Keeping the Garden

Daily I walk
Through elder trees and newer foliage
On familiar paths that change.
Canopies of leaves extend and reach
To cover the growth that sometimes frightens.
The orchard’s fullest depth holds a mystery.
Its many rooms remain a wonder.
The Garden I keep for another
Has fruit both wild and tame.
Each tree bears fruit in its own season,
Save two.
That place in the Garden is different,
And the two trees unique.

Since its planting,
The first never ceases to furnish fruit.
It never stops bearing,
Not for a moment.
The tree has one eternal round
Of giving two gifts –
Fruit which is ripe, and that which is rotten.
Upon first picking,
The tree’s forbidden flavor
Became common knowledge.
The delicious fruit has been greatly desired
By all who have tasted
For many seasons since.

At first harvest,
The second likewise experienced a change.
In place of always providing
This tree is continually ripening.
Closer and closer, the fruit, white and pure,
Nigh to ready,
Seems just out of reach.
Whether by knowledge,
Passed on in story,
Or due to lack of availability,
The fruit of the tree,
So full of life,
Is declared most desirable above all.

Between the two trees
An empty spot lingered;
Ground most fertile, and peculiar, perhaps.
If these others should bear
So very uniquely,
I wondered,
What could happen, if only by chance,
That I experiment with a third?
Desire worked in me.
My thoughts made room for hope.
Carefully placed, I set a small seed,
Which I thought
to be mustard.

Presumption took hold.
I qualmed and I doubted.
This Garden, not mine, was mine but to tend.
Still I questioned
If my small effort, insignificant at best,
Could possibly anger the one for whom
This Garden I kept.
With desire to equal both neighboring trees,
I settled, and decided
To watch and to wait.
I nourished, and tended, and kept.
And then I was angered.
What I saw was not what I thought.

Two trees stood,
Each flanking my spot.
They were majestic and strong,
Ideal for the ground
So fertile and willing.
But mine,
Twisted and gnarled, not slender or strait,
Had come from the dust,
Much smaller, and weaker.
I was less hopeful.
Perhaps it wasn’t the Garden soil after all.
The tree seemed disappointing,
My efforts vain.

Were it not for the notice
I gave to the leaves,
Which seemed to resemble the very first tree,
I should not have discovered
The fruit, a single olive,
Matching in whiteness and brilliance
The color of the ever ripening fruit.
There between trees, a third form was growing,
Finding strength from the soil
And the other two trees.
It was becoming and resembled
Another mount, another garden,
Covered in trees.


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Remembering Mother Eve

I once made the mistake of using an incorrect word while trying to pay a friend a compliment. After being given some delicious fudge as a present, I told my friend that she was infamous for her fudge rather than famous. Sigh. Yes, it was embarrassing. As soon as the words had crossed my lips, I immediately knew I wasn’t going to get out of that situation easily. I had really good intentions, but the compliment never arrived. Unfortunately, every time I think about the fudge she and her husband made for me, I also think about my faux pas. The two seem inseparable. A really good thing was tainted by my error.

Similar to my experience, I often wonder how well the world receives the gift that was given to us by our Mother Eve, because of her transgression. After Adam and Eve were commanded not to eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, Lucifer beguiled our mother and she “saw that the tree was good for food, and that it became pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make her wise….” Based on what she knew at the time, “she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and also gave unto her husband with her, and he did eat.” (Moses 4:12)

Immediately following their meal, the eyes of Adam and Eve were opened. Not only did they realize that they had been naked, they knew they had not responded to God’s warning and they hid out of fear. I find it interesting that they tried to hide the nakedness of their skin as well as the openness of their disobedience. But that is another subject, entirely. They found inadequate cover for both and then the Lord provided a better solution. Once they were prepared, they were driven out from the garden.

It may be too easy to judge our first parents based on appearances. Adam and Eve were disobedient, but they were not fully accountable without a prior knowledge and understanding of good and evil. They transgressed, yes, but they did not sin. However, their choice to eat the fruit introduced the potential for sin into the world and made it possible for them and their children to be tested. Both Adam and Eve discovered the effects of their decisions and suffered for them. And yet, while there was a cost to be paid, both were glad for their choice afterward. Eve said, “Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.” (Moses 5:11) While she did not possess knowledge before, she recognized afterward that her choice, though it would come with a cost, would be worth it.

In Prince Caspian, of the Chronicles of Narnia, C. S. Lewis wrote about this peculiar dichotomy. Near the end of the story, Aslan the Lion tells Prince Caspian of his less than reputable ancestral line. Prince Caspian then wishes that his lineage were less tainted. Aslan replies to Caspian, "You come of the Lord Adam and the Lady Eve…. And that is both honor enough to erect the head of the poorest beggar, and shame enough to bow the shoulders of the greatest emperor on earth. Be content." Disobedience may not be honorable, but good should not be discredited due to a lack of perfection.

As I have thought about Adam and Eve’s decision that brought both sin and happiness into the world, I have discovered some beautiful lessons that are worth honoring and not forgetting.

Fidelity in Marriage
While Adam and Eve lived in the garden, God commanded that they stay together and that Eve remain with her husband. (Moses 4:18) The same applies to Adam. While there weren’t a lot of other options in the garden, other than to not be close, their faithfulness to each other is largely the reason that Adam was persuaded to eat of the fruit. After leaving the garden, nothing else had preeminence for Adam and Eve, except for God. If couples struggling with marital issues today would remember the counsel given by God, “Therefore shall a man … cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh,” (Moses 3:24) and “thy desire shall be to thy husband,” (Moses 4:22) many marriages could be saved. It is when we turn our hearts away that we are in the most danger.

Raising Families
God has a great love for mothers. Of all the titles he could have chosen for Eve, mother was the most important. “And Adam called his wife’s name Eve, because she was the mother of all living; for thus have I, the Lord God, called the first of all women, which are many.” (Moses 4:26) Adam called his wife Eve, but Moses makes it clear that the title, “mother of all living,” originated with God. Because of her choice, God also told Eve,” I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception.” (Moses 4:22) While bearing children would not be easy, and raising them would be difficult, Eve recognized that we are meant to have joy, and so much of that joy comes from having children, teaching them the ways of the Lord, and enjoying with them the blessings that come from obedient living.

Seeking Help through Prayer
“And Adam and Eve, his wife, ceased not to call upon God.” (Moses 5:16) Raising a family is a lifelong effort with many unknown variables that can influence our happiness. With so much out of our control or experience, we would be wise to call upon God for help to raise His children. When we lack wisdom, He is willing to give us help liberally if we ask in faith. (James 1:5) After they were driven from the garden, Adam and Eve began to call “upon the name of the Lord, and they heard the voice of the Lord from the way toward the Garden of Eden, speaking unto them, and they saw him not; for they were shut out from his presence.” (Moses 5:4)

Again, it is easy to judge the tone of this verse by its conclusion, as though it were a bad thing. Remembering that the decision of all of us in the grand council in heaven was to leave Father’s presence so that we could be tested, we should not condemn Adam or Eve for their choice. They chose to do what we all chose to do, which is to learn by being tested. When we have faith, and repent of our sins, it is as though we never sinned.

The important lesson for me is that Adam and Eve continued to listen to the voice of the Lord God, even when they could not see him. They prayed. He answered. Praying with faith is important if we seek the Lord’s help. However, following the answers He gives us to our prayers is just as important. Adam and Eve set a clear example for us to follow.

Teaching from the Scriptures and by the Holy Ghost
After the Holy Ghost came upon Adam and Eve, they “blessed the name of God, and they made all things known unto their sons and daughters. (Moses 5:12) “And thus the Gospel began to be preached, from the beginning, being declared by holy angels sent forth from the presence of God, and by his own voice, and by the gift of the Holy Ghost.” (Moses 5:58) “and a book of remembrance was kept, in the which was recorded, in the language of Adam, for it was given unto as many as called upon God to write by the spirit of inspiration; and by them their children were taught….” (Moses 6:5)

What a beautiful thing to realize that as many of Adam and Eve’s children who chose to pray to God were given answers that were worth remembering and recording. All they had to do was ask. They then passed on what they had learned to their children.

Each of us has the opportunity to be taught directly by the Holy Ghost. Those who are confirmed after baptism are invited and directed to receive the Holy Ghost. He is ready to teach us as long as we are ready to listen and follow.

Becoming Like God as We Choose to Follow Him
Knowing that we, each of God’s children, would fall to temptation and the conditions of mortality, our Father provided a Savior, even Jesus Christ, who would redeem us from the fall. The prophet Lehi taught that this redemption makes us free. Because we are not bound to the conditions of death that were introduced by eating the forbidden fruit, we are free to choose the pathway of our future.

Lehi taught, “Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself. And now… I would that ye should look to the great Mediator, and hearken unto his great commandments; and be faithful unto his words, and choose eternal life, according to the will of his Holy Spirit….” (2 Nephi 2:27-28)

I may wonder at why things happened they way they did, or if there could have been another way. Then I content myself to remember that “all things have been done in the wisdom of him who knoweth all things. Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.” (2 Nephi 2:24-25)

The greatest happiness in our lives comes when we choose to be like God. We choose to become like Him when we choose good over evil. No matter how small the decision, each choice will carry us closer to or further from God. What a gift this choice is! Every day we, like our mother Eve, are able to experience the lessons God has prepared for us, all because she wanted to be like Him, knowing good from evil. Knowing is not enough, but having faith is. If I ever get to meet mother Eve on the other side of the veil, I am hoping to save a special heartfelt compliment for her. I am so grateful that she made a choice that make all of my choices possible. Did she ever regret her decision? No, and neither do I.


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Leaving the Garden of Eden

Four years ago I made the mistake of missing a return airplane flight on President’s Day weekend. I was not aware of how busy that particular Friday was for flyers and thought I might be able to arrange another departure. I was wrong. Worse yet, I disappointed my wife. My missed departure equated to a lost opportunity for a Friday night date we had been planning for a while. Saddened, after discovering that all outgoing flights were not only sold out but were overbooked, I had to figure out what I would do for accommodations. I went back to the car rental where I had just returned my car only to pick up another. My next task was to find a hotel room for the weekend. Admittedly, my decisions left me with circumstances I had not expected.

While Independence, Missouri, is a cold place to be in February, it is very different in the summer. In my effort to make the best of an extended business trip, I revisited memories of previous trips – times when leaves on trees were full and green rather than bleakly missing. I recalled driving through that part of the country, appreciating its recent and ancient history. In my memory, I appreciated the beauty of what I had known before. What I saw in front of me on that trip was a completely different context.

It was a sad irony that my attempt to leave Independence left me trapped and stranded from the home I wished to return to. Another small irony was that I was trying to leave by choice when, not quite two hundred years ago, many of my ancestors who had lived in that same area were forced to abandon their homes and lands, and leave against their will. Almost overnight, they had no accommodations and were at the mercy of other settlers who took them in and gave them a place to stay. They, too, left in the cold of winter, but they did not have rental cars or hotel rooms to comfort them. I was attempting to get home. They had to leave theirs.

Not far from this area is a place called Adam-ondi-Ahman, a name my ancestors referred to as the land where Adam dwelt. The valley of Adam-ondi-Ahman is now used for crops and is a quite a fertile area. Because of its namesake, I have wondered how fertile it might have been in comparison to the Garden of Eden. What were conditions really like there? What was summer like? How severe was winter when Adam and Eve were driven out? To what home did they then go?

The ancient account of leaving the fertile garden was partly out of choice, and partly by requirement. Yes, Adam and Eve were driven from the Garden of Eden by God, but only after having made the choice that triggered the consequence. First, they were warned of what would happen should they choose to eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Then they chose.

God commanded Adam, “Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it, nevertheless, thou mayest choose for thyself, for it is given unto thee; but, remember that I forbid it, for in the day thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.” (Moses 3:16-17)

I wonder if we received similar instruction in the grand council in heaven before coming to this earth. When the plan of our Father in heaven was presented, were we not also warned of what would happen should we choose to accept His plan, requiring us to gain knowledge and choose between good and evil? Did we not accept the conditions of death as part of mortality? How much did we know? We didn’t know what death was like because we hadn’t experienced it. We didn’t know how temptations would affect a mortal body, either. Yet we knew enough to follow Jehovah and reject Lucifer during the war in heaven. We knew enough to choose sides and pick between good and evil.

In a sense, choosing to leave the premortal world was no different than choosing to leave the Garden of Eden. Whether our choice or the choice of Adam and Eve, it was a choice to leave the presence of God so that we could be tested. The weight of this choice can only be fully understood when we acknowledge what was being left behind. We chose to leave our home in heaven, to become strangers in a strange land. Adam and Eve chose to accept the consequences of death that they might become as gods knowing good and evil.

After the fall, the Holy Ghost fell upon Adam and he said, “Blessed be the name of God, for because of my transgression my eyes are opened, and in this life I shall have joy, and again in the flesh I shall see God.” Eve having heard this was glad and said, “Were it not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.” (Moses 5:10-11)

These verses of scripture hold an interesting contradiction. Adam and Eve were warned by God what would happen if they ate the forbidden fruit. Yet after their transgression, the Holy Ghost comes as a reward and comforts them. Adam acknowledges that he will have joy that he could not have experienced otherwise. Eve expresses her hope for eternal life through obedience. Both were glad for their decision. When Adam and Eve chose death, they also chose the opportunity to have eternal life. While they didn’t know this until after they had eaten the forbidden fruit, they were persuaded by the serpent to become like God. While it was his intent to deceive Adam and Eve, it was the intent of God to save them. The apparent contradiction between God’s warning and the reaction of Adam and Eve after their fall represents a paradox more than conflicting circumstances.

A choice to leave the Garden is a choice to accept opposition. It is also a choice to let go of something we know in exchange for something better. The greater reward comes with a cost. As we choose to meet opposition, and choose between good and evil, we become something better. We become converted, and we become worthy. By choice, we become like God.

God cursed the ground for Adam and Eve’s sake, not as a punishment but that they might have joy. The path is sweat and sorrow, thorns and thistles, yet our reward is heaven and eternal life. Seeing through the opposition – not only of good and evil, but between pleasure and sorrow, weakness and strength – requires us to have faith, and the more the better. To live in the world but not of it challenges us to become strong in adversity. The desire for happiness when we suffer from loss invites us to seek help from a loving Father who loves to care for His children. Striving to overcome our weaknesses in the hope of finding strength demands all the faith we can provide. The beauty of this offering is that our faith is then matched, increased, and returned in greater abundance. Faith in God never fails, but turns to charity as we feel His love and as our love for Him grows in our hearts. Thus the pathway is not punishment but perfection.

I believe that repeatedly each of us is required to leave our own intermittent Gardens of Eden. It takes faith to face a situation that will require a willing sacrifice, believing that the result will be greater. It requires our trust in God that His way is always better. When we are willing to let go of the things we know, we have nothing to trust in but the things we do not know but hope to believe. This is Father’s purpose. He invites us, through faith on His Only Begotten Son, to believe though we cannot see, as we follow the enticings of His Holy Spirit. This leap of faith requires us to leave Eden to travel through our own wilderness, our destination being our heavenly home. This test proves to ourselves just how valuable the heavenly gift means to us. More importantly, it demonstrates the strength of our love for God.

Isaiah the prophet taught that the Lord will comfort His people. When we look to Abraham and Sarah, like Adam and Eve, and we keep the covenants God made with them, he will give us the same blessings. Isaiah said, “Hearken to me, ye that follow after righteousness, ye that seek the Lord: look unto the rock whence ye are hewn, and to the hole of the pit whence ye are digged. Look unto Abraham your father, and unto Sarah that bare you: for I called him alone, and blessed him, and increased him. For the Lord shall comfort Zion: he will comfort all her waste places; and he will make her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the Lord; joy and gladness shall be found therein, thanksgiving, and the voice of melody.” (Isaiah 51:1-3)

Adam and Eve left the garden to face death and brought children into the world. Abraham left his garden as he ascended the Mount in Moriah to offer his son, Isaac. He found comfort in the promises of the Lord. The early pioneers who left Missouri faced the martyrdom of Carthage and the despair of Nauvoo, but found their Zion where the desert was made a garden. Each of us may find comfort in our places of despair when we face our wilderness with faith. The first step is to leave the comfort of our home in Eden in the hope of arriving at a better place.

The prophet Mormon taught us, “if ye will lay hold upon every good thing, and condemn it not, ye certainly will be a child of Christ. And now, my brethren, how is it possible that ye can lay hold upon every good thing? And now I come to that faith, of which I said I would speak; and I will tell you the way whereby ye may lay hold on every good thing.” (Moroni 7:19-21)

As we hear the words of Christ and exercise faith in Him, we increase our ability to lay hold upon every good thing. But first we must let go of our fears, our pride, and our vanity. If we fail to do so, these things possess our hearts and leave no room for faith. When we release our grasp on the things that we treasure in our hearts, trusting that God is always right, then will our deserts be turned into gardens, and joy and gladness will fill our hearts. This is the purpose of our existence, that we might have joy through the Lord.

Repeatedly this last year, I have felt as though I have had promptings to give up things that were very valuable to me. I have been asked to give up my Eden. Each time I have left the comfort and security of the garden – each time I was willing to submit to and yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit and make an offering of faith to the Lord – He has rewarded me like Abraham, accepting my willingness and allowing me to keep my treasure. Whether our trials are lengthy or temporary, the anguish of our departure will always be softened by faith. Like a missed plane flight, some things are only temporary. Blessings may be delayed like an inconvenient layover, but the Lord always keeps His promises, and He always rewards faith. I may have more gardens to leave before I am finished, but I become less and less afraid knowing that God’s way is always better, and is often inclusive.


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Weak and Worthy of Perfection

I sat anxiously across from the owner of the company. He was positioned behind the desk in his office, accompanied with books and files and drawings. His appearance was very professional. I was intimidated. The principal owner had lots of experience while I had nothing but my willingness to offer; no experience, no skill or ability. I was just eager. My eyes were on him, and his eyes were on my résumé.

After perusing my small offering of ability, the owner asked me a number of questions. I don’t recall any of them now. I only remember the urgent need to find a job. My fiancé had recently accepted my proposal of marriage, but I had very little to offer her, only my willingness. Similar to the lyrics by Paul Simon, “I was as empty as a pocket with [everything] to lose.” My position was pretty weak. Fortunately, Liz had a lot of faith in me, and the interview was just enough.

The owner hired me. Deep sigh of relief. He took my weak position and limited ability, and he gave me a chance. It was an opportunity to show how I would perform for a short period of time. He made it clear that I would be on probation to see if the arrangement would be a good fit. I was grateful but still nervous. So much depended on landing and keeping my first real job. Everything hinged on my willingness to follow directions.

Some of my first assignments were pretty basic. I was the go-to person for tasks that didn’t require any experience. These tasks included sweeping the backroom, running deposits to the bank, and picking up lint off the floor. I was asked to keep the fax machine loaded with paper. I had heard of fax machines, but didn’t have a clue about how to use one, let alone keep it stocked. There were a few frustrating moments that required others to have patience with me as they taught me how to do small tasks. My job description matched my ability, but at least it was a start.

I felt very tenuous the next couple of months as I performed my duties, always wondering where I stood with my employer. Would he keep me? Was he satisfied? Did I meet his expectations? When he didn’t talk to me, did that mean that he was unhappy with me? I went home every night with some worry that I might be looking for another job soon. Again, fortunately for me, Liz and my employer had faith in my ability, and it was just enough.

As I started my follow-up interview, I was almost certain my employer was unhappy with my performance. I doubted myself and I let fear govern my thoughts. I contemplated the worst case scenarios and what I would do next. Contrary to my fears, the principal of the company reviewed my progress with me and thanked me for my work. He then asked me to continue with the firm. In an instant, my confidence was renewed and hope was restored. I could hardly wait to tell my fiancé that things were going to work out. So much of my attitude depended on that single validation.

Now that I, myself, am a principal in an architecture and planning firm, it is wonderful and gratifying to see how far I have come. I started at the bottom, and I continue to grow. There are many areas of experience I wish to develop, but they will take time, patience, and practice. While I am confident in my abilities to provide professional services, I am also glad I do not see a ceiling to my growth. There is plenty of room.

My current successes sometimes block out the memories of inadequacy I once felt, but they do not negate how real they were. I was quite worried. My fears were unfounded and without validation from my employer, but they were constant until I had some assurance. This memory reminds me of another experience I frequently have with inadequacy. However, my chair has moved to the other side of the desk.

On a regular basis, my responsibility in the church I attend allows me to meet with individuals who are preparing to worship in a Holy Temple. Part of their preparation involves an interview in which I ask them some questions about their worthiness to enter the Temple. The questions are simple and focus on their faith and ability to live a life patterned after the Savior Jesus Christ. The last question tends to generate some feelings of inadequacy in many instances, yet it is very important. “Do you consider yourself worthy to enter the Lord’s house and participate in temple ordinances?” Most of the questions I ask have short and confident answers. This last question often generates some discussion.

What does it mean to be worthy? Worthiness is not to be confused with perfection or holiness. Instead, worthiness represents adequate merit, worth, or value. It does not imply “arriving at the top.” The word should suggest our pursuit of that goal, and not the destination. The key word for me is “adequate,” meaning just enough. If I am required to have adequate faith, I do not need to have perfect faith. In fact, faith the size of a grain of mustard seed is adequate as long as my actions are “just enough.” I will still pursue this endeavor of increasing my faith, but it is not the measure of my worthiness.

Feelings of worthiness are often hampered by feelings of inadequacy. When we feel deficient or fall short of someone else’s expectations, we often feel that we lack worth or validity. We doubt ourselves without reassurance and a measure of validation. When we begin to lose confidence and question our worth, it is much easier to focus on our weaknesses. These are the moments where I feel that “weak” and “worthy” are at opposing sides of the desk, one scrutinizing and the other being scrutinized. However, I do not feel that this is always necessary.

Weaknesses, though not fun to admit to or deal with, can be a great blessing to the eager disciple of the Savior Jesus Christ. They become a gift when we see them for what they are. Yet again we find another application of our faith. I do not believe it is possible to have this clear of vision without faith in the only person who ever lived a perfect life in mortality. Believing in Jesus is believing that what He said is true, and that the words of His servants are also true.

Frustrated with his own ability to write, the prophet Moroni pled with the Lord over his weaknesses. The Lord responded, “if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27)

I can’t say that I like to admit that my weaknesses are a gift from God. To do so admits a responsibility and a stewardship. It is much easier to pray that our weaknesses are removed than to pray for strength to deal with them and master them. Once I begin to see with an eye of faith, however, the personal growth I have been hoping for is met with greater success. These accomplishments are items that are good to include on a spiritual résumé.

The Apostle Paul, in his second letter to church members in Corinth, described how the Lord had given him “a thorn in the flesh” to keep him humble. Three times Paul asked the Lord to remove this trial. The Lord’s response was, “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Paul then states, “Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. …for when I am weak, then am I strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10)

It wasn’t until after Paul heard the Lord’s explanation that he took pleasure in trials and afflictions. I don’t know that the experience became any more pleasurable than before, but Paul had faith that the Lord would lead him and make him stronger. I think some of the strength that I admire in Paul, is not just his ability to endure trials, but in his choice to submit willingly. The beauty of what the Lord told Moroni is that He will supply us with this strength when we humble ourselves before Him and have faith in him. Thus, the hardest part to admitting our weaknesses is not to find strength, but in deciding to have faith. Once we do, the Lord will provide the grace, the strength, and the witness that we desire. But it is only after we turn to Him and allow our faith to be tested.

Moroni further compares this type of faith with that of the brother of Jared’s. It is the ability to see with an “eye of faith,” or to receive a witness and see the things that we first believed. (Ether 12:19) This is another key to rending the veil of unbelief, to believe without seeing. When we begin to see our weaknesses for what they are, as gifts from God, we are entitled to His promise, “And because thou hast seen thy weakness thou shalt be made strong, even unto the sitting down in the place which I have prepared in the mansions of my Father.” (Ether 12:37) It isn’t just seeing our weakness, but seeing it with an eye of faith that merits the promise.

If we wish to have the faith of the brother of Jared, the conversion of Peter, and the strength of Paul, it all starts with the faith to become. Not only do we become converted, we become worthy. It is our faith the Lord wants, stored up in our hearts. If we are willing to offer this gift, it is enough. It is adequate. Then His grace will cover our debts, our sins, and our transgressions. Both Paul and Moroni stated that His grace is “sufficient” to save us when we have faith. I find it interesting that the word sufficient also means enough.

It is one thing to worry about being worthy to enter the Lord’s house and worship Him in the Holy Temple. It is another to wonder if I am worthy to enter the presence of God and live with Him again in heaven. I do not believe it insignificant that the Holy Temple is the house of God, or the place where God dwells. Whether it is His dwelling here on earth or our home in heaven to which we hope to return, we should be diligent in doing enough to be worthy of both. This would suggest that a worthiness to enter the Lord’s house would equate to worthiness to return to His presence. I believe this to be true with one additional validation – the key to truly being worthy.

The Lord revealed to Joseph Smith that, “It is impossible for man to be saved in ignorance.” (Doctrine & Covenants 131:6) It is God’s will that we know where we stand before Him. To this end He gives His children the Gift of the Holy Ghost. As the Lord taught Adam, “by the Spirit ye are justified….” (Moses 6:60) The Holy Ghost will not only confirm the validity of truth, He will confirm to us that what we are doing is either right or wrong. He will bear witness to our spirits and let us know when our path is pleasing to God. In this way, when we feel the presence and influence of the Holy Spirit near to us, we may with confidence know that our will is aligned with God’s.

Rather than feeling inadequate or worried about whether we are worthy to obtain the highest degree of heaven, we can ask the Lord where we stand and receive His own validation. In a revelation on the Holy Priesthood, the Lord further taught Joseph Smith an important key. He said, “Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the dews from heaven.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:45)

With charity, the pure love of Christ, and virtue, which is a conformity to righteous principles, we can stand confident in the presence of God. This confidence isn’t because we become anything of ourselves, but because we are doing more and more of what God has asked us to do. The more we become obedient to God and focus outward on His children, the more confidence we can obtain. He is the source of true confidence. When we do what He has taught, there is no need to fear. When we put our trust in Him, He will see us through our trials. And then, “The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:46)

As we consider the commandment of the Savior to “be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect,” we are met with a paradox – we are to be humble but confident, weak and yet strong. The paradox becomes clearer when we remember how Father wants us to grow. He wants us to turn to Him and rely on Him for strength.

Without a focus on God and the assurance from the Holy Spirit that we are making good choices, worthiness could be measured by simply marking a checklist. It would then be too easy to be like others the Lord has warned against. “They draw near to me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me, they teach for doctrines the commandments of men, having a form of godliness, but they deny the power thereof.” (Joseph Smith–History 1:19)

When we put our trust in the Lord with an eye of faith, we do not have to be afraid of being weak. He will make us strong. When we become strong as we are doing only that which He has asked us to do, we need not fear being too confident, not if our confidence comes from Him. When we acknowledge that all powers, gifts, and blessings come from God, He will give us more which in turn will eliminate all our feelings of inadequacy. When we are willing to submit to His will, one choice at a time, it is just enough to get us moving in the right direction.

Feeling inadequate is an experience I would rather do without. Whether it is interviewing for a job, preparing to go to the temple, or preparing to go to our heavenly home, having the right assurance makes all the difference.

I felt a lot of anxiety over my first job. I wanted to know if my work was acceptable. I hoped I was going in the right direction. Most of all, I wanted to know that I was going to make it. Now, more than wanting to keep a job, I want to be faithful in keeping the Holy Spirit as my constant companion. So much of eternity depends on keeping our second estate here on earth. Everything hinges on our willingness to follow directions during our mortal probation.

Perfection is a lofty goal, but it can be obtained, at least eventually. I don’t have to feel inadequate because I am not there yet. I can still be worthy of God’s promised blessings. With an eye of faith, and an ability to see our weaknesses for what they are, we can be worthy without being perfect. In this way, we become worthy of perfection. We do this in spite of our weaknesses, and often with them. God is willing to take our weak position and limited ability and give us a chance to work for Him in His kingdom. When He validates our worthiness by the presence of His Holy Spirit, we have nothing to fear.


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Conversion is Becoming

The aroma of fresh, golden crusted bread baking in the oven is temptation enough for me to stop whatever I am doing and remember how much I enjoy a good slice, or two, or even three. Mmmmm. I love my wife’s recipe. Her bread is very satisfying and slightly addicting unless you have a healthy amount of self restraint. Her last batch of four loaves was gone within hours, thanks to my charming children. I would do well to hide a loaf before I am left with naught but a temptation to remember.

Liz has been perfecting her white bread technique for many years. From her I have learned that good flavor starts with good flour. Yet there are other ingredients besides that make an enormous difference in how good the bread will turn out. Salt and oil each play their part in adding the right flavor. Yeast lifts and gives rise to the bread. Lethicin adds elasticity. Vital wheat gluten strengthens the dough, adds protein, and increases shelf life. Dough conditioner softens the texture and enhances flavor. With the correct knowledge and ability, a baker can take the necessary ingredients and convert them into a beautiful loaf of bread. Fortunately, Liz understands the art and science of bread making well enough to create something wonderful in nearly every instance. One exception has little to do with the recipe.

There are only a few things that I have a hard time eating, and bread that is slightly doughy is one of them. Every once in a while a batch of bread will turn out this way. It smells good, it looks good, and it has all the right ingredients. However, when we cut into the loaf, the slice is a little doughier than it should be. We have discovered that this usually happens when we are in a hurry, and the dough isn’t given sufficient time to rise before baking. Without proper leavening, the bread may be hard to swallow.

Similar to bread making, leavening is an important process in our eternal progression. We need outside help to overcome the conditions of mortality. We need a lift up. Without the help of God, we could not overcome the bonds of sin and death. However, by the grace of God we may be converted into something much, much better. Instead of becoming a loaf of bread, we are here to become like our Father in heaven. This transformation requires the right ingredients, the right process, and the right amount of time. As in the case of my least favorite bread, proper leavening makes all the difference in our conversion.

Ancient Israelites were familiar with bread that was both leavened and unleavened. These were used in their feasts, their customs, and their sacrifices. Jesus used the example of leaven, or yeast, as a comparison of how the kingdom of heaven can bless all of God’s children on earth. (Matthew 13:33) Conversely, he also warned his disciples “of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees,” speaking of their doctrine and teachings which were not correct. (Matthew 16:6-12) When we put our trust in the Lord’s will, He will lift us up with Him. Yet when we trust solely in our own strength, we may find ourselves lifted up in pride instead.

Regarding this process of conversion, the prophet Nephi quoted the Lord saying, “I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have. Cursed is he that putteth his trust in man, or maketh flesh his arm, or shall hearken unto the precepts of men, save their precepts shall be given by the power of the Holy Ghost.” (2 Nephi 28:30-31) Nephi points out that one of the most critical ingredients in our own recipe for conversion is the Holy Spirit. He will provide proper leavening in our lives to uplift and edify as we follow His promptings.

King Benjamin, an ancient American prophet, taught a beautiful sermon about the atonement of Jesus Christ and how we can become like Him. First he described our initial, natural state which, like the lump of unbaked dough, is not worthy of heaven unless we undergo a conversion process. He said, “For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord….” It is when we are willing to replace the bad leaven with good leaven that we become what the Lord intended us to become. (Mosiah 3:19)

The beauty of this doctrine is that we do not have to focus on all the things that we are not. We don’t have to know how to make a perfect loaf of bread. All we are required to do is listen as the Holy Ghost teaches what we should do. We merely have to submit our own will to the will of the Father. King Benjamin continues. As we yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, we become “as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” Simply by listening and following, we begin to change. It is in that moment that we become like God. This is the process of becoming. It is the process of conversion.

When my children can smell the bread baking in the oven, it is not uncommon for them to ask or wonder when it will be done. Similarly, it is not uncommon for me to ask myself how I am doing in my conversion process. “When will I be done? How is my conversion coming along?” My answers tend to vary depending on when I ask the question.

At certain times in my life, I may be feeling quite good about things. I feel the influence of the Holy Spirit and I feel like I am doing what I am supposed to. I feel justified. Then I learn a principle that changes my understanding and I realize I have further to go. While the realization is enlightening, I almost feel like I am taking a step backward when I learn something new. This is a funny paradox that is not as dubious as it sounds.

While our lives may be measured against a perfect standard, namely that of the Savior’s, we are only judged on the knowledge we have been given. Joseph Smith taught, “Men will be held accountable for the things which they have and not for the things they have not.” Consequently, a man or woman who lives up to the light and knowledge given them my have a clear conscience. Once that knowledge is increased, the person is required to live a higher standard. God will continue to increase their knowledge according to their faithfulness and ability to apply it. Thus conversion is not measured by knowledge but the willingness to follow it.

I wonder how the apostle Peter felt about his conversion just prior to Jesus Christ’s death. Jesus spoke to Peter and told him that Satan desired to have him and to sift the children of the kingdom as wheat. Then Jesus said, “But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.” (Luke 22:32) If Peter, the chief apostle, who had been with the Lord during His ministry, was not converted, then who would be? What did he lack? Peter’s response to Jesus was that he was ready to go with Him to prison and even death. It was then that Jesus told Peter that he would deny Him three times, and His words were fulfilled.

Without judging Peter, we can use his example to evaluate our own faithfulness. It is one thing to stand by the Savior when He is there to give us courage and strength. But what about the times when He is not? How do we fare in our trials when it appears that, like Peter, we are alone? What is the leaven that we choose to help us rise above the temptations of the adversary? With the proper ingredients, process, and time, we may become converted like Peter. It was after Jesus was resurrected and glorified that Peter more fully felt the gift and power of the Holy Ghost as was promised. (John 7:39; 14:26, 16:7) Not only did Peter feel it, he followed. As we live worthy of the gift and power of the Holy Ghost, and as we yield to His enticings, our hearts become sanctified and we likewise become converted.

Like Peter, we could ask when the Brother of Jared became converted. At what point did he have sufficient faith that he could rend the veil of unbelief and see the Lord Jesus Christ? The answer of that moment is less clear. However, what is clear is that his experience was slightly different than Peter’s. Peter was with Jesus when he ministered and performed miracles. He received his witness by the Holy Ghost after being with him. The brother of Jared believed before seeing Jesus Christ. His witness came after he was sanctified by the Holy Ghost. He became converted one prayer at a time. Each time the brother of Jared received instruction, he followed. And each time he followed, he was blessed. Neither Peter nor the brother of Jared relied upon their own strength. Their leaven was of God.

Remembering that conversion is not the same thing as being converted can be a great comfort. Conversion is a process. It is the process of becoming. Because of our natures, we all fall short of the example of Jesus Christ. His invitation to “be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect,” (3 Nephi 12:48) is not attainable in this life, but beginning the process of becoming perfect is. This would suggest that Father is more concerned with direction than perfection. If our hearts are turned towards Him, we should be content to take the time necessary to let that conversion take place, line upon line, grace for grace. As Nephi said, “for we know that it is by grace that we are saved after all we can do.” (2 Nephi 25:23) While we are not expected to run faster than we have strength, or be judged according to knowledge that we do not have, we should do all things within our power to follow the Holy Spirit.

So, back to the question, “Am I done yet?” Like the bread in the oven, we can measure our progress in becoming converted by checking results. With the loaf of bread, the greatest change occurs as the dough cooks thoroughly and the crust becomes hardened. With our own conversion, it is the heart that undergoes the greatest change, and the outer parts of our heart become softer, not harder. To be complete, the change must be just as thorough.

The prophet Alma described this change as a spiritual rebirth. He asked, “have ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts?” (Alma 5:14) By Alma’s definition, a change of heart is apparent when we become more like God, when we receive Him into our hearts and everything that we do. This occurs more thoroughly when we are ready and willing to give up the natural man – our natural desires that are in conflict with the will of God – and instead yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit. We trade the leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducees for the leaven of God.

As you look at your own heart and find that you aren’t done yet, don’t be discouraged. If you have the needed ingredients of a broken heart and a contrite spirit, and if you have begun the “process of becoming” by rising above the temptations of the world, then it is just a matter of time before the heat in the oven will convert the dough into bread. A steady and consistent course of becoming converted is more important than arriving at the destination.

Conversion is “becoming” in both meanings of the word. As we become more like Jesus Christ, our end result will be more desirable. By focusing on following the Holy Ghost, the other ingredients in our lives will take care of themselves. Life will have a better flavor. We will become more capable, and our hearts will be stronger. Everything about us will be enhanced because we will have received the Lord’s image in our countenances. As we choose to have a change of heart, one step at a time, the conversion of becoming will be very rewarding.


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Among the Clouds

Hail, precipice of solid rock!
From ground to clouds the sky you’ve climbed,
While lesser things the earth will walk,
In Babel’s shadow left to talk.

Adorned with clouds and hid from sight
Your tops are veiled with densest fog.
And yet, I’d face uncertain fright
If I but once could reach your height.

Among my fears, which is my test?
The mountain tall or clouded thought?
From which will I first seek some rest
When strength is gone and doubt expressed?

Dear Brother, you have gone before
With sixteen stones for glowing light.
I ask again, please, pray once more
That I, too, might have knowledge sure.

Consider mountain, rock, and stone,
With clouds and fog that veil the Light.
The obstacle that hides the throne
Is also that which makes Him known.

Just as the Lord without disguise
Stretched forth his hand and touched the stones,
The veil was taken from your eyes
And doubt gave way to parted skies.

When few with faith are thus endowed
Shall I with hope appraise my own
By mountains climbed, which veils enshroud,
Or my comfort among the clouds?

Hail, Brother! Thou that stands
Upon Mount Shelem, nigh with God,
With eighteen stones now in thy hands
To light the way to distant lands.

And so it is when you return,
You bring the height of mountains back
Deep in your heart where hope will yearn,
Then I with faith will start to learn.


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But Whom Say Ye That I Am?

During His ministry in Galilee, Jesus asked His Twelve Apostles two questions that distinguish a true disciple from a casual admirer. After feeding four thousand people with loaves and fishes, Jesus departed with his disciples by boat from Magdala on the west coast of the Sea of Galilee to Bethsaida, and then continued northward close to 30 miles on foot toward Caesarea Philippi. When they were alone, by the wayside, Jesus asked his disciples, “Whom do men say that I am?” There were many, including Herod, who believed that Jesus was John the Baptist, Elias, Jeremias, or one of the older prophets who had returned from the dead. Whether they believed in Jesus or not, it would have been hard to dispute the reputation that was spreading about His miracles.

Jesus then asked His disciples, “But whom say ye that I am?” Peter responded, “Thou art the Christ, the Son of the Living God.” Jesus said, “Blessed art thou, Simon Bar-jona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed it unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven.” It wasn’t because of the miracles that Peter believed. It was from the witness in his heart that only the Holy Ghost can deliver from the Father. Peter had obtained his knowledge from God through faith. (Matthew 16:13-20, Mark 8:27-30, Luke 9:18-22)

I don’t believe Jesus was concerned with miracles. It was the faith of His people that He wanted. Eating the loaves and fishes that He multiplied for them would satisfy them for a moment, but it wasn’t nearly enough to develop their faith. For that they had to take something else inside of them.

Just before his death, Jesus gathered with the Apostles to observe the Passover. There He instituted the sacrament by breaking bread and giving it to them in remembrance of His body. He then gave them wine, in remembrance of His blood. These emblems are a significant reminder, not only of the sacrifice that Jesus made for us in Gethsemane and at Golgotha, but also of the sacrifice that we should be willing to make for Him, that of a broken heart and a contrite spirit. (3 Nephi 9:20)

As we take the emblems of the flesh and blood of Jesus into our own bodies, we covenant to remember Him and witness that we are willing to do certain things. First, we witness that we are willing to take upon ourselves His name. As we repent and are redeemed from the fall through His sacrifice, we are spiritually reborn and we become His children. This is what Jesus taught the brother of Jared when He said that all who believe on His name should have eternal life, “and they shall become my sons and my daughters.” (Ether 3:14) As we partake of the sacrament, we also witness that we are willing to keep His commandments that we may always have His Spirit, even the Holy Ghost, to be with us. This affords us the same gift given to Peter, a witness that Jesus is the Christ, and not just a man who performed miracles.

Regarding this willingness, Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Twelve Apostles said, “It is significant that when we partake of the sacrament we do not witness that we take upon us the name of Jesus Christ. We witness that we are willing to do so. (See D&C 20:77) The fact that we only witness to our willingness suggests that something else must happen before we actually take that sacred name upon us in the most important sense.” (Ensign, May 1985) It isn’t just loaves and fishes that we must eat, nor is it merely the sacrament that we must take into our bodies. It is what we take into our hearts. It is the covenants we make with God that we must internalize. Until we do this, we cannot receive a witness like Peter’s. Instead of becoming true disciples, we remain casual admirers.

What then does it mean to have faith in Christ? What is the difference between being a casual admirer and a true disciple? The answers are tied together. It is in the moment that we move past being willing to follow Jesus and actually follow him that we become a disciple. It is then that we become eligible to receive our own witness from the Holy Ghost. Through our actions we demonstrate our faith. As we sacrifice our own hearts, our desires, our wants, and our will, we become like Him.

The pathway of faith may be examined in several steps, each of which is important. Because we all learn line upon line, grace for grace, we should not discount any of them. Rather we should acknowledge them and look for our next step in following the Savior. Jesus said, “I give unto you these sayings that you may understand and know how to worship, and know what you worship, that you may come unto the Father in my name, and in due time receive of his fulness. For if you keep my commandments you shall receive of his fulness, and be glorified in me as I am in the Father; therefore, I say unto you, you shall receive grace for grace.” (Doctrine & Covenants 93:19-20)

Believe that Jesus lived
Our first step of faith is to believe that Jesus actually lived. When we acknowledge that He was born in Bethlehem to Mary and Joseph, that He grew up in Nazareth, that He taught in Galilee, Perea, and Judea, we can turn to the accounts recorded in Holy Scripture to learn more.

During His life on earth, Jesus loved, healed, and ministered to the people. According to their faith He performed many miracles. Jesus taught the gospel and His Father’s plan to all who would listen. His exemplary life was flawless and without sin. He is the only person ever to live who has been perfectly obedient to the commandments of God.

Jesus said, “Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me. I am Jesus Christ; I came by the will of the Father, and I do his will.” (Doctrine & Covenants 19:23-24)

Believe that Jesus lived before His birth
Jesus was in the beginning with the Father. In the world of spirits, He was the firstborn of our Father’s children. In that place, Jesus offered to champion Father’s plan for our happiness. He was willing to be our Savior. In the war in heaven against Lucifer, He prevailed and gave the glory to God.

At the direction of Father, Jesus created the earth, the heavens, and all things that in them are. After mankind was created on the earth, Jesus directed His servants the prophets. He was the God of the Old Testament who spoke to Adam, Noah, Enoch, Abraham, Moses, Isaiah, and others. He made promises to His covenant people and fulfilled those covenants when the children of our Father were obedient.

Believe that Jesus did only the will of the Father
Jesus said, “I do nothing of myself; but as my Father hath taught me, I speak these things. And he that sent me is with me: the Father hath not left me alone; for I do always those things that please him.” (John 8:28-29) He subjected His will to God and set an example for us to do the same.

Because of His love for us, Jesus was born into mortality and subjected Himself to the same temptations, pains, anguish, and suffering that we would endure. He did this so that He would know how to succor us and help us in our afflictions. Jesus did all things that He was asked to do by our Father. Because He was willing to give everything, Father gave Him power to do all things, even the power to overcome death and hell.

Believe that Jesus is our Savior and Redeemer
Knowing that all of His children save One would fall prey to temptation in their attempt to be obedient, our Father in Heaven provided a Savior and Redeemer who would save us from our sins. Jesus is that Savior. He was able to make that payment because He was without sin.

On the Mount of Olives, in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus prepared to offer Himself as a ransom and sacrifice for all. From the eleven remaining Apostles, He took with Him Peter, James, and John, and told them to stay and watch with him. Jesus was “sorrowful, even unto death,” because of the severity of what he was about to do. As He knelt in prayer, Jesus plead with the Father, saying, “O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.” (Matthew 26:38-39)

In the moment of deepest need, His three most trusted Apostles slept and could not watch or console Him. Father sent an angel from heaven to comfort Him. “And being in agony, he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.” (Luke 22:43-44)

Much later, Jesus revealed to the Prophet Joseph Smith, “For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent; But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I; Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit—and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink – Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men.” (Doctrine & Covenants 19:16-19)

All believing saints prior to that time observed and kept the Law of Sacrifice in similitude of the one true sacrifice that would be made by the Lamb of God. They placed their hope in a Savior that could take away the guilt and remorse from their sins. They had faith in the words of the prophets that a Savior would be born. They were able to repent of their sins and benefit from His infinite atonement, even though their faith was in a sacrifice that was yet to be made. And then it was finished. Jesus did what He said he would do in the grand councils of heaven. He overcame the claim of hell on the imperfect through their faith and repentance. He ended the lies of the great deceiver who led away a third of Father’s children. Jesus paid the price for our sins as He trod the winepress alone.

As the prophet Isaiah wrote, “Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.” (Isaiah 53:4-7)

Following this eternal moment of triumph over sin, when Jesus answered the prayers of all faithful who had gone before, He was immediately betrayed with a kiss by his own Apostle, Judas. After He had given His blood to pay the price of atonement, He was then bound and given to the hands of murderers who would not reverence His magnificent gift.

Just as the price of sin was made alone by the Holy One, there was little that anyone could do to assist Jesus in his final task. His disciples forsook him, and fled. Peter denied knowing Jesus three times. Jesus was tried before Annas and Caiaphas. He was beaten, spit upon, and ridiculed. Jesus was then questioned by Herod and Pilot. As the King of the Jews, He was stripped, scourged, crowned with thorns, and given a robe of purple. Then with very little strength remaining, Jesus was given a cross to bear for His own crucifixion.

After being nailed securely to His cross, Jesus was lifted up before the world. This act represented the shame of the Jews in two ways. Truly, many were ashamed of Him, because they thought Him guilty of unforgiveable blasphemies. Sadly, they were also shamed by their own pride and hardhearted state, because no other people in creation would kill their own God.

There at the end, few were left to mourn with Jesus. Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve said, “Thus, of divine necessity, the supporting circle around Jesus gets smaller and smaller and smaller…. John stood at the foot of the cross with Jesus’s mother. Especially and always the blessed women in the Savior’s life stayed as close to Him as they could. But essentially His lonely journey back to His Father continued without comfort or companionship.” (Ensign, May 2009)

Darkness covered the land and Jesus felt the spirit withdraw, sufficient for Him to complete His sacrifice completely alone. In anguish He exclaimed, “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46) Having faith in the Father He knew was there but could not feel, Jesus exclaimed, “It is finished….” Jesus had done His Father’s will in every respect. (John 19:30) Then He continued, “Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit….” With that last effort, Jesus gave up the ghost and surrendered His body. Just as His spirit and His body were separated, the veil of the temple, that light separation between us and the Holy One of Israel, was rent in two.

Jesus Christ freely gave to us gifts that can never be repaid. He subjected Himself to the same conditions that we all must pass through and then did that which we could not do for ourselves. Through His incomprehensible gift of love that permitted Him to feel and carry the sins of all mankind, and by the ultimate gift of laying down His life for each of us, Jesus overcame both death and hell. It was with His own blood that the price of eternity was paid.

Believe that Jesus arose from the dead
On the morning of the third day following his death, Mary Magdalene and other women returned to the tomb where they had laid Jesus so they could anoint his body with spices. As they approached, they found the stone had been rolled away from the tomb. Two angels met them and declared to them that Jesus was no longer there, for he had risen from the dead. Likewise, when Peter and John returned to the tomb, they also found it empty and returned home

Mary Magdalene remained at the tomb after the others had left and she wept. It was there that the risen Jesus appeared to her. He comforted her and told her that He had not yet ascended to His Father, but would soon appear to His disciples. Shortly afterward, Jesus appeared to two men on the road to Emmaus. He also appeared to eleven of the Apostles. Many witnessed that Jesus became the firstfruits of them that slept. Being the Son of the Eternal Father, power was given to Him to take up His body again and live immortally with eternal life.

Believe enough to change
There are many points upon which we can base our faith in Jesus Christ. It is one thing to merely believe that Jesus lived on the earth. Believing that He was the literal Son of God is another step forward. If we believe that He truly performed miracles, healed the sick, raised the dead, and was Himself resurrected, then we have no reason to doubt that He truly is our Savior and Redeemer. If Jesus did the will of the Father, and the Father cannot lie, then we have every reason to believe that what Jesus said is true. This is especially applicable to his doctrine and teachings.

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30)

“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33)

“If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.” (John 15:7)

“I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” (John 14:18)

Before the death of Jesus Christ, when the Apostle Thomas asked Jesus how we might know the way to the Father, Jesus replied, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father but by me.” (John 14:6)

If we believe in Jesus enough to believe that what He said is true, then should we not believe that He will keep all of His promises? Will He not give us rest, answer our prayers, and show us the way? The only correct answer is yes. He will do all this and more if we are faithful disciples and not just admirers.

The proof of our discipleship is not in our willingness to take upon us His name, it is in the doing of it. This is the only way to lasting happiness. If you are a disciple then you likely already know this. If you are only a casual admirer, you may never know. Discipleship comes one action at a time. The decision to move past being willing to follow Jesus and actually following him is as thin as a veil. It is a veil of unbelief, and yet a veil that can be lifted. We learn by trying. Like Peter, we can obtain this knowledge from God through faith.


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