Then Shall Thy Light Break Forth as the Morning

You might say I have been fortunate to see several beautiful sunrises the last couple weeks. Or perhaps you might think that I haven’t had enough good fortune to sleep in as often as I would like. In turn I might say it depends on how you look at it.

A week ago I found myself discovering what it is like to watch the clock through the night when you can’t get to sleep. This is a rare thing for me. I was camping near the Utah/Wyoming border and I knew it would be cold at night. However, I was not prepared for the severe temperature swings as hot days would descend to freezing conditions after dark. Consequently, my body would not accommodate my fatigue and I spent the entirety of one night walking and thinking.

Just before dawn, I noticed that some of the stars were disappearing. They had been my only friends during the night, and they seemed to be fading – a condition that occurs every morning when dark yields to dawn. The change is so gradual, though, that I only notice if I am looking. I was sad to see familiar constellations slowly vanish.

I don’t remember why the night always seems coldest before dawn. I only know I have experienced it enough not to question the principle. While I’m sure it has been explained to me before, the logic still escapes my memory. As I stood in a meadow of sage brush with a blanket wrapped around my shoulders and coat beneath, I looked to the horizon, waiting. It was a prayerful moment for me, perhaps one that I will never forget. Not only was I awaiting the renewed warmth of morning, I was also considering some things that I had recently given up.

As the sun approached the skyline from behind the distant mountains, the lower sky began to glow brighter and brighter until the first sharp glimpse of the sun demanded my attention and announced the dawn of a new day. The brilliant sliver of light, often described as the crack of dawn, was visible but was not quite enough to illuminate the ground. I could see it in the distance, but the ground remained in shadow. Slowly, as the sun mounted the sky, the light touched the ground where I stood. Simultaneously, deeper shadows also appeared long and thin across the landscape. It was as though night made one last attempt to cast dark around me and then was forced to retreat. Within moments, I could feel warmer air around me. I eventually folded my blanket and removed my coat. Was I tired? Yes. Very. But, oh, how beautiful that morning was to me.

I have recently been pondering the writings of Isaiah where he described a gospel principle in a similar way. Though his words have been on my mind extensively for a couple weeks, I didn’t see the comparison until this morning. I may have given up a night of sleep, or other things that were important to me, but Isaiah has sharpened my focus as to why I should sacrifice.

You might say that the writings of a prophet like Isaiah are confusing. Or perhaps you find his words to be poetic and beautiful. In turn I might say, it depends on how you look at it. But you won’t know until you look.

Isaiah spoke of personal sacrifice through the law of the fast as a source of tremendous and needed blessings. In Isaiah 58:6-7, Isaiah speaks for the Lord who said, “Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke? Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh?”

In these two verses, Isaiah teaches us that there is great personal power and strength for others when we are willing to give up something that we need very much. The Lord has prepared and chosen the law of the fast to help us overcome weaknesses, trials, illness, and other afflictions. In the process of trusting the Lord and seeking His help, we can also be the means of helping others in the process. But you won’t know until you look for them.

A common practice when fasting is to abstain from food or drink for two meals and then give the portion that would have been consumed, or the equivalent in what we would have spent on that food, to those who are in need. Bishops are entrusted with the responsibility to collect this excess and then care for the poor and needy. Our simple offerings can do much to help others in need. It is when we do this that we receive the blessings promised by Isaiah in verses 8-12 of the same chapter.

“Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy rereward. Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am.”

The light that breaks forth for us in the morning is more welcome after a long night. Jesus Christ is the light that we should seek. He can give us sight when we are blind and warmth when we are cold. He will enlighten our minds through the Holy Ghost and give us comfort. These are some of the promised blessings when we honor the letter and intent of the law of the fast. Our meager offerings will go before us and will bring additional blessings. The Lord will cover our efforts and the places we may fall short. What a blessing it is to know that God does hear and answer the prayers of those who believe in Him.

God has also promised blessings to those who obey. Note the conditions and blessings in the following if/then statement: “If thou take away from the midst of thee the yoke, the putting forth of the finger, and speaking vanity; And if thou draw out thy soul to the hungry, and satisfy the afflicted soul; then shall thy light rise in obscurity, and thy darkness be as the noonday: And the Lord shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not. And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in.”

I have found all too often that I trip on my own roadblocks; I set up my own obstacles. I place an undue yoke upon my shoulders when I doubt and instead rely upon my own strength. Truly it is vanity when I attempt to find happiness on a road that does not lead there. I may as well search for more light in the darkness with a vain expectation of finding it. Sadly, we often create our own darkness through the choices we make. Then we look for the dawn, wondering when it will come.

If we listen to Isaiah, we will take away our self-imposed yokes. We will remove the veil of vanity and unbelief. We will then turn to those who are less fortunate and see to their needs. Then will our light rise out of obscurity. Then will our paths be restored with a clearer vision of what we need to do to keep the light in our lives.

For me the intent of the law of the fast is for me to give up something I need very much to show my dependence and trust in the Lord. As my physical strength is lessened, I have to turn to God for spiritual strength to sustain me. This very small act reconditions us and trains us to do difficult things. It helps us gain mastery over our own wants and needs. We then grow in confidence as virtue garnishes our thoughts and our hearts are filled with charity for others. Each time I transfer my selfish energy towards helping someone else in need, I take a step closer to becoming like the Savior, Jesus Christ.

Fasting helps us find the strength within to go without. For me, going without can have two meanings. We can go without the things we need to sharpen our attention towards spiritual things. We can also go without, or outside ourselves, to help others with their wants and needs. This action brings blessings to us and those we serve. Both meanings will often require added strength to accomplish.

I also believe that fasting alone is not enough. With a wry smile, I tell my children that fasting without a purpose is just starving. Our attitude can make all the difference. When we fast with the right intent, and our prayers provide added purpose, miracles can happen.

When Jesus returned from the mount of transfiguration with Peter, James, and John, he found the other nine apostles a bit discouraged. They had tried to help a man cast a spirit out from his son. The apostles had failed and asked Jesus why they could not help the man’s son. Jesus replied in Matthew 17:20-21, "Because of your unbelief.... Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting." Not only did he teach them that prayer and fasting can increase our faith, it can also give us added strength to do the things God has commanded us to do. I may not be possessed of an evil spirit, but there are times I allow myself to be controlled by a spirit of fear. That mood or temperament can similarly be dispelled by honoring the intent of the law.

I think it may be worth pondering other ways that we might apply the principle of fasting in our lives – ways in which we might give up something we want or need to bless the life of someone else. Fasting is yet another principle with promise.

You might say that fasting feels like a task to be endured. Or perhaps you have found that it is a better experience than you once thought. In turn, I might say, it depends on how you look at it. If we look to meet the intent, then shall thy light break forth as the morning. I don’t know that you can fully appreciate a sunrise until you have seen it for yourself. How blessed we are when it comes.


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Okay, I Give In

What is the hardest thing you have ever done in your life? I have thought about this question a lot the last two weeks, both on my trip to the Philmont Training Camp and on a pioneer trek experience I returned from yesterday. I was recently reminded by David Beck that we need to help our youth do hard things. When we do hard things, we gain confidence and strength. Thinking about how I will help my kids to do hard things has made me consider my own mountains.

Years ago when I was making up my mind about what I wanted to be when I grew up, I had a dream of being a teacher like my father and my grandfather. At the time I proposed to my wife, I didn’t have a job and I didn’t have any immediate prospects. I think she had a lot of faith accepting my proposal without a definite plan in sight of how I would provide for her. Maybe she trusted me because there are a number of teachers in her family, too.

One definite advantage of my career choice was the benefit of having a lot of time with my family. The opportunity to take a few months off each summer and spend time with them really appealed to me. I also had fond memories of when my Mom and Dad were both home in the afternoon when I was. We had a modest income that you might expect for school teachers, but my growing up years were rich with the time I was able to spend with my parents. I wanted that for my kids.

Shortly after my wife and I were married, I experienced a disappointment regarding my career plans. I went through some training, had a student teaching experience, and realized that my choice wasn’t going to work out the way I thought. I was discouraged. Feeling the weight of providing for a family, I began to look at other alternatives. The hardest thing for me to give up was the ability to give my family the lifestyle that I had had. As I chose another career, I recognized that I had still gotten much of what I wanted, it just required a different path.

Another desire I had at that time in my life was to serve the Lord. After completing a full-time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I wanted more – I wanted to do more for the Lord because I was so grateful for what He had done for me. Unfortunately, I had little to offer. While I may have had the interest and motivation, I did not have much else I could bring to the table. It was then that I began to be taught by Father about sacrifice.

You have to have something before you can give it away. I realized at that point in my life that I had very little experience to offer. It was then that I decided on two things that would shape my career, my life, and my family. I needed gain some skills that would support my family and be something that I could offer Father when needed so that I could help with His work. Secondly, I felt as though I needed to do something that I could be passionate enough about that one day it would be meaningful enough to sacrifice.

Since then, I have a hard time thinking of sacrifice in terms of merely giving something up. Whenever I have sacrificed something that I have needed, or wanted very badly, I have been blessed with more than I ever gave up. Each time Father requires something of me, it has been difficult. But I have learned that the sacrifice is never without reward. “Sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven.” (Hymn 27, "Praise to the Man”) Recognizing this repeating pattern in my life has allowed me greater strength to do hard things, to give up things that I really want. When I feel that Father in Heaven wants me to give up something, and I feel the confirmation of the Holy Ghost, I just remind myself that something better must be around the corner. I have seen my temporal circumstances improve. I have also seen relationships improve. Father really knows what is best when He asks us to do something. Everything He does is for our benefit and progression. I now see sacrifice as a test with promise rather than an exercise in restraint.

I believe there is a big difference in giving up and giving in. The first expression may suggest quitting, stopping, or holding back any effort because the goal is no longer worthy of pursuit. “Giving in” may imply submission and a continued effort in a different direction. I occasionally remind myself to “submit rather than forfeit.” If I am not willing to submit to the will of Father I may forfeit the blessings He is waiting to give me.

King Mosiah taught his people an important truth about our natures. We are not inclined to give up things that we need or want. This makes it easier to trust in ourselves, our appetites, and our interests than it is to trust in the Lord. In Mosiah 3:19 he taught, “For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” The word yield is so critical here. It does not mean stop, it merely implies giving the right of way to something more important, particularly the promptings of the Holy Ghost. It is at that moment that we become something greater than we currently are.

I know that God cannot lie. Further I know that he can and does speak to us and that he will not lead us astray. Because I know this to be true, I can know with surety that when the Holy Spirit speaks to my heart and asks me to put aside something of value to me, it is the best thing I can possibly do. If I do, I know I will be happier. I don’t usually see the clarity of the decision when I am making it, but I have learned to trust Him. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and I know He truly loves His children.

Another ancient prophet, Mormon, taught that we should lay hold upon every good thing. In Moroni 7:19 he said, “Wherefore, I beseech of you, brethren, that ye should search diligently in the light of Christ that ye may know good from evil; and if ye will lay hold upon every good thing, and condemn it not, ye certainly will be a child of Christ.” It stands to reason that our hands can only hold so much at any given time. How can we possibly lay hold on every good thing unless we are willing to let go of that which we currently have, be it our sins, our pride, our vanity, or even our worthy interests and desires. God rewards the faithful who let their faith guide their actions.

We each have hard things to do. This week I made one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make. I am sure there will be harder and harder choices for me as there are for each of us. I am just grateful to know that Father is always right. He has never been wrong. My faith in that principle makes it much easier to give in.

A Seashell with My Name on It

I have been fascinated by seashells for as long as I can remember. About a year ago I posted some thoughts about a seashell that my dad had left for me to find in an overcoat. (http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/2008/08/seashells-and-overcoats.html) Daily I would locate the shell, rub its worn and grooved surface between my fingers, and then put it back. The shell became a reminder of our relationship. In my post I also acknowledged similar seashells that Father in Heaven has left for me to find. After a friend of mine asked for some examples, I thought I would share a few more thoughts on the subject. But first, I want to be clear on what a seashell is and what it is not.

If you have ever walked along an ocean beach that is full of sand, you may have pondered where it all came from. Much of the sand used to be seashells but has since worn down. There are so many pieces of individual sand that they become a collective texture rather than separate objects. I feel that way about blessings in my life – there are so many that it is easy for me to take them for granted. I think it would be an incredible task to try and count every single grain of sand, yet they are known to Father.

Different from sand, there are the pearls of life that are seldom found on a beach. They must be sought for as they are carefully guarded and protected. Once found, they are beautiful to behold from every angle. The round surface reflects its surroundings in a new way. They are worth finding, admiring, and even acquiring.

Seashells, however, are uniquely different from sand or pearls. Once the home for something else, the shell is but a remnant. It is something that was carefully prepared, placed, and worn by time until its rounded edges can be picked up, acknowledged, and appreciated. Many times the only cost to find a seashell is discovery. We have only to look in the right places.

For me, the shells that have been left by Father for me to find may be a unique experience that remind me of a divine heritage. They may be an answer to prayer at the right moment, leaving no doubt in my mind that Father is listening. Sometimes seashells might be a friend at a pivotal point in my life that made all the difference. But one thing that makes them stand out is that they are not typically an immediate response. Like the shells on the sand, they were prepared, placed, and then patiently given some time until they could be appreciated as something special.

One interesting example of such a shell is the small plates of Nephi found in the Book of Mormon. Nephi felt prompted to keep an account of his teachings in addition to his primary record. In 1 Nephi 9:5-6, he said, “"Wherefore, the Lord hath commanded me to make these plates for a wise purpose in him, which purpose I know not. But the Lord knoweth all things from the beginning; wherefore, he prepareth a way to accomplish all his works...." Nephi did not know that part of his translated record would one day be lost. I wonder at the despair that Joseph Smith must have felt when a trusted friend lost the manuscript of Nephi’s record, because of vanity and unbelief. In contrast, what an overwhelming feeling of comfort he must have felt when he continued translating, only to find that Mormon had included the small plates of Nephi with his abridgement of the records of his people. Similar to Nephi, Mormon said in Words of Mormon 1:7, “And I do this for a wise purpose; for thus it whispereth me, according to the workings of the Spirit of the Lord which is in me.”

I believe that each of us may discover similar seashells in our own lives if we look for them. I could tell you a story of how my wife and I met, or how we came to buy our current home. I could also describe how we acquired this car, that job, or passed through a unique trial only to find a new friendship. Each of these has been a special shell that Father has carefully placed with purpose. Some shells are too personal to share, but I feel that is something we all have in common. They are there, ready to be discovered.

This past week, I found a small and simple shell I think worthy of sharing to demonstrate a point. I had taken my family to Philmont in Cimarron, New Mexico, a Boy Scout leadership training camp. At the first of the week, I had received a small name badge. I was excited to keep it as a small memento of the experience. However, not long into the week the badge had fallen to the ground without my notice and was lost.

For practical reasons, I had hoped to find the badge quickly because I didn’t want to be the only one who had to keep telling my name because I couldn’t hold on to my badge. Sigh. I looked without success and decided to pray. It was an awfully small thing to pray for, but I have learned that Father cares more about our faith than the thing we are praying for. I have also been very grateful that Father does in fact answer our prayers.

To no avail, I did not find the badge, nor did anyone else to my knowledge. The week went on and I made due without it. And, yes, I did have to repeat my name a few extra times. At the conclusion of the week, I and my family packed our gear and we headed for home. We were just leaving the training camp when a man came running after us. Marlin, was a friend I had made earlier in the week. When we stopped he handed me my name badge and told me what had happened. He had been eating breakfast in a dining hall when another man came in asking if anyone knew me because he had found my name badge. My friend acknowledged that he did, took the badge, and came to look for us only to find that we were gone. Realizing that we had just left, he ran through the camp to reach us. Luckily, he succeeded.

I thanked my friend for his kind efforts to go the extra mile (or at least a few hundred feet.) Had he been ten seconds later, we would have missed him completely. I smiled, thinking what a trivial thing a name badge is. Once again, Father had answered a simple prayer. It was at the very last moment possible, I think, to prove a point. Father rewarded a simple prayer and a little faith with a little badge. At that moment, I realized that the experience was no longer about the badge. It was about a Father who cares about me, and about all of His children. It was a small reminder that He is waiting for us to come home.

Small experiences like this renew my interest to hunt for shells on the beach, especially the ones with my name on them.

Admiring and Acquiring

A friend and I were walking through an art gallery a few years ago when we noticed a glass sculpture of a woman wearing a cloak. The vague figure was positioned on a pedestal and stood about two feet taller than its base. The abstract sculpture was created by stacking layers of glass; the green edges of the glass gave it the appearance of jade. I would pass by it to look at other work only to find myself returning again and again to admire the piece. I realized that I liked the sculpture enough to consider purchasing it. Then I looked at the price. I think it was worth just over $4,000, but it was money I didn’t have. Perhaps that is a good thing.

I was really disappointed on a couple of levels. I knew I could easily enjoy that particular sculpture for a long time and wouldn’t get bored of it. I also knew it would likely not be in the gallery very long. As I thought, it was only there a few weeks and then it was gone. Feeling sad that I couldn’t afford the piece I admired, I later bought a small print that was a percent of the cost I had first considered. It wasn’t the same, but it was something.

Numerous times since then I have admired other things enough to consider acquiring them. Most of the time I don’t purchase them, but I sure want to. Other times I have thought the purchase important enough to save up for months and then follow through. Regardless of the size of the purchase, I always find it more tempting go through with a purchase when I have the means to do it. Sometimes it is not a matter of whether I should, but whether or not I can.

I have since tried to consider what causes me to admire and eventually acquire something. After discussing the matter with my wife and some friends, I have come to a few conclusions.

Personally I tend to admire things that improve my quality of life. I like beautiful things that are well designed. More specifically, I like things that inspire me, or connect me with something else, be it a memory, a relationship, or sometimes an idea. There is great value to me in a painting or a book that can connect me with an emotion or a thought, a connection that can take me some place that I might not otherwise go.

A few months ago, the friend I first spoke of acquired a painting that we are both fond of. It is the contemporary work of a local artist, Hyunmee Lee. The painting is now hung on a large lobby wall at the office where we work. Each time I walk by the painting I admire it, largely because it inspires me to think beyond the ordinary. I appreciate it for its simplicity and richness. In a theoretical way, it inspires me to give more depth to my own creative work. I want to move past the superficial and cut to the essence. Briefly put, it helps me get to a more creative frame of mind quicker. It creates a connection with a deeper meaning that improves my work. In this way, the painting connects me with a source of inspiration and allows me to become something I currently am not. When this happens on a regular basis, the object has the potential of improving and enhancing my life. While I admire the painting, it is the connection to greater meaning that captivates my attention.

My wife has a different but essential approach to improving our quality of life. Many of the things she admires enough to acquire are practical in nature – things that make life better by simplifying. Her acquisitions tend to reduce the amount of time she needs to spend on certain tasks. This allows her to spend more time on things that have greater meaning, such as our family. Having the right tools to complete regular tasks in less time can mean more time together. This allows us to build memories and experiences that we will have the rest of our lives.

An additional reason for acquiring earthly things is to meet our personal needs. Because those needs can vary so widely for each individual, the question of when to acquire something may also be better answered by the individual. I would prefer not to judge another’s needs or circumstances. But knowing that needs can often change, and are sometimes insatiable, I believe it is worth some introspection to evaluate when we should and shouldn’t acquire. I occasionally watch my personal wants slide into the needs category. I can also come up with some pretty good arguments, when I want to, as to why they should. However, I also recognize that sometimes you just can’t let yourself want the things you want.

Joseph Smith stated in the thirteenth article of faith, “If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” The word seek also merits some personal reflection. What does it mean for us to seek? While seeking can often mean acquiring, in some cases looking and searching may be sufficient. At other times the word “seek” may imply emulation. If we are clear on what our needs are, and how we may best meet them, we may not be required to acquire as much as we think.

Whether we acquire or simply admire, it is in our natures to connect ourselves with other things. Material possessions are not our only pursuit. We may seek friendship, mutual understanding, or even knowledge. Regardless of our pursuit, we should remember that in mortality, we can’t connect to everything. We have to choose. We choose our relationships, and our possessions. We have to choose how we spend our time.

Whatever your reasons may be for admiring something or someone, I believe the potential for satisfaction increases greatly when we are deliberate in our decisions. Making a choice because it is the default option or a matter of habit is often the non-choice. Making a decision because it is the right decision is much easier to defend.