As a high school sophomore, I remember one particular class where we were studying anatomy in seminary. It was the heart. The lesson had a profound effect on me. We were studying the Old Testament when the Lord was guiding the prophet Samuel to find a replacement for Saul as the king of Israel. Saul made a serious mistake and was not obedient to the commandments of the Lord. He did what he thought he should by offering sacrifice, but it was in vain. It was Saul’s heart that the Lord was concerned about.
After Saul’s disobedience, the Lord told Samuel to visit the house of Jesse, from whom he had chosen the next king. Samuel met each of the sons of Jesse and received confirmation from the Lord that David, the youngest, was the one the Lord had chosen, for he was a man after the Lord’s own heart. (1 Samuel 13:14, Acts 13:22) In this decision, the Lord told Samuel, “Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; … for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)
As a young man I considered how I might apply this principle to myself and decided to focus less on my outward appearance and worry more about other things. In my attempt to follow the scripture and avoid vanity, I missed part of the principle. At the time, vanity meant placing too much focus on looks or appearance. It wasn’t until much later that I understood that vanity, or doing something in vain, referred to more than appearance. It can also refer to an attempt or action that has little effect, avail, or significance. In this sense, one who is excessively concerned about their appearance may spend a large amount of time improving their looks without a long-lasting benefit. They may have little to show for their investment of time and worry. Perhaps their vanity is not just in their appearance, but in their unwise use of time.
Vanity can also refer to an incorrect attempt or a wasted effort. Saul thought he was doing good by offering sacrifice to the Lord. Unfortunately, in his efforts to please the Lord, he caused offense. After his missed attempt, Saul admitted fear and confessed to listening to the people instead of the Lord. His efforts were of no avail because he didn’t follow the Lord’s instructions. His vain attempts lost the aid of the Lord and cost him the kingdom.
Like Saul, many of David’s efforts to serve the Lord were also frustrated. He did many great things for the kingdom of Israel but lost his own exaltation because of his passions. A lifetime of good choices was suddenly wasted and in vain because of a few unrestrained desires.
Another type of vanity is associated with one of the Ten Commandments. While growing up, I was taught by my parents and church leaders not to take the name of the Lord in vain. I knew there were certain ways that God’s name should be used, and certain ways in which it should not. That seemed fairly clear and easy to follow. I was grateful for good examples that showed me how. I avoided profanity because I had been taught to do so.
I was also taught that profanity included the use of other bad words that were not uplifting. Grouping good words and bad words together under the umbrella of profanity didn’t make a lot of sense. I just knew it was something I wasn’t supposed to do. Later I realized that the definition of the word profane was to take something sacred and make it common or vulgar. I think many of the other words I was taught not to use were profane because they were either mixed with things that were sacred, or they were used to describe God’s children in a way that depreciated their divine value.
At times I have wondered why it is that some words are bad and some are acceptable when they have the exact same meaning. I have questioned who had the job to judge the appropriateness of each word. The conclusion I came up with is that some things are merely tradition. I also believe that traditions are only worth continuing if they have meaning. One might argue that a tradition that has no meaning is vain. I decided for myself that some of the acceptable words I had been using were no longer acceptable to me, solely on the basis that they had the same meaning and use in language as their vulgar counterparts. Simply put, swear words have more to do with the meaning and intent than the way it is spelled. Substitute words still have the same meaning. If the meaning is vulgar or profane, then perhaps it is worth questioning its use.
There is an interesting relationship between vanity and profanity when we compare the commandment to not take the name of God in vain with the covenants we renew with the sacrament. When we take the emblems of the bread and water in remembrance of Jesus, we also covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ. It is possible to profane this holy ordinance should we choose to participate in vain.
Taking Jesus’ name is not just a token gesture. This is a serious commitment. It demonstrates our acknowledgement of his supernal sacrifice which makes it possible for us to overcome the effects of sin and spiritual death. Doing so also demonstrates our willingness to change our lives and live as he did. This willingness to change represents a spiritual rebirth in which Jesus becomes our father through His atonement. Taking His name upon us is no different than taking on the surname of an earthly parent. If we do so without the intent to keep our covenants or become like him, then we do it in vain, making His atonement of little effect in our lives. With the enlarged definitions of vanity and profanity, the commandment to not take the Lord’s name in vain describes more than how we use or revere His name. It also describes how we use or revere the sacrifice of His own life that he made for all of God’s children.
The prophet Nephi used other words to describe the sacrilege of vanity and profanity. “For the things which some men esteem to be of great worth, both to the body and soul, others set at naught and trample under their feet. Yea, even the very God of Israel do men trample under their feet; I say, trample under their feet but I would speak in other words—they set him at naught, and hearken not to the voice of his counsels.” (1 Nephi 19:7)
If we wish to avoid the pitfalls of poor intent, it is worth considering which of our efforts may be in vain, and which sacred things we inadvertently profane. We can ask ourselves some simple questions. In an attempt to be happy, am I making choices that will inevitably make me unhappy? Will my efforts be wasted because of a few bad choices? Do my actions reflect my beliefs or am I only following the traditions of others because that is what I am used to doing? Do I treat sacred things with proper respect and reverence? Am I ever ungrateful for special blessings that come from Father?
Because we live in a society where we are surrounded by unfruitful vanity and all-too-common profanity, it is hard for us not to be affected by it. The Lord revealed to Joseph Smith that many of Father’s children have corrupt motives, meaning that they are not pure and are fraught with vain efforts. He said “and there is none which doeth good save it be a few; and they err in many instances … all having corrupt minds.” (Doctrine & Covenants 33:4) So the question remains, “How do we navigate through the world without being affected?”
Elder Robert D. Hales of the Twelve Apostles spoke of the familiar phrase: Be in the world, but not of the world (see John 17:11, 14–17). He said, “Our mortal existence is necessary to fulfill the plan of salvation. We must therefore live in this world, but we must also resist the worldly influences that are ever before us.
“Jesus taught, “My kingdom is not of this world” (John 18:36). ... Being of the kingdom of God requires that we heed the Savior’s admonition “Follow thou me” (2 Ne. 31:10). Nephi taught that we follow Jesus by keeping Heavenly Father’s commandments: “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, can we follow Jesus save we shall be willing to keep the commandments of the Father?” (2 Ne. 31:10).
“At baptism we make a covenant with our Heavenly Father that we are willing to come into His kingdom and keep His commandments from that time forward, even though we still live in the world. We are reminded from the Book of Mormon that our baptism is a covenant to “stand as witnesses of God [and His kingdom] at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life” (Mosiah 18:9; emphasis added).
“When we understand our baptismal covenant and the gift of the Holy Ghost, it will change our lives and will establish our total allegiance to the kingdom of God. When temptations come our way, if we will listen, the Holy Ghost will remind us that we have promised to remember our Savior and obey the commandments of God.” (“The Covenant of Baptism,” Ensign, Nov 2000, p. 6-9)
The gift of the Holy Ghost then is the key to staying clean. When we make mistakes or sin, the Holy Ghost can purge our hearts and make them pure again. He will help us sanctify our hearts and turn them to the Lord instead of away from Him.
We can invite the influence of the Holy Ghost into our lives as we make choices that are consistent with God’s will. In the sacrament prayer we are promised that if we take upon us the name of Jesus Christ, always remember him, and keep his commandments which he has given us, then we will always have His spirit to be with us. (Moroni 4:3)
Understanding the full meaning of vanity and profanity can help us navigate the pitfalls and traditions that are passed on thoughtlessly. Unless we consider the larger implications of vanity, we may be guilty of only looking on the outward appearance of our actions, and not our intentions. If we don’t scrutinize our own decisions, profaning sacred moments in our lives may already be too common. However, if we turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, he will heal our hearts and purge out all of the impurities. The Holy Ghost will then have room to inspire thoughts and desires that are more fruitful and more sacred.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
What a Mess!
My wife often jokes about the physical state of her work room. Like me, she is very project oriented. We are never bored because as soon as we finish one creative project, there are a dozen other things we want to do that are jockeying in the queue. Liz’s room is filled with tangible evidence of her process. You might say that everything there is “in process.” But that’s okay. Whether it is card making, scrapbooking, stamping, sewing, or cross-stitching, she does beautiful work, and she is not afraid to make a mess.
We used to share the workroom together. Her half of the room had files and boxes of photos, paper, scissors, pens, and important pieces of history that were waiting to be absorbed into a well crafted scrapbook. Liz also had drawers and bins of fabric, patterns, and notions such as zippers, ribbon, and buttons. My half had a different mess.
For about ten years I spent a great deal of my spare time working on a supposed epic novel with a beautiful heroine as the main character. My half of the room was filled with stacks of notes, folders of pictures, reference books, and sculptures. The walls were covered with sketches, story boards, illustrations, maps, and ideas. I had developed histories, family lines, and cultural definitions. I was completely immersed in plot and character development. Well… I was immersed whenever I entered the room. It was perfect for that purpose. I was surrounded by mess and process. The two went hand in hand and allowed me to learn faster than any other place. Now, however, the room is only used by my wife, and my process has been cleaned up.
The story is something that I am very passionate about. Someday I hope to get back to it. But, if I don’t, I will still be grateful for the work that I did there because the process was so valuable to me. It was a laboratory for thought that afforded me the opportunity to test out lots of ideas, both fictitious and real.
At a point in my life where circumstances changed for me, I found that I needed to put my interests on hold and I cleaned up my mess. While my hobby held my attention, my family and other obligations needed my time. So I carefully took my work down and shelved it in boxes. Certainly, it was one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I do not regret it a bit. I would make the same decision if presented to me again and again. I realized then that there is an appropriate time for messes especially when they afford a process.
In contrast to the work room, our living room is much different in character. I read there, I pray there, and it affords me a different opportunity to focus without clutter. It contains possessions that define our family. In addition to comfortable seating, there are books, paintings, photographs, and musical instruments. This room has stricter rules of what is acceptable. Yes, from time to time this room may get messy, but I do not allow it to be so for very long because it is my sanctuary. When it gets messy, it no longer seems like mine and I feel like an outsider. It is not a museum or showcase, but the living room is a place to live in. I have found that to be more easily done when there is no mess there.
It is worth considering, and recognizing, that not all messes are bad. Some messes can be helpful, and some may be a detriment. Some we can control, and others control us. I believe that when we are able to act and define our messes, we are much better off than if we are acted upon by our messes because they limit our decisions. This is another example of how the evidence at hand comes back to intent. Similarly, while a process may be messy, there is a difference between clean messy and dirty messy. Consider the following.
In Mark chapter 7, a group of Pharisees and scribes found fault and criticized Jesus because his disciples ate bread without washing their hands. They stated that it was the tradition of the elders to wash, not only their hands, but also their cups, pots, brazen vessels, and tables, or they would not eat. Jesus’ response was quite poignant as he quoted Isaiah the prophet.
“He answered and said unto them, Well hath Esaias prophesied of you hypocrites, as it is written, This people honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. … Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.” (Mark 7:6-7,9) Jesus spoke not only of hands and dishes, but of commandments that the Pharisees professed to uphold and yet broke them. He returned criticism because they were focused on lesser things instead of the things of God.
Jesus continues, “There is nothing from without a man, that entering into him can defile him, which is food; but the things which come out of him; those are they that defile the man, that proceedeth forth out of the heart. If any man have ears to hear, let him hear.” (Mark 7:15-16, JST Mark 7:15)
When His disciples could not understand Jesus’ teachings, he explained, “whatsoever thing from without entereth into the man, it cannot defile him; Because it entereth not into his heart, but into the belly….” He then lists a number of sins that proceed from the heart as evil thoughts and actions and states, “All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.” (Mark 7:18-19, 23)
Perhaps it is a stretch to talk of the messes that occur in work rooms and living rooms, and then talk of the heart. Yet the heart also has rooms in which we store and keep things. Some things we lock up, and some things we share openly. I believe the heart to be more sacred, thus making an examination of the heart more important as to which messes are process and which may be detriments.
There may be times when our hearts and minds, both, are confused. They seem to be cluttered with information, circumstances, and the cry for decisions. A true disciple of Christ will not take such decisions lightly, or dismiss them too quickly. It is important for us to study them out carefully in the light of Christ so that we can make an appropriate decision.
Mormon taught us how to examine the clutter of confusion that can exist internally. “For behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from evil; wherefore, I show unto you the way to judge; for every thing which inviteth to do good, and to persuade to believe in Christ, is sent forth by the power and gift of Christ; wherefore ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of God. ... And now, my brethren, seeing that ye know the light by which ye may judge, which light is the light of Christ, see that ye do not judge wrongfully; for with that same judgment which ye judge ye shall also be judged.” (Moroni 7:16-18)
The key to whether the clutter in our hearts is just mess or process depends how the clutter got there. If I am confused solely because I lack wisdom and am unsure of my course, the clutter would suggest that I am on the cusp of taking a leap forward in my process – the process of becoming like Father. I may have an opportunity to grow if I am prepared to deal with the situation. On the other hand, if my heart is cluttered because I have judged incorrectly in the light of Christ, and have chosen that which is wrong, then my actions will testify against me. This would suggest that I welcomed clutter into my heart and chose mess for mess’s sake. This is the largest difference between sin and mistakes. One is deliberate, the other inadvertent.
Dallin H. Oaks of the Twelve Apostles taught that while both sins and mistakes can harm us, mistakes need correction but sins require repentance. They are not the same and do not require the same process to fix. Many of our decisions can be carefully weighed against the measure of bad, good, better, and best. Elder Oaks said, “For most of us, most of the time, the choice between good and bad is easy. What usually causes us difficulty is determining which uses of our time and influence are merely good, or better, or best. Applying that fact to the question of sins and mistakes, I would say that a deliberately wrong choice in the contest between what is clearly good and what is clearly bad is a sin, but a poor choice among things that are good, better, and best is merely a mistake.” (“Sins and Mistakes,” Ensign, Oct 1996, 62) Some of the clutter in our hearts is there deliberately, but has been invited by mistake.
Usually walking into a messy room is a choice; we see what the room is like before we enter. There are times in life, however, where we find ourselves in a confusing situation and we are left to wonder, “How did I get in such a mess?” The arrival at comprehension is an odd experience, as if we have just awoken from sleep walking.
If not all messes are bad, then understanding what kind of mess we are in can be very helpful. Whether it is by choice, by mistake, or due to conditions beyond our control, it is important for us to assess so that we can determine the best course for action. Consider these questions. How do I feel about the mess? Does it feel out of control or is the mess manageable? What do I plan to do with the mess? Does it bother me? Why? Am I apathetic towards the mess, and is it easier to pretend that it’s not there than to deal with it? Do I ever think, “I should clean this up,” without the intent of actually changing or doing anything about it? Would it make any difference if someone could help me through it, or help me clean it up?
If we feel in control, we will likely have a more positive attitude towards the situation. If we can get someone to help or encourage, it may be enough to change our attitude. If we recognize what we are up against, and have a plan of action, we can better deal with the messes life delivers at our feet.
When I watch Liz make dough to bake some bread, I observe that her process is very, very messy. She spreads oil over the counter to keep the dough from sticking. She grinds wheat to make flour which causes fine dust to spread. She prepares the dough with a mixer and then kneads it with her hands. Every time, however, the counter resumes to a smooth as glass condition without a trace of the mess. Liz is in control of the process and she has gotten very fast. You can’t make bread without making a mess. At the same time, it is hard to enjoy the bread unless you have a clean place to eat it. There is a place for both.
In my line of work as an architect, I spend a lot of time on construction sites to review progress. As I observe work that is being done, I see a lot of mess, and yet it isn’t. To the inexperienced it may look like chaos. To the general contractor who is responsible for the work, there is a process by which separate materials are put together to create a refined product. Watching a design take shape from seemingly nothing is always amazing. It is very rewarding. Sometimes we have to trust that Father is both the architect who has a master design for our lives, and He is the general contractor that is directing the work, making something refined and beautiful out of seemingly nothing. Life may get dusty, but if we put our faith in His plan, things will turn out better than we can possibly imagine.
I have found that it is often when I am immersed in a messy situation that I am capable of doing the most work. If I am surrounded by mess and chaos, I begin to despair. But, if my mess is full of process and I feel in control, then I can often learn faster than I will in any other place.
I’m glad that most often my work period includes a time to clean up. Much can be learned and understood when we clean up the rooms in our homes and the rooms in our hearts. Even in circumstances when, like my interest in writing a novel, I find that it is time to put something good aside for something better or best, I have a greater appreciation of the process, and I can enjoy a place that is swept clean of distraction. Many truths are formulated during the process. Then those same truths distill and refine when the mess is gone.
Referring back to the example of the Savior with the Pharisees, and the measurement of value described by Elder Oaks, we need to be very careful that we give our best attention to the appropriate messes. If we focus on less important distractions when there are more important issues at hand, we may be guilty of having an incorrect focus. When we decide it is time to clean up our messes, it can be possible to have a clean house and yet have cluttered relationships. We may find that we are perfectionists at cleaning messes in our homes, but not our hearts. Certainly I am not advocating that we have messy homes. I do believe we need to keep our priorities clear and our focus correct.
Both our hearts and our homes have appropriate work rooms and living rooms. We have places for messes and places for serenity. When some of those messes spread and start to consume our peace, we should remember that we are the offspring of God. Father has created us in His image. He has given us the potential and the power to become like Him. We do so when we begin to see the messes for what they are and we act upon them rather than letting them act upon us. Fortunately, when we are in over our heads in mess, Father can help. We can ask Him humbly in prayer and He will respond. Much like my own children who often make mistakes and messes, both, that are larger than they can manage, a simple “please” is usually enough to get my help. Father loves us much, much more than we are capable of loving our own children. He will help take care of our messes.
Because our lives are often messy and a work in progress, it helps to have a reminder that this is by design and we have no need to fear. The exception is when we choose to make messes for mess’s sake. Keeping work in the work room, and living in the living room has worked well for me. Note that I didn’t mention my garage. There is another work in progress, but I’ll leave that for another day.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
We used to share the workroom together. Her half of the room had files and boxes of photos, paper, scissors, pens, and important pieces of history that were waiting to be absorbed into a well crafted scrapbook. Liz also had drawers and bins of fabric, patterns, and notions such as zippers, ribbon, and buttons. My half had a different mess.
For about ten years I spent a great deal of my spare time working on a supposed epic novel with a beautiful heroine as the main character. My half of the room was filled with stacks of notes, folders of pictures, reference books, and sculptures. The walls were covered with sketches, story boards, illustrations, maps, and ideas. I had developed histories, family lines, and cultural definitions. I was completely immersed in plot and character development. Well… I was immersed whenever I entered the room. It was perfect for that purpose. I was surrounded by mess and process. The two went hand in hand and allowed me to learn faster than any other place. Now, however, the room is only used by my wife, and my process has been cleaned up.
The story is something that I am very passionate about. Someday I hope to get back to it. But, if I don’t, I will still be grateful for the work that I did there because the process was so valuable to me. It was a laboratory for thought that afforded me the opportunity to test out lots of ideas, both fictitious and real.
At a point in my life where circumstances changed for me, I found that I needed to put my interests on hold and I cleaned up my mess. While my hobby held my attention, my family and other obligations needed my time. So I carefully took my work down and shelved it in boxes. Certainly, it was one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I do not regret it a bit. I would make the same decision if presented to me again and again. I realized then that there is an appropriate time for messes especially when they afford a process.
In contrast to the work room, our living room is much different in character. I read there, I pray there, and it affords me a different opportunity to focus without clutter. It contains possessions that define our family. In addition to comfortable seating, there are books, paintings, photographs, and musical instruments. This room has stricter rules of what is acceptable. Yes, from time to time this room may get messy, but I do not allow it to be so for very long because it is my sanctuary. When it gets messy, it no longer seems like mine and I feel like an outsider. It is not a museum or showcase, but the living room is a place to live in. I have found that to be more easily done when there is no mess there.
It is worth considering, and recognizing, that not all messes are bad. Some messes can be helpful, and some may be a detriment. Some we can control, and others control us. I believe that when we are able to act and define our messes, we are much better off than if we are acted upon by our messes because they limit our decisions. This is another example of how the evidence at hand comes back to intent. Similarly, while a process may be messy, there is a difference between clean messy and dirty messy. Consider the following.
In Mark chapter 7, a group of Pharisees and scribes found fault and criticized Jesus because his disciples ate bread without washing their hands. They stated that it was the tradition of the elders to wash, not only their hands, but also their cups, pots, brazen vessels, and tables, or they would not eat. Jesus’ response was quite poignant as he quoted Isaiah the prophet.
“He answered and said unto them, Well hath Esaias prophesied of you hypocrites, as it is written, This people honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. … Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.” (Mark 7:6-7,9) Jesus spoke not only of hands and dishes, but of commandments that the Pharisees professed to uphold and yet broke them. He returned criticism because they were focused on lesser things instead of the things of God.
Jesus continues, “There is nothing from without a man, that entering into him can defile him, which is food; but the things which come out of him; those are they that defile the man, that proceedeth forth out of the heart. If any man have ears to hear, let him hear.” (Mark 7:15-16, JST Mark 7:15)
When His disciples could not understand Jesus’ teachings, he explained, “whatsoever thing from without entereth into the man, it cannot defile him; Because it entereth not into his heart, but into the belly….” He then lists a number of sins that proceed from the heart as evil thoughts and actions and states, “All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.” (Mark 7:18-19, 23)
Perhaps it is a stretch to talk of the messes that occur in work rooms and living rooms, and then talk of the heart. Yet the heart also has rooms in which we store and keep things. Some things we lock up, and some things we share openly. I believe the heart to be more sacred, thus making an examination of the heart more important as to which messes are process and which may be detriments.
There may be times when our hearts and minds, both, are confused. They seem to be cluttered with information, circumstances, and the cry for decisions. A true disciple of Christ will not take such decisions lightly, or dismiss them too quickly. It is important for us to study them out carefully in the light of Christ so that we can make an appropriate decision.
Mormon taught us how to examine the clutter of confusion that can exist internally. “For behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from evil; wherefore, I show unto you the way to judge; for every thing which inviteth to do good, and to persuade to believe in Christ, is sent forth by the power and gift of Christ; wherefore ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of God. ... And now, my brethren, seeing that ye know the light by which ye may judge, which light is the light of Christ, see that ye do not judge wrongfully; for with that same judgment which ye judge ye shall also be judged.” (Moroni 7:16-18)
The key to whether the clutter in our hearts is just mess or process depends how the clutter got there. If I am confused solely because I lack wisdom and am unsure of my course, the clutter would suggest that I am on the cusp of taking a leap forward in my process – the process of becoming like Father. I may have an opportunity to grow if I am prepared to deal with the situation. On the other hand, if my heart is cluttered because I have judged incorrectly in the light of Christ, and have chosen that which is wrong, then my actions will testify against me. This would suggest that I welcomed clutter into my heart and chose mess for mess’s sake. This is the largest difference between sin and mistakes. One is deliberate, the other inadvertent.
Dallin H. Oaks of the Twelve Apostles taught that while both sins and mistakes can harm us, mistakes need correction but sins require repentance. They are not the same and do not require the same process to fix. Many of our decisions can be carefully weighed against the measure of bad, good, better, and best. Elder Oaks said, “For most of us, most of the time, the choice between good and bad is easy. What usually causes us difficulty is determining which uses of our time and influence are merely good, or better, or best. Applying that fact to the question of sins and mistakes, I would say that a deliberately wrong choice in the contest between what is clearly good and what is clearly bad is a sin, but a poor choice among things that are good, better, and best is merely a mistake.” (“Sins and Mistakes,” Ensign, Oct 1996, 62) Some of the clutter in our hearts is there deliberately, but has been invited by mistake.
Usually walking into a messy room is a choice; we see what the room is like before we enter. There are times in life, however, where we find ourselves in a confusing situation and we are left to wonder, “How did I get in such a mess?” The arrival at comprehension is an odd experience, as if we have just awoken from sleep walking.
If not all messes are bad, then understanding what kind of mess we are in can be very helpful. Whether it is by choice, by mistake, or due to conditions beyond our control, it is important for us to assess so that we can determine the best course for action. Consider these questions. How do I feel about the mess? Does it feel out of control or is the mess manageable? What do I plan to do with the mess? Does it bother me? Why? Am I apathetic towards the mess, and is it easier to pretend that it’s not there than to deal with it? Do I ever think, “I should clean this up,” without the intent of actually changing or doing anything about it? Would it make any difference if someone could help me through it, or help me clean it up?
If we feel in control, we will likely have a more positive attitude towards the situation. If we can get someone to help or encourage, it may be enough to change our attitude. If we recognize what we are up against, and have a plan of action, we can better deal with the messes life delivers at our feet.
When I watch Liz make dough to bake some bread, I observe that her process is very, very messy. She spreads oil over the counter to keep the dough from sticking. She grinds wheat to make flour which causes fine dust to spread. She prepares the dough with a mixer and then kneads it with her hands. Every time, however, the counter resumes to a smooth as glass condition without a trace of the mess. Liz is in control of the process and she has gotten very fast. You can’t make bread without making a mess. At the same time, it is hard to enjoy the bread unless you have a clean place to eat it. There is a place for both.
In my line of work as an architect, I spend a lot of time on construction sites to review progress. As I observe work that is being done, I see a lot of mess, and yet it isn’t. To the inexperienced it may look like chaos. To the general contractor who is responsible for the work, there is a process by which separate materials are put together to create a refined product. Watching a design take shape from seemingly nothing is always amazing. It is very rewarding. Sometimes we have to trust that Father is both the architect who has a master design for our lives, and He is the general contractor that is directing the work, making something refined and beautiful out of seemingly nothing. Life may get dusty, but if we put our faith in His plan, things will turn out better than we can possibly imagine.
I have found that it is often when I am immersed in a messy situation that I am capable of doing the most work. If I am surrounded by mess and chaos, I begin to despair. But, if my mess is full of process and I feel in control, then I can often learn faster than I will in any other place.
I’m glad that most often my work period includes a time to clean up. Much can be learned and understood when we clean up the rooms in our homes and the rooms in our hearts. Even in circumstances when, like my interest in writing a novel, I find that it is time to put something good aside for something better or best, I have a greater appreciation of the process, and I can enjoy a place that is swept clean of distraction. Many truths are formulated during the process. Then those same truths distill and refine when the mess is gone.
Referring back to the example of the Savior with the Pharisees, and the measurement of value described by Elder Oaks, we need to be very careful that we give our best attention to the appropriate messes. If we focus on less important distractions when there are more important issues at hand, we may be guilty of having an incorrect focus. When we decide it is time to clean up our messes, it can be possible to have a clean house and yet have cluttered relationships. We may find that we are perfectionists at cleaning messes in our homes, but not our hearts. Certainly I am not advocating that we have messy homes. I do believe we need to keep our priorities clear and our focus correct.
Both our hearts and our homes have appropriate work rooms and living rooms. We have places for messes and places for serenity. When some of those messes spread and start to consume our peace, we should remember that we are the offspring of God. Father has created us in His image. He has given us the potential and the power to become like Him. We do so when we begin to see the messes for what they are and we act upon them rather than letting them act upon us. Fortunately, when we are in over our heads in mess, Father can help. We can ask Him humbly in prayer and He will respond. Much like my own children who often make mistakes and messes, both, that are larger than they can manage, a simple “please” is usually enough to get my help. Father loves us much, much more than we are capable of loving our own children. He will help take care of our messes.
Because our lives are often messy and a work in progress, it helps to have a reminder that this is by design and we have no need to fear. The exception is when we choose to make messes for mess’s sake. Keeping work in the work room, and living in the living room has worked well for me. Note that I didn’t mention my garage. There is another work in progress, but I’ll leave that for another day.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Give or Take a Little
Sourdough muffins with vanilla, cinnamon, and crushed, roasted pecans were the surprise waiting on the small, round bistro table of my office break area this last week. On another occasion, it was a watermelon salad with onion, fennel, feta cheese, and lemon vinaigrette. One of my favorites was a bouillabaisse stew with leeks, onions, sea bass, shrimp, scallops, clams, and muscles. Usually I am not a deep sea food fan, but that one was scrumptious!
Tanni, a close friend of mine for many years, is an amazing cook. She also has a passion for interior design, floral arrangements, and landscaping. Whatever she touches turns to gold, and she has a habit of touching quite a few things, and people. Occasionally she will fix up something delicious to share with fellow workers in the office just for their enjoyment, and hers. Tanni has the ability to put a smile on someone’s face in a snap, once the aroma wafts past their senses and the presentation of her gourmet treat pleases the eye. These sensations are just the appetizers for a taste that has yet to disappoint me. She has never fixed something that I haven’t loved.
I have noticed something interesting about Tanni’s creations. Everyone is willing to sample something delicious, but not everyone is willing to reciprocate. And, really, it’s hard, because few others cook like she does. I find myself wanting to do something to return the favor, however, and not just enjoy her cooking.
Another close friend, Kerstin, has taught me a lot about sharing things of value. She has a deep passion for music and the arts. Her singing voice is beautiful, emotive, and natural. Her music is full of expression and feeling. Consequently you sense more than her voice when she sings. While she is not self-promoting, I have always found Kerstin willing to share her talents if it will help someone else. She, too, has the ability to put a smile on someone’s face as their hearts are touched by the gift that she shares. Her music is valuable because it is heartfelt and selfless. In a performance setting, I have watched her figuratively step out of the spotlight and turn the focus from herself to what she hopes the audience will feel and experience. She prefers to share a wonderful performance without taking any credit.
Recently, while we were discussing things that we have shared, Kerstin said, “Why keep tally? I don’t have a ‘fair’ chart. It really doesn’t matter whose turn it is.” I appreciate her sentiment that sharing is about giving, and not just exchange. For me, giving without attached strings reflects purer motivations. It gets closer to the heart of charity.
My wife, Liz, is a wonderful example of giving. In the fifteen years of our marriage, I don’t know that I have ever seen her pick up a hobby that didn’t involve doing something for someone besides herself. She loves to scrapbook, but mostly because she treasures the memories of our family and the growth of our children. It is exciting to see the smiles on their faces as we look through old books and remember past experiences together. Liz loves to cross-stitch and sew for other people. Whether it is an article of clothing, a costume, a quilt, or some other home furnishing, she takes great satisfaction in giving her work away. Liz is also a wonderful cook. She has a very intuitive approach that is simple, practical, and delicious. I love to smell her freshly cooked bread come out of the oven ready to receive a butter glaze. My small twinge of reluctance when she wants to give her bread away is eased by a promise that she will make more. Thank goodness she keeps her word. Knowing that each of these things take time, and that Liz values time over most things, her gifts have great value to me.
With our children, I am trying to teach them to show their mother gratitude and appreciation by helping and not just taking. The bread is delicious, and it satisfies the senses, but there are still dishes to be done, and messes to be cleaned up. I think they are learning little by little.
Each of these examples has caused me to reflect on the difference between giving and taking. Anyone can take, but not everyone is willing to give. Yet, because there are those who do give so freely, many are better for it. There is more power in giving than in taking.
Giving adds tremendous strength to any relationship. When we consider friendships and family relationships that are meant to be eternal, we can strengthen those relationships by giving of ourselves and the things that we place high value on. This is especially applicable with our relationship with God.
If we wish to live with our Father in heaven again, that reward comes with a price. Fortunately, by the grace of God, the price for our sins has already been paid. Jesus paid that price with His own blood. All that is left for us to do is to accept His gift by offering the only thing we can offer in return, namely our discipleship and obedience.
Under the Law of Moses, ancient Israelites worshipped God by offering sacrifices. They offered their best. By giving up something of great value to themselves, they demonstrated their faith and love towards God. Those who did not have the means to give a large offering would bring what they could, which might be a couple of turtle-doves instead of a lamb. This law continued until the death of Jesus Christ, which ended sacrifices by the shedding of blood as a part of worship. These ordinances were replaced by the sacrament, which was to be done in remembrance of the Lord’s body and His blood which was shed for all mankind.
Just prior to His appearance to the people in the ancient Americas following His resurrection, Jesus revealed that burnt offerings were to be done away, and that, “ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit.” (3 Nephi 9:20) While the sacrifice would no longer be completely consumed, the offering was still intended to be complete.
If we combine these two principles – first, that the burnt offerings were to be replaced by the sacrament, and second, that by so doing we are to offer a broken heart and a contrite spirit – the act would suggest that when we prepare ourselves to partake of the sacrament we should be willing to make an offering and not just take the bread and water.
Similarly, if I go to church to worship, do I go merely to receive, or do I go prepared to offer and participate? I want to be clear here that both are acceptable. There are times in our lives when we may be subject to weakness and lack strength. Those are the times that our offering is the size of a pair of doves. However, when we are strong and we wish to show our true devotion, we should be prepared to offer our very best. If we are able to give more, a large sheep or bull may not be sufficient. So it is worth asking, “What can I give, and what am I willing to give?”
Along with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, I can show Father that I will do whatever He requires if I am also willing to give my time, my talents, and my possessions to build up His kingdom. If I am willing to share these precious things with others, He will count it as though I had shared it with Him.
Perhaps it is not fair to suggest that all taking is bad, either. There is a difference in taking something that is offered as opposed to taking something that is not mine, or taking something prematurely because I am not patient. When a gift is offered, it is my responsibility to accept it, and take it, if I choose. Otherwise I can choose to decline. If I accept, then I should also take with a thankful heart.
Another instance of taking which is very appropriate is to receive instruction and follow. For instance, we have been commanded to take upon us the name of Christ, and not in vain. Taking the name of the Lord in vain is not just repeating His name without reverence. It also means that we accept Him, not just in word but in every action. If we profess to be disciples of Jesus but do not exemplify Him, are we not taking His name upon ourselves in vain? To truly take upon us His name means that we will make every effort to become like Him. Jesus becomes our spiritually begotten Father as we are born again and overcome the effects of spiritual death through His atonement. In this way, we take His image into our own countenances.
When we partake of the sacrament, we take the emblems of His body and blood into our own beings. If we are sincere in our repentance, we will take our covenants seriously when we renew them at the sacrament table. If we intend to remember Jesus and follow Him, then we will also be willing to take up our own cross and deny ourselves of all ungodliness. We will take His charge to bear one another’s burdens. So many of the things the Lord asks us to take involve taking more work and more responsibility for doing His will. Yet even in this effort of taking, we will find relief.
Jesus said, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
Repeatedly in the scriptures, the use of the words “give,” “offer,” “receive,” and “take” have consistent meanings. The Lord’s instruction to “take” is usually associated with selflessness and a willingness to do more, not less. He expects a true disciple to give up what is important so that the Lord can give us more. We offer our faith, and we receive greater blessings.
Because there is such great power in giving, rather than taking with selfish intent, it is worth asking ourselves the questions, “Do I give more than I take? When I take, do I replenish and give more back?” If we cannot answer yes, we may not be tapping into the power that is available for us to reach our full potential. The ability to give and give up also creates the opportunity to receive and offer more.
There are many things we can do that have the potential to draw us nearer to God, yet our attitude will largely determine how much. I may attend church, but do I merely go to listen and “take things into my daily life,” or do I go with the intent to give and offer something in return? If I fill a service assignment, do I accept because I know I will claim some blessing or reward, or do I do it out of love and appreciation? If I do something with the intent to take, I limit my ability to receive greater strength. But, if I perform the same action with the desire to give, my intent can transform the experience and yield much greater results.
The intent of the heart has more power than we may give it credit. The change in direction between giving and taking is 180 degrees. They are opposites. Whether we give or take a little may seem insignificant, but the direction of our motives sets the course for our final destination. A deliberate choice to follow the Savior by consistent giving is a sure path to find him. The difference between “give or take” is more than just a little. It all depends on intent.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Tanni, a close friend of mine for many years, is an amazing cook. She also has a passion for interior design, floral arrangements, and landscaping. Whatever she touches turns to gold, and she has a habit of touching quite a few things, and people. Occasionally she will fix up something delicious to share with fellow workers in the office just for their enjoyment, and hers. Tanni has the ability to put a smile on someone’s face in a snap, once the aroma wafts past their senses and the presentation of her gourmet treat pleases the eye. These sensations are just the appetizers for a taste that has yet to disappoint me. She has never fixed something that I haven’t loved.
I have noticed something interesting about Tanni’s creations. Everyone is willing to sample something delicious, but not everyone is willing to reciprocate. And, really, it’s hard, because few others cook like she does. I find myself wanting to do something to return the favor, however, and not just enjoy her cooking.
Another close friend, Kerstin, has taught me a lot about sharing things of value. She has a deep passion for music and the arts. Her singing voice is beautiful, emotive, and natural. Her music is full of expression and feeling. Consequently you sense more than her voice when she sings. While she is not self-promoting, I have always found Kerstin willing to share her talents if it will help someone else. She, too, has the ability to put a smile on someone’s face as their hearts are touched by the gift that she shares. Her music is valuable because it is heartfelt and selfless. In a performance setting, I have watched her figuratively step out of the spotlight and turn the focus from herself to what she hopes the audience will feel and experience. She prefers to share a wonderful performance without taking any credit.
Recently, while we were discussing things that we have shared, Kerstin said, “Why keep tally? I don’t have a ‘fair’ chart. It really doesn’t matter whose turn it is.” I appreciate her sentiment that sharing is about giving, and not just exchange. For me, giving without attached strings reflects purer motivations. It gets closer to the heart of charity.
My wife, Liz, is a wonderful example of giving. In the fifteen years of our marriage, I don’t know that I have ever seen her pick up a hobby that didn’t involve doing something for someone besides herself. She loves to scrapbook, but mostly because she treasures the memories of our family and the growth of our children. It is exciting to see the smiles on their faces as we look through old books and remember past experiences together. Liz loves to cross-stitch and sew for other people. Whether it is an article of clothing, a costume, a quilt, or some other home furnishing, she takes great satisfaction in giving her work away. Liz is also a wonderful cook. She has a very intuitive approach that is simple, practical, and delicious. I love to smell her freshly cooked bread come out of the oven ready to receive a butter glaze. My small twinge of reluctance when she wants to give her bread away is eased by a promise that she will make more. Thank goodness she keeps her word. Knowing that each of these things take time, and that Liz values time over most things, her gifts have great value to me.
With our children, I am trying to teach them to show their mother gratitude and appreciation by helping and not just taking. The bread is delicious, and it satisfies the senses, but there are still dishes to be done, and messes to be cleaned up. I think they are learning little by little.
Each of these examples has caused me to reflect on the difference between giving and taking. Anyone can take, but not everyone is willing to give. Yet, because there are those who do give so freely, many are better for it. There is more power in giving than in taking.
Giving adds tremendous strength to any relationship. When we consider friendships and family relationships that are meant to be eternal, we can strengthen those relationships by giving of ourselves and the things that we place high value on. This is especially applicable with our relationship with God.
If we wish to live with our Father in heaven again, that reward comes with a price. Fortunately, by the grace of God, the price for our sins has already been paid. Jesus paid that price with His own blood. All that is left for us to do is to accept His gift by offering the only thing we can offer in return, namely our discipleship and obedience.
Under the Law of Moses, ancient Israelites worshipped God by offering sacrifices. They offered their best. By giving up something of great value to themselves, they demonstrated their faith and love towards God. Those who did not have the means to give a large offering would bring what they could, which might be a couple of turtle-doves instead of a lamb. This law continued until the death of Jesus Christ, which ended sacrifices by the shedding of blood as a part of worship. These ordinances were replaced by the sacrament, which was to be done in remembrance of the Lord’s body and His blood which was shed for all mankind.
Just prior to His appearance to the people in the ancient Americas following His resurrection, Jesus revealed that burnt offerings were to be done away, and that, “ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit.” (3 Nephi 9:20) While the sacrifice would no longer be completely consumed, the offering was still intended to be complete.
If we combine these two principles – first, that the burnt offerings were to be replaced by the sacrament, and second, that by so doing we are to offer a broken heart and a contrite spirit – the act would suggest that when we prepare ourselves to partake of the sacrament we should be willing to make an offering and not just take the bread and water.
Similarly, if I go to church to worship, do I go merely to receive, or do I go prepared to offer and participate? I want to be clear here that both are acceptable. There are times in our lives when we may be subject to weakness and lack strength. Those are the times that our offering is the size of a pair of doves. However, when we are strong and we wish to show our true devotion, we should be prepared to offer our very best. If we are able to give more, a large sheep or bull may not be sufficient. So it is worth asking, “What can I give, and what am I willing to give?”
Along with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, I can show Father that I will do whatever He requires if I am also willing to give my time, my talents, and my possessions to build up His kingdom. If I am willing to share these precious things with others, He will count it as though I had shared it with Him.
Perhaps it is not fair to suggest that all taking is bad, either. There is a difference in taking something that is offered as opposed to taking something that is not mine, or taking something prematurely because I am not patient. When a gift is offered, it is my responsibility to accept it, and take it, if I choose. Otherwise I can choose to decline. If I accept, then I should also take with a thankful heart.
Another instance of taking which is very appropriate is to receive instruction and follow. For instance, we have been commanded to take upon us the name of Christ, and not in vain. Taking the name of the Lord in vain is not just repeating His name without reverence. It also means that we accept Him, not just in word but in every action. If we profess to be disciples of Jesus but do not exemplify Him, are we not taking His name upon ourselves in vain? To truly take upon us His name means that we will make every effort to become like Him. Jesus becomes our spiritually begotten Father as we are born again and overcome the effects of spiritual death through His atonement. In this way, we take His image into our own countenances.
When we partake of the sacrament, we take the emblems of His body and blood into our own beings. If we are sincere in our repentance, we will take our covenants seriously when we renew them at the sacrament table. If we intend to remember Jesus and follow Him, then we will also be willing to take up our own cross and deny ourselves of all ungodliness. We will take His charge to bear one another’s burdens. So many of the things the Lord asks us to take involve taking more work and more responsibility for doing His will. Yet even in this effort of taking, we will find relief.
Jesus said, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
Repeatedly in the scriptures, the use of the words “give,” “offer,” “receive,” and “take” have consistent meanings. The Lord’s instruction to “take” is usually associated with selflessness and a willingness to do more, not less. He expects a true disciple to give up what is important so that the Lord can give us more. We offer our faith, and we receive greater blessings.
Because there is such great power in giving, rather than taking with selfish intent, it is worth asking ourselves the questions, “Do I give more than I take? When I take, do I replenish and give more back?” If we cannot answer yes, we may not be tapping into the power that is available for us to reach our full potential. The ability to give and give up also creates the opportunity to receive and offer more.
There are many things we can do that have the potential to draw us nearer to God, yet our attitude will largely determine how much. I may attend church, but do I merely go to listen and “take things into my daily life,” or do I go with the intent to give and offer something in return? If I fill a service assignment, do I accept because I know I will claim some blessing or reward, or do I do it out of love and appreciation? If I do something with the intent to take, I limit my ability to receive greater strength. But, if I perform the same action with the desire to give, my intent can transform the experience and yield much greater results.
The intent of the heart has more power than we may give it credit. The change in direction between giving and taking is 180 degrees. They are opposites. Whether we give or take a little may seem insignificant, but the direction of our motives sets the course for our final destination. A deliberate choice to follow the Savior by consistent giving is a sure path to find him. The difference between “give or take” is more than just a little. It all depends on intent.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Monday, January 11, 2010
A Stranger in a Strange Land
To say I was uncomfortable would be too mildly put. On a number of occasions when I was a kid, my parents and I would go camping and we would stay at a campground that didn’t take reservations. Back then it was first come, first serve. In order to get a good campsite, you had to arrive early. My parents needed my help to find a good spot, and I found myself very afraid.
While driving through the campground, I remember my dad suggesting to me, “Johnny, why don’t you get out and hold this spot? We’ll keep looking, and if we find a better one, we’ll come back and get you.” As a boy I worried what would happen to me if they didn’t come back. Maybe they would leave me. I knew it wasn’t true, but the fear was real. Still, I would get out of the car and wait, and wait, and wait. I had plenty of time to wonder, “What if?”
Fortunately, my fears were never realized. Mom and Dad always came back for me. I don’t think I have any lasting scars from those occasions, but the memory is clear and the fear very tangible. I remember what it was like to be a stranger.
In the hymn, “O My Father,” Eliza R. Snow penned the words:
For a wise and glorious purpose
Thou hast placed me here on earth
And withheld the recollection
Of my former friends and birth;
Yet ofttimes a secret something
Whispered, “You’re a stranger here,”
And I felt that I had wandered
From a more exalted sphere.
(Hymns, 292)
Like my experience at the campground, we have each been placed on this earth by our Father in heaven. But this is not really our home. We are only strangers here. When I feel a longing for something more familiar, in both senses of the word, it is the closest I come to getting homesick.
The word “strange” sometimes has a negative connotation. If I were to say, “That person is strange,” it usually isn’t meant as a compliment. A person, a place or an experience that seems strange may refer to something this is different than we are used to. Trying to find comfort or security in that experience, we tend to label the circumstance rather than ourselves. It is a coping strategy to dissipate the awkwardness of the moment.
Many of the strange and different experiences we have on earth are actually lessons that we need in order to progress. Recognizing this can help us identify strategies that will help us learn quicker and adapt to unique circumstances. If we are looking in the right place, it will help us to increase our faith.
I believe we each go through experiences that, at some point, make us wonder, “How did I get here? What happened to my familiar surroundings? This is not what I had expected would happen.” Retrospective moments are usually easier than passing through those events. Therein lays the beauty of faith.
Similar to my fear about my parents’ instruction to wait for them, it is not uncommon for us to worry about whether or not Father will help us when we are in the middle of a test. If we make and keep covenants with Him, will He really help us? Will he come back for us and gather us? Sometimes we are afraid that he will leave us. Deep down inside we know it’s not true, but the fear is real.
I have spoken to friends before about living the law of tithing. I am convinced that tithing is a principle with promise, and that it has less to do with money and more to do with faith. Yet there are times when a friend was worried that if they paid their tithing they wouldn’t have enough to pay their mortgage or rent. “What if I get kicked out of my apartment? What if I lose my house?” Those who have lived this law and have gained a personal testimony know that God keeps His promises. “I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.” (D&C 82:10)
Perhaps there are some who choose not to serve a full-time mission because they are afraid they will miss out on opportunities that won’t wait for them. A young man may worry that a girlfriend or a scholarship won’t be there when he returns. A couple may worry that they will miss out on events like the baptism of a granddaughter. Yet the Lord is clear that He will bless those who honor and serve Him.
A member of a congregation may be asked by a member of the bishopric to accept an assignment or calling, but worry, “If I accept this assignment, I won’t have time to do the things that I want to do. I will have to give up too much.” This kind of fear does not produce faith. Instead it crowds it out of the heart.
If we are faithful in keeping our covenants, and are willing to give our time, our talents, and our means to building up the kingdom of God on earth, Father will come back to pick us up. He will gather His children and care for them as he has promised.
Recently, after a conversation with a friend, I considered the strength of my personal conviction to follow God. I thought on how secure my personal testimony was in aiding my obedience. In my reflection I identified three questions to consider. First, can God lie? The answer is a resounding no. He cannot lie or He would cease to be God. Second, can God speak to us? Yes, he can and does speak to us through His Holy Spirit. Lastly, will God lead us astray? The answer is no. He will not because everything he does is to help us to return to His presence. Knowing these things are true should prevent me from doubting Him in times of trial. Yet, these three truths are the often the first things we attack when it feels like God has left us alone.
We are creatures of fear with a destiny of faith. However, we can’t receive an inheritance from Father and be joint-heirs with Christ unless we are willing to overcome our fears and serve Him. It may help us to overcome our fears by looking to Abraham and the way he demonstrated his faith.
If you are one who has ever felt that you grew up in a less-than-stable home, where parents were dysfunctional or even less than supportive, or if you lived in a home where the gospel was not taught or practiced during critical growing up years, then you should not feel alone. Abraham, the patriarch, had a similar circumstance. Yet, in spite of a difficult life, Abraham rose above the trials and has entered into his exaltation. First, however, he was tested.
Abraham was living in the land of Ur of the Chaldeans when he found himself in a strange place. His fathers, having turned their hearts from God, endeavored to take away the life of Abraham by having him sacrificed on an altar to the Egyptian gods. As the priests of Elkenah were about lay their hands upon him to take his life, Abraham called upon God in prayer and was delivered from the priests. The Lord saved Abraham and said, “Abraham, Abraham, behold, my name is Jehovah, and I have heard thee, and have come down to deliver thee, and to take thee away from thy father’s house, and from all thy kinsfolk, into a strange land which thou knowest not of….” (Abraham 1:15-16)
The Lord told Abraham that He would take him to a strange land. Why? Because He knew that is what Abraham needed in order to prepare him for the blessings which the Lord would give him.
From the land of Ur (which is not far from modern-day Kuwait, approximately 100 miles up the Euphrates River from the Persian Gulf) the Lord led Abraham to a place called Haran (Closer to modern day Turkey, or west of Nineveh, the capitol of Assyria.) Depending on the source you look at, Abraham was in his 60’s or 70’s when this took place. The Lord would then lead him to the land of Canaan, to Egypt, and then to Canaan again. Abraham was not allowed to retire in a comfortable little cottage. At the age when people in our society consider such things, Abraham was definitely on the move.
Abraham also endured other difficult trials near the latter part of his life. A famine ensued in the land of Ur which caused Abraham’s brother to die. This was another reason for him to leave. Abraham experienced another famine in Canaan and survived. Because of his faith in the Lord, the Lord provided for him and saw him through.
Family matters continued to be a challenge for Abraham. While in Egypt, Pharaoh desired his wife and tried to take her. In the land of Canaan, Abraham had to separate from his nephew, Lot, because of a disagreement over their possessions. Abraham later had to fight in battle to rescue Lot. There was disappointment when Sarah could not bear him the son he desired so much. This lead to him taking Hagar to wife and their subsequent separation because of Sarah.
Through all of the trials that Abraham endured, he did not complain. The Lord had promised him a posterity as numerous as the sands of the sea or the stars in the heaven. Yet, for most of his life, Abraham had no children. Notwithstanding this disappointment, “he believed in the Lord; and [the Lord] counted it to him for righteousness.” (Genesis 15:6) He did not doubt that the Lord would keep his promises.
Abraham was 84 years old when Hagar finally gave him a son. However, Ishmael was not the one with whom the Lord would establish his covenant. For that, Abraham would have to wait again. It was at the age of 100, when Sarah was 90, that Abraham received the blessing he sought his entire life. Sarah bore him Isaac.
Some years later Abraham was tested beyond anything he had experienced in his life up to that point. The Lord spoke to him and asked him to give up the thing he had waited for his entire life. He was asked to offer up his son Isaac as a burnt offering. How much time transpired until Abraham climbed the Mount in Moriah with Isaac I don’t know; but Isaac was old enough to understand the law of sacrifice and recognize that there was no lamb with them for a burnt offering.
As Abraham bound his son and laid him on the altar, I can only imagine that he may have had flashbacks to the time when he himself laid upon an altar in the land of Ur. Perhaps he wondered why the Lord would ask such a thing when He had prevented Abraham from being offered up as a sacrifice in a similar manner. I would wonder, “If it was wrong then, why is it not wrong now?” What a strange circumstance to find yourself in. Abraham did not question, however. He merely obeyed. It wasn’t until he had stretched forth his hand to take the knife to slay his son that the Lord stopped him. It was enough. The Lord said to Abraham, “Lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou any thing unto him: for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thing only son from me.” (Genesis 22:12) The Lord then provided a ram which Abraham offered instead.
Abraham was frequently a stranger in a strange land. He found himself in strange and unique circumstances, places that most of us would find very uncomfortable. Were it not for his unyielding faith in God, and were it not for his unfailing obedience, Abraham would not have been able to receive the promised blessings the Lord had offered to him. He would not have been prepared for his exaltation.
Because the Abrahamic covenant was extended by the Lord to Abraham’s posterity, based on their worthiness, it is important to look at the conditions for receiving the promised blessings. After the Lord told Abraham that his posterity would be numerous, He also said, “Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land that is not theirs, and shall serve them….” (Genesis 15:13)
While this scripture refers to the captivity of the House of Israel in Egypt, there is a definite message in it for those who seek the same blessings of salvation. How can we expect the same blessings as Abraham without being tested in a similar manner?
Speaking of those who believed at the time of the restoration of the gospel, the Lord told Joseph Smith, “I, the Lord, have suffered the affliction to come upon them, wherewith they have been afflicted, in consequence of their transgressions; Yet I will own them, and they shall be mine in that day when I shall come to make up my jewels. Therefore, they must needs be chastened and tried, even as Abraham, who was commanded to offer up his only son. For all those who will not endure chastening, but deny me, cannot be sanctified.” (D&C 101:2-5) The Lord confirms that this type of testing, regardless of its form, is necessary to refine His children so that they can be sanctified and worthy of exaltation.
Perhaps, then, the strangeness of this process is that it is less important to the Lord that a sacrifice is actually made, and more important that the giver is willing at any moment to show the Lord that He is preeminent in all things. Thus were the sacrifices of Abraham counted unto him for righteousness, because he was prepared and ready to make the offering.
The beauty of this story is that God keeps His promises. He has promised to gather His children. He will, and He is. Regardless of how strange and difficult the circumstances are, The Lord will always come back and help us if we are faithful and wait upon Him. He will pick us up.
Because our fears are so tangible and real at times – fear of things that we may or may not be able to see but are not true – we must be diligent in protecting our hearts from this sabotage of faith. Fear and faith cannot exist in the same mind at the same time. Fear robs faith, and if we let it continue, fear will rob us of obedience, sanctification, and exaltation. It will keep us from being joint-heirs with Christ.
It is important to note that our faith, while placed in things that we cannot see or feel at times, is just as real as our fears, and more so. It can be just as tangible. Interestingly enough, though, the reasons to have faith are more founded than the reasons for our fears. If we believe in God, and we believe that He cannot lie, He will speak to us, and He will not lead us astray, then we have to believe that with God all things are possible. We have to believe that he will keep His promises.
If we are faithful in keeping our covenants, and are willing to give our time, our talents, and our means to building up the kingdom of God on earth, Father will come back to gather us. He will help us. If we are willing to sacrifice, He will prove that He will not forget us. As we look to the Lord in difficult times we will realize that we truly are strangers in a strange land. We are also a peculiar people whom the Lord has promised to assist. When we are faithful and not fearful, miracles happen. Father will always come back to pick us up.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
While driving through the campground, I remember my dad suggesting to me, “Johnny, why don’t you get out and hold this spot? We’ll keep looking, and if we find a better one, we’ll come back and get you.” As a boy I worried what would happen to me if they didn’t come back. Maybe they would leave me. I knew it wasn’t true, but the fear was real. Still, I would get out of the car and wait, and wait, and wait. I had plenty of time to wonder, “What if?”
Fortunately, my fears were never realized. Mom and Dad always came back for me. I don’t think I have any lasting scars from those occasions, but the memory is clear and the fear very tangible. I remember what it was like to be a stranger.
In the hymn, “O My Father,” Eliza R. Snow penned the words:
For a wise and glorious purpose
Thou hast placed me here on earth
And withheld the recollection
Of my former friends and birth;
Yet ofttimes a secret something
Whispered, “You’re a stranger here,”
And I felt that I had wandered
From a more exalted sphere.
(Hymns, 292)
Like my experience at the campground, we have each been placed on this earth by our Father in heaven. But this is not really our home. We are only strangers here. When I feel a longing for something more familiar, in both senses of the word, it is the closest I come to getting homesick.
The word “strange” sometimes has a negative connotation. If I were to say, “That person is strange,” it usually isn’t meant as a compliment. A person, a place or an experience that seems strange may refer to something this is different than we are used to. Trying to find comfort or security in that experience, we tend to label the circumstance rather than ourselves. It is a coping strategy to dissipate the awkwardness of the moment.
Many of the strange and different experiences we have on earth are actually lessons that we need in order to progress. Recognizing this can help us identify strategies that will help us learn quicker and adapt to unique circumstances. If we are looking in the right place, it will help us to increase our faith.
I believe we each go through experiences that, at some point, make us wonder, “How did I get here? What happened to my familiar surroundings? This is not what I had expected would happen.” Retrospective moments are usually easier than passing through those events. Therein lays the beauty of faith.
Similar to my fear about my parents’ instruction to wait for them, it is not uncommon for us to worry about whether or not Father will help us when we are in the middle of a test. If we make and keep covenants with Him, will He really help us? Will he come back for us and gather us? Sometimes we are afraid that he will leave us. Deep down inside we know it’s not true, but the fear is real.
I have spoken to friends before about living the law of tithing. I am convinced that tithing is a principle with promise, and that it has less to do with money and more to do with faith. Yet there are times when a friend was worried that if they paid their tithing they wouldn’t have enough to pay their mortgage or rent. “What if I get kicked out of my apartment? What if I lose my house?” Those who have lived this law and have gained a personal testimony know that God keeps His promises. “I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.” (D&C 82:10)
Perhaps there are some who choose not to serve a full-time mission because they are afraid they will miss out on opportunities that won’t wait for them. A young man may worry that a girlfriend or a scholarship won’t be there when he returns. A couple may worry that they will miss out on events like the baptism of a granddaughter. Yet the Lord is clear that He will bless those who honor and serve Him.
A member of a congregation may be asked by a member of the bishopric to accept an assignment or calling, but worry, “If I accept this assignment, I won’t have time to do the things that I want to do. I will have to give up too much.” This kind of fear does not produce faith. Instead it crowds it out of the heart.
If we are faithful in keeping our covenants, and are willing to give our time, our talents, and our means to building up the kingdom of God on earth, Father will come back to pick us up. He will gather His children and care for them as he has promised.
Recently, after a conversation with a friend, I considered the strength of my personal conviction to follow God. I thought on how secure my personal testimony was in aiding my obedience. In my reflection I identified three questions to consider. First, can God lie? The answer is a resounding no. He cannot lie or He would cease to be God. Second, can God speak to us? Yes, he can and does speak to us through His Holy Spirit. Lastly, will God lead us astray? The answer is no. He will not because everything he does is to help us to return to His presence. Knowing these things are true should prevent me from doubting Him in times of trial. Yet, these three truths are the often the first things we attack when it feels like God has left us alone.
We are creatures of fear with a destiny of faith. However, we can’t receive an inheritance from Father and be joint-heirs with Christ unless we are willing to overcome our fears and serve Him. It may help us to overcome our fears by looking to Abraham and the way he demonstrated his faith.
If you are one who has ever felt that you grew up in a less-than-stable home, where parents were dysfunctional or even less than supportive, or if you lived in a home where the gospel was not taught or practiced during critical growing up years, then you should not feel alone. Abraham, the patriarch, had a similar circumstance. Yet, in spite of a difficult life, Abraham rose above the trials and has entered into his exaltation. First, however, he was tested.
Abraham was living in the land of Ur of the Chaldeans when he found himself in a strange place. His fathers, having turned their hearts from God, endeavored to take away the life of Abraham by having him sacrificed on an altar to the Egyptian gods. As the priests of Elkenah were about lay their hands upon him to take his life, Abraham called upon God in prayer and was delivered from the priests. The Lord saved Abraham and said, “Abraham, Abraham, behold, my name is Jehovah, and I have heard thee, and have come down to deliver thee, and to take thee away from thy father’s house, and from all thy kinsfolk, into a strange land which thou knowest not of….” (Abraham 1:15-16)
The Lord told Abraham that He would take him to a strange land. Why? Because He knew that is what Abraham needed in order to prepare him for the blessings which the Lord would give him.
From the land of Ur (which is not far from modern-day Kuwait, approximately 100 miles up the Euphrates River from the Persian Gulf) the Lord led Abraham to a place called Haran (Closer to modern day Turkey, or west of Nineveh, the capitol of Assyria.) Depending on the source you look at, Abraham was in his 60’s or 70’s when this took place. The Lord would then lead him to the land of Canaan, to Egypt, and then to Canaan again. Abraham was not allowed to retire in a comfortable little cottage. At the age when people in our society consider such things, Abraham was definitely on the move.
Abraham also endured other difficult trials near the latter part of his life. A famine ensued in the land of Ur which caused Abraham’s brother to die. This was another reason for him to leave. Abraham experienced another famine in Canaan and survived. Because of his faith in the Lord, the Lord provided for him and saw him through.
Family matters continued to be a challenge for Abraham. While in Egypt, Pharaoh desired his wife and tried to take her. In the land of Canaan, Abraham had to separate from his nephew, Lot, because of a disagreement over their possessions. Abraham later had to fight in battle to rescue Lot. There was disappointment when Sarah could not bear him the son he desired so much. This lead to him taking Hagar to wife and their subsequent separation because of Sarah.
Through all of the trials that Abraham endured, he did not complain. The Lord had promised him a posterity as numerous as the sands of the sea or the stars in the heaven. Yet, for most of his life, Abraham had no children. Notwithstanding this disappointment, “he believed in the Lord; and [the Lord] counted it to him for righteousness.” (Genesis 15:6) He did not doubt that the Lord would keep his promises.
Abraham was 84 years old when Hagar finally gave him a son. However, Ishmael was not the one with whom the Lord would establish his covenant. For that, Abraham would have to wait again. It was at the age of 100, when Sarah was 90, that Abraham received the blessing he sought his entire life. Sarah bore him Isaac.
Some years later Abraham was tested beyond anything he had experienced in his life up to that point. The Lord spoke to him and asked him to give up the thing he had waited for his entire life. He was asked to offer up his son Isaac as a burnt offering. How much time transpired until Abraham climbed the Mount in Moriah with Isaac I don’t know; but Isaac was old enough to understand the law of sacrifice and recognize that there was no lamb with them for a burnt offering.
As Abraham bound his son and laid him on the altar, I can only imagine that he may have had flashbacks to the time when he himself laid upon an altar in the land of Ur. Perhaps he wondered why the Lord would ask such a thing when He had prevented Abraham from being offered up as a sacrifice in a similar manner. I would wonder, “If it was wrong then, why is it not wrong now?” What a strange circumstance to find yourself in. Abraham did not question, however. He merely obeyed. It wasn’t until he had stretched forth his hand to take the knife to slay his son that the Lord stopped him. It was enough. The Lord said to Abraham, “Lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou any thing unto him: for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thing only son from me.” (Genesis 22:12) The Lord then provided a ram which Abraham offered instead.
Abraham was frequently a stranger in a strange land. He found himself in strange and unique circumstances, places that most of us would find very uncomfortable. Were it not for his unyielding faith in God, and were it not for his unfailing obedience, Abraham would not have been able to receive the promised blessings the Lord had offered to him. He would not have been prepared for his exaltation.
Because the Abrahamic covenant was extended by the Lord to Abraham’s posterity, based on their worthiness, it is important to look at the conditions for receiving the promised blessings. After the Lord told Abraham that his posterity would be numerous, He also said, “Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land that is not theirs, and shall serve them….” (Genesis 15:13)
While this scripture refers to the captivity of the House of Israel in Egypt, there is a definite message in it for those who seek the same blessings of salvation. How can we expect the same blessings as Abraham without being tested in a similar manner?
Speaking of those who believed at the time of the restoration of the gospel, the Lord told Joseph Smith, “I, the Lord, have suffered the affliction to come upon them, wherewith they have been afflicted, in consequence of their transgressions; Yet I will own them, and they shall be mine in that day when I shall come to make up my jewels. Therefore, they must needs be chastened and tried, even as Abraham, who was commanded to offer up his only son. For all those who will not endure chastening, but deny me, cannot be sanctified.” (D&C 101:2-5) The Lord confirms that this type of testing, regardless of its form, is necessary to refine His children so that they can be sanctified and worthy of exaltation.
Perhaps, then, the strangeness of this process is that it is less important to the Lord that a sacrifice is actually made, and more important that the giver is willing at any moment to show the Lord that He is preeminent in all things. Thus were the sacrifices of Abraham counted unto him for righteousness, because he was prepared and ready to make the offering.
The beauty of this story is that God keeps His promises. He has promised to gather His children. He will, and He is. Regardless of how strange and difficult the circumstances are, The Lord will always come back and help us if we are faithful and wait upon Him. He will pick us up.
Because our fears are so tangible and real at times – fear of things that we may or may not be able to see but are not true – we must be diligent in protecting our hearts from this sabotage of faith. Fear and faith cannot exist in the same mind at the same time. Fear robs faith, and if we let it continue, fear will rob us of obedience, sanctification, and exaltation. It will keep us from being joint-heirs with Christ.
It is important to note that our faith, while placed in things that we cannot see or feel at times, is just as real as our fears, and more so. It can be just as tangible. Interestingly enough, though, the reasons to have faith are more founded than the reasons for our fears. If we believe in God, and we believe that He cannot lie, He will speak to us, and He will not lead us astray, then we have to believe that with God all things are possible. We have to believe that he will keep His promises.
If we are faithful in keeping our covenants, and are willing to give our time, our talents, and our means to building up the kingdom of God on earth, Father will come back to gather us. He will help us. If we are willing to sacrifice, He will prove that He will not forget us. As we look to the Lord in difficult times we will realize that we truly are strangers in a strange land. We are also a peculiar people whom the Lord has promised to assist. When we are faithful and not fearful, miracles happen. Father will always come back to pick us up.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Passing Opportunities
In keeping with my focus last week, I made a new friend this morning. What a great way to start the year! It was a remarkable encounter. At my request, this new friend gave some advice to me, as well as his gratitude for my wife whom he has never met. He passed on some of his experience and I was uplifted. He offered to help me with anything, and I believe him.
Yesterday, I received word that a friend of mine had just passed away after struggling with cancer. Gratefully, my memory of him has not yet passed. It warms my heart to have known him, to see his strength, and to have shared common experiences. I am grateful for the time I could be in his home.
Another friend recently went through the process of taking and passing the examinations to become a licensed architect. I was happy to congratulate him on his successful accomplishment. I knew what that was like, to prepare and to achieve. What a great feeling to pass!
Thinking about each of my friends this morning prompted me to consider a tangential thought that has been on my mind of late. Passing. I have found that the word pass is used in many varied contexts. In fact, a quick internet search led me to identify over eighty-five different uses for the word “pass.”
Passing is often an action that I may do or allow. To pass can mean to go by, across, over, or beyond. It may also mean to let go, or allow something to go, such as passing on or declining an invitation.
I think it is ironic that one word can have two related meanings and yet be opposites. If I pass on some sort of information to another person, my actions suggest that I approve enough to give it to them. But, if I pass on an opportunity, this usually means that I don’t approve enough to accept. It is this duality that makes me curious – to “pass something on” or to “pass” on something is a choice between allowing and declining.
Looking at the children my wife and I have, there is tangible evidence that we have passed on more than good looks (and I’ll let you be the judge of whether or not we have done that.) Our kids have picked up our habits, interests, humor, sarcasm, likes, and dislikes. Perhaps they haven’t picked up all of them, but they have caught enough to know that there is more to passing than genetics. This leads to another definition of the word.
Pass can also mean circulate, disseminate, spread, convey, transfer, or transmit. Intentional or not, this meaning has a lot to do with what we communicate to others, or what we think valuable enough to share. I recalled another childhood memory the other day that seemed to fit this meaning so well that I hope you can relate. It is all about the Parker Brothers’ game of Pit.
One Christmas when I was small, I remember receiving a magnificent gift. My grandparents had given me a toy helicopter with multiple spinning propellers. It was a wonderful present in my eyes, but it hasn’t lasted as long as the memory of what happened next. After we finished unwrapping presents at their home, Grandma had pumpkin pie waiting in the adjacent room. We ate and then proceeded to play a game of Pit that was totally unfamiliar to me. If you haven’t played, let me sum up.
Pit is a card game of exchange. A deck of cards marked with different grains (flax, hay, oats, rye, corn, barley, and wheat) are dealt to those playing the game. Each player attempts to trade their cards to acquire a hand of a single commodity. In this game, there are no turns. Once the game begins, players begin making offers with anyone who will trade cards with them; three oats for three barley, or two flax for two wheat. The person making an offer has to find “value cards” that are of some worth to another player, or they will find themselves short of making any deals. The first player to acquire all nine cards of one grain rings a bell ending the round.
In addition to these commodities, there are two other cards that are shuffled into the deck and dealt as part of the game. One is a bear, and the other is a bull. The bull is a wild card. If a person has the bull when they acquire all nine cards of one grain, they double their points for that round. However, one left with the bull who is not successful at obtaining a full hand loses points. Similarly, anyone left with the bear cannot win the game, and they also lose points. While the bull may be of value, the bear never is. When a player trades the bear or the bull to someone else without their knowing, this is referred to as “slipping the bear” or “slipping the bull.”
Now that I have told you how to play the game, you can forget most of it. What I hope you will remember is that the players are about to exchange cards with other players. Everyone is looking for something, particularly cards that are of value to them. Everyone is looking for someone who will trade those cards with them. It feels good when you make a good trade, but not so good if someone slips you the bear. The former makes a good friend, while the latter is less so.
I didn’t really see the point when I first played the game. In fact, I was probably a sore loser because someone slipped me the bear and I didn’t know what to do with it. To be honest, I can’t remember. Since then, the point of the game has increased in value to me as I think about the opportunity of sharing things of value with others.
Consider two people who engage in a conversation. Both hope to gain something by sharing. The conversation may not last very long unless both people feel rewarded, that is, if they both feel they gain something of value for sharing. The difference between the game of Pit and the game of conversation is that I don’t feel like I have to acquire a full hand of the same card in order to talk to someone. Instead, I am merely looking for valuable cards. In fact, I am often willing to trade five of my valuable cards for a single card that is of value to a friend. The card they have to offer may not even be a card I have seen before, but knowing the card is of value to them makes a lot of difference to me. I prize it more because they were sharing something that meant a lot to them. The more important the card is to the person I am talking with, the deeper I value the conversation. I don’t mind offering more as long as I know the cards I offer will be well received.
Occasionally you may meet someone who wishes to talk to you who intends to slip you the bear. They may not be interested in sharing something of value. Instead, they may only be looking for someone who will listen to their complaints. I don’t mind hearing about someone’s complaints if they are looking for help, especially if I can do something about it. However, when someone shares something just so they can get it off of their back and onto mine, I feel like I have been “slipped a bear.” This is a frustrating moment when the bell rings, the conversation is over, and you are left holding a yucky card. I have decided that I don’t like playing that sort of game.
Since the game of life has different rules for winning than the game of Pit, namely the golden rule – do unto others as you would have them do unto you – I have made a personal decision to only play cards I think will have value to someone else. I look for ways to increase the value of the conversation. I hope I can offer more than I expect in return because I know that what goes around comes around. Besides, the Savior taught, “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” (Matthew 25:40) I try to be careful not to slip someone else the bear.
It seems funny to me that in some settings common sense is more common than others. For instance, most people with any consideration will use caution if they have a contagious illness. Someone with a common cold will refrain from shaking hands or touching someone else if they are carrying germs. They are careful not to pass on something that may harm a friend or a stranger. There are times, I believe most often unintentionally, that we are less cautious with information that may be compared to a common cold.
The headlines of newspapers are full of sensational information. The story may be unique, or it may even be strange or unusual, but this does not always equate to valuable in my book. News does not always mean valuable. New only suggests current. It is not uncommon to pass on information that we refer to as current events without consideration to whether or not it will be of value to the person we are sharing it with.
This idea of news may also be applied to gossip, rumors, or even things that may be true but will have no positive effect on others. Just because something happened doesn’t mean it was entirely helpful. Sadly, though, we are more careful about passing a newly acquired illness, such as a cough or a cold. In fact, it is not uncommon to wash one’s hands clean of the germs to make sure that contamination is not spread. For times such as these, it may be prudent to have your own little container of hand sanitizer to help wash your hands of contaminated information, no matter how true it is.
The Lord gave Joseph Smith instruction on how to share with others most effectively. His way always includes an invitation for the Holy Ghost. While His pattern was specific to sharing His message of the gospel of Jesus Christ, there is some application in every conversation of His disciples. The Lord said, “Wherefore, I the Lord ask you this question—unto what were ye ordained? To preach my gospel by the Spirit, even the Comforter which was sent forth to teach the truth.” (D&C 50:13-14)
There are some truths that merit the witness of the Holy Ghost. Truths about God, His plan for His children, the divine role of the Savior Jesus Christ and His atonement, or truths that are taught by His servants all invite the divine witness of the Holy Ghost. While there are other facts that are true, such as the color of the sky or the injustice committed by a stranger, these truths may not merit a divine witness. Here then is another meaning of value.
The Lord continues, “Therefore, why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth? Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together.” (D&C 50:21-22)
Valuable information should uplift and edify both the one offering the information and the one receiving it. The beauty of sharing cards of greater value, especially spiritual value, is that there is a greater likelihood that we will invite the Holy Spirit into our lives. When we do, our lives become better.
Jesus continues with a warning and a charge, “And that which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness. That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.” (D&C 50:23-24)
As we learn to play this game the way Father intended us to play, we will find that our cards are replenished. As we offer cards of value to others, we will not run out. On the contrary, the cards we have to offer are increased. As we focus on Him, our cards become more valuable and more desirable. Jesus refers to this value as light, or His light, the light of Christ. We gain more light as we seek it and as we share it. The light of the Son is always available unless we shut our eyes to it. But we can only focus on one thing at a time. We can focus on the strange and unique, or we can look to God and live.
A true disciple will be careful of what he or she receives. This same disciple will then be careful what he or she imparts to others, to make sure that a brother, a sister, a friend, or a stranger has every opportunity to win the game. It’s a nice game when everyone can win without having to have a loser. This doesn’t mean that all players settle for sameness. Each can have a perfect brightness of hope with every opportunity for a brighter day.
Passing through life comes with the opportunity to pass on what makes us happy. A passage often refers to a way or connection from somewhere or something. What will you allow yourself to be connected to? To whom will you trade things of greater value? What kind of game are you interested in playing? It is a choice of allowing things of value and declining those that aren’t. The question, “What will you pass on?” can have two meanings. Personally, I prefer passing opportunities to others rather than slipping the bear. I would rather accept the opportunity to do good rather than pass. A game with “high value cards” is my kind of game. It results in relationships that are deeper and more meaningful.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Yesterday, I received word that a friend of mine had just passed away after struggling with cancer. Gratefully, my memory of him has not yet passed. It warms my heart to have known him, to see his strength, and to have shared common experiences. I am grateful for the time I could be in his home.
Another friend recently went through the process of taking and passing the examinations to become a licensed architect. I was happy to congratulate him on his successful accomplishment. I knew what that was like, to prepare and to achieve. What a great feeling to pass!
Thinking about each of my friends this morning prompted me to consider a tangential thought that has been on my mind of late. Passing. I have found that the word pass is used in many varied contexts. In fact, a quick internet search led me to identify over eighty-five different uses for the word “pass.”
Passing is often an action that I may do or allow. To pass can mean to go by, across, over, or beyond. It may also mean to let go, or allow something to go, such as passing on or declining an invitation.
I think it is ironic that one word can have two related meanings and yet be opposites. If I pass on some sort of information to another person, my actions suggest that I approve enough to give it to them. But, if I pass on an opportunity, this usually means that I don’t approve enough to accept. It is this duality that makes me curious – to “pass something on” or to “pass” on something is a choice between allowing and declining.
Looking at the children my wife and I have, there is tangible evidence that we have passed on more than good looks (and I’ll let you be the judge of whether or not we have done that.) Our kids have picked up our habits, interests, humor, sarcasm, likes, and dislikes. Perhaps they haven’t picked up all of them, but they have caught enough to know that there is more to passing than genetics. This leads to another definition of the word.
Pass can also mean circulate, disseminate, spread, convey, transfer, or transmit. Intentional or not, this meaning has a lot to do with what we communicate to others, or what we think valuable enough to share. I recalled another childhood memory the other day that seemed to fit this meaning so well that I hope you can relate. It is all about the Parker Brothers’ game of Pit.
One Christmas when I was small, I remember receiving a magnificent gift. My grandparents had given me a toy helicopter with multiple spinning propellers. It was a wonderful present in my eyes, but it hasn’t lasted as long as the memory of what happened next. After we finished unwrapping presents at their home, Grandma had pumpkin pie waiting in the adjacent room. We ate and then proceeded to play a game of Pit that was totally unfamiliar to me. If you haven’t played, let me sum up.
Pit is a card game of exchange. A deck of cards marked with different grains (flax, hay, oats, rye, corn, barley, and wheat) are dealt to those playing the game. Each player attempts to trade their cards to acquire a hand of a single commodity. In this game, there are no turns. Once the game begins, players begin making offers with anyone who will trade cards with them; three oats for three barley, or two flax for two wheat. The person making an offer has to find “value cards” that are of some worth to another player, or they will find themselves short of making any deals. The first player to acquire all nine cards of one grain rings a bell ending the round.
In addition to these commodities, there are two other cards that are shuffled into the deck and dealt as part of the game. One is a bear, and the other is a bull. The bull is a wild card. If a person has the bull when they acquire all nine cards of one grain, they double their points for that round. However, one left with the bull who is not successful at obtaining a full hand loses points. Similarly, anyone left with the bear cannot win the game, and they also lose points. While the bull may be of value, the bear never is. When a player trades the bear or the bull to someone else without their knowing, this is referred to as “slipping the bear” or “slipping the bull.”
Now that I have told you how to play the game, you can forget most of it. What I hope you will remember is that the players are about to exchange cards with other players. Everyone is looking for something, particularly cards that are of value to them. Everyone is looking for someone who will trade those cards with them. It feels good when you make a good trade, but not so good if someone slips you the bear. The former makes a good friend, while the latter is less so.
I didn’t really see the point when I first played the game. In fact, I was probably a sore loser because someone slipped me the bear and I didn’t know what to do with it. To be honest, I can’t remember. Since then, the point of the game has increased in value to me as I think about the opportunity of sharing things of value with others.
Consider two people who engage in a conversation. Both hope to gain something by sharing. The conversation may not last very long unless both people feel rewarded, that is, if they both feel they gain something of value for sharing. The difference between the game of Pit and the game of conversation is that I don’t feel like I have to acquire a full hand of the same card in order to talk to someone. Instead, I am merely looking for valuable cards. In fact, I am often willing to trade five of my valuable cards for a single card that is of value to a friend. The card they have to offer may not even be a card I have seen before, but knowing the card is of value to them makes a lot of difference to me. I prize it more because they were sharing something that meant a lot to them. The more important the card is to the person I am talking with, the deeper I value the conversation. I don’t mind offering more as long as I know the cards I offer will be well received.
Occasionally you may meet someone who wishes to talk to you who intends to slip you the bear. They may not be interested in sharing something of value. Instead, they may only be looking for someone who will listen to their complaints. I don’t mind hearing about someone’s complaints if they are looking for help, especially if I can do something about it. However, when someone shares something just so they can get it off of their back and onto mine, I feel like I have been “slipped a bear.” This is a frustrating moment when the bell rings, the conversation is over, and you are left holding a yucky card. I have decided that I don’t like playing that sort of game.
Since the game of life has different rules for winning than the game of Pit, namely the golden rule – do unto others as you would have them do unto you – I have made a personal decision to only play cards I think will have value to someone else. I look for ways to increase the value of the conversation. I hope I can offer more than I expect in return because I know that what goes around comes around. Besides, the Savior taught, “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” (Matthew 25:40) I try to be careful not to slip someone else the bear.
It seems funny to me that in some settings common sense is more common than others. For instance, most people with any consideration will use caution if they have a contagious illness. Someone with a common cold will refrain from shaking hands or touching someone else if they are carrying germs. They are careful not to pass on something that may harm a friend or a stranger. There are times, I believe most often unintentionally, that we are less cautious with information that may be compared to a common cold.
The headlines of newspapers are full of sensational information. The story may be unique, or it may even be strange or unusual, but this does not always equate to valuable in my book. News does not always mean valuable. New only suggests current. It is not uncommon to pass on information that we refer to as current events without consideration to whether or not it will be of value to the person we are sharing it with.
This idea of news may also be applied to gossip, rumors, or even things that may be true but will have no positive effect on others. Just because something happened doesn’t mean it was entirely helpful. Sadly, though, we are more careful about passing a newly acquired illness, such as a cough or a cold. In fact, it is not uncommon to wash one’s hands clean of the germs to make sure that contamination is not spread. For times such as these, it may be prudent to have your own little container of hand sanitizer to help wash your hands of contaminated information, no matter how true it is.
The Lord gave Joseph Smith instruction on how to share with others most effectively. His way always includes an invitation for the Holy Ghost. While His pattern was specific to sharing His message of the gospel of Jesus Christ, there is some application in every conversation of His disciples. The Lord said, “Wherefore, I the Lord ask you this question—unto what were ye ordained? To preach my gospel by the Spirit, even the Comforter which was sent forth to teach the truth.” (D&C 50:13-14)
There are some truths that merit the witness of the Holy Ghost. Truths about God, His plan for His children, the divine role of the Savior Jesus Christ and His atonement, or truths that are taught by His servants all invite the divine witness of the Holy Ghost. While there are other facts that are true, such as the color of the sky or the injustice committed by a stranger, these truths may not merit a divine witness. Here then is another meaning of value.
The Lord continues, “Therefore, why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth? Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together.” (D&C 50:21-22)
Valuable information should uplift and edify both the one offering the information and the one receiving it. The beauty of sharing cards of greater value, especially spiritual value, is that there is a greater likelihood that we will invite the Holy Spirit into our lives. When we do, our lives become better.
Jesus continues with a warning and a charge, “And that which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness. That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.” (D&C 50:23-24)
As we learn to play this game the way Father intended us to play, we will find that our cards are replenished. As we offer cards of value to others, we will not run out. On the contrary, the cards we have to offer are increased. As we focus on Him, our cards become more valuable and more desirable. Jesus refers to this value as light, or His light, the light of Christ. We gain more light as we seek it and as we share it. The light of the Son is always available unless we shut our eyes to it. But we can only focus on one thing at a time. We can focus on the strange and unique, or we can look to God and live.
A true disciple will be careful of what he or she receives. This same disciple will then be careful what he or she imparts to others, to make sure that a brother, a sister, a friend, or a stranger has every opportunity to win the game. It’s a nice game when everyone can win without having to have a loser. This doesn’t mean that all players settle for sameness. Each can have a perfect brightness of hope with every opportunity for a brighter day.
Passing through life comes with the opportunity to pass on what makes us happy. A passage often refers to a way or connection from somewhere or something. What will you allow yourself to be connected to? To whom will you trade things of greater value? What kind of game are you interested in playing? It is a choice of allowing things of value and declining those that aren’t. The question, “What will you pass on?” can have two meanings. Personally, I prefer passing opportunities to others rather than slipping the bear. I would rather accept the opportunity to do good rather than pass. A game with “high value cards” is my kind of game. It results in relationships that are deeper and more meaningful.
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