompanied by a slight shoulder shrug as I gesture that I wasn’t paying attention like I thought I was. Silly me. As hard as I try to stay present, I’m not always successful. Perhaps you’ve been there, too.

As Liz and I have regular conversations, she will often say something that sparks a thought that takes me in a slightly different direction than she was intending. The idea is intriguing, and suddenly I am off on a “thought-chain” where one idea leads to another. It just happens that the end of my chain doesn’t connect with hers and I have to forge a link to bring us back together. I’m glad we can make those kinds of connections.

Fortunately in our relationship, I am not alone in this regard. (Grin. It’s nice having something in common. I don’t feel so strange that way.) I may have things I really want to share with my wife only to find out that she isn’t fully engaged either. On any given day, either of us can be preoccupied with other details that keep us from connecting fully with the other. Yes, we may be having the same conversation together, and we both may be listening. However, it’s the specific way that we listen that can make all the difference.

What a wonderful thing it is to have a friend! On a number of occasions this past year I have talked about friendship, conversations, and connections on this blog. If you didn’t know me better, you might think I was referring to social networking like Facebook or Twitter. My gratitude goes far deeper than that. Whether it is my wife, a parent, one of my children, or a very close friend, I treasure the opportunity to truly connect.

This year, more than any other year in my life, I have discovered what a wonderful thing it is to have something unique to share and have a friend whose interest matches my own. It is simply exhilarating! Deep closeness, commonality, and sharing can forge a powerful connection between two people. As I have considered how rewarding this kind of relationship is, I have been more diligent to improve all of my relationships with others. I have tried to find more connection with whoever I am with. Not only has this improved many friendships, it has also made me reconsider the most important relationship in my life.

On more than one occasion, I have found myself ashamed to admit that the private prayer I just offered to God on my knees seemed very familiar. It was so familiar, in fact, that it could almost have been a written prayer – one with a formula where certain things need to be said in a certain order to get a certain result. I almost jest that a number could be assigned to that prayer as though I was placing an order for a combination plate on a dinner menu. Hmm. I’m not sure that meets the intent of why I pray. But it happens. Whether I am tired, indifferent, or distracted by a thought-chain, my chain still does not connect with Father’s and I have to forge a link to bring us back together.

In contrast, there have been times in my life where certain prayers felt more powerful. Because I was in great need, and I tried to be very sincere, it was as though I had access to a VIP hotline that is sure to get results. Those prayers were meaningful. They were deeply close. I felt connected to Father in Heaven, if only by prayer, and I could pour out my heart to him. These are prayers I would consider recommending for my own personal hall of fame. They are prayers that are worth remembering – not the words, but what I felt.

As I compare the most rewarding conversations I have had with those where I am not fully engaged, I have noticed a pattern. When I talk to my wife, a close friend, or with Father in prayer, my ability to feel connected has less to do with outside circumstances and more to do with the combined intent of myself and the person I am talking with. I don’t think my hall of fame conversations need to be left to chance or serendipity. More often than not, they are a matter of choice.

The car that I currently drive has an automatic transmission. While I learned to drive with a stick shift in a standard car, an automatic has become my standard preference. Switching gears has become so automatic that I hardly think about it, yet I believe it has a good application here. In order to shift, the clutch must be disengaged by pressing the pedal on the floor. Doing so allows for the gears to change. However, if I push on the clutch pedal but never release, then I can’t engage the gears to move and I come to a halt.

When my prayers become so automatic that I am not fully present in mind, it’s as though the clutch is not engaging the gears that allow for a connection that will take me someplace better. Instead, I go through the motions of having a meaningful conversation, but don’t really get anywhere at all. In essence, I offer prayer #18 because it was a good one worth repeating. But unless I really mean it, I get stuck. If I feel that I need help and my prayers are not being answered, this is one of the first places I check.

The Book of Mormon prophet, Moroni, concluded his record with a promise whereby readers might know if the book is truly scripture. He invites all to read it and then promises that God will manifest the truth of it by the power of the Holy Ghost. I believe this to be the right kind of formula for answers to all of our prayers. The key is to “ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ,” and then He will manifest the truth to us. (Moroni 10:3-5) Having faith and being sincere is crucial to the equation, but just as important is the need for real intent – or the intent to receive the answer and follow once it is given.

All too often, my intent becomes apparent by where my heart and mind are directed. If I am talking with my wife, but I am thinking about something else, then it is hard to be turned toward her thoughts in that moment. If I am talking with a friend, but I am not really engaged in what they are saying, it is difficult to make a connection. Where I especially want to be connected is with Father when I pray. I want to feel that my prayers are being heard and will be answered, just as He has promised. God doesn’t change, and He is always listening. He has promised to take care of us and answer us when we are not of little faith. I know that He does, and I feel it most when I turn my heart to Him.

I have a combination lock at home that I use when I go to the local rec center for some exercise. In order to open the lock, I have to know the right combination of turns. A typical combination lock requires you to make several turns to the right to clear the lock of any memory. This is followed by a complete turn to the left and another partial turn to the right. As long as I turn to the right places on the dial, the lock opens.

Like my combination lock, there is a combination of things that are calculated to unlock answers to my prayers. All I need is a sincere heart, real intent, and faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. The answers I seek are not restricted. Father is merely protecting His blessings until I have turned my heart towards Him. Once we each turn our hearts to Him, He is willing to give us everything. Also like the lock, there are some changes I have to make in my life that are very minor. Quite often it may be as simple as a decision to focus and listen when Father is trying to speak to me. There are other times that I have to turn and turn and turn until I clear the memory of the lock, or rather, desires that are so strong they override my faith. What is most important is to make a complete turn, which has a slightly different definition in the scriptures.

The Lord has often warned His people against becoming a stiffnecked generation. When we become prideful and determined to do what we want instead of choosing what He asks us to do, we lose any intent we may have had to follow God. We become stubborn and persistent in doing that which will lead us away from Him. While this may sound like it could apply to the most serious of sins, it also has application in our daily communication with our Father.

As we turn to God in prayer, we keep our necks flexible and agile. When we begin each day with prayer, and real intent, the events that follow will have a set direction. The physical direction may vary and meander, but the spiritual direction will become more and more rigid on the will of our Father. By turning our hearts fully, it matters less how much we turn than where we turn. A complete turn is learning to trust Him completely. We then turn our lives over to him along with our faith and our sacrifices.

Moses also taught the ancient Israelites of the importance of turning to God. He warned them that they would be scattered because they were already scattered in their hearts and in their will to serve the one true God. But, he also told them that they would be gathered if they would turn completely to Him.

“But if… thou shalt seek the Lord thy God, thou shalt find him, if thou seek him with all thy heart and with all thy soul. When thou are in tribulation, and all these things are come upon thee, even in the latter days, if thou turn to the Lord thy God, and shalt be obedient unto his voice; (For the Lord thy God is a merciful God;) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, nor forget the covenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them. (Deuteronomy 4:29-31)

Seeking the Lord starts with prayer. Completely turning to him requires that we are engaged in conversation to learn His will. If we intend to live with Him again, then we should have real intent to start following Him now, as much as is within our ability.

As I think about beautiful conversations I have had this year that have been deep and meaningful, where I felt very connected to a friend, I begin to wish that every conversation were that way. If I truly believe that Father is waiting for me to initiate such a conversation with Him so He can speak to me as a friend, I have to ask, “What am I waiting for? Why don’t I make every prayer qualify for my own personal hall of fame?” Even if I am not sure how to develop such a close friendship with Him, he has already given the promise. If we seek Him, we will find Him.

If our hearts have not yet turned, we can at least start turning. An effort to do so will demonstrate real intent. Then, when we arrive at the first correct step, we can make another turn. A combination of complete turns to God will eventually unlock the answers to prayer that we seek and enable us to make a deeper connection with Father as a friend.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Those that I Care For

2010-10-31T16:41:00.000-06:00

The plant that I water wilted so slightly,
Though rooted to stones in the pot where it sits.
Occasionally I worry I’ll water too much,
Then starve the leaves by not sparing enough.

With countenance fallen, I see my misdeed,
As leaves sag with want of voice and touch.
Soil that is rich, but dry and parched,
Has not the means to yield its full strength.

Oft it is I, and not my plant, that wilts,
Yearning for water and light for my stalks.
As my heart turns to watering, my eyes soon follow,
Full of gratitude for those who water my ground.

Sturdier the plant, and more tender the leaves
That learn to depend on a caring source.
With light from above and water in my hand
Gently I’ll watch over those that I care for.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

I'm a Mormon

2010-10-25T01:06:00.000-06:00

Hi, I’m John McConkie

I’m a designer, an architect, a reader, a runner, and a family guy. I’m a Mormon.

About Me

Oh, and I also love deep conversations, music, philosophy, thinking, psychology, writing, poetry, sketching, painting, hiking, camping, cycling, and… the list goes on and on. I think there is an endless stream of good things to experience in life – things that are meaningful and fascinating. If you ever feel that you have so many interests that you have to pare things down, then you and I have something in common.

I love to live life with passion and intensity! I like to get the most out of life – enjoy it for all it’s worth. I would rather miss out on a little sleep than miss an opportunity that might not come around again. More than that, I love to share those things that have meaning with a friend. Having something in common like that really strengthens relationships, especially those that matter most. I don’t know what I would do without my family and close friends – people who care and stand by me in any circumstance, even when life isn’t so inspiring.

My favorite person to share with is my beautiful wife. She and I have been married for sixteen years and we have a family of three boys and two girls. They are a lot of work, but a LOT of fun! We have great times together. There is never a dull moment at our house, not unless everyone is gone. We may not have a perfect marriage, or a perfect family, but we definitely have something special that is worth cherishing!

For most of my life I have lived in Utah and I love it! I love the mountains and prairies, the beautiful snow, the deep forests, and the red rock deserts. Besides Utah, I have spent a lot of time living in California, too. It’s my other home. Give me a beach with a view of the ocean and I’m more than content. Most of the time, however, home is more of an attitude. When I am surrounded by my favorite people in the world, I can’t think of a better place to call home than that.

Why I am a Mormon

I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t acknowledge that I am a Mormon because of my family, at least to start with. Many of my family lines have been members of the church for eight generations and were among the pioneers who first came by wagon to settle the west. All the stories you may have heard about the Mormons coming west, well, that was them. They had a lot of faith. They left a lot behind, and they also left me a rich heritage of courage and determination that has shaped who I am. Yet that isn’t enough to for me to be a Mormon. You see, I’m big on experience, especially experiencing things for myself.

I’m a Mormon because of my own faith and what I have learned. I’m not a skeptic, but I tend to question everything. I want to know why, and I want to know for myself. Taking things on “good faith” isn’t enough for me. I want my own faith. I want to believe in something because it is right, and not just because someone else said so.

When I was younger – when I was in high school, in fact – I had an experience that changed me, or at least changed the way I thought about spiritual things. I had been taught to read the scriptures as a way to feel closer to God. I had read in the Old and New Testaments, and the Book of Mormon, and I believed they were true. I knew they were a record of God’s dealings with His children, but I hadn’t quite internalized them yet. That’s when things changed.

On one occasion, I was reading in the Book of Mormon when I felt something different. It wasn’t dramatic, and I didn’t see angels, but I felt something. It was while I was reading the story of a young man named Nephi. He was a good role model, but he seemed a little out of reach, like he was something that I couldn’t be. Nephi always seemed to be obedient. He wasn’t rebellious and he didn’t complain. Instead, he did his best to learn what God wanted him to do and then he did it, or so I thought.

I gained a new appreciation for Nephi, when I came to the part where he mentioned his weaknesses. I was shocked. Instead of thinking that he was close to perfect, I listened to him express his frustrations about temptations and how they could so easily overwhelm him. Suddenly I realized that this role model of a prophet was more like me than I had thought. I could relate, and that started a change. A small feeling of hope began to grow. That is when I felt something else.

As I continued to read, I experienced a comforting feeling that just felt good. It was peaceful yet inspiring and energizing. It felt new but familiar at the same time. Looking back, I believe it was something I had felt before but hadn’t quite recognized. That something was the witness of the Holy Ghost. I remember the impression coming to my mind that the words I had just read were true. The account wasn’t just a story. It was a true experience of someone who wasn’t that different from me. I felt like I had just made a friend because we shared something in common and he had given me encouragement.

This instance led me to other experiences in the scriptures where I learned more about the ministry of Jesus Christ in the New Testament. Instead of just reading, I internalized it. I studied the promises made to ancient prophets in the Old Testament, and I read about the appearance of Jesus Christ to the ancient people on this continent after His resurrection. Again and again I had that same confirming feeling that what I read was true. When I experienced this feeling, I felt connected with God – that somehow He was able to communicate with me through that comforting feeling to let me know he was pleased with what I was doing.

This feeling of closeness to God is the reason why I am a Mormon. When I learn something new and I get that feeling, I know I am heading in the right direction. I may be far from perfect, but that feeling gives me confidence. It also gives me a greater reason to have faith and make good choices when things are hard. The more I have learned about my own faith, the more I have felt that comforting feeling.

I know God lives, and I know He will speak to us through the feelings of the Holy Spirit. I Know Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer. Because of what I have felt, I know the Book of Mormon is true, and I know the Bible is true. This feeling of peace and comfort guides me in everything that I do. I know it is a pattern that God wants for all of His children.

How I Live My Faith

I don’t think my faith needs to be showy, but it should be apparent in how I live each day. For me, it starts with prayer. Because I believe in God, I pray to Him in the morning when I wake up. I kneel down at night, and sometimes I pray while I am I’m driving in my car. Wherever I am, I try not to let my prayers be repetitive. Since God is our Father in Heaven, I try to talk to Him like my father. I express my gratitude for how He has blessed me, and I ask Him for direction. When I do, I feel the influence of the Holy Spirit guide me to make good choices.

In addition to daily prayer, I still try to read in the scriptures every day. Some days it may be just a few verses, and other times I get to study a subject more in depth. As often as I do this with the intent to increase my faith and repent, I feel that connection with God that I felt years ago when I was in high school.

Quite often, praying and reading the scriptures is just a small part of how I live. The real test is how I act during the week when I’m not at church. It shows in the way I treat other people when I am at work. It also shows in the types of things I do when I have spare time. I am happier when I try to live like Jesus did. The gospel of Jesus Christ is so closely woven into everything I do. It has made me a kinder person. I am more patient and less selfish. I feel so much better when I am focusing outward toward others instead of just satisfying my own interests.

Living my faith has made our home a much better place, too. My love for my wife increases as I feel closer to God. When I try to follow Jesus Christ, I feel like a better husband and a better dad. If I can be a greater example, it’s more likely that our kids will try to do the same. This gives us the best chance possible to feel the comforting influence of the Holy Spirit in our home. When all of us feel that influence, we want to be better. We try harder. We have a deeper motivation to forgive each other and we are much, much happier. And to think, it all starts with faith.

Serving in the church gives me another opportunity to live my faith. Each member of a congregation is given a calling, or an opportunity to serve as a teacher, a leader, or some other role that can bless someone else. Quite often I have been given callings where I had no experience in that area beforehand. I have served as a scoutmaster, a choir director, a teacher, and numerous other callings. I have even served as a full-time missionary for two years. Each calling has provided me an opportunity to rely on God for help and become something that I wasn’t before. This has taken faith on my part, but has been well worth it. I have really enjoyed the different callings I have had.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are Mormon Temples Used For?

We consider the temple to be the House of the Lord. It is a special place of worship where members must prepare themselves spiritually in order to enter. It is also a place where we can feel the influence of the Holy Spirit without the distractions of the world.

Inside the temple we learn about God’s plan for His children and what we must do in order to live with Him again. Those who go to the temple do so to make promises to God, called covenants. They promise to be obedient to His commandments as a demonstration of their commitment to Him. In return, God promises His children blessings in this life and in the life to come.

These covenants are made during sacred ceremonies, called ordinances. One example is marriages that are performed not just until death, but for eternity, making it possible for families to be together forever. Without these covenants and ordinances, we cannot receive all the fullest blessings that God has prepared for His children.

While members of the church enter the temple to participate in these sacred ceremonies for themselves, they also return again and again to perform these ordinances vicariously in behalf of those who are deceased but may not have been able to enter a holy temple. For instance, someone who did not have the opportunity to be baptized during their lifetime may have the baptism performed for them so that they can choose whether or not to accept this work done in their behalf. This is the primary reason why members of the church research genealogy and their family history.

The temple happens to be my favorite place on earth. Whenever I need additional guidance in my life, or I desire to be closer to God, I go to the temple to worship and ponder solutions to my problems. When I go to the temple, I feel such a comforting, peaceful feeling that makes it easier for me to think about God and my relationship with Him. I love how I feel when I worship in the temple.

Personal Stories

Why/How do you share the gospel with your friends?

I love to share what I have learned with anyone who is interested. I have been given so many blessings by God, and I have been blessed by so many others who have been kind to me, I hope I can do something to share what I have been given. Most often this happens in conversation. "Hey, guess what happened to me? I just discovered the coolest thing! Would you like to come with me? I think you would enjoy this." The best way to share things that matter most is to share it with a friend.

For more information about Mormons and what they believe, or if you would like to create your own profile on why you are a Mormon, visit:
http://www.mormon.org/

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Passions and Toilet-Ditching

2010-10-17T21:30:00.002-06:00

Watching an incensed eight-year-old can be quite amusing. Listening to her is another matter. It takes a great deal of patience when passionate words are expressed with great animosity the way they were in our house this morning. The reason? A harmless gesture of friendship, I think. The culprit remains unknown, but rumors are spreading among those who know our oldest son. The victim? Our youngest daughter, or more accurately, her injured pride.

Snow came early to our house this year, or so it seemed. No one else on the block appeared to be affected by the fresh white stuff that was delivered to our address in the middle of the night. Our yard was lightly flocked with rolls of streaming toilet paper. It actually looked quite festive, I thought. In fact, it brought back some fond memories of when I… was the age of our oldest. Back then, we referred to such an event as being toilet-papered. This morning I was corrected, or brought up to date.

“I can’t believe someone ‘toilet-ditched’ our house!” Exclaimed our eight-year old. “They’re so mean! I hate them! I don’t wanna leave the house until it’s cleaned up. It’s too embarrassing! They even got our plants!” I had a very hard time holding back the laughter, especially since she is often not inclined to clean up anything. I had no idea that she would be so bothered by such a token of friendship. “It’s not funny! It’s mean!” She retorted.

Apparently she had recently been informed about toilet-ditching by a good friend who had witnessed the same phenomenon occur across the street from her house. That was enough reason for our daughter to be indignant. Having also heard about the previous event, our next two children in line by age had somewhat milder reactions. They asked, “Why would someone do that?” When we explained how teens often view toilet-papering as a gesture to demonstrate friendship and get some attention, they seemed to be okay with it and thought it was funny, too. But not our youngest. Nope. She simply responded, “I DON’T CARE!!”

I was intrigued by how quickly an eight-year-old can make a judgment based on perception and hearsay. Intent wasn’t even taken into consideration. Immediately, walls went up and she put herself on the defensive. Reasoning didn’t seem to have any effect. The strange thing was that her emotions were real and acute. It was as if she had been personally wounded by the toilet paper, no matter how many plies of softness it had.

Like many previous instances, I found myself doing some self-examination. Am I ever too quick to judge? Do I ever disregard intent and choose to hear the parts I want to hear? Do I blow things out of proportion over something silly? Do I ignore all the good things I know because something small offends me? The answer is yes. I would dare say that most people, if not all, are sailing in the same boat on that one. Though you may not recognize it, my eight-year-old and I have a lot in common. Hopefully a few more years of experience have given me some added sophistication, but I would still admit to doing the same things in smaller ways where my judgments have a little less bite.

This pattern is worth examining more carefully so that we are not overpowered by loud voices around us. Isaiah the prophet warned, “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter. Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!” (Isaiah 5:20-21) Becoming angry about a display of toilet paper in one’s yard may seem a trivial thing, and indeed it is. Failing to recognize the seeds of ignorance because of our own passions and interests is not so small of a concern. Anytime I make a judgment based on limited information, and then proceed to defend it based on even more limited understanding, I engage in the process of becoming ignorant. I begin to ignore another point of view in spite of the fact that the whole scene is before my eyes, if I will but look. I can listen if I so choose. “He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.” (Matthew 11:15)

Compelling emotions such anger, love, fear, and lust become passions as they enter our hearts. Making room for good passions is not wrong. Allowing unwholesome passions to dominate our thoughts and feelings, both, is a serious concern. If our passions go unchecked, regardless of whether they are right or wrong, they become a prominent voice that can lead us toward ignorance. We ignore things that we should pay attention to. It is then that our passions override our reason and sensibility.

The prophet Alma cautioned his son, Shiblon, in his efforts to serve others with regard to passions. He said, “I would that ye would be diligent and temperate in all things. See that ye are not lifted up unto pride; yea, see that ye do not boast in your own wisdom, nor of your much strength. Use boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love….” (Alma 38:10-12) Alma did not tell his son to suppress his passions, or deny that they exist. Instead he told him to bridle them and control them. He instructed him to use caution by being moderate and balanced where he could maintain control. Depending on our choices, desire can become love or lust. Anger can lead to hate or positive action. If we can steer our divinely given passions, we have greater motivation to do good. It is when we allow our passions to bridle us that we become increasingly ignorant.

In my daughter’s defense with the case of toilet-ditching, there is a significant difference between ignorance and innocence, though both may result in the same outward behavior. If anything, I admire her absolute honesty in expressing feelings that she does not yet know how to control. Those who don’t have a full understanding of truth, but make the best decisions with the knowledge they have may be considered innocent. But those who have an opportunity to see and choose not to because they are empowered by their passions choose the path of ignorance. The danger of this path, the more we become familiar with it, is that we become less able to bridle our passions. As we choose to ignore truth and defend our passions, pleasure reinforces our ignorance as though it were a good behavior. We give up our innocence for ignorant pleasure.

Speaking of the mysteries of God, Alma taught the people of Ammonihah, “he that will harden his heart, the same receiveth the lesser portion of the word; and he that will not harden his heart to him is given the greater portion of the word, until it is given unto him to know the mysteries of God until he know them in full. And they that will harden their hearts, to them is given the lesser portion of the word until they know nothing concerning his mysteries; and then they are taken captive by the devil, and led by his will down to destruction. Now this is what is meant by the chains of hell.” (Alma 12:10-11)

Like our passions, our choices will take us in one of two directions. Choosing the path of the innocent will allow us to come unto Christ and follow Him. Choosing to be ignorant will lead us further away from the truth. At whatever level of ignorance we are comfortable with, our choices will lead us that much closer to the devil, causing us to follow him and become his children instead. If we truly know this, and then declare, “I DON’T CARE!” we demonstrate our own ignorance. Faithful innocence leads to intelligence, while fervent ignorance does not.

In His teachings to the Nephites of our passions and false self-justification, Jesus said, “Behold, I give unto you a commandment, that ye suffer none of these things to enter into your heart; For it is better that ye should deny yourselves of these things, wherein ye will take up your cross, than that ye should be cast into hell.” (3 Nephi 12:29-30) If these things have entered into our hearts, it would be best if they become dispensable and disposable like a roll of tissue paper. If we are going to ditch anything, it should be our bad habits, our unrestrained passions, and our self-justifications; not the Lord who has already cleared the path for us to follow Him.

On the matter of toilet paper, there are a few other things that are worth consideration. For right or wrong, our attitudes towards our passions, and the passions of others, can greatly affect our judgments. A favorable attitude towards someone we love deeply can sway our decisions to be more like them. A less favorable attitude with someone we do not see eye to eye with may cause us to misjudge their intent. In both cases, our integrity should not be disposed of like tissue paper. If it is to be dispensed, then care should be taken to share our integrity and not trade it. Once it is lost, it is hard to get it back. That’s not to say that you can’t.

In discussing our toilet-ditching with my wife this morning, she told me of a woman in the neighborhood where she grew up who had a unique attitude towards toilet-papering. There was a period of time in her family where, due to the popularity of her children, their house would be toilet-papered every other week. Instead of being angry, the mother simply tasked her children with the responsibility of gathering the toilet paper from their yard, like manna as it were, and then they would use the reclaimed tissue in their house. Consequently, they didn’t have to buy tissue paper for a long time. This mother chose to see this gesture of friendship, not as an intrusion, but as an opportunity.

What a difference it would make in life if we could harness our God-given ability to judge righteously in pursuit of intelligence instead of ignorance. When someone leaves you with a mess of toilet paper to deal with, figuratively speaking, it’s good to ask yourself, “What was their intent? Am I reading their intent correctly? Is this worth getting worked up over? How can I communicate more effectively to see their point of view?” So many problems in life would go away if people could learn how to communicate and see the point of view of someone different from themselves. Whether discussing something as trivial as toilet paper or a topic that is personal and sensitive, more can be accomplished when we are willing to have a discussion at all instead of saying, “I don’t care!”

Most situations in life have at least two perspectives. Except where eternal truths are involved, so much of what we disagree on is a matter of choice. Learning to see the point of view of others gives us a more complete picture. It’s closer to the whole picture. When we learn to see the way God sees – without bias, fear, prejudice, selfish ambition, pride, or self-justification – then we can enjoy the peace that is His, the peace that He so freely desires to give us when we turn our hearts to Him.

The cost of happiness is integrity of heart. This integrity is earned when we are willing to do the right thing for no other reason than because it is right. It comes when we are willing to put aside our differences and defend truth more than our point of view alone. This is a path to lasting happiness. Once you get a good taste, you will want to ditch any substitutes and dispose of them with your tissue paper.

Our passions, when bridled and used correctly, are powerful motivators for good. Governing our passions with integrity, to ourselves and to others, helps to maintain a focus on the things that matter most. Repeating this kind of behavior is my favorite kind of intelligence.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Pleasure Central

2010-10-10T21:40:00.000-06:00

Today happens to be a unique occurrence where the calendar resembles a slot machine in any of a large number of Las Vegas casinos. When written numerically, today’s date appears as 10-10-10. JACKPOT!! Right? Well, even if the numbers line up for someone on a slot machine, I’m not sure that is the best indicator of whether or not they are winning where it counts. It may be a small moment of achievement for the winner when certain bells ka-ching and lights bling, but what do these signals really mean?

Friends who have been in a casino when someone has won a jackpot have described what they saw. Not being an eye-witness, I’ll have to take their word for it. Perhaps you can correct me if your experience has been different. What I have been told is that casino representatives were quickly on the scene when a slot machine announced a winner. The machine was secured and checked to make sure that the person who supplied the winning coin didn’t win by deceptive means. There was even a level of doubt about the character of the winner, as if they had committed a crime by winning. Whether or not you like to gamble is not my focus today. However, I find it fascinating that a casino representative might be more concerned about validity of a small moment of pleasure than the one who is the supposed beneficiary.

We are surrounded by an endless number of voices that labor to persuade our attentions. Some of them ka-ching and bling, and others come as sharp warnings. The same voice may be pleasing on one occasion, and painful to hear on another. To me, this suggests an important principle about discernment. How good I feel about a particular voice may not be the best indicator of whether it is right or not.

A week ago in General Conference, I heard Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles talk about lures, addictions, and pleasure. This topic has been on my mind since, especially as it relates to voices. As he spoke of addictions he said, “According to the dictionary, addiction of any kind means to surrender to something, thus relinquishing agency and becoming dependent on some life-destroying substance or behavior.” This intrigues me – the fact that certain behaviors can cause us to relinquish our ability to choose, and perhaps even recognize.

He continues, “Researchers tell us there is a mechanism in our brain called the pleasure center. When activated by certain drugs or behaviors, it overpowers the part of our brain that governs our willpower, judgment, logic, and morality. This leads the addict to abandon what he or she knows is right.”

So I wonder, “How is it that the human body can be such a divine gift and yet have inclinations that can be so self-destructive? How is it that our own internal voice can be so difficult as to discern whether it is right or not?” I believe the answer was given by King Benjamin in a discourse to his people.

“For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, … willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” (Mosiah 3:19)

Though they appear as opposites, I don’t think it is a coincidence that the actions described by Elder Ballard are so similar to those taught by King Benjamin. Elder Ballard cautioned against surrendering to something that requires us to relinquish agency. King Benjamin encouraged his people to yield and surrender, even submit their will to God. It is not the act of surrender or submission that is good or bad. It is what we accomplish by doing so. Surrendering our will so we can make fewer choices is a damning principle. It stops our progression. Surrendering our will so we can make better choices, returns our will to us in better condition than when we gave it away. In this, the Lord is able to purify our hearts so that we have less desire to sin until, eventually, the desire to sin is gone altogether.

King Benjamin also described an important part about the voice of our souls that comes from within. It is in our natures, particularly because of the needs of the human body, that our desires make us enemies to God. It’s not that we desire to fight him, but our bodies have divinely given desires that must be controlled. And, unless we listen to God, we can easily become pleasure-centric.

In his second letter to Timothy, the apostle Paul warned “that in the last days perilous times shall come,” and that men would be “lovers of their own selves” and “lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God.” (2 Timothy 3:1-4) In this sense, pleasure becomes a more inconspicuous form of idolatry where we choose something else to have greater priority in our lives than the true and living God. When desire is shrouded in the secrecy of our hearts, pleasure becomes the invisible focus of our worship. In that moment, pleasure becomes our God.

The researchers that Elder Ballard quoted further describe the important role of pleasure in our lives. Addressing the pleasure center in the brain, the researchers indicated that our “brains are wired to ensure that we will repeat life-sustaining activities by associating those activities with pleasure or reward. Whenever this reward circuit is activated, the brain notes that something important is happening that needs to be remembered, and teaches us to do it again and again, without thinking about it.” (Drugs, Brains, and Behavior – The Science of Addiction, NIDA, p. 18) If what these researchers have indicated is true, pleasure can be a powerful influence, regardless of whether good or bad.

References in scripture seem to indicate that pleasure is neither evidence of right nor wrong. It is merely a condition. Instead, pleasure is associated with both. “The Lord taketh pleasure in them that fear him….” (Psalms 147:11) When we are willing to put God first and temporarily give up the things that our bodies may need, then we will find pleasure in the day of our fasting. (Isaiah 58:3) This suggests that we may find greater pleasure by occasionally abstaining. The opposite is also true. “He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man,” (Proverbs 21:17) and, “she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth.” (1 Timothy 5:6) The prophet Jacob taught, “Remember, to be carnally-minded is death, and to be spiritually-minded is life eternal.” (2 Nephi 9:39)

The body alone is not capable of distinguishing between right and wrong. It does not recognize methods the way it does results. If a person is hungry, the body knows when it is fed and the need is met, but it does not care how the need was met. The body does not know if the food was a gift or if it was stolen. It does, however, acknowledge pleasure. When a need is met, the body experiences feelings of pleasure which teach us to repeat the action again and again. Herein lays a potential danger. Unless we understand what pleasure is and how it can help us, we can set ourselves up for unpleasurable experiences later on.

Too often, we allow ourselves to be deceived with regard to pleasure. If we do something we either know is wrong, or at least acknowledge that there is a possibility of being wrong, and then feel pleasure because a need was met, the body attempts to reinforce that behavior. Most often, this feeling of pleasure makes us feel very good. Bells ka-ching and lights start to bling, indicating that we have won the jackpot. At least that is what the carnally-centered body thinks. The best defense to being deceived is to be spiritually-centered instead. Deceiving ourselves with positive reinforcement for behavior that is not good makes it harder and harder to recognize and accept truth. It also makes it more difficult to repent, having convinced ourselves that we are not in error.

Because the body doesn’t acknowledge the methods by which our needs are met, pleasure alone is not a good indicator if something is right or not. It may indicate that the result is right, but it doesn’t justify intent. That requires the spirit. It is by the Spirit that we are justified. (Moses 6:60) When our bodies tell us that an action or decision is right and our spirits tell us the opposite, we are left feeling conflicted. Internally we experience chaos which remains until we can resolve our feelings and make them feel at one.

If we listen to our bodies and ignore our spirits, then the Holy Spirit will withdraw His help and influence, leaving us to our own persuasions. When this happens, we truly become an enemy to God. If instead we listen to our spirits when we receive spiritual promptings and we override the potential temptations of pleasure, we learn restraint and we keep ourselves from being deceived.

Because the soul is comprised of the spirit and the body, we can’t find true happiness by only listening to half of the story. Pleasure is only half of the equation that equals lasting happiness. If you can find pleasure and keep the influence of the Holy Spirit as a constant companion, then you will find the peace that comes by living a life that is consistent with truth. When we master our bodies, and our spirits and our bodies work together, it is then that we become more like God. We shouldn’t confuse the joy of the spirit with the pleasure of the body. It is important to learn the difference. They can be congruent, but are often not.

There is too much at stake to gamble with our salvation by trusting in pleasure alone. Pleasure can lead us to lasting happiness if it reinforces good behavior. When it reinforces bad behavior, it will lead us in the wrong direction. The numbers might line up if we are lucky, but that only works well in a casino. If our bodies truly are temples, then we need to make sure that they remain a place where our spirits can choose freely without deception. We need to be able to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit. Instead of reducing pleasure, this will allow us to experience more pleasure without the guilt. With a dose of restraint, we can learn to choose the will of God over a pleasure-centric life.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Voices

2010-10-03T21:40:00.001-06:00

Mindswept with noise and distraction,
Ubiquitous sounds that permeate and tangle my thoughts,
I savor the unique familiarity that calls my name
With resonant feeling,
Opening doors to things I once felt.

Today, I retrieve and gather
The seeming remnants of purpose that span forever,
Spoken with a soft and gentle voice,
A constant presence,
To find answers of hope and clarity.

Intently I listen to calming words,
Attempting to cut through the ever present raucous
That shrouds my understanding
In order to see
Things as they really are.

There is elegant beauty about the voice
Contrasting the sharp emptiness of what I know not
With understanding that lightly distills
On heart and soul,
Leaving lasting impressions.

Whether the voice of a dear friend, servant or Master,
I cherish the conversations that repeat greater meanings
Each in like pattern of that most familiar,
Still and small,
Voices within a voice.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Pointing the Way

2010-09-26T21:57:00.000-06:00

I think she was an angel, just a different sort. The woman had beautiful white hair and she was dressed completely in white to match. Were it not for the fact that I had just arrived at the temple, and that this is not an uncommon experience there, she might have given me enough reason to think she was a heavenly messenger. Instead, her life is still grounded by mortality and a desire to serve others.

Upon my entering the Salt Lake Temple, the woman in white greeted me. She stood waiting to point the way for me to go, wanting to make sure that my experience was as pleasant as possible. Though I have been to the temple many, many times and am quite familiar with finding my way, her presence provided a good reminder of what a difference one person can make in the experience of another. As I approached, she smiled and said hello. She made me feel welcome.

There are many who go to the temple for the first time, either to receive their own endowment, or because they have come from a far distance to visit a particular temple. Even in a place that is as holy and beautiful as a temple, one can feel a little disconcerted if he or she is not sure what to do or where to go. You may know that you are in the right place at the right time, but beyond that you might ask, “Now what?”

On any given visit to the temple, I may meet six or seven temple workers who are there just to greet me at various points. I have thought about how different my experience would be if they were not there. What would it feel like to be greeted by signs instead of a person? Would I feel more like a stranger in the Lord’s Holy House? Because the temple is the House of the Lord, signs are not enough. A house suggests hospitality. It is a place for family, friends, and warm welcomes. A home is a place of belonging.

As children of our Father in Heaven, we have all left our heavenly home for a time with the expectation of returning. In order to go back, we are required to demonstrate to Him that we really do want to – that we are willing to do anything to get there. While we are mere strangers here, this earth is intended to be our temporary home until we can again enter the presence of the Lord. It is the right place, and this is the right time to be tested. Though this is by design, signs from heaven may not be sufficient to make us feel welcome and comfortable for this earthly home that God has prepared for us. Someone who cares, standing at the crossroads of life’s decisions, can make all the difference in helping a fellow brother or sister to feel completely welcome.

Throughout my life there have been many individuals who have stood at the crossroads of my decisions, ready to greet me and offer some direction.
They have provided comfort just when it was needed most. Their experience has provided a sense of familiarity that I could not get on my own. Throughout my life I have relied heavily on my parents and family. My wife has supported me unlike anyone else in the world and has provided a spring of hope and encouragement. Close friends have been an invaluable blessing to me. At times when I have felt weakest, I have become much stronger as I have learned to depend on them. Those who are closest to me have greeted me with their hearts and have shaped who I have become. Without them, this life would not even closely resemble home.

There is great power in presence, and not just physical presence, but presence of heart and mind. Most often when I am going through a difficult change in my life, a friend may not be able to take the difficulty away. Doing so may actually defeat the purpose of being here on earth. The presence of a friend, however, seems to distribute the load that I carry in a way that is more bearable. It helps me to feel that I am not alone and allows me to focus on what I am supposed to learn instead of the difficulty of the moment.

Another presence that has shaped my decisions is that of the Holy Ghost. Similarly, the Holy Ghost won’t take away my challenges, but He will bring me comfort. His presence strengthens me. It inspires me to do great things. He helps me to believe that I can, and then He reminds me that I did, so I will have the faith to do it again.

Some of the most influential moments in my life have come when I have experienced the combined presence of those pointing the way – when I feel the warmth of those who are closest to me along with the presence of the Holy Ghost. The presence of God seems to cement any relationship. It amplifies and enriches. If a friend can do much to bring comfort, then a friend who brings the spirit with them can work miracles, and all just because of presence.

In life there are individuals, and even organizations, that are willing to point a direction, but they point the wrong way. Instead of pointing towards the happiness that comes from restraint and discipline, they are busy directing traffic towards selfish motives and gainful employment for the adversary. Occasionally, this comes from those who are well-intended and are not meaning to distract me. As comforting as it is to have the presence of friends, I am quick to see what friends they bring with them. Do they bring the spirit with them? Do they take the Holy Spirit as their guide? While a friend may not be able to receive revelation for me, I can judge the power of their presence by what I feel, and by how much I feel the power of the Holy Ghost.

There are individuals who do have the authority to receive revelation for me. I will never forget that my parents will always have that stewardship, and that I will do well to honor them in righteousness. Additionally, local priesthood leaders who hold priesthood keys have been called of God to guide me and point the way. I honor and respect them as I do my own parents. While neither my leaders nor my parents are perfect, I can judge the power of their presence by what I feel.

In a week from now, I will have the opportunity to be taught by other friends, most of whom I have not met. I call them friends because I feel they sincerely have my personal interests at heart. I have found them to be unwavering in their efforts to lead me to faith in Jesus Christ. They have been diligent in helping me to return to my home with Father. They are consistent in helping me to feel the Spirit of the Lord. These friends provide me good counsel and direction that enable me to make good decisions.

God speaks to living prophets today. They hear His voice in much the same way I do when I receive answers to my prayers. They hear His voice through the gentle promptings of the Holy Ghost. The presence of the comforter directs them to teach the things that Father wants us to be taught. That presence also confirms the truth of what we hear in our hearts.

The prophet Nephi taught that the will of God is “manifest unto the prophet by the voice of the Spirit; for by the Spirit are all things made known unto the prophets, which shall come upon the children of men according to the flesh… both temporal and spiritual….” (1 Nephi 22:2-3) Further he taught, “when a man speaketh by the power of the Holy Ghost the power of the Holy Ghost carrieth it unto the hearts of the children of men.” (2 Nephi 33:1)

The Lord also revealed to Joseph Smith, “Verily I say unto you, he that is ordained of me and sent forth to preach the word of truth by the Comforter, in the Spirit of truth, doth he preach it by the Spirit of truth or some other way? And if it be by some other way it is not of God. Therefore, why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth? Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together.” (Doctrine & Covenants 50:17-22)

What a blessing it is to receive personal revelation and learn how to communicate with God. What a gift it is to receive the Holy Ghost by receiving revelation.

During the times where we still feel alone, Father places others in our lives who can stand at the crossroads of difficult experiences. He provides family and friends who can help point the way. Their presence combined with the presence of the Holy Ghost can restore our faith and secure our hope. The signs of the second coming are increasing, but they may not be sufficient to bring us all the comfort we need. It is when I put my faith in those whom God has called to testify to His children that I find lasting peace. As I listen and affirm my willingness to yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, I find the strength to do the most difficult things. It is after those moments of trial, whether clear or ambiguous, that the confirming feeling of peace settles in my heart that Jesus lives and He will come again.

If you have not had a chance to listen to the words of living prophets and apostles, I invite you to join with me this next weekend in the General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to hear their words and judge for yourself the direction that they point. If you have listened to them before, then I invite you to listen again and again, and seek the confirming voice of the Holy Spirit that what they say is true.

I add my witness that God speaks to His children today. I know His servants the prophets speak His will. These are heavenly messengers, grounded to mortality through their service. As I listen to the Holy Spirit and follow, there is a peace that fills my heart unlike any other.

I am grateful for family, friends, and dearest loved ones who have been there for me during difficult times. They are the angels in my life who have pointed the way. You know who you are. Thank you!

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Someone To Talk To

2010-09-19T23:04:00.000-06:00

Having a friend to talk with can be a wonderful gift when you are going through a difficult trial. Quite often, it’s nice just to have someone who will simply listen so you don’t feel alone. Many of life’s difficulties become much easier to bear when there is someone else who is at least aware of what you are going through. Their prayers can make a big difference in helping to bear your burdens.

Just prior to the Savior’s most lonely moments, he met with his beloved apostles for the Last Supper. He knew the magnitude of the burden He would have to bear, and he chose to be with those who were closest to Him. There he called them “friends,” and said, “Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you….” (John 15:14-16) What a beautiful thing it is that Jesus would trust and confide in those who could give Him strength in his trials. I can think of no greater compliment than for the Lord to acknowledge me as His friend. I can only hope that someday I will have lived worthy enough to have such a privilege.

As the evening went on, Jesus described the difficulties that He would shortly face. He also told His apostles the difficulties they would face as His friends. Yet He promised them a gift for loving Him. “And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; Even the Spirit of truth … for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you. … Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:16-17, 27) Being a friend to Jesus is not an easy thing. It is sure to be difficult. During times of loneliness when our burdens seem greater than we can bear, I am grateful that He has promised to help us.

Recently, I experienced a difficult trial that weighed heavily on my heart. I felt that I was again riding upon the waves of a raging tempest, and the ups and downs seemed too hard to bear. What seemed worse was that I experienced a moment of ambiguity where I hoped to feel the influence of the Holy Spirit and did not. That influence had not left me, but I didn’t feel the clear direction that I had prayed for. Instead, I felt distance. I also found it very interesting that I did feel the promptings of the Holy Spirit in other matters, just not in that particular one. I believe I was being tested to see what I would do on my own.

I reflected on what Jesus did after the Last Supper as He went with His disciples to the Garden of Gethsemane. There he asked Peter, James, and John to watch and pray with Him. Sadly, in His time of need, they were not able to stay awake. Their own trials were bearing down on them and they could do nothing to help Him. It was in that moment of loneliness that Jesus called upon His Father in prayer and was strengthened by an angel who visited Him. Sometimes, when I need someone to talk to, and it seems there is nowhere else to turn, Father is always waiting to listen. I believe He gives us difficult experiences where no one else seems able to help because it causes us to turn to Him.

Earlier this year, I experienced similar trials where the ups and downs seemed unbearable. At times they felt like a rollercoaster of seismic activity. As that trial seemed to conclude I remember having the impression that the ups and downs of the previous year were just preparing me for another seismic event. I was being prepared for the next lesson. As I experienced a new set of ups and downs, I asked myself, “Is this it? Is this the culminating point of that impression?” I believe so. Remembering the impression didn’t take away the burden, but it did help to see that the Lord’s hand was in it and that I shouldn’t despair.

In the midst of the ups and downs, I found that I had emotional swings where I seemed to feel the spirit very clearly, alternating with moments of doubt and fog. On one particular morning a few weeks ago, there was an amazing thunder storm outside. I usually enjoy a good storm, but this time I felt different. Instead I felt great discouragement and despair. Things seemed very dark. I even felt as though I was encompassed about by the adversary, and I was troubled.

The next day I was still pondering the questions that had been on my mind, hoping for some answers. I ached. Before going to work, I stopped by a nearby cemetery to think and pray. That particular cemetery has been a good place for me to go when I need a few minutes of solitude – a place where I can eliminate distractions. I still felt confused about my direction. At times things seemed so clear, and then they would go foggy and not make as much sense. I was frustrated that I felt so distant from the spirit on this matter, that I was not receiving any revelation. That is when I began to pray.

As I sat in my car, I pled with Father to let me hear His voice again, or rather to have that familiar feeling that I am used to when I communicate with Him. I needed someone to talk to. As I did so, I felt the peace I was seeking return to my heart. I also had a reaffirmation that Father does hear and answer prayers.

I decided to test the pattern for receiving revelation, namely to study an issue out in my mind, come to a decision as to what was right, and then wait for the confirmation of the Holy Spirit. (Doctrine & Covenants 9:8) It is a simple process with many applications. Having faith in Jesus Christ is not just believing that He lived and that He will come again, it also includes having faith that what He said is true – true enough that it will work for me. This is what happened in my circumstance.

Pleading with Father, I asked a few questions and received some real time answers. It wasn’t like an audible voice. It was a very subtle feeling that I can never feel unless I am truly honest with myself and I have intent to learn and follow. The answers came as I asked the questions, tried to think what the correct answers might be, and then waited for the familiar feeling of the spirit to confirm or refute my thoughts.

In order to receive answers to prayer, I believe that the person praying has to believe, or at least have a hope, that Father does hear and answer prayers. He does so line upon line, and precept upon precept. This means that I may not receive the answers that I expect, but He will tell me just enough of what I need to know in order to complete my test.

As I asked my first question, “Am I wrong in my intent?” I thought in my mind that the answer was no. At the same time I felt the confirming peace in my heart that the impression was correct. I would have been uncertain had it not been for the familiarity of that peaceful feeling – a feeling that always comes when the Spirit of the Lord is near.

I then asked my second question, “Is my current course the right direction to continue in?” In my mind I thought yes, which again was confirmed by that peaceful feeling that comes from the Comforter. When I asked my third question, “Will my trial ever change?” I had a different thought that equated to, “John, that’s not for you to know right now. Be patient.” This, too, was accompanied by that familiar feeling. It wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear, but I knew it was right in my heart. It didn’t come in the form of words, but as I felt the meaning in the impression, those were the words that seemed most appropriate to dress the meaning in. As I did so, the Holy Ghost confirmed that the feeling was correct.

Two additional questions were answered for me that helped me to feel better about the moments of clarity I had felt before. When I felt surrounded by fog and despair, it was easy to question those moments of clarity and doubt that my prayers had really been answered. Some of the questions were difficult to ask, because I believed I would get an answer I didn’t want. I did, but I had to know. I needed to feel like I could progress again. There are a lot of things I have wanted in my life, but above all, when I have tried to make the right choice, things have always worked out for the best. Though I didn’t receive all the answers I wanted, and some of the answers were not what I had hoped for, my faith was enlarged by the fact that I needed someone to talk to, and Father heard.

There is a verse of scripture that is very familiar to me, and definitely a foundation for my faith. The apostle James taught, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.” (James 1:5-6)

In order to overcome my own tempest-tossed emotions, I had to stabilize my faith first, and put my trust in God. For me, that meant that I had to be willing to do whatever He wants me to do. If I can be completely honest with myself in that regard, then He can be honest with me.

Not all answers to prayer come instantaneously. Mine came after months of prayer, work, and pondering. Some take more time than others, and usually this has more to do with my own understanding. When I don’t get answers to the questions I ask in prayer, I try to examine why. If God reveals things to us line upon line, am I asking for an answer that requires me to skip several lines? Is there is a simpler question that is more pertinent to my current circumstance? If I can’t have the answer to why, then maybe I can at least get an answer to what I should do right now. Asking, “What would Thou have me do?” can help me sift through what I want in order to discover what God wants for me at that moment.

God’s purpose in testing us is to help us. So often it seems that needed help comes when I am about to give up but choose to hold on a little longer and rely on my faith. That’s when I receive my witness.

By the end of that day, other events occurred that were an answer to my morning prayer, as well as months of prayer. My trial had come to an end, or at least that part of my lesson was complete. I am sure I am only being prepared for the next test whenever it may be. But this much I know, each of us is given trials to test our faith. If it is my faith that is being tested, then it is my faith that I should apply as quickly as possible. Any delay that I exhibit may prolong my trial. But when I turn my heart to Father, I know that He hears and answers prayers.

Most importantly, I have again learned one of the many ways that Father will answer prayers. If we have the faith to study out a question and come to the best answer possible, He will send the Comforter to let us know if the path we are on is correct. Though we may each feel the Holy Spirit in a different way, the pattern is promised. We need not endure our own Gethsemane to be assured that God lives and that He hears and answers prayers. When we need someone to talk to, He is always listening.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

What Are You Feeling?

2010-09-12T22:46:00.000-06:00

This morning one of my favorite songs replayed in the background of my mind as I woke up and I was intrigued by a single line from the lyrics. The song written by Jack Murphy & Frank Wildhorn is called “Little Things,” and it got me thinking about sincerity. “It’s the honest way you ask how I’m feeling,” is a line in the song that suggests that some questions may be less ingenuous. It also suggests that our intent can be audible and recognizable in the way we say something. It’s not just what we say, but what we mean when we say it.

Despite my efforts to be considerate this morning, my “getting ready” routine disturbed my wife’s sleep and I woke her up. Before I kissed her goodbye I asked how she was feeling. I like to think that my concern for her was sincere. I hoped that she felt what I was feeling, which is a deep, deep love for her. Had I been less sincere, I could have asked the question with little intent to do anything. Since perfection is a quality I haven’t managed to wrangle yet, I hope the times I do so are at least few and far between.

I can think of a couple occasions this past week where I asked this same question of two other friends. The circumstances were quite different, but my sincerity was no less than when I spoke to my wife. I care deeply. My question of regard was offered with the hope that it would be received like it was in the song. More than a gesture of courtesy, it was offered as an act of friendship with real intent.

In most conversations that I have, the question, “How are you feeling?” seems to be more common than, “What are you feeling?” I wonder, culturally, if this is because feelings tend to be a little more private. The first question is a simple closed-ended question that is great for small talk. It can easily be answered with a reply of, “good,” or, “not so well,” end of story. The second question, however, may be a little more difficult.

Asking someone, “What are you feeling?” would imply that the person being asked is actually feeling something at the moment. The question would also presume that he or she would know exactly what they were feeling, which is often hard to do. Words seem to make more sense than emotions when we try to describe them, don’t you think? Perhaps the difficult part of this question is the position it puts the person in who is being asked. For instance, if someone asked you that question – a question which happens to be more open-ended – you are forced to make a decision. Do I want to share what I am feeling, or should I say, “it it’s none of your business?” Suddenly the person being asked is put on the spot to make a judgment call of what is too personal and what is not. When feelings and emotions are hard enough to decipher inside your head, having to account for it on the outside can be even more troubling. Agreed? Then, let’s take a closer look at the first question.

Most of the time when I ask, “How are you feeling?” my intent is to know, “Are you well,” or “Are you feeling better?” The question seems most appropriate when the outward appearance is less than obvious, or when the person I am talking to is obviously not feeling as well as he or she could. There are outward indicators that things could be better, if only by a little. Even in these instances, my concern for a friend is generally about their physical feelings, or their emotional feelings. I think, in all reality, there should be a greater concern for spiritual feelings.

Here’s another potentially awkward moment. What if the question, “How are you feeling?” was not intended to be lightly conversational. Another for-instance, what if the person doing the asking meant, “How is your ability to feel?” “Are you capable of feeling spiritual things?” “Do you know how to recognize the promptings of the Holy Ghost when they come?” “Do you… .” Anyway, you get the idea. Suddenly small talk turns in to an interrogation, and the second question by comparison doesn’t look so bad. Talk about awkward. Is it too late to switch questions? If someone asks, “What are you feeling,” I can at least answer, “I’m not sure,” and be completely honest.

The reality of the matter is that most people who believe in inspiration from the Holy Ghost are often unclear about what the inspiration means. Yes, I receive inspiration through my thoughts and feelings, but I don’t always know for sure if it is inspiration or not. I’m not always certain about the meaning or if I am reading my own biases into it. Sometimes it is as though I feel something that might actually mean something, but I’m not sure. Now I’ve gone from feeling awkward to frustrated. What is worse is when I have to make a decision that feels time-sensitive, meaning, I don’t have time to sit and wait around for a sign from heaven. That’s probably a good thing because those signs seldom come.

Choosing to ask myself these same questions in the privacy of my own mind may not be the most comfortable pastime, but it is better than experiencing feelings of doubt when I am in the middle of a crisis and I am in need of heavenly help. I would rather answer questions when I have a comfortable amount of time to do so. Then I can feel better about how I am feeling and what I am feeling. I believe that each of us experience moments of clarity and moments of ambiguity. Separating what we know from what we don’t know can provide a good start.

Moments of clarity for me include those times when I either feel the presence or absence of the Holy Spirit strongly, and I know why. While I am not perfect, there are times that I feel the witness of the Holy Ghost that I am at least worthy, that my efforts to do what God wants have been accepted. I haven’t arrived yet, but I am moving in the right direction. I feel at peace as I feel the presence and influence of the Comforter. That is a wonderful feeling to experience on occasion.

There are other times when I know I feel the spirit, but I don’t feel the peaceful confirmation that I am doing the right thing. Instead I am being reprimanded or chastised. I don’t have to commit a serious sin, I just have to do something that is wrong and the Holy Ghost will warn me of the error I have just made. His influence may not leave, but I have the warning that it will if I don’t correct my mistake and turn my heart to God. Very often, this subtle feeling is no more than a hunch. It’s as though the good feeling I had is diminished but with the option to have it back should I make the right choice. If I am not sincere, and do not have real intent, it will be very apparent to God how I am feeling about His promptings. If I persist in thinking that my way is better and I don’t give heed to the prompting, I start to diminish in my ability to feel spiritual things. This either leads to a moment of ambiguity or the last moment of clarity.

This last moment of clarity I have experienced comes when I have deliberately made the wrong choice. I knew it and I did what I wanted anyway. In those moments, I have felt the influence of the spirit leave and I am left alone because I was prideful or rebellious. In those moments, I knew it, and it was clear. Those are very uncomfortable moments, but they are still a gift when they help me to change.

Separating what you know from what you don’t know before you get to a crisis, not only helps organize your understanding, it can also provide some patterns that may help sort out the times that are less clear. The similarities between these moments of clarity and ambiguity may give enough reason to have a little more faith when we don’t know for sure.

I believe a very common moment of ambiguity is when a person receives inspiration and doesn’t realize it. If the gift of the Holy Ghost is intended to be a constant influence and companion, I do not doubt that someone who is living a Christ-like life is constantly benefiting from inspiration. Just because I don’t recognize it doesn’t mean that I am not receiving it. I would like to be better at recognizing those subtle promptings for what they are so I can include my gratitude for them in my prayers of thanks. I find the more I look the more I find. Watching helps, but I am often uncertain.

Another moment of ambiguity is very similar, when I think I have received some sort of inspiration but I am not positive what the feeling means. I have a hunch that I am supposed to do something, but I am not exactly sure what, and I’m not exactly sure why. It is just a simple hunch accompanied by somewhat familiar feeling.

The moment of ambiguity that I am most familiar with is when I am seeking inspiration and I don’t feel like I am getting what I need. I hope for guidance and all I feel is uncertainty. In those moments, it is as though I am surrounded by a fog. I wrestle in prayer and I don’t feel like I get any closer to an answer. I am left to my own strength for a time, wondering if my fog is a consequence of my own behavior. I think this is the most difficult ambiguity because it is the one where I feel the most alone – I feel as though I am going through a trial by myself. To some degree this is true.

In this last case, it helps to remember that God has promised not to leave those who are faithful. Rather, He has promised to prepare the way before us, to support us in our trials, and bear us up in our afflictions. Just because we can’t see it doesn’t mean that He is not doing it. This requires a greater demonstration of faith on our part. I believe it is in this moment of ambiguity where we experience the greatest potential for personal growth. This is where many of my personal tests can be found. Anticipating this will help prepare our minds and our hearts to be tested.

When I feel that the influence of the Holy Spirit has left me alone, the first thing I do is a safety check. It’s like putting on your seat belt as soon as you get into a car. It becomes a habit. If I feel the absence of that peaceful comforting feeling, the first thing I do is ask myself, “Have I done something that would cause the spirit to withdraw?” Remember, to keep the spirit with us always requires a willingness to remember the teachings of Jesus and to follow Him. We don’t have to be perfect, we just have to be willing and worthy. This says more about where our hearts are pointed than where they are at. If I don’t feel that I have been deliberately rebellious, I move to the next step in my safety check.

At times when I feel alone because I do not feel the spirit close to me, the next condition I check is to see if I feel discouraged. There is a big difference between feeling down and discouraged and feeling guilty because we know we have done something wrong. If I have done something wrong, the spirit will usually help me to see the problem. Occasionally I will feel down and discouraged, not because the Lord feels I have done something wrong, but because I haven’t achieved the expectations I have set for myself. It is not uncommon to be harder on yourself than others would. We simply can’t do everything all at once, and it isn’t required. King Benjamin taught, “it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength.” (Mosiah 4:27)

I have learned that the Holy Ghost is consistent. When I feel the spirit, I always feel uplifted and edified. Even when I have done something wrong, and I am chastened by the Holy Spirit, His influence will guide me to see a way out. He always directs me upward. The Lord told Joseph Smith, “And now, verily, verily, I say unto thee, put your trust in that Spirit which leadeth to do good—yea, to do justly, to walk humbly, to judge righteously; and this is my Spirit. Verily, verily, I say unto you, I will impart unto you of my Spirit, which shall enlighten your mind, which shall fill your soul with joy; And then shall ye know, or by this shall you know, all things whatsoever you desire of me, which are pertaining unto things of righteousness, in faith believing in me that you shall receive.” (Doctrine & Covenants 11:12-14)

If I have passed the rebellious check, and I am not feeling guilty because I have been chastened by the spirit, I proceed to the next safety check: How is my faith? It is my experience that the spirit will leave if we have done something to offend God, or if we have ignored his subtle promptings. There may be times that we don’t feel the spirit as strongly because our desires, appetites, and passions are screaming louder and we give deference to them. But if I am trying to do what is right, and I still don’t feel the spirit, I find that my ambiguity is about to get clearer. The key comes down to a couple of simple keys that were illustrated in the song I woke up to. It’s in the honest way I ask myself how I am feeling. Am I being sincere when I say that I am trying to do what is right? Do I have real intent to follow God? Is there anything I have overlooked that is blocking my faith? When I am truly honest with God, He is more open with me.

Most of the time when I feel ambiguous about where I stand with God, or I wonder why I haven’t felt his Holy Spirit as well as at other times, it is because I am in the middle of a test, and I am about to finish. It is often at the moment when I feel I can’t go any longer or any further that a change begins to happen. It is in the moment when I am willing to submit my will to God and do whatever He wants that my tests usually resolve and I gain understanding. Moroni taught, “for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.” (Ether 12:6)

Moroni also taught, “I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things.” (Moroni 10:4-5)

Our intent is very recognizable to God in the way we offer our prayers. It’s not just what we say, but what we mean when we say it. He knows what we need before we even ask. He also knows what will help us the most. Even when we feel we have learned what we need to in a trial, God knows best. He has prepared lessons that are specifically tailored to save His children. Just because we don’t understand doesn’t mean we should doubt. As we put our faith in Him, he will not fail us, but will stay with us until we make it home.

So what is it I am feeling? That is really up to me to determine for myself. However the pattern that God has given us is that the Holy Spirit will guide us when we are faithful. If we are consistent in following Him, He will provide moments of clarity amidst the moments of ambiguity. It may not be enough to know for a certainty all the things we want to know, but it will be enough to help us to have faith in Him. Once we do that, and once we learn how to recognize the influence of His Holy Spirit when it is present, then we can feel much better about any trial we are asked to pass through.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Trials Felt

2010-09-05T19:35:00.003-06:00

How appears the apparition, that seemingly passes by,
To others who look and cannot see the reasons why I cry?
Its verity feels like bedrock, a forever burden borne,
With weight’s encumbrance given to bear alone and lorn.

In the middle of my own, I see another’s fear,
But not the force that’s hidden, causing him to veer.
I watch as burden buries heart, not knowing how long he’ll wait,
Or just how much the toll exacts to pass through sorrow’s gate.

Often worse are trials which, for others, go unseen,
For few will pause to help and answer what they mean.
I wish to see differently when the trial is not my own.
Perhaps I, too, can share his burden so he is not alone.

If I look past apparent, and the apparition that is bleak,
I hope to find more knowledge and gain the peace I seek.
Whether trial by fire or endless dark, it’s time I wait upon,
To learn the lessons that I need, and then my trials are gone.

Trials give us focus, when there’s nothing else to see,
Until we look right through them to what we’re meant to be.

A Sound Marriage (or, More Thoughts on Differences)

2010-08-29T22:47:00.000-06:00

I can’t think of “making beautiful music together” without remembering Looney Tunes’ Pepe Le Pew from Saturday morning cartoon fame. Growing up, I watched this ill-fated skunk continually look for a willing recipient of his devotion and passion. Quite often it was a black cat with a white stripe painted down her back by some unfortunate mistake, causing Pepe to think that she was his perfect match. Sadly, his reek was a difficult difference to get over. Regardless of how good his intentions were, he seldom had any success in his relationships of devotion.

Many couples face the same challenge as Pepe, especially after they have been married for some time. In most marriages, the challenges are not one sided. Each partner may have a difference that the other has to manage. At the risk of being cliché, I hope to share some additional thoughts about marriage, differences, and music. The notion of making music together in a marriage has merit, especially when we consider the theory behind both music and marriage.

Some things sound good, and some things are sound. While similar words are used to describe a particular quality, they may not describe the same relationship. Occasionally I will hear of a marriage that sounds like it may not last. In a few instances the opposite is true – the relationship sounds too good to be true. What truly makes a difference is not what I hear, but how sound the relationship really is.

Even if you don’t consider yourself a musician, you may be more of a musician than you think if you have learned how to manage differences in your relationship. If the opposite is the case, here is some theory that might help.

Unison
Singing in unison is one of the most common expressions of music. Not everyone plays a musical instrument, but I personally don’t know anyone who can’t sing a round of “Happy Birthday” on occasion. Most people know the melody and will join in the celebration of a friend or family member without much coercion. Culturally, it’s just what we do. It’s expected. Singing the same notes as someone else is the easiest way to express music together.

In marriage, being on the same page, or in agreement, is also what we expect culturally. It is beautiful when two people make a decision to follow a certain path and stay together in a long-term commitment. They find a way to sing the same notes by spending time and sharing things in common with each other. Not only do they live together and love together, they make a commitment to work out their differences, for better or worse. The happiest and healthiest marriages I have seen are usually a result of two people who are willing to put self as a second priority to their marriage. There is a great deal of unison in their lives.

Harmony
Having sung in numerous choirs throughout my life, I love harmony. I love the fact that multiple individuals can sing different parts to contribute to an overall effect. As varying musical notes are arranged to compliment each other, they create chords that blend and sound good. The result is harmonious and pleasing. Combined, the various notes are able to create a richer and fuller effect than can be achieved by singing in unison alone. Some harmonies are tight, and others are loose. Different methods are employed by composers to achieve different effects.

Harmony in marriage is easiest to achieve when a couple blends their efforts for a common purpose. Recognizing that we can have unity without requiring each other to sing in unison can provide richer experiences. In this instance, differences of taste, interest, and opinion, can provide more opportunity to experience all the good that life has to offer. Each person can then share the parts their spouse may be most interested in. They key is to make sure that there is a consistent melody to blend with. Common goals, balanced effort, and the opportunity to share and exchange are critical to making a marriage work.

As other parts are added to the marriage duet – and this may be the inclusion of children, other family members, or even close friends – the key to maintaining a harmonious marriage relationship is to stick with your melody. A melody in this case may simply be the decision to get married and be faithful. If another part of your life becomes so dominant that the melody is no longer recognizable, the ability to sing in harmony is left up to chance. That is a precarious place for a marriage to be, and it could jeopardize the relationship. On the other hand, what an incredible experience it is when multiple parts are combined to emphasize the beautiful melody of a sound marriage. As these parts compliment the musical theme, they can further enhance a marriage that might be strong on its own.

Symphony
In the case of a symphonic orchestra, an elaborate composition of three or more movements is performed by a large number of string, wind, and percussion instruments. Each group of instruments will typically have a different role to play in the composition. The violins will play different notes than the cellos or basses. Their rhythm may also be different. Flutes, trumpets, and clarinets offer a different feel and mood than the stringed instruments. The addition of a piano, drums, and cymbals can add energy and emphasis to a strong musical theme. Alone, they would not accomplish the same result, but together they portray a story with broader range and depth.

Outside relationships can also have a profound effect on the success of a marriage. While these also add depth and energy, a symphony requires a conductor to lead, pace, and keep a good balance. In this instance, a musical theme is more important than a single melody. Life becomes more and more complicated as I introduce other parts and instruments to my life. In order to keep proper balance, I rely heavily upon my conductor to lead me. God is our conductor. He is always willing to direct us if we will watch and follow.

Dissonance vs. Cacophony
Some of my favorite music has parts that aren’t very harmonious. The music has character, depth, and feeling, but it doesn’t always make me happy. Sometimes the music doesn’t seem either comforting or pleasing. Instead it is dissonant. Chords seem incongruous; they lack agreement or consistency, or they are harsh and unsettling. In a musical composition, this is often used to create certain moods, or a deliberate tension that builds just before resolution. The dissonance can last for a few notes, or for an entire movement. The use of major and minor keys can influence the way we feel about a musical theme, as well as aid in telling a story. Without some sort of resolution to compare the dissonance with, it may be mistaken for cacophony.

I don’t know that I would recommend looking for dissonance in a marriage relationship on purpose. Differences seem plentiful enough without having to look for more. At the same time, I don’t know that I would fear the music, just because a few measures are incongruous or unsettling. Dissonance in marriage doesn’t mean that the marriage is bad or failing. It simply means the relationship is in some need of resolution. My resolution has more to do with me being resolute in sticking to my melody or musical theme than it does with having a perfect marriage. Yes, dissonance may have an associated mood that is hard to overcome, that is unless there is a conscious effort to resolve differences.

As a couple works through their issues of dissonance, something is needed to bring them back together again. Singing in unison is one way to do this. The results are easier to predict when a couple is doing the same things together. This may be especially helpful when partners want to fix their problems, but smaller efforts haven’t seemed to work. In many cases, however, unison may not be required. Mere acknowledgement of the melody or musical theme may be enough to get the couple back in harmony. A decision of what key to perform in will help. If one partner is playing a major key, and having a very positive experience, while the other is playing a minor key and is not receiving the same benefit, dissonance will turn to distance until the matter is resolved. Failure to be resolute in keeping covenants or commitments of loyalty will leave the couple in a state of cacophony.

Fidelity
Some musical performances are worth repeating again and again. Back by popular demand, a musician may repeat a show, or the performance may be recorded so that it can be enjoyed as often as a listener wants to play it. Fidelity in this sense refers to the quality of the recording, or the degree of accuracy to which the recording reflects the original performance. If the sound quality is diminished, there is less fidelity in the recording. If the best instruments and tools are used to record the performance, the music can achieve high fidelity. Hi-fi performances are much more valuable than music that diminishes over time.

A married couple looking for ways to create a hi-fi marriage would do well to employ the best instrument possible, namely the heart – the truer the heart, the greater fidelity in marriage. Strict observance of covenants, not just in actions, but also in intent, will help a couple to remain faithful to their original commitments of marriage. It will help them stay true to the feelings and emotions that brought them together in the first place.

Prior to the advent of the digital age, analog recordings could be damaged and altered if a record was scratched or a cassette tape was stretched. The music was no better than the means to record it. Similarly, marriage is no better than our methods to protect it and maintain its definition. Remaining loyal to our initial commitment and investment of marriage is a choice. If we maintain our choice each day, keeping it free from scratches or distortion, it will not only retain its value, it will increase in value because that kind of fidelity is less and less common in society.

Fidelity in this case does not only refer to sexual purity, but purity of thought, and intent. If covenants are made to honor, support, and love a marriage partner with a fullness of heart, anything that diminishes that level of commitment also diminishes the fidelity of that marriage. Alternates and substitutes can begin to eclipse the marriage relationship which result in distortion and failed fidelity, even when no serious transgressions are evident.

In some cases, the original commitment of marriage may seem damaged beyond repair. A weakened relationship may require re-mastering to get back to the original quality. There are ways to fix these types of challenges, but it requires the efforts of both marriage partners to accomplish. Usually it also requires a deep faith in God, and a willingness to include Him in maintaining the relationship as well. With God, nothing shall be impossible.

The pursuit of high fidelity requires an honest look at the influences we allow into our lives. Simply put, differences, interests, or outside influences that detract from or weaken a marriage relationship keep that most important relationship from being what it could be. While it may not be wrong, it prevents the married couple from having high fidelity and limits the potential of the relationship. In contrast, outside influences that improve a marriage relationship could also be deemed to improve fidelity. A couple seeking a celestial marriage with eternal increase should not settle for an acceptable relationship. Their goal should be higher, always looking for ways to improve their fidelity at greater and greater levels.

I believe it is important to maintain a constant evaluation of your marriage. Some relationships only sound good, and some relationships are sound. Part of being sound is being true – true to each other and true to your covenants. A sound marriage is one where both partners work through differences in marriage by finding ways to return to each other. It’s all about sticking to your melody and maintaining high fidelity. Finding ways to stay true to the theme you started with makes the best music.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

What's the Difference?

2010-08-23T09:17:00.003-06:00

Marriage was the main topic du jour recently as I sat in a small park with a friend. We had found a comfortable place to discuss an aspect that is sometimes a little uncomfortable. He described the memories he was happiest with in his marriage, as well as parts that were troubling. Most of these were needs-based. Sounds like most marriages, right? Occasionally the sweet is mixed with a little bitter? As he talked about his interests, and how he and his wife differed on several points, I recognized some familiar themes.

This conversation caused me to reflect on an old TV commercial from my childhood. A well known soft drink company advertised a simple taste test to help sell their product. The comparison of two different drinks required a taster to determine which drink was preferred based on taste alone. Though one drink may have tasted better than the other, I think the commercial was a bit biased as it highlighted the results favoring the soft drink paying for the commercial. Though expected, the bias is not very helpful if you are trying to improve a marriage. It’s really helpful to have both perspectives.

While I feel I have a great marriage, Liz and I also have some differences that are pretty common in most marital relationships. When taste testing our personal differences, I find that some of our differences taste good and some don’t. Many of our differences are so small it’s hard to tell the difference at all. We simply have the same taste, or you might say we just have a lot in common. Most of the time, this works to our advantage.

In a few cases, our personality traits are so varied that the differences are stark. If we are not careful, these differences can result in a contest to see which trait tastes better, or which one will come out as a dominant factor in making decisions for the two of us. I like to think that we take turns winning, or conceding, but you’ll have to confirm that with Liz. So I ask myself, if some differences are good and some are not, what’s the difference? I think the answer is worth digging a little deeper for. There is a difference between our differences and the way we perceive them.

As I look at my relationship with my wife, I find that our strengths are quite often weaknesses, too. In reality, they are just traits that define who we are, each one with its own set of pros and cons. For example, Liz and I are both quite methodical and organized, which makes us very compatible as we solve problems together. Yet when we look at the detail of how we approach a problem, our differences become more apparent. Liz tends to be more logical and rational. I tend to be more intuitive. I’ve noticed that these personality traits also affect how we react to circumstances when our needs aren’t met. We each get grumpy, jealous, and dissatisfied for different reasons. Quite often, Liz’s reasons are more logical and mine are more emotional. How’s that for a stereotypical gender switch? If we are not careful, it is easy to miss each other’s needs because they are different than our own.

No matter how similar we are, or how similar our needs are, we are still different people with different experiences. Our roles, activities, and choices shape who we are as well as our needs. In addition to eating and sleeping, we each have interests that fuel us and give us energy. Finding room in our lives for some of these things is in keeping with the Thirteenth Article of Faith. “If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” (The Articles of Faith 1:13) I believe there is a lot of latitude here for personal interests.

While Liz and I spend time together, more regularly in the early morning and in the evening, our focus during the daytime is often quite different. Liz has a degree in Elementary Ed and spends more time volunteering in our children’s school classes. She takes a greater role in their education and extra curricular activities than I do. My background, on the other hand, is in art and design and I spend most of my time during the day developing architectural designs for various buildings.

As might be expected, many of our personal interests are related to the things we do most during the daytime. Liz enjoys sewing and is an excellent seamstress. She also loves scrapbooking. In my spare time, I find other creative outlets such as fine art and music. I also love running. While there are similarities to our favorite pastimes, and we are both project-oriented individuals, our projects and interests are often very different. As we gain more and more experience in our interests over time, it would seem that our interests could take us further and further apart. Yikes!

These simple differences can seem much greater when a couple fails to understand each other’s needs, especially those deeper than pastimes. I recently spoke with a couple who was having some challenges in their marriage. One was looking for more of an intellectual and emotional connection. The other was craving more expression of love through touch and affection. The couple had a difficult time relating to each other and their differences were growing. Sadly, neither of the two understood the other’s needs well enough to help. They were only getting one perspective on the taste test.

I find it interesting that the adage, “opposites attract,” is often true, but not always. There are enough instances to prove otherwise. Some opposites such as gender are very attractive. We each have talents and experience that compliment each other, which in turn enriches a relationship. On the other hand, differences such as work ethic, spending habits, and favorite pastimes may detract from and even divide a relationship, especially if they are not managed.

Whether you have a fairly strong marriage or one that is feeling pretty rocky, taking a closer look at differences in marriage can make all the difference in how you perceive your relationship. Expecting a mixture of similarities and differences is not only healthy, it’s realistic. It’s important to note that some differences are attractive and some are divisive. Some are complimentary and some are competing. But it’s not the difference alone that makes the difference. There is something about similarities and differences that make them positive or negative.

Beyond similarities and differences lies a deeper issue, namely, attraction. If we are attracted to a similarity or difference, we move closer to it. As this happens we are more likely to adopt and become like the trait that attracts us. What makes some traits attractive and others not? What type of incentives does it take to make a stronger relationship? An obvious conclusion is a clear benefit.

Quite often we see differences as good when there is a potential for some gain or opportunity. I can’t say I know anyone who develops a friendship so they can experience loss, or gets married so they can be miserable. Most relationships are based on some mutual benefit. In a marriage I believe the benefit needs to go both ways. The benefit may not need to be the same, but it should be mutual and proportionate.

Similarities are attractive for obvious reasons. Finding someone who thinks like you, acts like you, and feels like you is very validating. It feels good to know that someone else can relate. I don’t feel lonely or isolated when someone else thinks like I do. It adds strength to my resolve and passion to my interests. In this case, the greater the similarities, the greater the attraction.

Differences can be attractive for similar reasons. Finding someone who thinks like you, but knows more than you, can be uplifting and encouraging. Sharing with someone who thinks like you, but has found a different way to express it, can be inspiring. I am grateful for friends who can do more than I can when they are willing to teach me a new skill. I am enthused by others who can do something I can’t when I can also see the opportunity for personal growth.

When I am fearful of differences, it is usually for selfish reasons, or because I am feeling a need to be protective. Finding someone who thinks like I do, and who has the potential to take something I have worked hard for, can be terrifying. Sharing my opportunities with someone who may use them against me is threatening. I am leery of differences that could result in undesirable change or loss.

I also believe there are times we should be fearful of differences in marriage. These instances have everything to do with the heart and intent. Differences of themselves are nothing. It is only what we make of the differences or what we do with them that makes them good or bad. If a difference in interest, opinion, or want gains enough importance that my marriage relationship begins to decrease in priority then I am on dangerous ground. Such differences create unnecessary distance between a married couple. As that distance increases it becomes harder and harder to repair; thus the council from the Lord to love and cleave unto your spouse and none else. (Doctrine & Covenants 42:22)

The safest way I have determined to evaluate differences in marriage is to ask a few simple questions. Will this difference make me a better person? Am I being selfish, or is this something that will help me to accomplish more good? Will this difference strengthen my marriage or weaken it? Does my spouse agree with me?

Earlier I suggested that there is a difference between our differences and the way we perceive them. Understanding this can help us to manage all of our differences in marriage. As I have looked closer, here is what I have found:

We each decide whether differences will be attractive or divisive. It is a personal choice. No one decides that for us.
Differences can be managed with mutual understanding and cooperation. Both spouses can shape whether or not their differences will be divisive by having a common focus. Making sure that each other remains the primary focus in the relationship, and not their differences, will help increase their unity.
Taste is a personal preference, and our taste can change. Some differences can be an acquired taste. Trying to understand our spouse’s perspective gives us a taste of who they really are. We don’t have to swallow everything, but a taste of something else that is good might open our hearts as well as our minds, especially when it comes to understanding each other’s needs.
Differences are less dangerous when we are less selfish. The more I can move the focus from me to we, and still have my basic needs met, the more I become like the Savior.
Overcoming our differences can be different than overcoming weaknesses. We may not need to get rid of our differences to overcome them. When we struggle to work through our differences, and we feel that we are making no progress, Father in Heaven is always willing to help if we turn to Him in prayer. This works best when we first turn our hearts.

There is one crowning principle pertaining to differences that will help us become more like the Savior. We are all members in the body of Christ. We have differences that make us stronger. The key is to make sure that our covenant relationships stay intact and preeminent.

The apostle Paul taught, “For as the body is one, and hath many members, and all the members of that one body, being many, are one body: so also is Christ. … For the body is not one member, but many. … And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? … But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. And if they were all one member, where were the body? But now are they many members, yet but one body. … God hath tempered the body together, having given more abundant honour to that part which lacked: That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another. And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it. Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular.” (1 Corinthians 12:12-27) Paul then talks about gifts of the spirit, and of charity.

The Lord also revealed, concerning His gifts, "that ye may not be deceived seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given; For verily I say unto you, they are given for the benefit of those who love me and keep all my commandments, and him that seeketh so to do; that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me, that ask and not for a sign that they may consume it upon their lusts. And again, verily I say unto you, I would that ye should always remember, and always retain in your minds what those gifts are, that are given unto the church. For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God. To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby. ... He that asketh in the Spirit asketh according to the will of God; wherefore it is done even as he asketh. And again, I say unto you, all things must be done in the name of Christ, whatsoever you do in the Spirit; And ye must give thanks unto God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with." (Doctrine & Covenants 46:8-12, 30-32)

Jesus is our head. As we take direction from Him, He will lead us back to the Father. If we are honest in our efforts to do so, the Holy Ghost will teach us how. The Holy Ghost will also sanctify our hearts and remove the impurities that make us selfish if we will yield to His enticings. As we choose to honor our covenants, and honor our spouses whom we have made those covenants with, then we will learn how to make our differences become attractive. We will find that we have more in common then than we did before.

Understanding these principles is a lot different than understanding our differences in marriage. For those seeking a celestial marriage, we should expect to be tested in all things, even in matters of taste. There is a difference between being one and being the same. I’m much happier when I understand the difference.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Sticks, Balloons, and Hang Man

2010-08-16T00:27:00.002-06:00

This morning I compared two different messages presented in sacrament meeting as I sat in church with my family. The first came from the pulpit. A member of the high council had been asked to address the topic of “What would Jesus do?” The second message was being delivered simultaneously by my oldest son and oldest daughter who were sitting just to my right. Together they were irritating each other by drawing stick figures on the back of the folded meeting program. Oddly, the graphic representation looked nothing like the message from the pulpit. Yeah, big surprise, I know. Welcome to parenting.

I’m not exactly sure of the sequence of events that escalated the family feud on a pew, but from what I am able to reconstruct, it happened like this. My daughter asked my wife for a pen so she could keep herself entertained after the sacrament had been passed. Having received said pen, or weapon as it were, she began to draw. Seeing that my daughter was having a good time, my son thought he would contribute some of his own creativity to her illustration of what I thought was an interesting and well delivered message from the assigned speaker. I suspect that my son may have briefly commandeered both the paper and the pen to make his move.

I observed as one stick figure was added to the other and the two figures began to have a conversation. Remarks were ballooned adjacent to their heads like you would see in a comic strip. A nice volley developed as balloons began to fill the page and I could tell there was a little heat coming from the paper. Well, he said this and she said that, and before you know it, someone had a weapon. I don’t know if the potato gun came first or if it followed another weapon of choice, but shortly after the exchange went from words to weapons, there were a large number of other stick figures who appeared on the scene. The new mob, which appeared to have been drawn by my son, led to cartoonish cannons and shoulder mounted fire arms that resembled bazookas. A few more remarks were ballooned on the page, and then some of the remarks escaped the drawing and came from the author’s mouths. Those balloons weren’t so visible, but their emotions were. “Hmmm,” I thought. This is interesting.

I don’t know that either of my children was necessarily guilty or innocent. They just were. They were my children and they did what siblings do best – they annoyed each other relentlessly. “Nice,” I thought. Here I am being inspired and the two of you are blowing each other up.

The little feud drew to a close as my daughter, bound and determined not to be outsmarted by her older brother, was fired upon by her father. She had just drawn an even larger cannon with two more stick figures. The figure at whom the cannon was pointed at was labeled as my son. The figure adjacent to the lit fuse was labeled so that I knew it was her. I could tell that the look on her face was not deliberately maniacal, but it was the look of, “Now I’ve got you! Take that!!” That’s when I asked if I could see the folded paper and I added a third label. I simply wrote, “Jesus,” off to the side and handed it back to her.

My daughter’s expression of accomplishment deflated like a balloon without any remarks left to hold the air in. She’s pretty bright and she got the message without me having to add another balloon. She sagged a little and then started to repair things. Before the cannon had a chance to fire at said brother and recipient of focused animosity, she intervened and protected his stick figure by building a wall in front of him. She then cut the fuse to the cannon with a pair of newly drawn scissors. In a manner of speaking, she saved the day. Having three people in the picture made all the difference, at least for her.

I don’t know that either she or her brother had listened to much of the talk, but she and the speaker came to the same conclusion – when we keep Jesus in our lives it affects all of our decisions and leads us to greater happiness. If we let Him, He will show us to a better way. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)

This little exchange led me to think of another lonely, solitary stick figure of a man. I am thinking specifically of a simple game of hang man. Perhaps I assume too much if I believe that most people reading this post have played this game at some point, likely when a beloved Primary teacher or Sunday School teacher was absent and another poor, unsuspecting soul was asked to substitute at the last minute. How many times have you been in such a position and had to punt for a lesson, hmmm? Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me. All the same, the poor little guy who is the object of the game did nothing more than you by showing up to class, and yet he becomes a victim of a unique type of abuse, namely a lack of communication.

In case you haven’t ever had to punt for a lesson, and you have not yet felt the magic of relating to this nostalgic example, let me briefly sum up the rules of the game. One person has something on their mind. In an attempt to be obvious, they give a clue that “something is up” by drawing a hangman’s noose and by drawing a line. In reality, they draw several lines that represent the letters of a word that they are thinking. That is the signal that they game has begun. Then it is the job for the other person, or persons, to guess what is on the mind of the person who provided the noose. Correct guesses allow appropriate letters to be filled in above the lines, saving our little bystander for another round. Incorrect guesses send our little friend in a sticky situation to the gallows where he his hung because someone couldn’t guess what someone else was thinking. Great game don’t you think?

How often do we draw a line on the ground, taking a position of defense, and then expect the person we are having a disagreement with to discern what we are thinking without any additional information. “Someone is going to hang for this, and it’s not going to be me,” is something that goes unsaid but seems to be implied when we play this game. It is also often followed by mobs and weapons, even if only on the stage in our minds.

A close friend of mine said she prefers not to play these kind of games. “No subtexts, please. If there is something you want to tell me, just say it. I don’t want to guess.” Knowing this type of openness was welcome helped me to be even more honest than I was before. I have tried to apply this principle in every aspect of my life, and I am finding it works.

In light of these examples, another set of stick figures comes to mind. They are everywhere. Perhaps you have seen them most recently traveling on the rear of a vehicle with tinted glass. Usually there are two larger stick figures positioned on the rear window that represent a mom and a dad. Then there are a varying number of smaller figures that follow which often represent children. I have also seen a number of dogs join the procession, and one car that had several bicycles that followed. To each, his or her own, I guess. The point that I would like to make is that the stick figures all seem to be happy. No one is firing cannons or bazookas. No one is getting hung. For some reason, everyone on the rear of the vehicle seems to be onboard with the idea that a family is a pretty great place to be. Life is good.

Within my own stick figure experience, I find that I am happiest when I get one thing right. It’s when I put the sticks down and increase the balloons that I am happiest. Open communication always makes things better for me. It isn’t meant to be a game as much as it is a gift. Open-fire with a bazooka does very little to make me feel good, even if it is as harmless as a few remarks on paper. When I choose to hold back information that could help resolve hurt feelings, I am really setting someone else up for a game of hang man (may he rest in peace) and that’s just not fair. However, when I choose to fill my balloons with honesty and a willingness to work things out, that’s when I remember that Jesus is there on the sidelines, not only as a referee, but as my coach. He is always willing to show me a better way if I am willing to let Him.

So why is it that, like this morning, a sermon can be delivered to me directly, and yet I have to learn the hard way by playing cruel games? Not sure. But I’m starting to figure things out, and I like how it feels. I like the feeling of peace and accomplishment when I face my fears and communicate how I am feeling to resolve my concerns. All I need is the right kind of balloons. No weapons are required – no heat, no noose – just enough faith to overcome my differences.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Wanting

2010-08-08T22:07:00.002-06:00

Empty.
My soul felt void.
Stripped of water and bread to sustain,
I missed my well and grain –
A source of energy that powers the heart
To action,
To feel and breathe again.

Yearning,
I looked for fuel –
For strength that carries, inspires, and lifts,
So highly valued among my gifts.
I sought reprieve to calm my wants
As time,
I hoped, my thoughts would sift.

Desire points me.
Passions drive me.
My appetites, constant, uphold my need,
Near amounts that closely border greed.
Wondering why I want so much
I pause,
Then let my will concede.

Trying,
I ask in faith,
And not to consume upon my lust,
But to still the raging tempest thrust.
My heart I turn to Him who hears,
…and wait.
His will is always just.

Oh,
How my soul hungers
To learn control and understand
How to receive from the Master’s hand.
I’ll look to Him to fuel my soul,
And then, one day,
Accept the perfect things He’s planned.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Renewable Fuel and Individual Power

2010-08-02T00:06:00.005-06:00

Thousands of windmills were spread across the hillside of the Altamont Pass. The impression of enormity was stunning. Each windmill in the wind farm towered over me by several stories. The experience of being next to a single windmill was vastly different than seeing the panorama from my home in Tracy, California. I remember many mornings looking through clouds to see the Altamont range in the west. Most of the time I could not see the windmills that covered those hills. Occasionally, the sky was clear enough to see the full array in the distance. For some reason, I recall more of those moments on Sunday mornings as I was leaving for church. Although not related, that relationship made an interesting association for me.

Contrasting this image with the effects of ever-present coal-burning in the Nineteenth Century suggests not only a different picture, but a different way of life. Poet, Thomas Hardy penned the following in his poem, The Darkling Thrush:

I leant upon a coppice gate
When Frost was spectre-gray
And Winter’s dregs made desolate
The weakening eye of day.
The tangled bine-stems scored the sky
Like strings of broken lyres,
And all mankind that haunted night
Had sought their household fires.

In American cities where coal was available for fuel, skies were often blighted with coal dust and smoke. Snow and clothing on a clothesline, alike, would be grayed from the use of this black fuel. Walls and ceilings inside of homes would be layered in soot. Coal dust would collect inside walls and attics, and would settle on the surface of drapes and furniture. The presence of coal was everywhere and dusting was a part of daily life. Many of the negative effects of this fuel were widely overlooked because it was such a powerful fuel.

Power and electricity are an integral part of modern life. We depend on power to heat and cool our buildings, to prepare and preserve our food, to light our homes, to run our appliances, and to power our computers. Technology scarcely exists without electricity. Without power, long lines of cars can be seen waiting to take turns passing through a busy intersection when a traffic signal goes out. Without power, businesses and industry come to a halt. We rely on power to fuel our lives, and yet fuel is required to generate power.

In past generations, it may have been difficult to separate the need for fuel with the type of fuel that was available, only because options were limited. However, after decades of ignoring the fact that some fuels create problems that don’t go away without intervention, the idea of stewardship for our environment is increasing. Why? Because there are better options.

The windmills of the Altamont Pass Wind Farm generate enough power to run 120,000 homes a year. This represents nearly a third of California’s emission-free energy. Harnessing the winds, such as those that approach 30 miles per hour as they pass from the coast into the Central Valley of California, is referred to as a passive energy solution. It is passive because it takes advantage of energy that is readily available without requiring additional fuel to generate it.

Similar to our outward energy needs, every individual person has a specific set of internal needs that fuels our motivations. This need for energy warms our hearts, preserves our hope, and lights our way. We are driven by desires. Our desire for comfort stretches our comfort levels to do hard things so that we can have more of what we want. Our need to eat and sleep compels us to put other interests aside. Our passions and appetites move us to act, which is a primary reason why we are here on earth – to learn how to act. As we learn to control these powerful motivators we learn to become more like God.

I believe that we often fail at separating our energy needs from the fuel that is required to acquire it. We may look at our desires and judge them as wrong because we associate them with pollutive processes. Or, we may justify the means of fueling our hope because our desires are so great. In either case, recognizing that there are better options will help us in our personal stewardships to control our desires, appetites, and passions.

Spencer W. Kimball taught that “Jesus saw sin as wrong but also was able to see sin as springing from deep and unmet needs on the part of the sinner.” I love this example because it demonstrates that Jesus’ ability to separate the sin from the sinner, and the need from the act. As I follow Jesus, I become better at making the same distinction. Most often, when I desire to do something wrong, or something that may not be good for me, it is usually not because I have evil desires, but because I have needs that aren’t being met. As I separate the need from the act, I can then determine the best way to make sure my divinely given needs are met.

Our passions can be great motivations when properly controlled. But all too often, when these needs go unmet, we become impatient. When promised blessings do not arrive when hoped for, we often accept alternatives. This willingness to settle for something less than what God intended makes us both vulnerable and susceptible to temptation. When a trial is delivered instead of a needed blessing, we are tempted to doubt God’s integrity. Instead of trusting that the pain is a sign that something greater is on its way or is about to be delivered, we question why God has forgotten us.

Considering the windmills of the Altamont, there are passive sources of individual power available for each of us to tap into. It does not mean that we can be passive in collecting the energy. It simply means that God has already provided a renewable energy source that will cover all of our needs. I don’t think I can overstate the full meaning of “all” in this sense. Father wishes to give us everything He has. He wants to provide for us. He wants us to turn our hearts toward Him and rely wholly upon Him as a source of our faith and hope.

If a windmill is not turned directly toward the wind, the propeller won’t turn as much as it could. If the parts are not maintained, the windmill won’t function properly and the initial expense will have been in vain. Similarly if our hearts are not turned to God, and if our necks are stiff so that we are not willing to adjust to changing circumstances, we cannot benefit from the blessings that He offers so freely. We will not be able to benefit from the price of the atoning sacrifice that was made up front by The Only Begotten. His effort will not have been in vain, but we may not fully benefit from it unless we choose to act in a manner that is consistent with His teachings.

One definite advantage of internal passive energy solutions is that I can access that power without having to pollute my own spiritual environment. I don’t have to worry about polluting my inheritance. I can find deeper peace and motivation to live fully with less expense and effort. The power of God is readily available to those who seek it. The cost, as always, is a broken heart and contrite spirit. The cost is choice. It’s not a cost to be undervalued, for sure. It is much better than the expense of a shattered life, heartache, or regret caused by a lifetime of ignored pollution and spiritual soot. With that kind of mess, if you haven’t been dusting on a daily basis, you will likely have some serious stains to clean. That is still doable, but much harder by comparison.

The beauty of this kind of individual power is that it is renewable. It doesn’t run out, and it isn’t a burden to maintain. Simply put, it is clean, and pure, and constant. When we turn to the Lord, his blessings flow over, even that there is not room enough to receive them. They are endless and eternal.

Recently I learned something alarming about the windmills of Altamont Pass. While there are many positive benefits to this passive and renewable power, thousands of windmills can also have a negative impact on the environment. It is estimated that these power collecting tools are responsible for the deaths of up to 4,700 birds each year. It is frustrating to find that something so good can still cause so much harm. In this case, the best methods we have found so far may be better than burning coal, but they still have some negative impacts. I guess we’ll keep trying and keep looking.

In my own life, there are times where I try to meet my own needs while making good choices, and then find that I have been successful at someone else’s expense. It is very disappointing to get a needed break only to find that one of my children was hoping to spend time with me. I would much rather spend time with my wife, knowing that it is just as rewarding for her as it is for me. For the most part, I think I am pretty successful. When I am not, well, I guess I have an opportunity to keep trying and keep looking.

There are other forces in the world that have greater energy potential. The ocean is deep and has a constant energy that doesn’t stop. The mass of the earth itself stores heat that we are only beginning to tap into. The sun radiates light constantly throughout the day. Our methods for tapping the resources that are already there without negative side effects are improving.

Perhaps there is yet a better way to find the personal energy I need. I don’t think I have to change my needs, I just have to adjust my methods. If I bridle my passions the way we bridle the wind, then I have a greater potential for my heart to be filled to overflowing. I may make some mistakes in the process, but at least I know that God’s way is always the best way. When I follow the promptings of the Holy Spirit, I don’t have to worry.

One significant key to finding this individual power that is renewable and constant was revealed by the Lord. It relates to the windmill being oriented directly toward the wind, or the source of power. He said, “And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things.” (Doctrine & Covenants 88:67) I may not have all the answers now, but if I seek the light of Christ, I will be better prepared to comprehend better solutions, especially those that have fewer negative impacts.

The closer I get to the source of perfect power, the closer I get to perfection. I may have a long way to go, but at least I know my course. My desires, appetites, and passions provide motivations to live more fully. My needs aren’t wrong, they just need to be harnessed. As I practice, little by little I gain a greater understanding of how to put that fuel to work without pollution. I employ better methods. I take advantage of the power within and without. I look for ways to become more like God. As I succeed, I am not only sustained, I am renewed. I become better.

Individual power starts with the power to choose. As I control myself in a manner that is pleasing to God, I find more energy to do what I need to, as well as the things I desire. For me, that’s the best kind of fuel.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

How Long Shall I Suffer?

2010-07-25T21:53:00.002-06:00

Mormon’s admonition to pray for charity with all energy of heart has been on my mind a lot lately. He understood a principle I feel I am just beginning to understand. While there are many good things we can do in life, there is only one way to return to our Father’s presence, and that is through His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ. As we live the way He lived, as we choose to do what He did, we become like Him. We become pure.

The gift of charity, or the pure love of Christ, is described as the greatest of all the gifts of God. It is the gift that will lead us to eternal life. While this gift cannot be purchased with money or be received by giving our excess to a charitable organization, the gift comes with a heavy price. The amount is the cost of a single heart offered to the Lord – mine.

The prophet Mormon described this cost to his people. “And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” (Moroni 7:45)

In the scriptures the word, “suffer,” has two meanings that are related but different. One meaning is to endure pain, distress, loss, separation, or even death. King Benjamin described the suffering that Jesus would endure for our sakes in similar terms. “And lo, he shall suffer temptations, and pain of body, hunger, thirst, and fatigue, even more than man can suffer, except it be unto death; for behold, blood cometh from every pore, so great shall be his anguish for the wickedness and the abominations of his people.” (Mosiah 3:7)

This type of suffering describes all experiences that are difficult and unpleasant. It is usually associated with pain that is either physical, or emotional. Some pain that we feel may only be temporary and fleeting. Pain can also be severe enough that it causes damage and leaves a mark. I find great comfort knowing the atoning sacrifice Jesus made for all mankind will take away our pain and heal our marks. He has made it possible to find hope.

The second meaning of the word, “suffer,” can be found in the New Testament. As a group of people brought their children to be blessed by Jesus, His disciples rebuked them. Jesus’ reply to His disciples was, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.” (Mark 10:14) The account of this story does not describe the experience of having young children come to Him as difficult or unpleasant. In fact, it was something that Jesus wanted. In this context the word, “suffer,” means to allow or permit.

As I consider these two meanings in relation to the cost of charity, I am left wondering how they relate. Suffering alone does not equate to love. Merely allowing unpleasant things does not guarantee us greater love, either. However, if I take both meanings and I add them to a common purpose, I get a different result. If I am willing to endure difficult trials and allow Father to direct my life because I trust Him, it may not be pleasant, but in the larger picture I can count on Him to make my life better. When I do hard things out of love, my love increases and my capacity to love increases.

Suffering can often teach us lessons we wouldn’t learn any other way. Paul in his letter to the Hebrews describes the prophet Melchizedek who offered “strong crying and tears” with his prayers that God would save him from death. Little more is known about his experience except that he learned “obedience by the things which he suffered.” (Hebrews 5:6-8) Melchizedek was a man of great faith, but that too came with a cost.

At the beginning of His ministry, Jesus went into the wilderness to pray. “And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights and had communed with God, he was afterward an hungered and was left to be tempted of the devil.” (JST Matthew 4:2) I find it interesting that Jesus was doing something good and was rewarded with a trial. That is how it may look from the first appearance, anyway. Instead, consider that Jesus went into the wilderness to submit to the Father. He wasn’t looking for a reward. He was there to worship. Because His vision was clear in spite of His lack of strength, He was true to the Father and chose not to worship the deceiver.

Sometimes, the only way we learn the lessons Father wants us to is through difficult experiences. Joseph Smith taught that Jesus “suffered temptations but gave no heed unto them.” (Doctrine & Covenants 20:22) He lived a perfect life, but He still suffered and learned grace to grace.

King Benjamin also prophesied of the suffering that Jesus would endure. He said that Jesus would subject Himself to the Father, and that He “suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people. … Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father. (Mosiah 15:5-8) This passage includes both definitions of the word “suffer.” Jesus suffered, and He allowed Himself to suffer, that He might gain victory over sin and death.

At a time in his life when it appeared that he could suffer no more, Joseph Smith prayed to the Father for himself and for his people, “O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place? How long shall thy hand be stayed…? let thine heart be softened, and thy bowels moved with compassion toward us.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:1-2, 4)

The Lord’s reply was merciful. “My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes. Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands. Thou art not yet as Job….” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:7-10) The Lord continues, “If thou art called to pass through tribulation;” and he lists a number of examples of suffering, “if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he? Therefore, hold on thy way… for God shall be with you forever and ever. (Doctrine & Covenants 122:5, 7-9)

Poor Joseph. In his darkest moment, he had not yet endured as Job. He had not suffered like the Lord of all. But he did have a reason to hope. God did not abandon Job, but blessed him with increase. The Lord “gave Job twice as much as he had before,” and “blessed the latter end of [his life] more than his beginning.” (Job 42:10, 12) God did not abandon His Only Begotten Son, either. After Jesus knelt in the Garden of Gethsemane, he prayed, “Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.” I love this example because Jesus prayed out of the honesty of His heart. He told Father what he wanted, but then clarified that He would submit to the Father’s will. He suffered. Then, “there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. And being in agony he prayed more earnestly: and he sweat as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.” (Luke 22:42-44, JST Luke 22:44)

The Lord told Joseph Smith, “I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent; But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I; Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit – and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink – Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men.” (Doctrine & Covenants 19:16-19)

Knowing that someone else knows what you are going through can be a great comfort. Knowing that Jesus has done something for us so that we wouldn’t have to is a tremendous gift! Knowing that even He had a hard time and didn’t want to do it makes His experience that much more personal to me. Believing that God does not lie and He does not change gives me hope that He will help me and save me in my desperation, too. Faith will get me started in the right direction, and hope will provide motivation when things get difficult. But, it is charity, the pure love of God, that will see me through to the end when my trials seem unbearable.

As I compare the many tears I shed in my own suffering with the blood that was shed in my behalf by the Savior, I am tempted to feel small and ashamed that I am so weak and vulnerable. The thing that saves me from greater self-pity and despair is that Jesus does not ask me to do what He did. I don’t have to suffer the way He did. I just need to live the way He wants me to, and that will be enough. I am not as strong as He is, but together we can do anything. I am not perfect like He is, but I am trying. I am not required to be perfect in my weakness. If I want to be like Jesus, I am required to turn to Him in faith when I am having a hard time. As I turn to him, then I can suffer the difficult lessons. I can allow Father to take the time He needs to make me better. I find I can do more and more through practice and prayer, as long as I have hope.

In the midst of that dark moment for Joseph Smith, the Lord gave him some instruction that was also meant to give him hope. And here we come back to the idea that I started with – charity. “Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distill upon thy soul as the dews from heaven. The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:45-46) This strength all starts with charity, which never faileth.

Whether it is charity that helps me in suffering, or that I gain more charity through the right kind of suffering, I don’t know for sure. But if I am willing to endure, and allow difficult lessons to shape who I am because I am seeking charity, at least I know that I am moving in the right direction. Little by little, and grace for grace, my heart becomes purer and I become a little more ready to meet my Savior. Each time that my suffering increases, I turn to Father in prayer. And, like Joseph, Melchizedek, and the Savior, Father will hear and answer our prayers. He will send angels to comfort us and buoy us up. I know Father will bless us with that which we seek if we pray for charity with all the energy of heart.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Maybe I’m Still a Toddler

2010-07-18T19:49:00.004-06:00

This morning I sat a little more incognito in a church congregation other than my own. The setting was Washington D.C. The sermon was taught by a toddler. In fact he sat in the pew right in front of me. It’s not that the other speakers weren’t uplifting; I just discovered I could learn a lot from a two-year old.

The beautiful young mother who claimed the boy was doing a marvelous job of keeping his sermon under control. She was patient. Knowing the capability of her boy, it may have been that she didn’t want to take the spotlight away from the other sacrament meeting speakers. In any event, I couldn’t help but notice the dialogue between the two after the boy started with an object lesson. He leaned forward, cocked the trigger, and released his body movement backward where he hit his head on the top edge of the pew.

“Don’t bump your head on the bench,” she whispered calmly, “It will hurt.”

“No,” was his reply.

“Yes,” was hers.

“No.”

“Yes. It will.” Her voice remained loving and patient.

“No.” I could tell that he wasn’t trying to be defiant; it just came natural without any thought. He liked the “power word” he had discovered not long ago.

“See this wood right here?” his mother said, pointing to the back of the bench.

The boy looked at the bench, and having done what she said, replied, “No.” Then he repeated the backward movement again and hit his head on the bench. It is possible that it really didn’t hurt, and that is why he said no. I have a suspicion, however, that he was having more fun refuting his mother than he was trying to hit his head.

Sometimes I hit my head on the bench repeatedly, convinced it wont hurt that much. Even if it doesn’t – even if pain is not the issue – Father has prepared specific lessons for me, and if I miss what He is trying to teach me, I just keep banging my head on the wall. It’s more frustrating when, after the fact, I realize what I have been doing, especially if I have refused to look behind me at the pew.

Next it was time for the sacrament, but the boy didn’t pause his sermon at all. He proceeded to hold up his toy, and said, “Helihopter.” He then made raspberry sounds with his tongue trying to simulate the sound of a propeller on a helicopter. Looking at his mother, he asked, “Sacament?” The mother nodded her head. His retort was swift as though he had been preparing his talk for months. “I’na go home!” Perhaps he was convinced that she didn’t understand, or maybe he understood that good preachers will sometimes repeat an idea for effect as he himself continued to repeat, “I’na go home,” over and over, using every possible intonation variation he could think of. I think he was more interested in experimenting to see how many different ways he could say the same thing than he was in trying to get his point across. Eventually he was distracted by the bread and water being passed, at least temporarily.

The boy figured out a new way to make noise when the mother informed him, “don’t do that or you’ll have to go out.” It was amazing to see the thought process parade across his face in a matter of seconds before he looked at her and said, “I’na go out.” Remember, two-year-olds understand emphasis more than we give them credit when they can slow down the pronunciation of a key word by two to three times. The word, “out,” was said in just such a way, with his slightly-whining-tone dropping as he lengthened the word.

I couldn’t help but chuckle, mostly because I could relate. There are a lot of things I “wanna” do sometimes, but I can’t – at least not at the moment. Sometimes I whine, too. It isn’t hard to think, “I would rather be anyplace than here,” when things aren’t going the way I want them to. If I could take an easier way out of a difficult situation, I just might. Most of the time, it isn’t even offered to me.

Whether it is my home on earth, or my home in heaven, I know what it feels like to want to go home, too. That may be my most important goal, but I can often be distracted by what I want. If I am distracted too much, I may want to give up and get out. Seldom does that really get me where I need to go. It is simply another distraction that seems to offer relief.

Once the boy found a quiet activity book with familiar colors and shapes, he left his sermon for a time. I don’t think this had the same effect on me as an intermediate rest hymn (which gives us rest from what, I don’t know), but it too came to an end, as did his attention for the book. Next came another object lesson.

The boy walked over to his little baby sister and apparently wanted to hit her, so he did. This, like everything else in his lesson, came in a pattern that he repeated over and over. Whap, whap, whap. Again, similar to his other messages, I don’t think he was as concerned about hurting his sister as he was in wanting to hit her. Why is it that we have a natural tendency to hurt those we love most, usually without meaning to? His mother saw what was happening and placed her hand in front of her daughter, offering her hand as an alternative target. The boy caught on to the game quick and diverted his fire and brimstone toward a more eager participant.

In this case, the boy’s intent wasn’t wrong; it just needed to be redirected. He was chastened and he hardly noticed. More and more I try to look at what I am doing and ask, “What effect is this having on those around me? Am I hurting them without meaning to? How can I redirect my intent to avoid causing pain?” I really take no pleasure in hurting others, especially those I love most. In order to avoid doing this, I have to look through their eyes, which is not always an easy thing.

As the boy’s sermon drew to a close, he gave one more glance at his mother, paused until she was looking directly at him, and then he repeated his head-banging-on-bench statement to sum up his topic. Was he right? Maybe. Was his mother right? Yes. Did the two see eye to eye by the end of the sermon? No, I don’t think so. That may take a few years, or fifty.

The boy obviously hasn’t been introduced to the concept of a dénouement, or he would have recognized that he had the perfect conclusion to his message. Instead, he sat there smiling for a moment (as if to say, “wait for it…”), then suddenly he ruptured into tears. Kablowey! Instant meltdown. The fact of the matter was that HE WAS HUNGRY, and he just barely noticed. Sadly for him, he didn’t have anything to eat. After the closing prayer, the sobbing boy exited the chapel holding his mother’s hand, still missing the lesson. Or did he?

If I find that I have a greater understanding than a toddler and still exhibit the same behavior, can I rightly say that he understands any less than I do. Sometimes I cry when I don’t get what I want. I make up reasons of why my needs are greater than a toddler. And then, when I look through his eyes, I start to understand that we are not that different.

Each time the boy delivered part of his message, I could see that his intent could be taken wrong. He did one thing, but it usually didn’t match his intent. The truth of the matter is that he was just trying to do his best, staying where he should be, right where his mother and his Father wanted him to be. That was part of the lesson intended for him.

When life gets hard, I remember that my Savior has no intention of hurting me. In fact, in His case, he paid a price that I could not pay at all, just so I wouldn’t have to. He offers His hand to me, regardless of whether I take it or divert my fire and brimstone towards Him. I hope I never do that again. His hand gives me great comfort. His intent is to save me. Fortunately for me, He communicated that clearly without confusion when He offered not only His hand, but His life. I am so grateful for the lessons He has taught me. I am grateful for His gift.

Too many times, the lessons I was meant to learn are so obvious. They have been right in front of my nose the entire time. Sometimes, they are seated on a pew rather than a pulpit.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Change

2010-07-11T22:48:00.002-06:00

While living in California for a couple of years, I missed a particular family get-together that has been repeatedly retold ever since. The story goes that my niece, a toddler at the time, was just catching on to the concept of Christmas and what it meant to be given a gift. One of the gifts that she received was unforgettable – a pair of socks. She was so excited! Because of her reaction, someone in the family decided to hand her another gift. The socks were rewrapped and presented to her again. To her delight she received “another” pair. I’m not sure exactly how long Christmas kept improving like this until she realized that she was continually reopening the same gift.

Boyd K. Packer once said, “Things that don’t change remain the same.” It’s a nice piece of common sense, don’t you think? With the scarcity of common sense sometimes, it is helpful to have the obvious pointed out so plainly. I often wonder why some circumstances in my life don’t seem to change as fast as I would like. Then I look to see if I have done anything to merit a different outcome. “Hmm. I guess not,” is my usual observation.

My wife and I have been discussing some of our observations about change this week on our early morning walks. I won’t steal too much of her thunder, but she had a great analogy for life’s lessons. We all seem to learn the same lessons, but we often learn them in a different order. Sometimes we don’t learn from them when the opportunity is given to us. Consequently, we keep opening the same present expecting a different result. I’m not sure about you, but I often find the wrapping paper looks a little different, but the bow that wraps up the gift seems to be the same each time.

Whether or not change is desirable seems to have everything to do with choices. If I have control over my choices, and the resulting change, I feel better about things. When I feel like the change is out of my control, and that it limits my choices, I feel very uncomfortable. Sometimes I feel trapped, frozen, or confined. I feel like I am being acted upon because I am not able to control my circumstances. It is interesting to note that agency is the freedom to choose within a given set of conditions. I don’t always get to choose the conditions, which leaves me with the feeling of not having control. This doesn’t mean I have lost my agency, or my ability to choose.

Liz and I recently talked with some good friends about the types of change we have felt and experienced this year. Some changes are a gradual deluge of blessings or trials. Some are more abruptly taken or given. Occasionally a change may appear to take everything you have learned and turn it upside down, as though it no longer is true, only to find out that you just had to shake out the parts that weren’t true to make room for things that are truer. Each type of change has its place in the lessons we get to unwrap. That said, it is still easier to make sense of a difficult lesson after you have gone through it and completed it than it is to get your bearings when you are right in the middle.

One beautiful example of change is the transformation of a caterpillar to a butterfly. The caterpillar has its own type of beauty, while the butterfly has an aesthetic quality that seems to be more widely recognized. Seldom, however, have I heard anyone say, “Hey, look at that! Have you ever seen such a stunning cocoon?” Yet it is inside the veil-thin walls of a cocoon that the beautiful transformation takes place. The separation is just enough for the caterpillar to become something new and amazing, no matter how confining it appears. Having experienced mild forms of claustrophobia before, I wonder what the caterpillar feels like during the process.

Another type of change is related to temperance, or the ability to endure lessened conditions. In the case of tempered steel, a piece of steel is gradually heated to a very hot temperature. At the appropriate time and condition, the steel is then plunged into cold water, which causes a reaction in the metal. The immediate change in circumstances may seem a shock to the system, but it makes the steel much, much stronger. There are times when I have had a gradual increase in blessings, only to have them taken away in an instant. Conversely, I have also had trials that increased gradually to where it seemed I could bear no more, and then there was instantaneous relief. I remember those sudden changes acutely, with both sorrow and happiness.

Whether a slow process of being confined with in a veil or cocoon, or the abrupt process of tempering, change becomes more manageable and endurable when I can count on someone to help me through the process who knows exactly what I am feeling. In many cases, the only one who understands completely is God.

C. S. Lewis compared this transformation process to God helping us with a slight remodeling job. “Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right, and stopping the leaks in the roof, and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably, and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of– throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

It is often difficult to tell at the onset whether God is giving us a trial or a blessing. There have been many times that I have received a blessing only to discover that it was a test to see if I would do what I said I would do in a circumstance where I had less need. I have also found a number of trials to be great blessings after the fact because of the way they made me stronger, more capable, and more able to receive greater blessings. The more I experience change, the more inclined I am to hold out on passing judgment, and simply acknowledge that Father knows a better way.

The Lord taught Joseph Smith an important principle about accountability. He said, “He that receiveth of God, let him account it of God; and let him rejoice that he is accounted of God worthy to receive.” (Doctrine & Covenants 50:34) Each phrase in this sentence is worth looking at carefully. The Lord doesn’t specify whether it is blessings or trials that we receive at His hand, just that we should acknowledge Him if He is the giver. This also implies that accountability is not just responsibility, but acknowledging duty and devotion to the giver. Lastly, the fact that we have received a trial or blessing from God implies that He feels we are ready for it. Receiving an opportunity or a lesson from God is different than taking it. Perhaps there are trials that may be self-induced, but all blessings come from God and we should rejoice that He stays involved in our personal lives.

If I can get past my initial assessment of whether an experience, opportunity, or lesson is a blessing or a trial, and merely recognize when it is of God, then my perception of the experience undergoes a change. It may not be easy, but my attitude will likely be different and the change begins to affect me internally and not just externally. This requires me to change my mind about changing my heart, a softening that helps me to yield because I know God is always right.

Many years ago when I was a teenager, I read in Matthew 3 where there is a description of John the Baptist. I looked at a footnote to John’s name and saw the following, “The Greek word denotes ‘a change of heart or mind,’ i.e. ‘a conversion.’ ” Since I share his name, I was excited that my name had that kind of meaning. It gave me the desire to be converted to a greater degree. I was inspired to actively seek a change of heart and mind rather than fear it. This simple verse had a great impact on me for many years. It was only recently that I read that same passage again and made a startling discovery. I realized that I had read the wrong footnote. The note that I had attached myself to referred to the word, “repent,” that appears in the adjacent verse. I had been mistaken about the reference perhaps, but I hadn’t been wrong about the meaning.

This epiphany (or rather, apostrophe, if you will) didn’t shatter me because I had been wrong about reality. Whether or not the verse pointed to the footnote that meant so much to me was irrelevant. The important truth, in this case, was that I saw something that inspired me, enough that I wanted to change for the better. I made a choice. The truth was, I had read something full of meaning and I internalized it. It was powerful enough that it caused me to make changes on my own. I had followed a partial idea that led me to a much better place. Occasionally when I experience a change, and the world as I know it seems to turn upside down, I find that I am just shaking off the things that may not be true. Then when everything turns right-side-up again, I have a more accurate picture that leads me to an even better place. So much of my ability to do this depends on faith and intent.

Alma the younger spoke of his father, Alma, and the change that he underwent as he listened to the prophet Abinadi. He said, “And according to his faith there was a mighty change wrought in his heart. Behold I say unto you that this is all true.” (Alma 5:12) Changes were occurring all around Alma the elder. He was being taught that many of his choices had been wrong. Even though he was a priest called to lead the people to do good, he was leading them astray. Alma began to internalize what he heard into something that he could feel. Instead of hardening his heart and resisting change, he softened his heart and acted upon what he knew to be true. Because of his faith, he wrought a mighty change.

The beauty of this example is that Alma was in control of whether he was acting or being acted upon. Rather than choosing to be angry at the implications on his character, he chose the path of greater freedom. He chose not to resist the changes the Lord wanted to make in his life. Alma also records what the Lord did for others. “Behold, he changed their hearts; yea, he awakened them out of a deep sleep, and they awoke unto God.” (Alma 5:7) This suggests that a hardened heart is sleepy and not very cognizant. Choosing to resist God lulls us further to sleep to where we have a diminished sense of reality. On the other hand, obeying God gives us increased understanding, ability, and awareness. When we are presented with an opportunity for positive change, it always leads to a better place.

As a creature of habit and weakness looking for stability and security, change does not come easy for me. A willingness to be obedient doesn’t necessarily make obedience less painful. Instead, that willingness may provide an opportunity to get to a better place with less lingering in sorrow or sleepy resistance. The difficulty of the change does not dissipate or disappear, but the opportunity to change increases my opportunity to find greater happiness sooner. If I wish to be like God, I have to be willing to change. I need to depend upon Him and rely upon His understanding to get me through the transformation. I have to trust that I will be safe within the veil of my understanding. The cocoon is there to protect me as much as provide a reason to have faith. As I am tempered, my desire may grow stronger, but so does my ability to make correct choices. Through practice, I become more and more comfortable with change, even when it is difficult. Through obedience I become more like God.

There is a small irony with change. God is constant and does not vary. “I am the Lord, I change not….” (Malachi 3:6) And yet He asks us to do something that He does not do. Why? God only asks us to change so we can become more like Him. He wants us to eliminate our imperfections and our sins. He wants us to change our hearts to match His. When we have done that, we will no longer be required to change. Until then, He will continue to provide us with opportunities to change for the better. If we see them for what they are, and we internalize these changes in our hearts, He will provide more opportunities. If not, we may find that we keep getting the same opportunity again and again. The wrapping may be different, but the bow that ties it all together is usually the same.

Change is rarely easy, but it is the path back to Father. Placing my faith in Him allows me to internalize the changes occurring around me and soften my heart. As my heart becomes more flexible, I become more like Him. I become more eligible to access His power that makes all things seem possible. All I have to do is turn to Him. Difficult challenges become more manageable and endurable when I can count on someone to help me through the process who knows exactly what I am feeling. In most cases, the only one who fits that description is the One who provided the opportunity for me to change in the first place. Receiving positive change is receiving God. Placing my faith in Him as I open my heart to change makes all the difference in the outcome.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

2010-07-04T22:09:00.006-06:00

The heart,
Honest, and open, and gratitude driven,
Yearns for more and more –
To give, to share, to live
And become.

The taste of freedom
Exquisitely flavored, ceaselessly stirs.
It moves, arouses, and inspires,
Compelling many acts
To greater distance.

Each pass of freedom plunges the heart
Deeper in devotion, richer in loyalty
And stronger in love,
With a never ending search
For more.

Abraham sought to be, as others,
A greater follower of righteousness.
He searched and obtained
Both door and key
To his exaltation.

The pathway to more, the door and the key,
Are tied as with a ribbon,
Inseparably connecting
Our will with God’s
And the supernal powers of heaven.

And yet, all this is tied to more.

Freedom,
Judiciously granted, one choice at a time,
Is the power to act
Without feeling acted upon.
This is my choosing.

Sin is bondage,
And temptation is testing.
Each time I yield up my sins,
My freedom is increased
With more.

So here I spread my fears and my doubts,
My many bondages I cling to.
I extract all the parasitical things
I’ve acquired in life
And I offer.

Both hoping and waiting,
I follow the path of Abraham
Towards things that are greater.
As he was tried, I’ll take up my test.
I’ll leave my spread behind.

And yet, all this is tied to more.

God has promised to give
All that He has
To those who believe that he will -
More holiness given, increasingly able,
And only my sins to lose.

Trusting, I cast from my heart
All that God requires
With the harmful removed,
And place made ready,
He returns to me my desires.

God spoke to Abraham,
Of sand in the ocean, and stars in the heaven.
Count them, He said. All will be given.
The faithful who wait will yet receive,
In His due time.

Abraham 1:2

D&C 101:4-5

Genesis 22:17

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

A Deeper Conversation

2010-06-27T23:54:00.002-06:00

Anyone who knows me well also knows I love a good conversation, and the deeper the better. I love to talk with friends. The energy that comes from an enjoyable discussion of meaningful things can fuel me for days, and often longer. My interest is not talking for the sake of talking, but conversing with the intent to share. It isn’t just exchanging ideas, but finding something else in common. Sometimes it may be an idea that we agree on. Sometimes it is merely the fact that we can express different opinions openly without worry of causing offense or needing to be defensive. Most of the time, it’s just nice to have someone you can trust who feels the same. This type of sharing lifts me and inspires me.

Yesterday I had the opportunity to talk with a close friend of mine. We interrupted my errands and his lawn mowing for an unplanned visit and had just such a conversation. It picked me up for the rest of the day. In a matter of a few minutes we talked about a number of things that both of us had in common and felt strongly about. I ate it up. Consistently, I have been grateful that my friend has been willing to share with me, and challenge me, so I can grow. That is a priceless gift.

I talked with another close friend of mine yesterday as she was pulling weeds in her garden. Regrettably, we didn’t have time for a longer conversation, but the few minutes we did talk were very uplifting. I was grateful that a friendship could have that kind of effect. My feeling is that this is possible not just because of the conversation, but because we share other things in common, more than words alone. As I’ve mentioned, it’s nice to have someone you can trust who feels the same.

Many of my Salty Pockets posts this year have been tied to discussions I have had with my closest friends. We have shared ideas and have lifted each other. Then, almost without the ability to prevent it, that inspiration seems to spill out in everything else that I do. For me, this overflowing has been a beautiful thing. It has given me much to reflect on in regard to my closest relationships, and the conversations we have.

Daily, I have opportunities to talk with my Father in Heaven through prayer. These visits don’t have to be planned, but they need not be sporadic, either. Occasionally, I offer much longer prayers because my heart is so full and I need someone to talk to who I know will listen. I need a one-on-one connection with someone who understands me perfectly, so I pray. I find that when I do schedule these conversations regularly, I maintain an ongoing connection that uplifts me unlike anything else. Because we share something deeper, even a prayer that lasts a few minutes can go a long way to keeping my tank full. Each minute adds oil to my spiritual lamp as I prepare for the eleventh hour of the night.

Perhaps, like me, you have also had many conversations that aren’t so deep or substantial. Usually the subject matter is fleeting and inconsequential. On some occasions, small talk is brief and very convenient when you have something else you would rather be doing. It is easy to greet as a gesture, acknowledge the weather, and then move on to something that you consider more worthwhile. Perhaps, like me, you have wanted a deeper discussion, but the other party was anxious to get on with something else. It may not have been because you weren’t important to them, but perhaps because something else was pressing. I sometimes wonder if I do that to Father.

Planning to pray two, three, or even five times a day may be easier than matching my habit of prayer with real intent. If I really intend on talking to Father in Heaven, do I schedule time to talk with Him? Do I believe He will really listen and answer my prayers? Do I believe that I can not only pray to Him, but have a deeper conversation? My hope is to clarify the reality that Father wishes to converse with us as much as we want to converse with any close friend, and that this is really possible. The method is prayer made practical through practice.

Ashamedly I will admit that too many of my prayers with Father have had more resemblance to small talk than a deeper conversation. Instead of a dialog that has gone back and forth, I have somewhat hurriedly greeted as a gesture, acknowledged my thanks and what I needed, and then moved on to other things that were pressing. Yikes! Even as I say this it sounds awful and incriminating. If you think there is a possibility that this idea could also be mistaken as criticism towards anyone who has similar simple prayers, please pardon my offense and take a closer look at my intent.

One thing I do not wish to do is disrepute the power of a short, heartfelt prayer. Father blesses His children whenever they do what He asks, and to whatever degree that they offer. His words are clear, as given through His Only Begotten Son, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8) There is great validation that the Savior repeats the same thing twice, both in future tense and in present tense, with a statement of the result as though it has already happened. That is how Father works. Whether in the past or the future, it is the same. He does not lie, but keeps His word.

Perhaps, for those moments where I am looking for more, and I need more, I can plan for a deeper conversation with Father in Heaven. If I look beyond simply pouring out my heart to Him, hoping that it will be enough, I can pause to listen to what He has to say. If I am uplifted by conversation with a close friend that is deeper than small talk and strengthens my connection with that friend, why could I not enjoy the same blessing with a Father who loves me more than I can comprehend?

This idea of prayer as a form of conversation presumes a few points, which I personally have found to be true. First, the heavens are open. Father does not intend for us to walk aimlessly without direction. Rather, He speaks to His servants the prophets, and He will speak to us when we ask. Second, Father wants to give us every good thing. He is not selfish, but is waiting for us to be selfless so He can trust us with His treasure. Third, He has commanded us to ask for the things we need. This allows us to grow in faith when he answers our prayers. The only thing we have to lose is our faith if we choose not to ask at all. Fourth, God gives to all men liberally and doesn’t get upset when we ask Him for help. He is ready to give us more than we ask for, if we ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, and have faith in His son, Jesus Christ. If we believe these things to be true, then all that is left is to try.

The idea of prayer being conversational may sound disrespectful, as though it were too casual. As we offer up the prayers of our hearts, if we do not believe there can be an exchange, we shortchange our faith. We prevent Father from giving us the blessings He wants to give us. I also believe that we need to approach God in reverence and respect. Because He is perfect and I am not, I should not approach Him with a request as though I were haggling for a price at a store, believing that I had something of equal value to trade. Instead, I need to realize that His ways are not my ways. His are always better because they are perfect. His gifts are always greater than anything I have yet imagined. When I am willing to submit my will to His, Father can pour out blessings that will overflow into every part of my life because I am learning to be obedient. I am learning to be trusted.

An obvious follow up question to this notion may be, “If I haven’t had a conversation with God before, how can I begin?” I believe we start by understanding the two most important parts of a conversation – learning how to talk, and learning how to listen.

Very little caution has been given to what we say in our prayers except where we are presumptuous, proud, or selfish. “Be thou humble; and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to thy prayers.” (Doctrine & Covenants 112:10) Ask, “that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me, that ask and not for a sign that they may consume it upon their lusts.” (Doctrine & Covenants 46:9) When you pray, “use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.” (Matthew 6:7) Instead, “ask whatsoever you will in the name of Jesus and it shall be done. But know this, it shall be given you what you shall ask….” (Doctrine & Covenants 50:29-30)

One of my favorite examples of this attitude of prayer is when the Lord Jesus Christ was teaching His people among the Nephites. “And it came to pass that when Jesus had thus prayed unto the Father, he came unto his disciples, and behold, they did still continue, without ceasing, to pray unto him; and they did not multiply many words, for it was given unto them what they should pray, and they were filled with desire.” (3 Nephi 19:24)

What a wonderful thing, to be taught by the Holy Spirit how to pray, and to be filled with the desire that allows us to do so! Whenever I don’t feel like praying, but I know I should, I consider this scripture. Then I ask Father in Heaven to help me. I ask Him to teach me how to pray again and to fill me with desire as He did the Nephites. I have found this simple step works as often as I have the desire, or even as often as I wish I had the desire.

If I believe that Father wants to give me every good thing, this belief should lead me to have faith enough to trust Him. It should help me to want what he wants me to have, because it will be better. This doesn’t mean that I have to give up my desires. It also doesn’t require that I add the tagline, “if it be thy will,” at the end of my prayer. What it does mean is that I can ask him to teach me how to pray. I can ask Father to validate what I am praying for while I am in the act of praying. Because the heavens are open, and God does speak to His children, I can ask if what I am praying for is the right thing. But this requires the second part of the conversation, namely, listening.

The Lord has told us that He will give us answers to our prayers by confirming our thoughts and feelings through the power of the Holy Ghost. First, he expects us to study the issue to the best of our ability. Next, we should come to the best conclusion we can based on what we know. Then we should ask if our conclusion is right. If we are right, He will tell us by confirming truth in our minds and in our hearts. (Doctrine & Covenants 8:2-3) A stupor of thought will suggest that it is not true, but the warm burning feeling of peace that comes from the Holy Spirit will help us to recognize that it is true. (Doctrine & Covenants 9:7-9)

Applying this pattern to listening suggests a simple way to carry on a conversation through prayer. If I have a question I hope to have answered, and I ask, believing that Father will answer me, I should save time to wait for a response. If you haven’t done this before, I might suggest starting with a simple question to which you might expect a simple answer. You might try questions such as, “Father, are you there?” “Are you listening?” “Do you love me?” “Did Jesus really give His life for me?” And then wait for the confirming feeling. Yet, it is important not to forget the pattern for inspiration and revelation. Study it out, come to a conclusion, and then ask if you are right. If I feel that something is true, and then I feel a peaceful confirming feeling that reinforces it in my heart and in my mind, then I begin to understand how revelation works.

After experimenting, I may move on to less simple questions. “Are there prophets today?” “Do you speak to them?” “Is the Bible a true book?” “Is the Book of Mormon true?” If God has promised to answer such questions by the power of the Holy Ghost, then I should not doubt that He can answer more complicated questions. In this instance, if I want to be taught how and what to pray for, I might say, “Father, I am having a hard time making a decision. I have a few choices I can choose from, and I would really like this option, but I’m not sure it will be in my best interest. As I have looked at the possibilities the best I can, I feel that this is the way to go. Am I right? What would Thou have me do?”

In most conversations, one question may lead to another. By asking the right questions, and by coming to my own conclusions during my prayer, I may have additional questions to ask. The first time I experiment, I may only have one question. But, if I make prayer practical through practice, I may find that my prayer becomes a question and answer session where more information is shared. Those prayers have come to mean a lot to me, and they work. Prayer is such a simple yet powerful act. It is a means of communication that allows us to access the power of God and receive direction in our lives.

The key word to receiving “more” is merely to “receive.” The prophet Jacob taught, “Wherefore, brethren, seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy, over all his works.” (Jacob 4:10) In order to receive answers to prayer, I must be willing to tell Father what I would like, come to a conclusion, ask if it be right, and then be willing to accept the answer. It is not appropriate for me to tell Him what to do, or tell Him what is right. If I am not willing to accept a perfect answer from a perfect being, I may not be in the right frame of mind to receive an answer at all. This dilemma goes back to my first premise that a conversation has two parts. If I am not willing to listen, I am not willing to have a conversation. Contrary wise, if I am not only willing to listen, but I am willing to ask and continue learning, then I am prepared to talk with God.

Small talk has its appropriate times and places, but I usually get out what I put into it. It may be, if I want small blessings, that small talk might be enough to help me get what I need. I take great comfort, however, that Father is waiting for me to realize that He really is there to listen. He does want to help, and He will when I am ready to let Him. It’s up to me to take a few extra minutes to find sincerity and real intent. It’s now my decision whether I will be sporadic or plan time for a scheduled conversation. In either case, He is ready and is always available. The sky is the limit. While spending a few minutes with a close friend is nice, my preference is always a good conversation; with Father, the deeper the better.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

The Journey toward Father

2010-06-20T20:08:00.002-06:00

Walking has a way of putting me in an introspective mood. Actually, I quite enjoy that. I do some of my best thinking while I am walking. I wonder if perhaps that is because there is something literal about getting from here to there that suggests the same pattern to the mind – something that allows the thinker to arrive at a conclusion at roughly the same time as the physical destination. Either way, quiet moments to do little but think seem to come infrequently for me, so I take them when I can get them.

Running is another favorite pastime of mine. It’s an acquired taste, you might say, one that I didn’t like at all when I was younger. In fact, I was pretty adamant about hating it. Running for the sake of running seemed pointless. It wasn’t until I became very proficient in walking long distances that running held any interest for me. I realized that I could cover more ground in the same amount of time by simply increasing my pace a small amount. In that moment, I started to turn the key that unlocked my understanding. I saw running, not as arriving at a destination quickly, but a faster way to enjoy the same journey. It’s a subtle difference, I know, but still significant. Certainly, speed is a part of the experience – and so is agility, freedom, ability, performance, fitness, and the runner’s high – but you can’t leave out the journey, for me, or the picture isn’t complete. I love the things I get to see and experience along the way.

Writing, as you might guess, is another interest I have acquired that has surprised me. In most of my younger years, writing was something I could do, but I didn’t enjoy it. Like running, it was a means to an end, and I wanted it to end. I wanted to hurry up and be done so I could do something else. Once I realized that writing complimented some of my other interests, such as thinking and being creative, I looked at this task differently. I changed. Writing was not just something I did, it became something I am. It became a journey.

For the past eleven years, much of my little spare time has been poured into a single, but large, idea – a story. Most of the time, the idea sits on a shelf and neither walks nor runs. It doesn’t even crawl. The idea just sits and patiently waits for a chance to travel. For now, the story is lucky if a hint can peek through my other responsibilities the way glimpses of early morning sunshine spill through planks in a fence to punctuate shadows on the sidewalk. It’s as though I am walking along, with nothing exceptional to note, when a spark of an idea flashes into my mind, quickening my step. Those moments are still cool. The inspiration is a different type of energy that helps me to run.

Getting back to something you haven’t done recently can take more time than the task alone. When I don’t work on my story frequently, I feel a difference. I know the story well but there is a lack of familiarity that has everything to do with mindset. I have to be in the right frame of mind without a lot of distractions. With limited time, I need something that can transport me quickly. What I need is a faster vehicle to get back into my story. In this case, creativity is not the destination, it is the journey.

A few years ago, I realized the vehicle I needed was something that would remind me of where I left off. Better yet, the something should remind me of how I felt when I last stopped so I could pick up right where I left off. That something became a lot of somethings. I created maps, cultures, histories, sketches, models, sculptures, and drawings of characters. I even developed some simple musical themes that reminded me of places or people in the story. Then when I had some time to stop and think, instead of crawling back to my story, I could run and spend less time becoming familiar again.

More recently, I decided to go running on a trail I hadn’t been to for a very long time. It was the place where I first started walking a lot. It was also a place where I had spent hours and hours thinking about my story. I hadn’t been on this trail for more than a few minutes when I realized that I was humming some musical themes from my story. In fact, I was thinking of a few of the characters and had refined a new plot twist, almost without giving any thought to it at all. I was grateful to find that my faster vehicle was still in great working order. With the right conditions, it almost had a mind of its own. I was amazed that the mental vehicle I had chosen had that much potential ability.

Connections are powerful. I have discovered many, many times this year the influence of beautiful connections. Some, like precious metals, you expect to tarnish over time. If you own brass or silver, you also likely expect to do some polishing to keep them looking nice. Yet, there are other connections, like gold or platinum, that do not tarnish over time. They come with a greater cost and are more precious because of it. Those connections are still active when we are distracted by the planks of life’s fences. I am so grateful for these!

Looking back, I find that many of my interests come from my Dad. He likes to take long walks, he likes to write, and he is a deep thinker. He and my Mom taught me to walk, but I didn’t appreciate the love of walking for many years following. I didn’t pick up my love of writing by writing with him. However, watching him for many years taught me, inspired me, and gave me a passion for it. He taught me spelling, grammar, and he proofread and edited many papers for me while growing up. While I didn’t pick up the love for those things at the time, I have always loved him, and that connection has tied me to the things that he likes in a very powerful way.

Prayer is another pastime of mine that has taken years to develop. It is one that connects me to my Father. The interesting thing to me about this pastime is that I haven’t arrived yet – I am still working on it – and yet it has always been rewarding and fulfilling. Because I haven’t arrived, or mastered prayer yet, this leads me to believe that, like other things in my life, prayer is a journey and not a destination.

Father in heaven knows all things, and He knows the end from the beginning. He asks us to pray to Him, not so He can learn about us, but so we can learn about ourselves and how we can return to live with Him. As we pray to him, we can discover what it is we are really thankful for. We have an opportunity to count our blessings, rather than just be thankful for all of them collectively. Prayer also allows us to counsel with God, or rather receive counsel from Him. Each of us have a story to write. Father is more than willing to proofread and edit our decisions, but only when we ask or seek it from Him.

Fear, treasure, and love are powerful motivators for doing good. Fear may get us started, and treasure may make things more interesting, but love is the most precious and powerful motivation. In fact, it is the only motivation that is powerful enough to truly help us become like our Father. All other things may fail, but the pure love of God will not. This being the case, how can I get beyond crawling in my prayers? How can I learn to walk and then love to run? What can I do to make this connection more precious? I believe the answer is in my choice of vehicles.

So that I am not mistaken, please allow me to clarify that I am not trying to pray faster or get to heaven any quicker. What I hope to do is find a better vehicle for myself that makes my prayers more meaningful. I want to look forward to my prayers as my favorite part of the day or night, and not just something I need to do to earn a reward. If prayer is a journey, and there is lot to see and learn along the way, I want to make the most of my prayers. Just as I did with my story, I want to pick up right where I left off without losing any familiarity. What I need are the right type of somethings to help me, almost without thinking.

I feel we, as Father’s children, are very fortunate that He has already created such vehicles to pull at our hearts. He has spoken with prophets for centuries to write down His words and teachings. He has inspired servants who have taught us to study these vehicles every day. We have been given churches and temples as places to worship, after preparing our own hearts as places for worshipful service. Priesthood authority has been given to do His work and His will on earth as though He were here Himself. We are led by revelation as inspiration comes through the gift of the Holy Ghost. When we use each of these to reconnect with our Father, they will turn our hearts toward Him. Almost without thinking about it, we will begin to love the things that He loves because we are consciously thinking about the things that will connect our hearts to His. Doing so will make our prayers more meaningful and will enlarge our capacity to love as He does.

Prayer is one of the most powerful connections we can have with Father. Patiently He waits for us to turn our hearts to Him. I may pray often, but if I don’t pray with real intent and focus, I feel a difference. I feel distant. The act of prayer alone may not take much time, but reconnecting after taking a leave of absence does. To feel connected, I don’t have to pray on my knees constantly, I just have to keep a prayerful attitude in my heart. By doing so, I am able to find my way more quickly. More importantly I am able to find and keep the spirit with less difficulty. Then it becomes easier and easier to remember the change of heart I once felt. It stays fresh in my heart and mind as I turn my thoughts toward Him.

Each of us has a story to write with our personal decisions. I know my editor is willing to make all kinds of suggestions on how I can be happier, and how I can feel more of His love, but only when I am ready. Once I reconnect with Him in prayer, it is up to me to decide when I will walk and when I will run. Father lets each of us set our own pace. He has also promised to guide us and comfort us along the way. In short, He has done everything he possibly can to make the journey rewarding and fulfilling. All that is needed is for me to decide to return to my story and begin writing.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Death is a Doorway

2010-06-13T22:38:00.007-06:00

Standing
At the face of the reposed stone
Inscripted with names,
I rest
And remember
The mother I’ve never met.
I long
And yearn some more
For greeting phrases that await my arrival
In the next place,
A passage I have not yet read.

Waiting,
I reflect on my faithful friend
Who just now left,
So suddenly,
Passing through a door
In the ground –
A door admitting entrance
More readily
Than granting one return passage.
His place is further,
Another part in the book,
The next grand adventure.

Death,
A doorway not to be feared,
With plot largely unknown,
Is a path
From life to life
Between chapters of experience.
One school is finished,
Another begins,
But the life that passes through,
A common thread,
Is still the same,
Only more.
Death is merely a passage
To be written.

Mostly unseen,
One piece of my heart died,
Entering
The consuming furnace of unfamiliar trial
And test
As words I penned
Were etched in my heart by choice.
Repeatedly
My heart emerged again
And again,
Largely the same and unharmed.
Lesser parts purged,
The better made clearer.

The last time I passed away,
In the first place,
Or that which came before,
I left
Those who were familiar
And loved me.
In keeping my first estate,
I gave it up
And was given another.
Even now, I remember nothing
About that death.
Upon my leaving,
I was affectionately received
By family.

Did I lose or did I gain?
Which did it seem at first,
In that place?
Did I know
The expanse of loss
Makes room for more given?
Did I see
Losing the wrong is always better
And losing good
Temporary?
Did I know I would know
Someday?

Now I consider
The arrival of some future point
When my time here
Becomes
A passage in a book.
Will I fear that experience,
New and unfamiliar,
As though it is the first time?
Or will I be ready to turn another page
Just like the last?
If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.

Each time I die,
And offer one more part
That clings for existence,
The pattern of life is reread.
As long as I am willing,
The pathway seems to lead my heart and mind
Further up and further in.
If I remember, and feel,
I do not fear.
Verily,
It is written.

Books are inscripted,
Capturing the things we forget,
The memories
That escape our minds,
And the lessons
We thought we knew.
Death,
Is a doorway
Not to be feared,
But respected
With honest tears
In hope of the things we know
To wash away our fears.

“To die will be an awfully big adventure.” James M. Barrie, Peter Pan.

“One school is finished, and the time has come for another to begin.” Richard Bach, Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

“If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.” (Doctrine & Covenants 38:30)

“Come further up, come further in.” C. S. Lewis, The Last Battle.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Mirrors and Oneness

2010-06-07T08:59:00.004-06:00

Seeing someone in a crowd that reminds you of a friend or an acquaintance is not that uncommon of an experience. Perhaps it is because we are always looking, hoping for some sort of connection. More often than not, we are drawn to people who are most like ourselves because it gives us something in common that we can relate to. It gives us a foundation on which we can build and make more connections.

A couple of decades ago, I had an experience that seemed a little odd and unexpected. The situation was unique in that the occurrence had not happened before and has not happened since. I was at Disneyland with my parents and we were navigating a crowd of people near New Orleans Square to get in line for the next ride. As I was walking, I saw a maintenance worker dressed in white walking with a broom and dustpan. I stopped for a moment, taken aback. As I watched him, I thought to myself, “He looks just like me!” It was almost like looking in a mirror, or as close to it as I had ever experienced with a stranger.

Seeing this man caused me to ask some additional questions. “Do I walk that way? Is that how I look to other people? I wonder what he is like.” His appearance wasn’t identical but it was close enough that it had a strong effect on me. The image is still clear in my mind.

When you see a person who bears a resemblance to someone who is familiar to you, the type of relationship you have determines the reaction. If I were a criminal who had just robbed a store, recognizing someone may not be a good thing. Instead of hope, I might have pangs of fear. But, if I were to see a close friend that I hadn’t seen for many years, I may wish to become reacquainted. Had I been the robber, I may have been relieved to find out the person was not the security officer I expected. Or, seeing the person I thought to be my friend, I might be disappointed that the resemblance was only that, and not the actual acquaintance. Still, the memory of that friend may warm my heart with gratitude, if only in remembrance. It may also give me reason to look a little more.

Generally, I believe we tend to find what we are looking for. There are exceptions to this rule as we happen upon something wonderful that is unlooked for. Call it serendipity or providence, I believe there is room for both and they are usually discernable. Yet, if we have faith in God, I believe we tend to look for the fruits of our faith. We expect good things to happen. If we are watching, we will recognize more of God’s influence in our lives, and we will have more to be grateful for. This is one case where believing is seeing.

Separate from appearances, there are other times when I happen to meet someone in the crowd of humanity that seems very familiar. In many ways our meeting is like looking in a mirror. We may not appear the same, have similar genetics, or even be the same gender, but there is something else, deeper than appearances, with a striking resemblance. Almost instantly, something resonates clearly and I am left to ponder why. I can’t say I have lots of answers, but I am very grateful for those connections. I have found those associations to be powerful and beautiful.

When you see a person who more than resembles someone you know, and is someone you know, the type of relationship you have with that person also determines the reaction. Quickly we make a judgment. “Is this someone I want to engage in conversation or avoid? Do I have pangs of fear, or do I want to become reacquainted? Is this relationship more meaningful or less meaningful?” I don’t believe there are right or wrong answers, but our answers reveal much about our hearts. It is easier to want to be with people with whom you feel you share something in common.

Since my heart is the truest indicator of who I am, it is my heart that I want to purify. I want to be my best self and not just a shadow of what I can be. I want to take out the trash rather than collect it. The air is much fresher to breathe and I am at ease when I am not surrounded by garbage that builds up over time. I can put many things in my heart – be it fear or faith, love or anger, pride or humility – but once those things are there, they are not easily removed. All matter has gravity, and while the gravity of the earth is strong, I believe gravity of the heart is stronger.

A mirror can be quite useful. It gives a reflection of who we are and what we are like, at least on the outside. Like our hearts, a mirror is very revealing. It shows our admirable qualities and our blemishes. It is not always easy to take the full package and say, “It is what it is.” True, I am what I am, but it is also true that I can change. Even a mirror will show that much over time.

Emotions we associate with our mirrors can also speak volumes about our hearts. Some may love to look in a mirror to admire their own qualities. Some may look in the mirror for hours to improve how they appear. Others may be afraid to look at their reflection because they know what they will see, wishing they were different. Some may not be satisfied with what they see and yet do not feel empowered to change. Some may choose to look at a mirror with indifference, believing there are more important things than self. They are neither enamored nor afraid. Occasionally it may happen that some will look in the mirror and just be grateful. I suspect there are days in which we all look at our hearts they way we look at mirrors with a variety of emotions and expressions. A mirror is a funny place for pulling faces.

The concept of self is an interesting paradox. It is helpful to know where you are to know where you are not. We need to acknowledge self enough to be aware, but not so much that we are distracted. If I have some sense of where my heart is by how my desires are reflected in my actions, I can determine where I need to change. But, if I focus on myself too much in the mirror, I will also miss the import of what needs to be cleaned up. The heart is an excellent place to examine the qualities and blemishes of our intent. This leads me to a probing question, “As a disciple of Jesus Christ, how can I use my heart and my mirror to help me lose self?” A mirror used to see myself is less useful than a mirror that is used to see the Savior.

The prophet Alma, after having taught about being spiritually reborn, offers a few important questions to consider. Speaking of the Lord he asked, “Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts? ... I say unto you, can ye look up to God at that day with a pure heart and clean hands? I say unto you, can you look up, having the image of God engraven upon your countenances?” (Alma 5:14, 19) In order to be a true disciple and be spiritually reborn, we must tie our actions to our faith. Our intent will be reflected in what we do. More importantly, this change of heart cannot be temporarily received, it must be engraved if we hope to keep it. Thus if we look in the mirror and begin to see the Savior, Jesus Christ, reflected in our hearts, our intent, and our actions, we can know that a mighty change is beginning to increase our faith. This is the start, or the birth, of our spiritual growth.

Just as spiritual rebirth begins in the heart, spiritual growth continues to flow from the heart. It is the heart that needs to be mirrored. Losing self can be best accomplished by reflecting the will of God in our own will. As we change our hearts and our desires to match His, we become one with God. Jesus prayed for this as He met with His apostles at the Last Supper. Speaking to the Father, He said, “And for their sakes I sanctify myself, that they also might be sanctified through the truth. Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.” (John 17:19-21)

Speaking of the prophet Enoch and his people, Moses said, “And the Lord called his people Zion, because they were of one heart and one mind, and dwelt in righteousness….” (Moses 7:18) If we wish to be among the Lord’s people, we need to bridle our desires and our passions and align them with the Lord’s will. When we learn to control the instruments for personal revelation – the mind and the heart – and direct them towards the Lord, then we grow spiritually. It is then that we become one with God.

The Lord revealed this same principle to Joseph Smith, speaking of our focus. He said, “And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things. Therefore, sanctify yourselves that your minds become single to God, and the days will come that you shall see him; for he will unveil his face unto you, and it shall be in his own time, and in his own way, and according to his own will.” (Doctrine & Covenants 88:67-68) If we will turn our eyes, and our hearts, so that they are single to God’s glory, he will fill our souls with light. As we are filled, the light will chase the darkness from us. The Holy Spirit will be able to sanctify our hearts just as Jesus prayed. When that mighty change is complete, when we see Him, we will be like Him, because His image will be graven in our countenances.

Paul also taught, “If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, … fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let … each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” (Philippians 2:1-4)

So much depends on love. Dieter F. Uchtdorf recently taught, “Love is what inspired our Heavenly Father to create our spirits; it is what led our Savior to the Garden of Gethsemane to make Himself a ransom for our sins. Love is the grand motive of the plan of salvation; it is the source of happiness, the ever-renewing spring of healing, the precious fountain of hope.

“As we extend our hands and hearts toward others in Christlike love, something wonderful happens to us. Our own spirits become healed, more refined, and stronger. We become happier, more peaceful, and more receptive to the whisperings of the Holy Spirit.” (You Are My Hands)

If we wish to become like Jesus, then we must be willing to love like Jesus. We can lose “self” by loving people as our “self”. Then my purpose for looking in the mirror is not to see how becoming I am, but to see how I am becoming like the Savior Jesus Christ.

More often than not, we are drawn to people who are most like ourselves because it gives us something in common that we can relate to. As we draw near to the Savior, we have much more in common with those who are not like us because we begin to feel His love for them. It’s His love that we share in common. Then, as we look in the mirror, hopefully we see less of our own selves and more of His image.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Lose Your Self, Not Your Perspective

2010-05-30T17:41:00.006-06:00

There is often a difference between “being right” and “being righteous.” Wanting to be right isn’t a bad thing. This desire can stem from a desire to do good, to be obedient, and to be sure that the path we are on will take us to the right destination. It suggests that we are not only seeking good, but that we have found it, or at least some part that is worth holding on to. It may also be evidence that our faith has resulted in a knowledge of good and evil.

Our actions after we have found something good are what determine our own goodness. It is then that we find whether we match the goodness we have discovered, or if we merely admire something that is better than ourselves. I often sorrow for my own weaknesses when I have discovered the latter. Yet if I didn’t recognize this truth, I could never get past “being right” to “become" righteous.

I believe the desire for security to be innate in all of us. We want to be happy. We want to be successful, and we want the happiness we have found to continue. In order to do so, it is natural to guard what we have and what we know. We settle. We are willing to accept the little bit of success we have gained at the risk of forgetting there is much more. So, here lies the heart of the problem, and the difference between being right and being righteous. I have to be willing to ask myself a difficult question. “Am I protecting myself, my success, and my possessions, or am I protecting my ability to gain more truth?” My answer to this question should clearly define where I feel safe and show where my insecurities are.

Settling for a lesser truth can be very risky. Consider a difficult court case where a defendant is being tried for a serious offense. It is difficult to know whether the person is innocent, guilty, or merely negligent without proper evidence. If a verdict is determined too quickly based on a single piece of evidence, the judgment may not be fair. We may want to find a person either guilty or innocent, hoping for black and white clarity, when in fact the person may be some of each. I find that my imperfections put me in this camp more often than I would like. Just because I am trying to do what is right doesn’t mean I am completely right. Understanding this valuable truth will help me to turn to a more complete source. Personalizing this trial of faith will help me to understand that I have to defend truth without being personally defensive. If my own interests get in the way of the truth I am seeking, I become blinded and I stop seeing clearly.

In the coasts of Caesarea Philippi during his Galilean ministry, Jesus asked his disciples, “Whom say ye that I am?” Peter answered, “Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God. Jesus then told Peter he was blessed because he had received this witness from the Father. Immediately after, Jesus began to teach those who were with him of the things he had to do as the Christ and Savior of the World. He told them how he would suffer and be killed. Peter quickly began to rebuke him, telling Jesus that this wouldn’t happen. Jesus’ response to Peter is a little disturbing. “Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.” (Matthew 16:15-16, 22-23)

I feel for Peter. What a difficult thing to have just had a spiritual experience – to have born witness by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, to be told that the Church would be built upon the principles of revelation and priesthood keys, and that Peter himself would be given these as well as the sealing power to perform God’s work – and then to be told that you are Satan because you care not for the things that are God’s. I think if I had been in Peter’s shoes, I might have been a little confused and frightened. It would be easy to take the accusation personally without some degree of faith that Jesus was merely preparing Peter for something greater. Shortly after, Peter was given those keys as Moses, Elias, Elijah, and John the Baptist appeared to him on the mount of transfiguration. He continued to grow from grace to grace though he was not perfect. He learned how to see larger perspective through God’s eyes. He learned how to be trusted.

The struggle with self is perhaps the most difficult battle we will ever face. So much happens in the heart that goes unseen. Each of us places things that we treasure in our hearts. We make rooms for people who are important to us. We choose what we will think and how we will act by what we allow into our hearts. If we are selfish and self focused, we will savor the things of men rather than God. Yet if we enlarge our perspective so that our focus is on truth instead of our desires only, then self gets swallowed up in something greater. We become greater. Our outward beauty becomes a reflection of the change that takes place in our hearts. It demonstrates whether or not we have taken the Lord’s image into our own countenances.

Being swallowed up may sound like a negative thing, but this should not be compared to a hostile corporate takeover. Jesus invites us to come unto Him, so that we can follow Him and be with Him, He offers us a grand gift, to be a joint-heir of all that the Father has. He asks us to do what He has done. Offering ourselves up to be swallowed up in the will of the Lord is much like Jonah recognizing his mistakes, offering to be thrown off the ship only to be swallowed by the whale, and then be delivered safely. Had Jonah accepted this principle sooner, he could have swallowed his pride and been blessed instead of having to endure the stomach of a whale. Consider the sign of Jonah. (Matthew 16:4)

The prophet Abinadi foretold the difficult things Jesus would do during his ministry. Interestingly enough, it is the same thing that Jesus foretold to Peter. To King Noah he said, “And thus the flesh becoming subject to the Spirit, or the Son to the Father, being one God, suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people. … Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father.” (Mosiah 15:5-7) By yielding to the Holy Spirit and submitting our desires for sanctification and approval, we allow our will to be swallowed up in the will of the Father.

After Jesus chastened Peter, He taught him how to keep a clear perspective. He said, “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24) His disciples hadn’t seen him carry his own cross yet, but would according to his word. We may assume that they had seen others crucified along the roads of Jerusalem who had born their own cross before receiving their final sentence of death. In this symbolic act, if we take up our own cross, we may do something difficult that acknowledges the death of the natural man so that we can more properly follow the Savior. Jesus continues, “And now for a man to take up his cross, is to deny himself of all ungodliness, and every worldly lust, and keep my commandments.” (JST Matthew 16:26)

Jesus spake of His Cross and His deliverance as things that had already happened. He was obedient to the Father at every step. He also taught how we could follow him without having to make the same sacrifice, if we would just be willing to do so and then do whatever else He asks of us. The account of this story is recorded slightly different in three of the four gospels of the New Testament. Each one adds some insight to keeping a proper perspective.

In Matthew we read, “Break not my commandments for to save your lives; for whosoever will save his life in this world, shall lose it in the world to come.” (JST Matthew 16:27) Less dire than saving our lives is an attempt to save a mortgage, pay a bill, or provide for our wants and needs by breaking the sabbath or withholding our tithes and offerings from the Lord. If we are tempted to break a commandment to provide for a want, will we not be judged more harshly than if we were trying to save our lives? Still, the instruction remains not to break the commandments to save our lives. Rather than judging others for their decisions, I feel we are better off judging our own intent to see if we are trying to be right or trying to be righteous. If we are unsure, the Lord will help us to know if we ask in faith.

“For whosoever will save his life in this world, shall lose it in the world to come. And whosoever will lose his life in this world, for my sake shall find it in the world to come. Therefore, forsake the world, and save your souls….” (JST Matthew 16:27-29) Jesus’ words here have everything to do with priority. Do I give too much voice to my current needs that I forget about the tomorrow of eternity? Am I so focused on self that I lose my perspective? What am I willing to offer to make sure this does not happen? I find when I am not only willing to ask these questions, but answer them with positive action and choices, my perspective enlarges and I feel closer to the Holy Spirit.

In Mark we read, “For whosoever will save his life, shall lose it; or whosever will save his life, shall be willing to lay it down for my sake; and if he is not willing to lay it down for my sake, he shall lose it.” (JST Mark 8:37) This account reinforces that our willingness is most important. We may not have to give up everything. In fact, it is Father who wishes to give us everything, but He can only do it if our hearts are set upon Him instead of the things He wishes to give us. We have to be willing to endure and not settle for anything less than Him.

“In Luke we read, “For whosoever will save his life, must be willing to lose it for my sake; and whosoever will be willing to lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it. For what doth it profit a man if he gain the whole world, and yet he receive him not whom God hath ordained, and he lose his own soul, and he himself be a castaway?” (JST Luke 9:24-25) Jesus enlarges this understanding beyond the will of the Father to include the words of those servants who have been called to teach us and chasten us. He does not ask that we give our lives in death, but to give our lives in service as we follow the Lord’s anointed. “Therefore deny yourselves of these, and be not ashamed of me.” (JST Mark 8:40)

On another occasion, Jesus taught this same principle and said, “Remember Lot’s wife. Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.” (Luke 17:32-33) He then continued to tell them of some of the signs of the second coming, how there would be two and one would be taken and one left behind. If we wish to have oil in our lamps when the bridegroom returns for the wedding, we should be willing to put self aside and purify our hearts.

Jesus Christ has shown the way to eternal life with the Father. He has taught us the truth and has paid the price for our sins. As we partake the emblems of His atoning sacrifice, and swallow them to become part of us, we demonstrate a willingness to let him into our core, into our heart. By so doing we swallow our pride and offer up our hearts and our desires to Him. This offering is not so that we will give up, suppress, or deny those God given desires, appetites, and passions, but to allow him to purge “self” from them, making them more pure and more powerful. This sanctification of our hearts removes selfishness and makes room for Him whose love is as broad as the universe.

The hardest decisions I will ever make will take place in my heart. I tend to have more fear when I can only see the instant of now and what I have to give up. When I understand the larger picture, my judgment is clearer and I am more likely to swallow and offer willingly. Recognizing that God is the only complete source for truth and happiness helps me to turn my focus from self and keep it on Him.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Inasmuch as Ye Were Born

2010-05-23T22:35:00.003-06:00

He looked at me, and I looked back. A large smile appeared on his face and he began to bounce. His eyes were large and trusting. Though he didn’t know who I was, the little boy wrapped each of his small hands around my index fingers and pulled himself to standing position on my lap. In an instant I remembered what it was like to have a baby again as we played for about an hour.

The boy’s parents, who are good friends of mine, have had a very challenging year. Anticipating a premature birth, and then having to keep their son in the hospital for the first couple months of his life was not easy. Many, many prayers were offered for them before and after his delivery. He is the recipient of a lot of invested faith. Their experience reminds me of the instruction the Lord gave to Eve after being cast out of the Garden of Eden. “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception. In sorrow thou shalt bring forth children….” (Genesis 3:16) Yet, who can doubt that the joy and happiness, also delivered by the Lord, far outweigh the costs of arrival?

Innocence is a short season before accountability. As my friends’ son looked into my eyes, there was no fear present, only hope. He had no reason to be afraid. He has not yet been tarnished by transgression or doubt. Whenever he has a need, he simply cries and his parents take care of him. Life is simple. Yet, what is more beautiful still is the potential for him to become something so much greater. As he becomes accountable, power will be given him to choose for himself. He will be able to choose what he would like to become. A pure life is powerful, but a life that is pure by choice is more so.

If purity is such a powerful virtue, then why is temptation so appealing? Why do we sometimes doubt that obedience to God’s commandments is always the best course? We may not be willing to state this openly, but our actions show where our faith is. So much depends on our needs and how they are met.

Spencer W. Kimball said that sin is the result of “deep and unmet needs on the part of the sinner.” Each of us has divinely given needs, appetites, and desires. Our passions can be great motivations when properly controlled. But all too often, when these needs go unmet, we become impatient. When promised blessings do not arrive when hoped for, we often accept alternatives. This willingness to settle for something less than what God intended makes us both vulnerable and susceptible to temptation. When a trial is delivered instead of a needed blessing, we are tempted to doubt God’s integrity. Instead of trusting that the pain is a sign that something greater is on its way or is about to be delivered, we question why God has forgotten us.

Each time my wife delivered one of our children, she experienced a period of intense pain as she labored to get them here. As the father, I felt like I could do little but support her and watch as she experienced something that I could not take away from her. That was not my role. Instead I tried to encourage her. I held her hand and tried to comfort her. I sometimes wondered how tightly she planned to squeeze my hand as each wave of contractions became stronger and stronger. My efforts did not feel very heroic. Her endurance was.

As we become more accountable, the period in which we are allowed to cry before our needs are met may increase. Courage is required if we are to face our weaknesses with faith. We gain strength and become more like God as our abilities are tested. Each wave of trials becomes greater, as does our faith if we exercise it well. Our Father in Heaven bases each lesson, not only on our accountability, but our capability. While the duration of time before deliverance may increase, His promises do not diminish. If anything, they become more powerful because our faith becomes stronger. Thus, we have every reason to hold on a little longer until we are delivered.

Recognizing that by reason of the transgression of Adam, all mankind became carnal, sensual, and devilish by nature, we all become guilty of sin and are in need of repentance. It is an interesting irony that we become devilish to please and satisfy our bodies, when the devil who tempts us does not have a body. It is when we choose to act like him, in spite of the promises of God, that we become devilish. Whether by deliberate sin or unintentional transgression, we can only become like God when we do what he would do, and this requires correction.

After Adam was cast out of the Garden, God told Adam how his needs could best be met. He said to him, “If thou wilt turn unto me, and hearken unto my voice, and believe, and repent of all thy transgressions, and be baptized, even in water, in the name of mine Only Begotten Son, who is full of grace and truth, which is Jesus Christ, the only name which shall be given under heaven, whereby salvation shall come unto the children of men, ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, asking all things in his name, and whatsoever ye shall ask, it shall be given you.” (Moses 6:52)

After we repent and are cleansed, we are offered the precious gift that will help us see that our needs our met. We become worthy of the companionship of the Holy Ghost, who, in spite of our imperfections, will help us know what to ask for, and it then it will be given.

Consider the counsel given by the Lord to Joseph Smith. “I, the Lord, am merciful and gracious unto those who fear me, and delight to honor those who serve me in righteousness and in truth unto the end. Great shall be their reward and eternal shall be their glory.” He wants to bless us. He is only waiting for us to choose to be pure in heart as He is. “And to them will I reveal all mysteries…. Yea, even the wonders of eternity shall they know…. For by my Spirit will I enlighten them….” (Doctrine & Covenants 76:5-8, 10) Sometimes, the greatest mysteries we do not understand have to do with the trials we experience in mortality. We wonder, and we want to know what the Lord expects of us. If we are faithful, He will tell us and make His mysteries known.

After the Lord taught Adam about the Gift of the Holy Ghost, Adam asked, “Why is it that men must repent and be baptized in water?” The Lord answered Adam and said that he was forgiven of his transgression in the Garden of Eden. Because his children were conceived in a world of sin, subject to mortal conditions, “sin conceiveth in their hearts, and they taste the bitter, that they may know to prize the good.” Therefore we have to teach them to repent or they cannot inherit the kingdom of God. (Moses 6:53-57)

The Lord then teaches Adam about baptism, and the powerful symbol it is for our conversion by comparing it to the birthing process. He said, “Therefore I give unto you a commandment, to teach these things freely unto your children saying: That by reason of transgression cometh the fall, which fall bringeth death, and inasmuch as ye were born into the world by water, and blood, and the spirit, which I have made, and so became of dust a living soul, even so ye must be born again into the kingdom of heaven, of water, and of the Spirit, and be cleansed by blood, even the blood of mine Only Begotten; that ye might be sanctified from all sin, and enjoy the words of eternal life in this world, and eternal life in the world to come, even immortal glory.” (Moses 6:58-59)

Inasmuch as ye were born into the world, even so ye must be born again into the kingdom of heaven. In order to do this we need to put off the natural man and allow the carnal, sensual, and devilish desires to die. When we do, then there is sufficient room for righteous desires to flourish and thrive. The womb has only so much room for a baby to develop. Our hearts likewise only have so much room for our faith to develop when crowded by other desires. The things that are conceived in our hearts will determine our actions, and the blessings and trials that are delivered to us. Devilish desires cause the heart to contract, while righteous desires cause the heart to expand as wide as eternity.

The Lord continues, “For by the water ye keep the commandment; by the Spirit ye are justified, and by the blood ye are sanctified.” (Moses 6:60) These three pieces are very important. The commandments, justification, and sanctification are all connected and are necessary for us to receive the grace of God.

We are commanded to be baptized because, among other things, it is a symbol of our spiritual death and cleansing. The water is symbolic of the protective water that surrounded us at the time of our first birth. Coming up out of the water represents our spiritual rebirth into heaven. As we keep this commandment we are justified because we have chosen to be pure. As a witness, the Holy Spirit enters our hearts and confirms this truth. It is the presence of His influence that allows us to be sanctified through the atoning blood of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Because of his blood that was dispersed for our sins, and because of His infinite grace that covers the things we cannot do for ourselves, we may truly become clean and not just by washing with water. The washing by water, symbolic of a temporal cleansing, prepares us for a deeper spiritual cleansing.

While baptism is a temporal act, its spiritual significance is much greater. Regarding the commandments given to Adam, the Lord said, “Wherefore, verily I say unto you that all things unto me are spiritual, and not at any time have I given unto you a law which was temporal; neither any man, nor the children of men; neither Adam, your father, whom I created. Behold, I gave unto him that he should be an agent unto himself; and I gave unto him commandment, but no temporal commandment gave I unto him, for my commandments are spiritual; they are not natural nor temporal, neither carnal nor sensual.” (Doctrine & Covenants 29:34-35)

By settling for lesser alternatives to God’s blessings, we show a weakness and tendency to appease the mortal body instead of God. However, when we are obedient to the commandments of God, we show that we are willing to submit the desires of our bodies to our spirits. We also demonstrate that we are willing to submit our spirits to the will of God.

Adam yielded to temptation when he was not accountable. After he gained knowledge and hearkened to God, then he yielded to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, that member of the Godhead who will be our constant companion and guide if we are wise and choose to receive Him.

When we receive the Holy Spirit in our lives, our actions, and all of our choices, his influence will permeate our hearts. He will then expand our hearts and our capacity to love God. He will sanctify our lives so there is more room for more faith. This faith will give us the courage to endure our trials and hold out for the promised blessings of the Lord without having to settle.

We all have powerful needs. When we cry unto God with all our hearts and look to Him to receive His promised blessings, He will provide for us, and He will deliver us.

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Keeping the Garden

2010-05-16T23:06:00.002-06:00

Daily I walk
Through elder trees and newer foliage
On familiar paths that change.
Canopies of leaves extend and reach
To cover the growth that sometimes frightens.
The orchard’s fullest depth holds a mystery.
Its many rooms remain a wonder.
The Garden I keep for another
Has fruit both wild and tame.
Each tree bears fruit in its own season,
Save two.
That place in the Garden is different,
And the two trees unique.

Since its planting,
The first never ceases to furnish fruit.
It never stops bearing,
Not for a moment.
The tree has one eternal round
Of giving two gifts –
Fruit which is ripe, and that which is rotten.
Upon first picking,
The tree’s forbidden flavor
Became common knowledge.
The delicious fruit has been greatly desired
By all who have tasted
For many seasons since.

At first harvest,
The second likewise experienced a change.
In place of always providing
This tree is continually ripening.
Closer and closer, the fruit, white and pure,
Nigh to ready,
Seems just out of reach.
Whether by knowledge,
Passed on in story,
Or due to lack of availability,
The fruit of the tree,
So full of life,
Is declared most desirable above all.

Between the two trees
An empty spot lingered;
Ground most fertile, and peculiar, perhaps.
If these others should bear
So very uniquely,
I wondered,
What could happen, if only by chance,
That I experiment with a third?
Desire worked in me.
My thoughts made room for hope.
Carefully placed, I set a small seed,
Which I thought
to be mustard.

Presumption took hold.
I qualmed and I doubted.
This Garden, not mine, was mine but to tend.
Still I questioned
If my small effort, insignificant at best,
Could possibly anger the one for whom
This Garden I kept.
With desire to equal both neighboring trees,
I settled, and decided
To watch and to wait.
I nourished, and tended, and kept.
And then I was angered.
What I saw was not what I thought.

Two trees stood,
Each flanking my spot.
They were majestic and strong,
Ideal for the ground
So fertile and willing.
But mine,
Twisted and gnarled, not slender or strait,
Had come from the dust,
Much smaller, and weaker.
I was less hopeful.
Perhaps it wasn’t the Garden soil after all.
The tree seemed disappointing,
My efforts vain.

Were it not for the notice
I gave to the leaves,
Which seemed to resemble the very first tree,
I should not have discovered
The fruit, a single olive,
Matching in whiteness and brilliance
The color of the ever ripening fruit.
There between trees, a third form was growing,
Finding strength from the soil
And the other two trees.
It was becoming and resembled
Another mount, another garden,
Covered in trees.

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Remembering Mother Eve

2010-05-09T23:38:00.003-06:00

I once made the mistake of using an incorrect word while trying to pay a friend a compliment. After being given some delicious fudge as a present, I told my friend that she was infamous for her fudge rather than famous. Sigh. Yes, it was embarrassing. As soon as the words had crossed my lips, I immediately knew I wasn’t going to get out of that situation easily. I had really good intentions, but the compliment never arrived. Unfortunately, every time I think about the fudge she and her husband made for me, I also think about my faux pas. The two seem inseparable. A really good thing was tainted by my error.

Similar to my experience, I often wonder how well the world receives the gift that was given to us by our Mother Eve, because of her transgression. After Adam and Eve were commanded not to eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, Lucifer beguiled our mother and she “saw that the tree was good for food, and that it became pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make her wise….” Based on what she knew at the time, “she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and also gave unto her husband with her, and he did eat.” (Moses 4:12)

Immediately following their meal, the eyes of Adam and Eve were opened. Not only did they realize that they had been naked, they knew they had not responded to God’s warning and they hid out of fear. I find it interesting that they tried to hide the nakedness of their skin as well as the openness of their disobedience. But that is another subject, entirely. They found inadequate cover for both and then the Lord provided a better solution. Once they were prepared, they were driven out from the garden.

It may be too easy to judge our first parents based on appearances. Adam and Eve were disobedient, but they were not fully accountable without a prior knowledge and understanding of good and evil. They transgressed, yes, but they did not sin. However, their choice to eat the fruit introduced the potential for sin into the world and made it possible for them and their children to be tested. Both Adam and Eve discovered the effects of their decisions and suffered for them. And yet, while there was a cost to be paid, both were glad for their choice afterward. Eve said, “Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.” (Moses 5:11) While she did not possess knowledge before, she recognized afterward that her choice, though it would come with a cost, would be worth it.

In Prince Caspian, of the Chronicles of Narnia, C. S. Lewis wrote about this peculiar dichotomy. Near the end of the story, Aslan the Lion tells Prince Caspian of his less than reputable ancestral line. Prince Caspian then wishes that his lineage were less tainted. Aslan replies to Caspian, "You come of the Lord Adam and the Lady Eve…. And that is both honor enough to erect the head of the poorest beggar, and shame enough to bow the shoulders of the greatest emperor on earth. Be content." Disobedience may not be honorable, but good should not be discredited due to a lack of perfection.

As I have thought about Adam and Eve’s decision that brought both sin and happiness into the world, I have discovered some beautiful lessons that are worth honoring and not forgetting.

Fidelity in Marriage
While Adam and Eve lived in the garden, God commanded that they stay together and that Eve remain with her husband. (Moses 4:18) The same applies to Adam. While there weren’t a lot of other options in the garden, other than to not be close, their faithfulness to each other is largely the reason that Adam was persuaded to eat of the fruit. After leaving the garden, nothing else had preeminence for Adam and Eve, except for God. If couples struggling with marital issues today would remember the counsel given by God, “Therefore shall a man … cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh,” (Moses 3:24) and “thy desire shall be to thy husband,” (Moses 4:22) many marriages could be saved. It is when we turn our hearts away that we are in the most danger.

Raising Families
God has a great love for mothers. Of all the titles he could have chosen for Eve, mother was the most important. “And Adam called his wife’s name Eve, because she was the mother of all living; for thus have I, the Lord God, called the first of all women, which are many.” (Moses 4:26) Adam called his wife Eve, but Moses makes it clear that the title, “mother of all living,” originated with God. Because of her choice, God also told Eve,” I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception.” (Moses 4:22) While bearing children would not be easy, and raising them would be difficult, Eve recognized that we are meant to have joy, and so much of that joy comes from having children, teaching them the ways of the Lord, and enjoying with them the blessings that come from obedient living.

Seeking Help through Prayer
“And Adam and Eve, his wife, ceased not to call upon God.” (Moses 5:16) Raising a family is a lifelong effort with many unknown variables that can influence our happiness. With so much out of our control or experience, we would be wise to call upon God for help to raise His children. When we lack wisdom, He is willing to give us help liberally if we ask in faith. (James 1:5) After they were driven from the garden, Adam and Eve began to call “upon the name of the Lord, and they heard the voice of the Lord from the way toward the Garden of Eden, speaking unto them, and they saw him not; for they were shut out from his presence.” (Moses 5:4)

Again, it is easy to judge the tone of this verse by its conclusion, as though it were a bad thing. Remembering that the decision of all of us in the grand council in heaven was to leave Father’s presence so that we could be tested, we should not condemn Adam or Eve for their choice. They chose to do what we all chose to do, which is to learn by being tested. When we have faith, and repent of our sins, it is as though we never sinned.

The important lesson for me is that Adam and Eve continued to listen to the voice of the Lord God, even when they could not see him. They prayed. He answered. Praying with faith is important if we seek the Lord’s help. However, following the answers He gives us to our prayers is just as important. Adam and Eve set a clear example for us to follow.

Teaching from the Scriptures and by the Holy Ghost
After the Holy Ghost came upon Adam and Eve, they “blessed the name of God, and they made all things known unto their sons and daughters. (Moses 5:12) “And thus the Gospel began to be preached, from the beginning, being declared by holy angels sent forth from the presence of God, and by his own voice, and by the gift of the Holy Ghost.” (Moses 5:58) “and a book of remembrance was kept, in the which was recorded, in the language of Adam, for it was given unto as many as called upon God to write by the spirit of inspiration; and by them their children were taught….” (Moses 6:5)

What a beautiful thing to realize that as many of Adam and Eve’s children who chose to pray to God were given answers that were worth remembering and recording. All they had to do was ask. They then passed on what they had learned to their children.

Each of us has the opportunity to be taught directly by the Holy Ghost. Those who are confirmed after baptism are invited and directed to receive the Holy Ghost. He is ready to teach us as long as we are ready to listen and follow.

Becoming Like God as We Choose to Follow Him
Knowing that we, each of God’s children, would fall to temptation and the conditions of mortality, our Father provided a Savior, even Jesus Christ, who would redeem us from the fall. The prophet Lehi taught that this redemption makes us free. Because we are not bound to the conditions of death that were introduced by eating the forbidden fruit, we are free to choose the pathway of our future.

Lehi taught, “Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself. And now… I would that ye should look to the great Mediator, and hearken unto his great commandments; and be faithful unto his words, and choose eternal life, according to the will of his Holy Spirit….” (2 Nephi 2:27-28)

I may wonder at why things happened they way they did, or if there could have been another way. Then I content myself to remember that “all things have been done in the wisdom of him who knoweth all things. Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.” (2 Nephi 2:24-25)

The greatest happiness in our lives comes when we choose to be like God. We choose to become like Him when we choose good over evil. No matter how small the decision, each choice will carry us closer to or further from God. What a gift this choice is! Every day we, like our mother Eve, are able to experience the lessons God has prepared for us, all because she wanted to be like Him, knowing good from evil. Knowing is not enough, but having faith is. If I ever get to meet mother Eve on the other side of the veil, I am hoping to save a special heartfelt compliment for her. I am so grateful that she made a choice that make all of my choices possible. Did she ever regret her decision? No, and neither do I.

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