Looking back at the milestones that mark the past several months, I can say without hesitation that this year has been unparalleled by any other year in my life. 2009 has been the year of amazing friendships. Uniquely, so many started because of the Savior, Jesus Christ. Even He seems much closer than ever before. This is a year that I will always cherish and never forget. Perhaps that is because these friendships have come after a lifetime of seeking.
Growing up, I always wanted a best friend. Everyone else seemed to have one. My circumstances seemed a little different than most because the friends I saw at school during the week were different than those I played with in the neighborhood. And those friends were different than the ones I saw at church on Sunday. That had a lot to do with living at the edge of an elementary school boundary and living at the edge of a congregational ward boundary with a little sliver of cross-over territory shared between the two. It was sort of a no-man’s land. The girl next door was a great friend for a lot of years until it was cooler for girls to play with girls and boys with boys. Still, she is a friend of mine to this day. We had everything in common way back when.
The need for friends didn’t change as I got older, but only increased. There is such a power in finding someone else who thinks like you do, who feels like you do, and who shares the same things in common. I think we all want to trust and be trusted, to love and feel love in return. That need is a powerful motivator. It is also not without a counterpoint growing up.
Becoming a teenager is really an awkward thing to do. It feels strange and it is strange. I know very few people who didn’t feel that way at some point. At that age, most teenagers lack confidence and connection. Almost overnight a change occurs where the need for friends becomes stronger than the need for family. As uncomfortable as that age may feel, I think this desire is really a divine gift Father gives to His children to prompt them out of the comfortable nest of security and into adulthood. It motivates each of us to grow up a little.
Now that I have a couple of sons approaching that age, it is fun looking at the world through their eyes. I am glad they trust me enough to talk about their friends, their interests, and their attractions, namely girls. For all its ups and downs, that period of life results in tremendous growth. What I don’t think most teenagers realize (while they may know everything else) is that for the first time in their life, they are capable of that rapid growth. It is not by accident, but by design.
I realized a defining moment when I found that I was tired of being unpopular and I could do something about it. At that age I always felt that no one wanted to do things with me because they never asked. So I would stay home and feel sorry for myself. That all changed one day with an idea. “Maybe there are other people who are waiting for someone to extend an invitation like I am. Maybe they really are just like me.”
With that thought I picked up a phone and dialed a friend. (Back then, phones still had dials that clicked rather than buttons with digital tones.) He answered with a hello and I responded, “Hey, a group of us are going bowling, would you like to go?” He replied, “Sure. Who is going? I responded, “Well, right now, you and me, but I have a few more phone calls to make.” I didn’t see my comment as being dishonest. For the first time in my life, I was exhibiting a little bit of confidence in the future. That confidence paid off, and within the hour, there were more than a dozen of us who were included in a friendly game at the bowling alley. That idea, successfully proven, was about to gain momentum.
By the time I graduated from high school, I had some tremendous friends. For the first time in my life I knew what it was like to be so close that you could almost read each other’s minds. It was the closest I had ever come to being of one heart and one mind with someone else. I was fortunate to have really good friends – the kind that pressure you to do good things instead of things that are harmful. Many, many are still good friends. (In fact, you are probably a good number who are actually reading this blog. Cool.)
Attending the University of Utah gave me a new perspective on confidence. I realized that if you acted like you knew what you were doing (instead of being a lost freshman) that people just assumed you did. Better yet, they like being around you because of it. Confidence, if not overbearing, seems to attract other people because it offers some security. Funny thing, much like being happy, confidence is a choice. Deciding to be brave isn’t easy, but it isn’t as hard as it looks either. I am glad I have seen both sides, or I wouldn’t have believed it. My confidence grew and so did my group of friends. Having a little bit of confidence helped me for the next phase in my life.
Serving a two-year mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Looking back, I would do it again in a heartbeat. I loved it, and I find I am often a little jealous of young missionaries who are just leaving home for the first time. I think the biggest reason is because of the friends I made.
Again, I found that there were a lot of people who were just like me. They were looking for something, but they were waiting around for someone to come find them. Unfortunately, they hadn’t figured out my little phone trick, and they hadn’t quite figured out what they were missing in life. It was such an amazing experience to share some of the things that have made me wonderfully happy in my life and see that they then became happy, too. But the best part was the relationships.
I recognized that after having a discussion about deeper things, especially things that are eternally true and yet very relevant to now, had a profound affect. One little taste and I was hooked. In a short period of a couple weeks, I found that I felt as close to some of my newest friends as I had to friends that I had known a good part of my life. I marveled at how that could be possible and I observed one common thread every time. When we talked about deeper things, we invited the Holy Ghost to bear witness of the truthfulness of the things that we said. That is His divine role, to testify of divine truths. When that happens, I think we get a reminder of what we felt when we lived in heaven before coming to this earth. It is as though we feel a little piece of home, and we long for it. We yearn for it. And then we crave to have that feeling in our life more and more. It was this feeling, the feeling of having a member of the Godhead included in a new friendship that created a powerful bond as deep as eternity.
Since then I have pondered on what I can do to be a better friend, and how I can be of most help to someone else. I suppose that is why, when I have a chance to share something, that I prefer to share the things that I value most. That is if I know the listening party is interested.
The next phase of my friendship development was meeting and marrying my wife. Though that makes it sound pretty quick it wasn’t quite that fast, but almost. It was here that I found my very best friend in the world. (Thanks, Liz.) I am a romantic at heart, and that part of our relationship has been wonderful, but there has been more that has made our relationship deeper. Together we learned to become one, to have one heart and one mind. I had a taste of that when I was younger, but only to a smaller degree in comparison. Together we found a strong unity that has been the glue in our marriage. Unity is power, and love is a great motivator. These alone should be motivation for finding one to whom you can be true and faithful. Fifteen years of marriage is just the beginning of a friendship we plan to last forever.
During our marriage, other friends have punctuated the paragraphs of our lives like a recurring theme or storyline. Just at the right moments we have had epiphanies of significant importance, and those friends have been there to help, encourage, and inspire. Many times they were there at the moment they were needed the most, in answer to prayer. It has been those friends who have helped to build a shed in the backyard or re-shingle a house. Those are the friends who have invited us to yet another barbeque on the patio or a surprise birthday party for another friend. We have played sports on the field and on the court. We have shared experiences, ideals, goals, thoughts, and prized moments. Without exception, the strongest of those relationships have also had one familiar thread – Father’s hand was in all of them. He brought us together, and He was the one thing we had most in common – He as well as His Son, and our Savior, Jesus Christ. The influence of the Holy Ghost has made all the difference in the feelings we feel when we share deep and significant things. These have been powerful relationships.
This year, however, the year of friendships, has been different. Beginning with a stage production of Savior of the World, where our family all had a chance to participate, my life began to change. Perhaps it had something to do with the role I had to play. Part of it may have been the way that others saw me in addition to what I felt myself. Part of it was definitely my focus on deeper things. Through the experience of thinking about the life and resurrection of Jesus Christ, His sacrifice and His atonement, as we rehearsed, sang, and performed, each of us knew Him a little better than before. Each of us wanted to know Him more than we had before. Most importantly, each of us learned what it meant to worship Him and to feel closer to Him. That is the most beautiful feeling I have ever experienced. Sharing that experience with many others who had the same desire was more powerful than anything else I have known. Love. Unity. Commitment. We felt these and an overwhelming feeling of closeness to God as we focused our lives on Him.
A beautiful thing happens at the Last Supper of our Lord before he offered Himself a sacrifice and ransom for all of us. It happens in the name he gives to His disciples because of their faith. Jesus said, “Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.” (John 15:14-15) What an incredible statement of appreciation for the God of this world to speak to us and call us friend. What a privilege to have Him share that which He treasures.
With this new insight, I yearned like I never had before. I prayed for charity and to feel the love of God like I had not before. I was given new understanding and received according to my prayers. I was given new friends. The friends that I had before became more important to me, and closer, too. Some friends, unlooked for, became especially close. My own wife and children became greater friends and a greater strength to me. Other family members became closer to my heart. They have each been an answer to my prayers. Like Jesus said to his disciples, “that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you. These things I command you, that ye love one another.” (John 15:16-17)
From friends I have learned to care more deeply. I have cared for more, and I have been cared for by many others. Yet, in spite of the increase, I have come to value relationships with individuals especially, one at a time. I have treasured the importance of “one” the most. There is strength in a group, but there is power in being one.
Interestingly I have found friends in unexpected places. I have renewed old acquaintances via the internet and social networks, and I have made new friends by accomplishing common objectives with strangers. I have even discovered friends among the homeless on the streets. With each, my heart has gotten wider with a desire to be one.
In His intercessory prayer, Jesus prays to the Father that his disciples may be one as He and the Father are one. He continues, “Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.” (John 17:11, 20-21) This is the path for all those who wish to be with Him in the celestial kingdom of our Father.
As I reflect on examples of friendship in the scriptures, my mind always turns to Jonathan, son of Saul, and friend of David. He was the heir to the throne of his father and yet he loved his friend more. The scripture says, “the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” While his father was the king, Jonathan’s loyalty was to David, because he saw that the spirit of the Lord was with him. Jonathan not only gave him his clothing and his robe, he risked his life repeatedly to save his friend. (1 Samuel 18:1-4) He cared not for the honor of a throne, but only of the honor of his friend. Jonathan understood deep and meaningful relationships. They were his treasure.
Friendships have become my treasure. “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” (3 Nephi 13:21) The deeper the friendship, the greater the treasure. I have been given many gifts this year, but friendship is the greatest of them all. I believe this is also because true friendship is charity, which never faileth. For those who have ever been a friend, I thank you. Your love and prayers have been a great strength. For you who have loved the most, I thank the most for a debt that I will never be able to repay. I have definitely been changed for the better.
Looking back on my childhood, and my desire for friends, I think I have come a long way. I have been blessed abundantly. Fortunately, I can still remember what it was like to want, to long, and to yearn. With that in mind, I now wonder, “Who is the next friend I will make? Are they disguised as a stranger or a beggar? Are they waiting around for someone to come find them? Where can I make a difference for someone else today?” Perhaps they are waiting to have a discussion about deeper things but have only yet to realize it. The only way to find out is to keep looking for friends. That is when discoveries are made.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Monday, December 28, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Brilliant Light
Christmas morning usually brings about a parental role reversal in our house. Consistently, our children have taken it upon themselves to lead an energetic charge of figurative reveille, minus the bugle. Their sole purpose is to get two very tired parents out of bed. Some day they will understand. Some day we will miss this morning ritual that happens once a year.
In more recent years, we have imposed a rule that Christmas can’t come until 7:00 AM. No buts. The rule mostly works, with a few minor glitches. Our kids may not wake us up deliberately, but we can usually hear their voices just outside our bedroom door, watching the clock and giggling with anticipation. It provides us an opportunity to be slightly disappointed about missing that last 15 minutes of craved-for sleep. But then a smile dawns on our faces, knowing that one of our favorite days of the year has arrived. With a mix of reluctance and excitement, we get out of bed.
Amidst the pleasant anxiety in the air, the morning has a few other procedures of policy that are to be followed carefully. Mom and Dad are the first to go downstairs to the living room. Press conference cameras have to be ready and in position to capture one more memory that will fade all too fast. One of us will take the still shot and the other will take video. We try not to hide behind the cameras too much. There is something to be said about living in the moment rather than always anticipating the future or remembering the past. Still, preserving the past for some future re-run of memories has given us great satisfaction from time to time.
Under the Christmas tree is an “urban sprawl” display of presents. Numbers multiply quickly in a family of seven. It doesn’t take much to cover the small floor of our living room with gifts of affection. The family presents that have been under the tree for days take a back seat to the wrapped presents left by Santa. (I have it on good authority that Santa really likes the cookies and milk the kids leave for him. I wonder about the carrots left for Rudolph.) After the “Santa presents” have been unearthed and enjoyed, we take a break to indulge in a family tradition of eating orange flavored sweet rolls. Properly fed and satisfied, we go back and open gifts given to each other.
Christmas morning has always been beautiful. It is a golden moment that has never left us disappointed. There is a beautiful glow that emanates from each of our children, and not just the Christmas tree lights. They are happy, excited, full of gratitude and love. Liz and I cherish these few remaining Christmas moments with our children at home. There is a greater reluctance to move on as our children unavoidably approach adulthood. In not many years they will be starting families and traditions of their own. This expectation makes it easier to give up the craved-for sleep that we could use a little more of now.
There is one procedure of policy that I didn’t mention in regard to our Christmas morning procession. It is small but essential to our household. Our children have come to accept it because it is just what we do. After Mom and Dad are aroused and have offered our own personal prayers, we invite the children into our bedroom to read from the scriptures. Their own scriptures are ready and waiting for them, prepared the night before. The presents under the tree can wait a little longer. We usually read some passages about the birth of the Savior Jesus Christ, and the love of God. Granted, there is only so much that can be discussed when the mind is distracted by the unknown wonder of what is waiting in the living room. But, first things first, we set the table of our hearts with proper etiquette and place settings. Turning on the brilliant light in our hearts on this special day illuminates everything else we do. We then pray as a family, thanking Father for another wonderful year and for the many, many blessings He has given us. With these preparations complete, we are ready to go down and enjoy the morning.
Regarding the advent of the first coming of Jesus Christ, the apostle John recorded, “In the beginning was the gospel preached through the Son. And the gospel was the word, and the word was with the Son, and the Son was with God, and the Son was of God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without him was not anything made which was made. In him was the gospel, and the gospel was the life, and the life was the light of men; And the light shineth in the world, and the world perceiveth it not.” (JST John 1:1-5)
The Son, who was with the Father and created all things, consented to be born on earth as a little babe in a stable. Jesus did this for us to provide us with brilliant light – the light of His life, the light of His example, and the light of His love. He gave us everything He had so that we might have life eternal with Him. His very life was a gift to us.
Jesus is “the true light, which lighteth every man who cometh into the world; Even the Son of God.” He was “made flesh, and sent unto us by the will of the Father, And as many as believe on his name shall receive of his fulness. And of his fullness have all we received, even immortality and eternal life, through his grace.” (JST John 1:10, 16)
“John the Baptist bore record, “He received a fulness of truth, yea, even of all truth; And no man receiveth a fulness unless he keepeth his commandments. He that keepeth his commandments receiveth truth and light, until he is glorified in truth and knoweth all things.” (D&C 93:26-28) We give glory to God, when we forsake the evil one and choose the light instead.
The first advent of the Savior was as soft as the light of a star lighting upon the ground. That was His season to come in meekness and humility. We feel His love, and then we share it. In return we feel more love from Him and from others. The gift of love provides a wonderful light by which all may see. It is by this light that we may truly prepare to see Him again.
The Lord revealed to Joseph Smith, “It shall come to pass that every soul who forsaketh his sins and cometh unto me, and calleth on my name, and obeyeth my voice, and keepeth my commandments, shall see my face and know that I am; And that I am the true light that lighteth every man that cometh into the world.”
If we seek Him, if we seek this Jesus of whom the prophets have testified and wise men have witnessed, we shall find Him. Someday we will understand. Hopefully we do not secretly hope that He will delay His coming because it is easier to sleep, or because our Christmas preparations are not yet ready. While it may not be tomorrow, the second advent of the Savior Jesus Christ is nearer. We may not see Him now, but if we are listening we will recognize His voice at the door as He calls to us to follow him. Then will a smile dawn on our faces, knowing that another special season has arrived – a Christmas of a different kind. I look forward to seeing that brilliant light. I look forward to the time when I will be sufficiently prepared. I anxiously await the time when I can greet him on a new Christmas morning.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
In more recent years, we have imposed a rule that Christmas can’t come until 7:00 AM. No buts. The rule mostly works, with a few minor glitches. Our kids may not wake us up deliberately, but we can usually hear their voices just outside our bedroom door, watching the clock and giggling with anticipation. It provides us an opportunity to be slightly disappointed about missing that last 15 minutes of craved-for sleep. But then a smile dawns on our faces, knowing that one of our favorite days of the year has arrived. With a mix of reluctance and excitement, we get out of bed.
Amidst the pleasant anxiety in the air, the morning has a few other procedures of policy that are to be followed carefully. Mom and Dad are the first to go downstairs to the living room. Press conference cameras have to be ready and in position to capture one more memory that will fade all too fast. One of us will take the still shot and the other will take video. We try not to hide behind the cameras too much. There is something to be said about living in the moment rather than always anticipating the future or remembering the past. Still, preserving the past for some future re-run of memories has given us great satisfaction from time to time.
Under the Christmas tree is an “urban sprawl” display of presents. Numbers multiply quickly in a family of seven. It doesn’t take much to cover the small floor of our living room with gifts of affection. The family presents that have been under the tree for days take a back seat to the wrapped presents left by Santa. (I have it on good authority that Santa really likes the cookies and milk the kids leave for him. I wonder about the carrots left for Rudolph.) After the “Santa presents” have been unearthed and enjoyed, we take a break to indulge in a family tradition of eating orange flavored sweet rolls. Properly fed and satisfied, we go back and open gifts given to each other.
Christmas morning has always been beautiful. It is a golden moment that has never left us disappointed. There is a beautiful glow that emanates from each of our children, and not just the Christmas tree lights. They are happy, excited, full of gratitude and love. Liz and I cherish these few remaining Christmas moments with our children at home. There is a greater reluctance to move on as our children unavoidably approach adulthood. In not many years they will be starting families and traditions of their own. This expectation makes it easier to give up the craved-for sleep that we could use a little more of now.
There is one procedure of policy that I didn’t mention in regard to our Christmas morning procession. It is small but essential to our household. Our children have come to accept it because it is just what we do. After Mom and Dad are aroused and have offered our own personal prayers, we invite the children into our bedroom to read from the scriptures. Their own scriptures are ready and waiting for them, prepared the night before. The presents under the tree can wait a little longer. We usually read some passages about the birth of the Savior Jesus Christ, and the love of God. Granted, there is only so much that can be discussed when the mind is distracted by the unknown wonder of what is waiting in the living room. But, first things first, we set the table of our hearts with proper etiquette and place settings. Turning on the brilliant light in our hearts on this special day illuminates everything else we do. We then pray as a family, thanking Father for another wonderful year and for the many, many blessings He has given us. With these preparations complete, we are ready to go down and enjoy the morning.
Regarding the advent of the first coming of Jesus Christ, the apostle John recorded, “In the beginning was the gospel preached through the Son. And the gospel was the word, and the word was with the Son, and the Son was with God, and the Son was of God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without him was not anything made which was made. In him was the gospel, and the gospel was the life, and the life was the light of men; And the light shineth in the world, and the world perceiveth it not.” (JST John 1:1-5)
The Son, who was with the Father and created all things, consented to be born on earth as a little babe in a stable. Jesus did this for us to provide us with brilliant light – the light of His life, the light of His example, and the light of His love. He gave us everything He had so that we might have life eternal with Him. His very life was a gift to us.
Jesus is “the true light, which lighteth every man who cometh into the world; Even the Son of God.” He was “made flesh, and sent unto us by the will of the Father, And as many as believe on his name shall receive of his fulness. And of his fullness have all we received, even immortality and eternal life, through his grace.” (JST John 1:10, 16)
“John the Baptist bore record, “He received a fulness of truth, yea, even of all truth; And no man receiveth a fulness unless he keepeth his commandments. He that keepeth his commandments receiveth truth and light, until he is glorified in truth and knoweth all things.” (D&C 93:26-28) We give glory to God, when we forsake the evil one and choose the light instead.
The first advent of the Savior was as soft as the light of a star lighting upon the ground. That was His season to come in meekness and humility. We feel His love, and then we share it. In return we feel more love from Him and from others. The gift of love provides a wonderful light by which all may see. It is by this light that we may truly prepare to see Him again.
The Lord revealed to Joseph Smith, “It shall come to pass that every soul who forsaketh his sins and cometh unto me, and calleth on my name, and obeyeth my voice, and keepeth my commandments, shall see my face and know that I am; And that I am the true light that lighteth every man that cometh into the world.”
If we seek Him, if we seek this Jesus of whom the prophets have testified and wise men have witnessed, we shall find Him. Someday we will understand. Hopefully we do not secretly hope that He will delay His coming because it is easier to sleep, or because our Christmas preparations are not yet ready. While it may not be tomorrow, the second advent of the Savior Jesus Christ is nearer. We may not see Him now, but if we are listening we will recognize His voice at the door as He calls to us to follow him. Then will a smile dawn on our faces, knowing that another special season has arrived – a Christmas of a different kind. I look forward to seeing that brilliant light. I look forward to the time when I will be sufficiently prepared. I anxiously await the time when I can greet him on a new Christmas morning.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Pianos and Heartstrings
The piano in the living room of our home had never been tuned until a few weeks ago. A good tuning was long over due. I say this, not because it made a terrible noise, but because the piano happens to be older than I am.
Before finding a new home, the simple but warm piano used to stand against the wall of a very small room in my parents house where I grew up. The room, adjacent to our living room, was part of a small addition Dad had built on the house. Besides the piano and bench, the only other things in the crowded room were a small bookshelf, a lounge chair, and a lamp. It was a cozy place to sit and read, or listen to your sister play the piano.
I have some fond memories of that piano. I never really learned to play it very well, but I pretended to be a composer of cacophony when I was little. I would bang on things I am not certain even qualify as chords, let alone harmonies, and I would sing made up songs to my accompaniments. I had a very small audience. Mom would occasionally remind me that I had other things to do besides play the piano. She was patient with my unwritten compositions.
At the recommendation of a close friend, we had a piano tuner come look at our upright. The tuning took twice as long as he expected and it required two separate visits. He vacuumed out the inside of the piano and found no less than a full inch of dust that had collected on the bottom of the inside. It was very intriguing to watch the piano dismantled enough to tune each of the strings.
Previously, I thought our piano sounded fine, especially when played by someone with talent. Its relative pitch had been fairly good because all of the tones had gone flat together, making the need to fix it less apparent. Now that it has been tuned, it sounds much, much better.
I realize now that my original appraisal was based on the fact that I was comfortable with the sound and was simply used to it. There is a lot to be said for familiarity. When we are very familiar with something, or someone, it is easy to overlook small quirks and irregularities, particularly if it is something we are fond of. I was used to the piano being out of tune, so it didn’t seem out of tune. It merely seemed like what it was – our good old upright piano. This says a lot to me about the things or people we become familiar with.
Our oldest son seems to show the most interest in playing the piano now. He has become quite proficient at it too. He can sit down at the bench, place his feet on the pedals with his hands on the keys, and something wonderful begins to happen. This instrument of wood, string, and connections changes me. He will play things I could never dream of at his age. As he does, I begin to daydream and his music takes me to places I have not been. Music is powerful that way.
For many years I have reflected on this power of music. I can’t explain why it does what it does, but I feel it. I have heard music that has changed my feelings and mood. I have sung music that has caused me to swell with emotion. I have experienced music that has moved my heart to action. There is something unique about music that causes it to resonate in my heart. Because it does, I have recognized that there are two sounding boards at work, one in the piano and the other inside me. This observation has led me to believe that both the piano and the heart are powerful instruments.
A friend of mine, Allan Smith, recently taught me about resonance. Allan is a sound engineer who has a passion for physics. We both work on buildings and share an interest in architectural spaces. His fascination with how things resonate has intrigued me enough to share his interest in physics and look a little closer at instruments.
One reason a piano sounds as beautiful as it does (or can, once it is tuned) is because of a component called the sounding board. The sounding board of a stringed instrument is typically, but not always, a hard surface. It takes the vibrations of a string and amplifies them to create a more audible sound. As the hard surface experiences the gentle vibrations of the string, it begins to vibrate at the same frequency. The sounding board takes the vibration and gives it a larger effect.
Personally speaking, I think our actions are really the sounding board for our hearts. They definitely resonate at the same frequency as our desires and usually reflect what is deep inside. While our hearts perform best when they are not hard, our examples resonate best when they are firm with resolve. At least, those are the examples that resonate best with me. Without the sounding board, the heart has little effect on others. But with it, the heart can do amazing things, for good or not.
When we are properly tuned, we will hear beautiful things. To tune an instrument, the one performing the work will compare and adjust the instrument to meet a standard. Inside a piano, the keys are connected to little hammers that touch the strings causing them to vibrate. For ourselves, the little promptings of the Holy Ghost may touch our hearts, causing them to vibrate, move, enlarge, and even swell. It doesn’t take much if we are in tune and ready to receive. When we are properly tuned with the promptings of the Holy Ghost, it is easier to be in harmony with the laws and commandments of the gospel.
When something powerful touches our heart, it resonates within us. You might say that, “It rings true.” This happens for a few different reasons. First, one role of the Holy Ghost is to testify of truth. When we feel truth, we can also feel the witness of the Spirit. We can feel it resonate. Secondly, the Holy Ghost will bring all things to our remembrance. This happens “within us,” within our realm of experience both in this life and the life before. Resonance has a lot to do with familiarity. The more familiar we are with the truths of the gospel, the more they will strike a cord with what we know and have experienced. Our taste in this music increases and grows with time and repetition, layer by layer, and line upon line. As our examples resemble that of the Savior, Jesus Christ, the familiarity with which we know Him will ring clearer and clearer.
Following the resurrection of Jesus Christ, He walked with two disciples on the road to Emmaus and taught them. After He dined with them, their eyes were opened and the things they had been taught resonated true. “And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures.” (Luke 24:32) Their hearts, properly tuned, were instruments that allowed each of them to feel the power of His word.
In the Book of Mormon, the Prophet Alma compares the word of God to a seed. For the purpose of this comparison, we may use this example to see what happens when truths are placed in our hearts to see how they will resonate. If we are in tune, and we seek to be in harmony with God, Alma teaches that the word of God will begin to swell within us, “and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that… the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me.” (Alma 32:28) It will resonate within your heart.
The term heartstrings often refers to things that pull at our hearts, or our desires. These strings cannot pull much unless they are tight from tension, connecting our desires and our actions. When the Holy Spirit touches our heartstrings, we will see very quickly whether or not we are in tune with the standard of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. If we have a sound understanding and seek to do the will of the Father, we will likely feel at peace. If our hearts are not quite aligned, we may feel discord or cacophony, suggesting that we need to realign our hearts and have them tuned.
A simple test to see if we need a tune up, is to ask the questions, “Am I willing to put God first? Am I willing to yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit? Am I willing to submit to Father and undergo a change that will make me more like Him?” If we are not willing, a follow up question of, “why,” may suggest which strings need to be adjusted most. Hopefully, for most of us, it is only a few strings that are out of key and not the whole piano.
The prophet Alma further teaches us that being willing to experience this change of heart is synonymous to being spiritually born of God. This change allows us to receive the image of God within our countenances. He then asks a telling question, “if ye have experienced a change of heart, and if ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?” (Alma 5:14, 26) This suggests to me that even though we have done good things in the past, and have felt the desire to serve God, our hearts are in need of constant tuning.
One thing that can help us to maintain these strong feelings in our hearts is to stay close to the Lord. If we remain steadfast and anchor our hearts with our faith in God, it is harder for them to wander. It is harder for them to slacken and get out of key. Tying our heartstrings to the will of God is the safest way to keep them properly tuned.
I have fond memories of our old upright in the small room of my parent’s home. I have newer memories of my son playing the same piano, properly tuned. With a little bit of care and attention the instrument is performing better than ever, ready for the next song to be discovered.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Before finding a new home, the simple but warm piano used to stand against the wall of a very small room in my parents house where I grew up. The room, adjacent to our living room, was part of a small addition Dad had built on the house. Besides the piano and bench, the only other things in the crowded room were a small bookshelf, a lounge chair, and a lamp. It was a cozy place to sit and read, or listen to your sister play the piano.
I have some fond memories of that piano. I never really learned to play it very well, but I pretended to be a composer of cacophony when I was little. I would bang on things I am not certain even qualify as chords, let alone harmonies, and I would sing made up songs to my accompaniments. I had a very small audience. Mom would occasionally remind me that I had other things to do besides play the piano. She was patient with my unwritten compositions.
At the recommendation of a close friend, we had a piano tuner come look at our upright. The tuning took twice as long as he expected and it required two separate visits. He vacuumed out the inside of the piano and found no less than a full inch of dust that had collected on the bottom of the inside. It was very intriguing to watch the piano dismantled enough to tune each of the strings.
Previously, I thought our piano sounded fine, especially when played by someone with talent. Its relative pitch had been fairly good because all of the tones had gone flat together, making the need to fix it less apparent. Now that it has been tuned, it sounds much, much better.
I realize now that my original appraisal was based on the fact that I was comfortable with the sound and was simply used to it. There is a lot to be said for familiarity. When we are very familiar with something, or someone, it is easy to overlook small quirks and irregularities, particularly if it is something we are fond of. I was used to the piano being out of tune, so it didn’t seem out of tune. It merely seemed like what it was – our good old upright piano. This says a lot to me about the things or people we become familiar with.
Our oldest son seems to show the most interest in playing the piano now. He has become quite proficient at it too. He can sit down at the bench, place his feet on the pedals with his hands on the keys, and something wonderful begins to happen. This instrument of wood, string, and connections changes me. He will play things I could never dream of at his age. As he does, I begin to daydream and his music takes me to places I have not been. Music is powerful that way.
For many years I have reflected on this power of music. I can’t explain why it does what it does, but I feel it. I have heard music that has changed my feelings and mood. I have sung music that has caused me to swell with emotion. I have experienced music that has moved my heart to action. There is something unique about music that causes it to resonate in my heart. Because it does, I have recognized that there are two sounding boards at work, one in the piano and the other inside me. This observation has led me to believe that both the piano and the heart are powerful instruments.
A friend of mine, Allan Smith, recently taught me about resonance. Allan is a sound engineer who has a passion for physics. We both work on buildings and share an interest in architectural spaces. His fascination with how things resonate has intrigued me enough to share his interest in physics and look a little closer at instruments.
One reason a piano sounds as beautiful as it does (or can, once it is tuned) is because of a component called the sounding board. The sounding board of a stringed instrument is typically, but not always, a hard surface. It takes the vibrations of a string and amplifies them to create a more audible sound. As the hard surface experiences the gentle vibrations of the string, it begins to vibrate at the same frequency. The sounding board takes the vibration and gives it a larger effect.
Personally speaking, I think our actions are really the sounding board for our hearts. They definitely resonate at the same frequency as our desires and usually reflect what is deep inside. While our hearts perform best when they are not hard, our examples resonate best when they are firm with resolve. At least, those are the examples that resonate best with me. Without the sounding board, the heart has little effect on others. But with it, the heart can do amazing things, for good or not.
When we are properly tuned, we will hear beautiful things. To tune an instrument, the one performing the work will compare and adjust the instrument to meet a standard. Inside a piano, the keys are connected to little hammers that touch the strings causing them to vibrate. For ourselves, the little promptings of the Holy Ghost may touch our hearts, causing them to vibrate, move, enlarge, and even swell. It doesn’t take much if we are in tune and ready to receive. When we are properly tuned with the promptings of the Holy Ghost, it is easier to be in harmony with the laws and commandments of the gospel.
When something powerful touches our heart, it resonates within us. You might say that, “It rings true.” This happens for a few different reasons. First, one role of the Holy Ghost is to testify of truth. When we feel truth, we can also feel the witness of the Spirit. We can feel it resonate. Secondly, the Holy Ghost will bring all things to our remembrance. This happens “within us,” within our realm of experience both in this life and the life before. Resonance has a lot to do with familiarity. The more familiar we are with the truths of the gospel, the more they will strike a cord with what we know and have experienced. Our taste in this music increases and grows with time and repetition, layer by layer, and line upon line. As our examples resemble that of the Savior, Jesus Christ, the familiarity with which we know Him will ring clearer and clearer.
Following the resurrection of Jesus Christ, He walked with two disciples on the road to Emmaus and taught them. After He dined with them, their eyes were opened and the things they had been taught resonated true. “And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures.” (Luke 24:32) Their hearts, properly tuned, were instruments that allowed each of them to feel the power of His word.
In the Book of Mormon, the Prophet Alma compares the word of God to a seed. For the purpose of this comparison, we may use this example to see what happens when truths are placed in our hearts to see how they will resonate. If we are in tune, and we seek to be in harmony with God, Alma teaches that the word of God will begin to swell within us, “and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that… the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me.” (Alma 32:28) It will resonate within your heart.
The term heartstrings often refers to things that pull at our hearts, or our desires. These strings cannot pull much unless they are tight from tension, connecting our desires and our actions. When the Holy Spirit touches our heartstrings, we will see very quickly whether or not we are in tune with the standard of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. If we have a sound understanding and seek to do the will of the Father, we will likely feel at peace. If our hearts are not quite aligned, we may feel discord or cacophony, suggesting that we need to realign our hearts and have them tuned.
A simple test to see if we need a tune up, is to ask the questions, “Am I willing to put God first? Am I willing to yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit? Am I willing to submit to Father and undergo a change that will make me more like Him?” If we are not willing, a follow up question of, “why,” may suggest which strings need to be adjusted most. Hopefully, for most of us, it is only a few strings that are out of key and not the whole piano.
The prophet Alma further teaches us that being willing to experience this change of heart is synonymous to being spiritually born of God. This change allows us to receive the image of God within our countenances. He then asks a telling question, “if ye have experienced a change of heart, and if ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?” (Alma 5:14, 26) This suggests to me that even though we have done good things in the past, and have felt the desire to serve God, our hearts are in need of constant tuning.
One thing that can help us to maintain these strong feelings in our hearts is to stay close to the Lord. If we remain steadfast and anchor our hearts with our faith in God, it is harder for them to wander. It is harder for them to slacken and get out of key. Tying our heartstrings to the will of God is the safest way to keep them properly tuned.
I have fond memories of our old upright in the small room of my parent’s home. I have newer memories of my son playing the same piano, properly tuned. With a little bit of care and attention the instrument is performing better than ever, ready for the next song to be discovered.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Gifts
Each November after Thanksgiving we have a tradition of driving into the Uinta Mountains to cut down a Christmas tree. The permit to cut a tree doesn’t cost much. We spend a lot more on gas for the two hour drive each way. But the memories we pay for are worth the cost.
Personally, I value the tradition much more than the tree. The conversation with family on the way, the company of excellent friends, the hike in the snow while looking for the perfect tree, an occasional snowball fight, the satisfaction of finding said tree, and the reward of delicious treats when we return with our trophies are all part of the experience. (I like treats.) It is a fun tradition to share. We are gone most of the day, but the time seems to go too quickly. I have yet to find a clock with good brakes. As you might guess from my description, the tree really isn’t the focus.
Once the tree is placed in our living room, and a bottle of Sprite is drained and mixed with water to give the tree a drink, we begin decorating. We decorate the house and the tree, both. Our family doesn’t decorate for most holidays, but we do for Christmas. It has little to do with worship of the Savior, perhaps, but it does warm up our home. It puts us in a different mood, a little more ready to share.
Giving our kids a Christmas ornament each year is another tradition we have. After more than a decade of raising five children, we have also increased the number of ornaments on our tree. It’s quite the menagerie and assortment, including figurines of ballerinas, Darth Vader, a piano, princesses, race cars, a black bear from Yellowstone, Mickey Mouse, a guitar, Tinker Bell, and a few different Santa Clauses. Each ornament represents the personal interest or an experience shared by one of our kids for the year that the ornament was given. It’s almost like a dangling journal or diary of sorts.
With the tree properly decorated, the gifts to each other begin to arrive beneath the tree. Some years there are more gifts than others. Some gifts are recycled as one of the youngest in the family gives someone else an item they were once fond of. (We see this as generous rather than cheap.) This year will probably see fewer new gifts beneath the boughs than in the past. The recession has been a different kind of gift. But the amount doesn’t seem to matter. Christmas is a holiday of worship and sharing, and we like to do both.
I am not one for a lot of commercialism, but I love to give gifts. Though I tend to avoid sales, and crowds, and fluff, I like to give something that, even in a small way, says, “I love you,” with perfect clarity. It drives my wife nuts when we set a budget for gifts, because we inevitably have to find a way to rob Peter to pay Paul after I am finished. It isn’t much, and I don’t think I am irresponsible, but it usually involves my time, talents, and the things I have been given. Okay, perhaps this is a justification more than anything, but I like to think that “because I have been given much, I too must give.” (Hymns, 219) When Liz reads this, she will likely grin with an expression on her face that says, “I can see right through your reasons.” Even if she is right, I would rather share than not.
Different from when I was a kid, I don’t care much about receiving presents any more. I have been the recipient of so many blessings from Father that I am happy if I am not given anything. It is gift enough to know that my gifts are received and appreciated and that love is felt in return. That works out well since Liz and I are outnumbered two to five. Our kids love us, and we feel it.
Because this time of year is a time of worship and sharing, it does help me to keep the giving season of Christmas in proper perspective when I consider the best gifts and why they are given. After I think about kids waiting in line to sit on Santa’s lap at the mall or some gathering of friends or co-workers, I also think about the oft repeated instruction by the Savior, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8)
While living in Kirtland, Ohio, Joseph Smith was instructed by the Lord on what we should ask for. He was told, “But ye are commanded in all things to ask of God, who giveth liberally; and that which the Spirit testifies unto you even so I would that ye should do….” He continues, “seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given…. For… they are given for the benefit of those who love me and keep all my commandments, and him that seeketh so to do; that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me….” (D&C 46:7-9) If we lack a gift of the spirit that can help us and help others, we should pray earnestly for that gift.
I learn two important keys about asking as I read this passage of scripture. First, we are commanded to ask for the things we do not have. There is a difference between coveting, stealing, and taking, and the instruction to trust, ask, and rely upon Father. When we rely upon Him in faith, He answers our prayers. Secondly, this instruction is not for the perfect or even just those who keep all of Father’s commandments. He promises blessings for those who “seek so to do.” If we are trying, sincerely, He will see our efforts and will more than match them. It also helps if we are earnestly seeking the best gifts.
In a commercialized culture, “best” often refers to the most for the least. It is more and more of what I want. It may include good deals, bargains, and sales. On the other hand, it may be a long list of material things on our grown-up Christmas lists that typically I can only dream of because my wallet always falls short. But these things are not always best for us. Even if we receive them, they may not be gifts.
Yesterday, my oldest son and I were talking about one of his recent needs that he can’t afford at the moment. I thought his need was valid but perhaps bordered on the threshold of wants. Until he could afford the item he wanted, I suggested that he learn to make do. Then I shared a principle that has been very effective in my life.
Many times I find that I have a need for something that I can’t afford. I follow the instruction to pray about it and I tell Father what I need. I then determine in my heart that I will be content with what I have received, and what I may receive. Then I let it go. It’s not that I forget about my need. I still work towards it, but I try not to set my heart on it. When I can demonstrate to Father that I care more about Him than I do the things of this world, He usually gives me what I want anyway. It may not be immediately, but I often find that it is soon. This has worked repeatedly for me, time and time again, and I know that God hears and answers prayers. I have had too many prayers that have been answered to ever doubt again.
So what are the best gifts? If we are to seek them earnestly, then we should first consider what they are and why they are given. Here are a few thoughts.
The Gift of the Holy Ghost
Wilford Woodruff, the fourth president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints taught that the gift of the Holy Ghost is the greatest gift that can be given to man in mortality. He said, “there is no greater gift, there is no greater blessing, there is no greater testimony given to any man on earth.” (Deseret Weekly, April 6, 1889, 451.) Why is this gift so great? Because the Holy Ghost is a member of the Godhead, or Trinity if you will. To feel His influence and follow on a daily basis is to walk with God. If you have ever wanted help to do something hard, what better help could you ask for than to hold His hand through a difficult trial, knowing that He will lead you safely through it. This is a gift that is received through confirmation after an individual has been baptized as described in the scriptures. The gift is operable anytime we are in need and seek to keep Father’s commandments. Anyone who seeks this gift can have it. Once we have been given the gift, others around us can feel that gift through us. We can share this gift and inspire others to seek the gift, too. This gift has the sustaining power to see all of Father’s children safely home.
The Gift of Eternal Life
In a revelation given through Joseph Smith the Prophet to David Whitmer, the Lord revealed, “Therefore, if you will ask of me you shall receive; if you will knock it shall be opened unto you. Seek to bring forth and establish my Zion. Keep my commandments in all things. And if you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God.” (D&C 14:5-7)
The gift of eternal life is the greatest gift possible because it is the gift that allows us to become like our Father. It is the gift that binds us to our Savior. With this gift, we are promised an inheritance of all that the Father hath. This means He will share His knowledge, His power, His wisdom, His glory, His kingdom, and worlds and eternities without end. Suffice it to say that we cannot comprehend what this really includes. But we know that He is willing to give us everything, holding nothing back, when we are willing to follow Him and keep His commandments.
The Gift of Charity
Mormon, a prophet in ancient America taught about another important gift, even the gift of charity. He said, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail— But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.” If we seek for charity, which is the pure love of Christ, we cannot fail.
We are further instructed how to receive this gift which is the greatest of all. Mormon continues, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; … that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure.” (Moroni 7:46-48)
The Gift of the Fruit of the Tree of Life
In a vision of the Tree of Life, the prophet, Lehi, saw a powerful symbol that can help each of us return to our heavenly home. The tree, which was a representation of ‘the love of God, which sheddeth itself abroad in the hearts of the children of men” is most desirable above all things. (1 Nephi 11:22) After eating some of the fruit, Lehi wanted to share with his family. He knew that the fruit was desirable to make one truly happy. He said, “it was most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted. Yea, and I beheld that the fruit thereof was white, to exceed all the whiteness that I had ever seen. And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy....” (1 Nephi 8:10-12) There is only one way to the fruit. It is a strait and narrow path that is marked with a rod of iron. As we follow the word of God, He will lead us in that path until we can taste the fruit for ourselves.
Love is the Gift of God Freely Given
A close examination of these last three gifts points out an interesting similarity. They are each the greatest, or the most desirable. Exaltation is the greatest gift. Charity is the greatest of all. The fruit of the tree of life is most desirable. If they are not all exaggerations, then perhaps they all refer to the greatest gift.
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13) Jesus was born into this world so that He could save us. He gave His life so that He might save us. Everything He has done has been for our salvation and exaltation. Salvation comes freely to all, making possible the resurrection. Exaltation can only come when we claim the gift that He so freely offers us.
The tree of life in Lehi’s vision represents the love of God, or the love of Christ. They are the same. Charity is the love of God, or the pure love of Christ. The fruit of which Lehi tasted and found to be more desirable than anything else. When we bear fruits of faith and repentance, we are led to the fruit of the tree of life, of eternal life. Each of these gifts are one and the same. God loves His children and wants them to be happy. He allows them to choose, to act and not be acted upon. The gift has been extended. It is up to us to choose – to reach toward Him to receive the gift or not.
The Gift of Agency Returned
Occasionally you may joke about a gift that you plan to return to the store because it didn’t fit or it wasn’t quite what you wanted. In a different sense, and for entirely opposite reasons, there is a gift that I think is worth returning, and we shouldn’t delay or wait until the day after Christmas to do it.
Like the recycled gifts of my youngest but well intended children, there is so very little that we can give to Father that is not already His. We have but a broken heart and a contrite spirit to offer. The apostle, Elder Neal A. Maxwell said, “as you submit your wills to God, you are giving Him the only thing you can actually give Him that is really yours to give. Don’t wait too long to find the altar or to begin to place the gift of your wills upon it! No need to wait for a receipt; the Lord has His own special ways of acknowledging.” (Ensign, May 2004, 44)
The gift of agency from Father to His children is the one thing that can give Him glory – because out of choice, we choose to become like Him. He allows us the freedom to choose for ourselves what we will do. He can’t force us. But when we submit to Him, and yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit by putting Him first, we demonstrate the amount of love we have for Him, be it great or small. Through our actions our gift is expressed. Through our love and agency returned, we give Him eternal glory.
I feel very blessed to have wonderful family and friends. This past year has been a real gift to me and I am changed for the better. I have never felt so much love and charity in all my life. The pure love of Christ is truly perfect love, and it is wonderful.
Christmas is a wonderful season of the year. It is not just a day. Christmas is an attitude and an opportunity. As we focus on the spirit of Christmas – the Spirit of the Lord – Father will grant unto us the gifts of the spirit that will lead us to the greatest gift of all. This is His gift. This is His desire, that we receive His gift by receiving Him into our hearts. As we do, we may feel Him say, “I love you,” with perfect clarity. May we all seek the love of God this Christmas season. May we ask for it, feel it, and then share it again and again.
http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/
Personally, I value the tradition much more than the tree. The conversation with family on the way, the company of excellent friends, the hike in the snow while looking for the perfect tree, an occasional snowball fight, the satisfaction of finding said tree, and the reward of delicious treats when we return with our trophies are all part of the experience. (I like treats.) It is a fun tradition to share. We are gone most of the day, but the time seems to go too quickly. I have yet to find a clock with good brakes. As you might guess from my description, the tree really isn’t the focus.
Once the tree is placed in our living room, and a bottle of Sprite is drained and mixed with water to give the tree a drink, we begin decorating. We decorate the house and the tree, both. Our family doesn’t decorate for most holidays, but we do for Christmas. It has little to do with worship of the Savior, perhaps, but it does warm up our home. It puts us in a different mood, a little more ready to share.
Giving our kids a Christmas ornament each year is another tradition we have. After more than a decade of raising five children, we have also increased the number of ornaments on our tree. It’s quite the menagerie and assortment, including figurines of ballerinas, Darth Vader, a piano, princesses, race cars, a black bear from Yellowstone, Mickey Mouse, a guitar, Tinker Bell, and a few different Santa Clauses. Each ornament represents the personal interest or an experience shared by one of our kids for the year that the ornament was given. It’s almost like a dangling journal or diary of sorts.
With the tree properly decorated, the gifts to each other begin to arrive beneath the tree. Some years there are more gifts than others. Some gifts are recycled as one of the youngest in the family gives someone else an item they were once fond of. (We see this as generous rather than cheap.) This year will probably see fewer new gifts beneath the boughs than in the past. The recession has been a different kind of gift. But the amount doesn’t seem to matter. Christmas is a holiday of worship and sharing, and we like to do both.
I am not one for a lot of commercialism, but I love to give gifts. Though I tend to avoid sales, and crowds, and fluff, I like to give something that, even in a small way, says, “I love you,” with perfect clarity. It drives my wife nuts when we set a budget for gifts, because we inevitably have to find a way to rob Peter to pay Paul after I am finished. It isn’t much, and I don’t think I am irresponsible, but it usually involves my time, talents, and the things I have been given. Okay, perhaps this is a justification more than anything, but I like to think that “because I have been given much, I too must give.” (Hymns, 219) When Liz reads this, she will likely grin with an expression on her face that says, “I can see right through your reasons.” Even if she is right, I would rather share than not.
Different from when I was a kid, I don’t care much about receiving presents any more. I have been the recipient of so many blessings from Father that I am happy if I am not given anything. It is gift enough to know that my gifts are received and appreciated and that love is felt in return. That works out well since Liz and I are outnumbered two to five. Our kids love us, and we feel it.
Because this time of year is a time of worship and sharing, it does help me to keep the giving season of Christmas in proper perspective when I consider the best gifts and why they are given. After I think about kids waiting in line to sit on Santa’s lap at the mall or some gathering of friends or co-workers, I also think about the oft repeated instruction by the Savior, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8)
While living in Kirtland, Ohio, Joseph Smith was instructed by the Lord on what we should ask for. He was told, “But ye are commanded in all things to ask of God, who giveth liberally; and that which the Spirit testifies unto you even so I would that ye should do….” He continues, “seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given…. For… they are given for the benefit of those who love me and keep all my commandments, and him that seeketh so to do; that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me….” (D&C 46:7-9) If we lack a gift of the spirit that can help us and help others, we should pray earnestly for that gift.
I learn two important keys about asking as I read this passage of scripture. First, we are commanded to ask for the things we do not have. There is a difference between coveting, stealing, and taking, and the instruction to trust, ask, and rely upon Father. When we rely upon Him in faith, He answers our prayers. Secondly, this instruction is not for the perfect or even just those who keep all of Father’s commandments. He promises blessings for those who “seek so to do.” If we are trying, sincerely, He will see our efforts and will more than match them. It also helps if we are earnestly seeking the best gifts.
In a commercialized culture, “best” often refers to the most for the least. It is more and more of what I want. It may include good deals, bargains, and sales. On the other hand, it may be a long list of material things on our grown-up Christmas lists that typically I can only dream of because my wallet always falls short. But these things are not always best for us. Even if we receive them, they may not be gifts.
Yesterday, my oldest son and I were talking about one of his recent needs that he can’t afford at the moment. I thought his need was valid but perhaps bordered on the threshold of wants. Until he could afford the item he wanted, I suggested that he learn to make do. Then I shared a principle that has been very effective in my life.
Many times I find that I have a need for something that I can’t afford. I follow the instruction to pray about it and I tell Father what I need. I then determine in my heart that I will be content with what I have received, and what I may receive. Then I let it go. It’s not that I forget about my need. I still work towards it, but I try not to set my heart on it. When I can demonstrate to Father that I care more about Him than I do the things of this world, He usually gives me what I want anyway. It may not be immediately, but I often find that it is soon. This has worked repeatedly for me, time and time again, and I know that God hears and answers prayers. I have had too many prayers that have been answered to ever doubt again.
So what are the best gifts? If we are to seek them earnestly, then we should first consider what they are and why they are given. Here are a few thoughts.
The Gift of the Holy Ghost
Wilford Woodruff, the fourth president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints taught that the gift of the Holy Ghost is the greatest gift that can be given to man in mortality. He said, “there is no greater gift, there is no greater blessing, there is no greater testimony given to any man on earth.” (Deseret Weekly, April 6, 1889, 451.) Why is this gift so great? Because the Holy Ghost is a member of the Godhead, or Trinity if you will. To feel His influence and follow on a daily basis is to walk with God. If you have ever wanted help to do something hard, what better help could you ask for than to hold His hand through a difficult trial, knowing that He will lead you safely through it. This is a gift that is received through confirmation after an individual has been baptized as described in the scriptures. The gift is operable anytime we are in need and seek to keep Father’s commandments. Anyone who seeks this gift can have it. Once we have been given the gift, others around us can feel that gift through us. We can share this gift and inspire others to seek the gift, too. This gift has the sustaining power to see all of Father’s children safely home.
The Gift of Eternal Life
In a revelation given through Joseph Smith the Prophet to David Whitmer, the Lord revealed, “Therefore, if you will ask of me you shall receive; if you will knock it shall be opened unto you. Seek to bring forth and establish my Zion. Keep my commandments in all things. And if you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God.” (D&C 14:5-7)
The gift of eternal life is the greatest gift possible because it is the gift that allows us to become like our Father. It is the gift that binds us to our Savior. With this gift, we are promised an inheritance of all that the Father hath. This means He will share His knowledge, His power, His wisdom, His glory, His kingdom, and worlds and eternities without end. Suffice it to say that we cannot comprehend what this really includes. But we know that He is willing to give us everything, holding nothing back, when we are willing to follow Him and keep His commandments.
The Gift of Charity
Mormon, a prophet in ancient America taught about another important gift, even the gift of charity. He said, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail— But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.” If we seek for charity, which is the pure love of Christ, we cannot fail.
We are further instructed how to receive this gift which is the greatest of all. Mormon continues, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; … that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure.” (Moroni 7:46-48)
The Gift of the Fruit of the Tree of Life
In a vision of the Tree of Life, the prophet, Lehi, saw a powerful symbol that can help each of us return to our heavenly home. The tree, which was a representation of ‘the love of God, which sheddeth itself abroad in the hearts of the children of men” is most desirable above all things. (1 Nephi 11:22) After eating some of the fruit, Lehi wanted to share with his family. He knew that the fruit was desirable to make one truly happy. He said, “it was most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted. Yea, and I beheld that the fruit thereof was white, to exceed all the whiteness that I had ever seen. And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy....” (1 Nephi 8:10-12) There is only one way to the fruit. It is a strait and narrow path that is marked with a rod of iron. As we follow the word of God, He will lead us in that path until we can taste the fruit for ourselves.
Love is the Gift of God Freely Given
A close examination of these last three gifts points out an interesting similarity. They are each the greatest, or the most desirable. Exaltation is the greatest gift. Charity is the greatest of all. The fruit of the tree of life is most desirable. If they are not all exaggerations, then perhaps they all refer to the greatest gift.
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13) Jesus was born into this world so that He could save us. He gave His life so that He might save us. Everything He has done has been for our salvation and exaltation. Salvation comes freely to all, making possible the resurrection. Exaltation can only come when we claim the gift that He so freely offers us.
The tree of life in Lehi’s vision represents the love of God, or the love of Christ. They are the same. Charity is the love of God, or the pure love of Christ. The fruit of which Lehi tasted and found to be more desirable than anything else. When we bear fruits of faith and repentance, we are led to the fruit of the tree of life, of eternal life. Each of these gifts are one and the same. God loves His children and wants them to be happy. He allows them to choose, to act and not be acted upon. The gift has been extended. It is up to us to choose – to reach toward Him to receive the gift or not.
The Gift of Agency Returned
Occasionally you may joke about a gift that you plan to return to the store because it didn’t fit or it wasn’t quite what you wanted. In a different sense, and for entirely opposite reasons, there is a gift that I think is worth returning, and we shouldn’t delay or wait until the day after Christmas to do it.
Like the recycled gifts of my youngest but well intended children, there is so very little that we can give to Father that is not already His. We have but a broken heart and a contrite spirit to offer. The apostle, Elder Neal A. Maxwell said, “as you submit your wills to God, you are giving Him the only thing you can actually give Him that is really yours to give. Don’t wait too long to find the altar or to begin to place the gift of your wills upon it! No need to wait for a receipt; the Lord has His own special ways of acknowledging.” (Ensign, May 2004, 44)
The gift of agency from Father to His children is the one thing that can give Him glory – because out of choice, we choose to become like Him. He allows us the freedom to choose for ourselves what we will do. He can’t force us. But when we submit to Him, and yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit by putting Him first, we demonstrate the amount of love we have for Him, be it great or small. Through our actions our gift is expressed. Through our love and agency returned, we give Him eternal glory.
I feel very blessed to have wonderful family and friends. This past year has been a real gift to me and I am changed for the better. I have never felt so much love and charity in all my life. The pure love of Christ is truly perfect love, and it is wonderful.
Christmas is a wonderful season of the year. It is not just a day. Christmas is an attitude and an opportunity. As we focus on the spirit of Christmas – the Spirit of the Lord – Father will grant unto us the gifts of the spirit that will lead us to the greatest gift of all. This is His gift. This is His desire, that we receive His gift by receiving Him into our hearts. As we do, we may feel Him say, “I love you,” with perfect clarity. May we all seek the love of God this Christmas season. May we ask for it, feel it, and then share it again and again.
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