Signs of the Second Coming

The act of looking for a sign is an interesting thing, particularly the signs of when Jesus Christ will come again in glory. On one hand, the Savior warned against an adulterous generation who seeks for a sign. (Matthew 16:4) On the other, the Lord also commanded His disciples to watch for the signs of His coming. (Matthew 24:42) This comparison is worth pondering when studying the topic of the Second Coming. A more specific question to ask is, “Am I looking for signs as proof or for hope?” I think intent will determine whether the topic is sensational or spiritual.

In preparation for stake conference this weekend, I have been thinking of some scriptures that pertain to the signs of the Second Coming. I am listing them here as a reference, not as a talk or a message, but a compilation of topics grouped by specific signs. For someone who may not be familiar with the signs recorded in the scriptures, this list will provide an overview of these events.

I have listed some of the scriptural references pertaining to these signs in five categories. “Long before” refers to events that were to take place long before the Lord’s coming. “Sometime before” refers to events that will precede the Second Coming but do not have a specific timeframe. “Just before” refers to events that the scriptures say will occur just before His Coming. “After” refers to events that will take place following His coming and “Near the end” lists some signs that are often included with the signs of the times but will pertain to the end of the Millennium.

No effort has been made to predict the order of these latter-day events except to follow the order in which these scriptural references appear in their respective accounts. This summary does group each of the scriptural accounts with like scriptures that relate to the sign being described. Thus, each of the bolded words or phrases refer to a specific or related sign of the time. This list does not contain all signs of the Second Coming, but does group those found in Daniel 7, Joseph Smith Matthew, and sections 29, 45, 88, 116, and 133 of the Doctrine & Covenants.

Lastly, there are some notes I have made for my own use which are typed in blue. This includes questions I have pondered and notes that help to understand how some of the signs relate to others.

If you have read this far, perhaps it is because you have some interest in understanding the signs of the second coming. I hope this list of scriptural references is helpful in your own personal study.


What I Believe…


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

 


Long before

Apostasy
False Christs. Many will say that they are Christ and will deceive many.
JSM 1:6

The apostles will be hated and killed.
JSM 1:7

Many will be offended, and will hate and betray one another.
JSM 1:8

False prophets will arise.
JSM 1:9

The love of many will wax cold.
JSM 1:10

Abomination of Desolation
Stand in the holy place when you see the abomination of desolation
JSM 1:12

Temple, and Jerusalem to be destroyed
D&C 45:18-20
JSM 1:3

Judah will flee to the mountains.
JSM 1:13-17

Great tribulation on the Jews, which are the beginning of their sorrows.
JSM 1:18-19

Hastening
Those days will be shortened for the elects sake.
JSM 1:20

Scattering of Israel
Israel will be scattered among all nations
D&C 45:19, 24


Sometime before

Continued apostasy
Again, false Christs and false prophets will arise showing great signs and wonders to deceive the elect. He will not be in the desert or secret places.
JSM 1:22, 25

Hastening
The Lord will hasten His work
D&C 88:73 (this is a prophecy for the last days)

Wars and commotion
In the times of the Gentiles there will be wars and rumors of wars, the earth will be in commotion, men’s hearts will fail them, they will say that God delays His coming. The love of men shall wax cold. Fear will come upon all people.
D&C 45:26-27
D&C 88:91
JSM 1:23, 28-29, 30

In spite of earthquakes and desolations, men will take up the sword and kill one another.
D&C 45:33

Preaching of the gospel
Angels (first mention) will fly in the midst of heaven to prepare the people for the coming of the Lord.
D&C 88:92
D&C 133:17

Angel flying in the midst of heaven having the everlasting gospel will appear unto many.
D&C 133:36

The gospel will be preached unto every nation, kindred, tongue, and people.
D&C 133:37
JSM 1:31

The servants of God will say: Fear God, and give glory to Him, for the hour of His judgment is come. Worship Him.
D&C 133:38-39

In the times of the Gentiles the gospel will be taken to those who sit in darkness. Many will not receive it because of the precepts of men.
D&C 45:28-29

In this generation the times of the Gentiles will be fulfilled
D&C 45:30

Parable of the fig tree – when the light begins to break forth, summer is nigh at hand.
D&C 45:36-38
JSM 1:38

Gathering of Israel
The elect will be gathered like eagles to the carcass from the four quarters of the earth.
JSM 1:27

Restoration of scattered Israel
D&C 45:17

Remnant will remain scattered until the times of the Gentiles is fulfilled
D&C 45:25

The remnant will be gathered to their place
D&C 45:43

Watching for signs
Those that fear the Lord will look for the great day of the Lord to come, even the signs of His coming.
D&C 45:39

Those who don’t watch for the signs will be cut off.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:44

The servants of God will pray that He will come down and rend the heavens, and cause the mountains to flow down. Their prayer will be answered.
D&C 133:40-41

The Lord has prepared great things for those who wait for Him.
D&C 133:45

Watch, for you know not the day nor the hour that the Lord will come. Be ready.
JSM 1:40, 46, 48

Signs and wonders
There will be signs and wonders in heaven and on earth.
D&C 45:40

Blood, fire, and vapors of smoke.
D&C 45:40-41
(See also “signs in heaven” below)

Famines
There shall be famines.
JSM 1:29

Scourge
A desolation sickness will cover the land.
D&C 45:31

Pestilences
JSM 1:29

Holy Places
Disciples will stand in holy places.
D&C 45:32

Curses
The wicked will curse God and die.
D&C 45:32

Earthquakes and desolations
There will be earthquakes and many desolations in diverse places.
D&C 45:33
D&C 88:87-89
D&C 133:40
JSM 1:29

Testimony of thunder, lightning, tempests, and waves that heave themselves beyond their bounds
D&C 88:90

Zion, The New Jerusalem
The Lord will stand upon Mount Zion, the New Jerusalem with 144,000 with the name of the Father written on their foreheads.
D&C 133:18
D&C 84:2

The New Jerusalem will be a land of peace, a city of refuge, and a place of safety.
D&C 45:66

The wicked will not come to Zion because of the glory and terror of the Lord which will be upon it.
D&C 45:67, 70

Those among the wicked who don’t want to fight will need to flee to Zion.
D&C 45:68

Righteous people from every nation will be gathered there.
D&C 45:68, 71

Those among the Gentiles are to flee to Zion.
D&C 133:12

The Lord will utter His voice out of Zion. (When?)
D&C 133:21

Return of the city of Enoch (Not sure if this will be before, at, or after.)
D&C 45:11-14

Jerusalem
Those among the Jews are to flee to Jerusalem, and the mountains of the Lord’s house. (Is this referring to the Mount of Olives rather than the temple?)
D&C 133:13

The Lord will speak from Jerusalem. (When?)
D&C 133:21

Ocean and Islands
The Lord to stand upon the ocean and the islands.
D&C 133:20

Land returns
Voice of many waters and thunder will break down the mountains. The valleys shall not be found.
D&C 133:22

The lands of Jerusalem and Zion will be returned to their own place as it was before it was divided.
D&C 133:22

Water returns
The great deep will be driven back into the north countries. The islands will become one land.
D&C 133:23

Gathering at Adam-ondi-Ahman
Adam, the Ancient of Days, meets at Adam-ondi-Ahman. 1 million minister to him. 100 million stand before him. The Son of Man comes and is given dominion, glory, and a kingdom that all people will serve Him.
Daniel 7:9-14
D&C 116:1

Hailstorm
Great hailstorm that will destroy the crops of the earth. (Before or after the famine?)
D&C 29:16

Vengeance
Vengeance on the wicked. Flies and maggots will devour their flesh. Tongues shall be stayed. Flesh will fall off their bones, and eyes from their sockets. Beasts and fowls will devour them. (Why won’t the beasts and fowls be affected? Or will they?)
D&C 29:16-20


Just before

Abomination of desolation
Daniel’s vision of the abomination of desolation will again be fulfilled.
JSM 1:32

Mount of Olives
Jesus will stand on the Mount of Olives and it will cleave in two creating a great valley.
D&C 45:48
D&C 133:20
Zech 14:4-7

Jews will ask about the tokens in Jesus’ hands and feet. They will know Jesus is the Son of God and will weep.
D&C 45:51-53

Signs in heaven
Immediately after angels (first mention in D&C 88) fly through the midst of heaven to prepare the way, a great sign will appear in heaven, and all people will see it together.
D&C 88:93

Another angel (second mention, “first trump?”) will sound his trump regarding the mother of abominations, the great and abominable church, and all nations will hear it.
D&C 88:94

There will be silence in heaven for half an hour.
D&C 88:95

Immediately after, the curtain of heaven will be unfolded as a scroll. The face of the Lord shall be unveiled. (I’m not certain as to when the other signs in heaven will occur, whether before or after.)
D&C 88:95

Sun darkened, moon turned to blood, stars will fall, greater signs
D&C 29:14
D&C 45:42
D&C 88:87
D&C 133:49
JSM 1:33

The heavens will shake
D&C 45:48
JSM 1:33
(See also “signs and wonders” above)

The Lord Appears
The Lord will reveal Himself in the clouds with the hosts of heaven.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:44

The Lord will come in power and glory.
D&C 29:11
D&C 45:16
JSM 1:36

As the light of the morning comes out of the east, so shall the coming of the Son of Man be.
JSM 1:26

Judgment of the righteous
The Twelve in Jerusalem will Judge the House of Israel.
D&C 29:12

Resurrection
Righteous dead will be resurrected, trump will sound (second mention, “first trump?”), earth will quake.
D&C 29:13
D&C 88:98
D&C 133:56

The heathen nations who knew no law will be resurrected
D&C 45:54

Meeting in the cloud
Two will be in the field, or the mill, and one will be taken.
JSM 1:44-45

The Lord will meet those who rejoice and work righteousness and remember Him.
D&C 133:44

The saints who are alive will be quickened and caught up to meet the Lord in the cloud.
D&C 88:96

The saints who have slept will meet the Lord in the cloud.
D&C 45:45
D&C 88:97

The parable of the ten virgins will be fulfilled. Those who are wise will not be cast into the fire.
D&C 45:56

Voice of the Lord
The Lord will utter his voice, and the ends of the earth shall hear it.
D&C 45:49

Second Trump: Redemption from spirit prison
Another angel (third mention, “second trump”) will sound. Those who accepted the gospel in the spirit world will be resurrected
D&C 88:99

Vengeance
The adversaries of the Lord will tremble at His presence when He does terrible things that they aren’t looking for.
D&C 133:42

The arm of the Lord will fall upon all nations.
D&C 45:47

The Lord will make bare His holy arm in the eyes of all the nations.
D&C 133:42

The Lord will come down in garments dyed red.
D&C 133:46-48

Wicked will burn
The presence of the Lord will be as a melting fire that burns and causes waters to boil.
D&C 133:3

Wicked will be burned as stubble that wickedness will not be on the earth
D&C 29:9
D&C 45:50
D&C 133:64
Malachi 4:1

The great and abominable church will be cast down by fire.
D&C 29:21

Third Trump: Those who will remain in spirit prison
Another angel (fourth mention, “third trump”) will sound. Those in spirit prison who are condemned will remain the thousand years are ended.
D&C 88:100-101

Fourth Trump: Sons of perdition
Another angel (fifth mention, “fourth trump”) will sound. There are those among those who will remain in the spirit prison those who will remain filthy still (sons of perdition)
D&C 88:102

Fifth Trump: The hour of judgment has come
Another angel (sixth mention, “fifth trump”) will sound. All people, in heaven, in earth, and under the earth shall hear: Fear God, and give glory to him who sitteth upon the throne, forever and ever; for the hour of his judgment has come.
D&C 88:103-104

Sixth Trump: She is fallen
Another angel (seventh mention, “sixth trump”) will sound. The whore of all the earth is fallen.
D&C 88:105

Seventh Trump: It is finished
Another angel, Michael the archangel, (eighth mention, “seventh trump”) will sound. The Lamb of God hath overcome and trodden the wine-press alone
D&C 88:106

The angels will be crowned with the glory. The saints shall be filled with His Glory, receive their inheritance, and be made equal with the Lamb in power, might, and dominion.
D&C 76:95
D&C 88:107

Repeated Trumps: Revealing the secret acts of men, Satan is bound
The first angel will sound his trump again, revealing the secret acts of men and the mighty works of God in the first thousand years. Each of the other angels will do the same making known these things for each thousand years until the seventh.
D&C 88:108-109

The seventh angel will sound his trump and will swear that there is time no longer, and Satan will be not be loosed for a thousand years.
D&C 88:110


After

Satan will be bound
Satan will have no place in the hearts of men.
D&C 45:55

The earth will be an inheritance
Those who were wise, like the five virgins, will multiply and their children will grow up without sin.
D&C 45:58

The Lord will reign
The Lord will dwell with men on earth a thousand years.
D&C 29:11

The Lord will be in the midst of the righteous. He will be their king and their lawgiver.
D&C 45:59

The Lord will stand in the midst of His people and will reign over all flesh.
D&C 133:25

The return of the Lost Tribes of Israel
(Not sure if this is before or after the second coming. It comes after D&C 133:25 which is commonly associated with the millennial reign. The references are placed here as a placeholder.)

Those in the north countries will come in remembrance of the Lord.
D&C 133:26

The prophets of the Lost Tribes will hear the Lords voice and will no longer stay themselves.
D&C 133:26

They will smite the rocks and the ice and it will flow down at their presence. A highway shall be cast up in the great deep.
D&C 133:26-27

Their enemies will be a prey to them.
D&C 133:28

There will be pools of water in barren deserts.
D&C 133:29

The Lost Tribes will bring their rich treasures to Ephraim.
D&C 133:30

The everlasting hills will tremble at their presence.
D&C 133:31

They will be crowned with glory by Ephraim in Zion.
D&C 133:32

Judah will be sanctified
Judah will be sanctified after their pain so that they can dwell in the presence of God.
D&C 133:35


Near the End

Wickedness returns
When the thousand years are ended, men will begin to deny God.
D&C 29:22

A little season
The earth is spared for a little season
D&C 29:22

Satan will be loosed for a little season to gather his armies.
D&C 88:111

The Battle of the Great God
Michael will gather his armies, even the hosts of heaven.
D&C 88:112

The devil will gather his armies, even the hosts of hell to come up to battle with Michael and his armies.
D&C 88:113

Then cometh the battle of the great God, the devil and his armies will be cast away. Michael will overcome him.
D&C 88:114-115

The resurrection
Before the end, Michael will sound his trump and the righteous will be resurrected.
D&C 29:22

The end
Heaven and earth shall be consumed and pass away. A new heaven and a new earth.
D&C 29:22

The beginning
The earth abideth the laws of the celestial kingdom and will be quickened after it passes away, and the righteous will inherit it.
D&C 88:25-26

Why I Believe

This morning, my thoughts are turned to what I consider the singularly most significant morning of my life. I was not there, but I believe. More than that, I feel. In my mind I see brief moments where a supposed gardener spoke to a woman who was crying. Mary Magdalene was beyond sorrowful, first at the death of Jesus, and secondly, because His body which she had prepared for burial had been taken. It took only one word to renew her hope. Mary. The Lord spoke her name in a very personal way, and she recognized the Master.

I realize that she and I share something in common. Both of us believed in something that we did not see with our eyes, yet heard and then felt in our hearts. This prescribed pattern for most believers is the same, to trust in things that we cannot see but hope are true – things that we feel.

Before Jesus offered his life as a ransom in Gethsemane and at Golgotha, he told his apostles, “These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you. But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you. Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. (John 14:25-27)

Pondering on the magnitude of the Savior’s sacrifice and the miracle of His glorious resurrection, I am filled with gratitude that He would offer such wonderful gifts to a soul so rebellious and proud as mine. Because He triumphed over the effects of sin and death, I can too. Through His holy name, I can believe, become clean, and live in His presence again. I can be there with family, friends, and loved ones because this gift is offered to all who will believe.

I may not hear the Lord’s voice as clearly as did Mary, but I can still hear His voice call my name when I listen to the voice of His Holy Spirit. When I pay attention to the peace and comforting feeling that attends all truth, the Holy Ghost brings special feelings to my remembrance. It is then that I remember how it feels to be called by the voice of the Master. In a very personal way, I can recognize His invitation to follow Him and have the assurance that it is right.

Had I been at the empty tomb with Mary, and seen the angels who were present, I may not have believed any more than she. Yet as I learn to recognize the promptings of the Holy Ghost, my revelation is as clear as hers. The Master lives, for He is risen. Because of that glorious morning, there will be an eternity of beautiful mornings. Each morning we may hear His voice, if we will but pause to listen and then recognize the Master.



What I Believe…


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

What Should I Do?

Occasionally someone I know will ask me a general question about confessions. Often the question they want to ask is, “I have done something wrong, and I want to fix it, but do I need to talk to my bishop?” Moments like these are very personal and delicate. Admitting guilt and acknowledging our weaknesses is a difficult thing to do.

Generally, I think there is an awareness that serious transgressions require a confession. This would include deliberate offenses to another person such as intentional physical injury, sexual violations, abuse of any kind, theft, fraud, or illegal activity. Yet, if an individual’s sins are not of that magnitude, he or she may not know if confession is necessary, especially if the sin appears to involve no one else but the individual.

It is not uncommon for someone who has made a serious mistake to wonder, “How do I know if I need to talk to my bishop? What should I say? How much do I have to tell, and what will happen?” I think there are a number of people who could enjoy more peace in their lives if they knew the answers to these questions and acted on them.

The Lord, Himself, said, “Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more. By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins – behold, he will confess them and forsake them.” He also said, “I, the Lord, forgive sins, and am merciful unto those who confess their sins with humble hearts….” Doctrine & Covenants 58:42-43, 61:2)

The simplest answer of how to know if you should confess to a priesthood leader is to follow the promptings of the Holy Ghost. A baptized member of the Lord’s Church is entitled to the companionship of the Holy Ghost. That is what the Lord intends. In His role as the Comforter, the Holy Ghost can provide spiritual guidance, comfort, and peace. If you do not feel His influence, that may be the first indicator that something else is missing. If you have made personal efforts to repent and have confessed to God in prayer, but still do not feel divine help, you may want to council with a bishop to determine why.

Another instance that may suggest a need for confession is when an individual has sinned and made restitution, but does not feel forgiven. It’s as though thoughts of the sin continue to linger and weigh on the mind. A bishop can help an individual determine if there is more they need to do to be forgiven, or if they are simply being harder on themselves than the Lord. Let me share a personal example.

When I was fourteen, I made some poor choices that led to some poorer decisions. This led to a sin that I was ashamed of. In this case, I was not guilty of a serious transgression, but I no longer felt at peace in my life. What I did feel was sincere remorse and I wanted to do whatever it took to have that burden lifted. At the same time, I didn’t want to expose my weaknesses to anyone else. I prayed repeatedly for forgiveness, yet this didn’t seem enough.

Shortly after I prayed, the idea came to my mind that maybe I should talk with my bishop. I dismissed the thought, thinking my sins weren’t that serious, but the idea lingered. It had a presence in my mind that almost seemed to gently nag. I later recognized that persistent presence as the influence and companionship of the Holy Ghost, trying to guide me and answer my prayer.

Finding some courage, and feeling that confession would ease my conscience, I asked my bishop if I could meet with him. He kindly replied yes. Having since served as a bishop, myself, I can imagine how happy he was that I asked him for that opportunity. As we sat together in his office, I didn’t know what to say. I felt awkward. My situation was very uncomfortable. Feeling a need to do something, I began.

I shared with the bishop how I felt at the time, that something was still troubling me. I told him a little about what I had done, enough for him to understand what my sin was. I then explained what I had done to repent and how I still felt uncomfortable. I asked what I should do. He was very kind and understanding. He listened. I hope every bishop will listen as well as he did. My bishop then gave me some counsel. He offered some specific suggestions that would help me avoid the same mistake again. He helped me to clearly understand the impact of my decisions and he reassured me. In that instance, nothing more was needed. He thanked me for talking with him and offered his help again if I needed it.

As I left his office, I remember having an incredible feeling. The heavy burden I carried on my shoulders when I went into his office had been lifted. It was gone. I felt capable and happy. The peace I had been seeking had returned. At that moment, I felt the importance of a bishop as a Judge in Israel. I felt at peace with God, and that was truly worth any amount of discomfort to have it back.

A voluntary willingness to confess and admit one’s sins demonstrates a repentant attitude. Sometimes prayer may not be enough, simply because we need the help of others to overcome greater sins. When our faith is combined, it is much easier to accomplish difficult things. I am grateful to have learned that lesson at an early age.


What I Believe…


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Something Worth Sharing

A little over seventeen years ago I sat in the Celestial Room of the Oakland Temple in California. I had just attended a worship service and was waiting to meet some friends I had not seen in a long time. I will never forget the excitement I felt as they gradually entered the quiet room. Familiar feelings accompanied familiar faces. It was a beautiful moment.

 

The Bacons were the real reason I was there. I met this couple and their two boys when a missionary companion and I were asked to tell them about our beliefs. We shared with them a message about the eternal nature of families and how the gospel of Jesus Christ could help them. Since the time we first met, they decided to be baptized and were confirmed members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. One year later they wanted to have their marriage sealed in the Holy Temple. I was there to see it.

 

That particular Saturday is very special to me. It was the last weekend of the mission I served for my church. The fact that I could attend a temple sealing for the Bacons was a crowning point. Being there in the Temple that day was truly a highlight.

 

In contrast to the excitement I felt for my friends, I also felt some anxiety and sadness. While I wanted to see my family again, I didn’t want to leave all the people I had come to love. I knew that I was about to be separated again for a very long time.

 

The next day I attended church with the congregation not far from my apartment. I continued to have mixed feelings. During the meeting I thought about the unique experiences I had had and the friends I had made. I was overwhelmed and I began to cry. My heart was full of gratitude. In that moment I felt the worth of what I had to share.

 

The teachings of the Savior Jesus Christ have brought me so much joy, more than anything else I have ever experienced. When these blessings are coupled with someone to share them with, they become so much greater. In that moment of sharing, I feel blessed, and the person I share with is also blessed. In a couple of short weeks it was possible for me to feel as close to a new friend as I had with someone I had known my whole life. I attribute that to the power of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

 

Of all the experiences I have had, the events at the end of my mission are memories I will never forget. I also observed three things:

• It is so rewarding to share when someone is hungry for what you have to offer, especially when what you have to share has great worth.
• The presence and influence of the Holy Ghost can enhance and enrich any relationship, and very often makes it stronger and more binding.
• Living your life in such a way that you can meet friends and family in the presence of God is worth any sacrifice.

My experience in the temple that day became a powerful reminder to me. When I think of my friends who gradually entered the Celestial Room of the temple, and when I remember leaving them again at the end of my mission, I can’t help but think of another meeting that I want to be worthy of. I know God lives and that He has prepared a plan that will help us to be reunited with loved ones again. I am grateful He is willing to provide help all along the way. That help is definitely something worth sharing. I’m glad I got to share it with the Bacons.

 

 

What I Believe…

 

 

http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Struggles with Guilt

I was nine. My friend and I were playing at his house. We went to a part we knew was off limits. There in front of us were piles of pornographic magazines. We didn’t go there looking for them, but we were curious about why we weren’t allowed in the room. It didn’t take long to find out. I was hesitant at first, but I chose to pick one up and browse through its pages. To this day, simply mentioning the topic of pornography will retrieve a few of those images to my mind. Some parts are still very clear, unless I purposefully block them. I’ve found I am not alone.

Over the last few years, it has been my privilege to be at important crossroads for a lot of people. I have interviewed candidates who are excited to serve a full-time mission for our church. I have met with a large number of young couples who are planning to get married. Some of those marriages I have performed. I have also done a fair share of marriage counseling to help couples who have been together for a long time. Many of these moments have been beautiful.

In a large number of my interviews, I have become aware how similar my childhood experience was to other men and women. They, at a young age, were exposed to explicit images that have had a powerful affect on them. Quite often they were exposed repeatedly. Frequently, this repetition was accompanied with some form of abuse or some other violation of personal comfort. It is not uncommon for a single act taught to a child to be repeated again in their own life. It is heartbreaking to discover this kind of pain at a crossroads-moment that should be beautiful, especially if this discovery creates a speed bump or an obstacle that delays an anticipated goal such as marriage.

Considering what I know now, I feel lucky to have escaped more painful incidents at a young age – very lucky. My encounters with explicit images did not result in a habit-forming addiction to pornography, but I wasn’t immune. It is still a temptation. My early experiences awakened feelings that are both powerful and personal. Desires were aroused that made it difficult to control my thoughts and actions. Though I repented of my sins and feel forgiven, I still feel a degree of shame for my actions.

Had my exposure to images and desire been more frequent, I don’t know that I would have escaped the more malignant sins that are becoming increasingly common. I believe I would be caught in much greater torment like so many friends I know who have been affected their whole lives. Though my personal circumstances were less disastrous, I tasted enough of desire and shame to relate to someone who is struggling. I know the power of an addiction. I also understand the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and it is beautiful. It is real.

Jesus Christ is the only perfect being to live in mortality on this earth. Not only was He born into the same conditions that we all experience, He took upon Himself our sins and transgressions. He felt the weight of our sins as He paid the price of our shame and guilt. “Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows…. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities … and with his stripes we are healed. (Isaiah 53:4-5)

Before I “esteem him naught,” thinking that He can’t help me, or any of us, out of a difficult mistake, I have to remind myself that Jesus has already taken upon Himself our sins. The ransom has already been paid. The work has been done, at least the part that would otherwise seem impossible. What is left is an opportunity to have faith in Him, believing that He is mighty to save. He is waiting for me to trust Him and turn to Him in my struggles so He can help.

Knowing there are many who battle with desires, addictions, and sins that they are uncomfortable talking about – who consequently feel alone, ashamed, and afraid – I wish I could reach out and place my hand on their shoulder to say, “It’s okay. Struggle is synonymous with being human. There is hope. We can change.”

While sin is not acceptable to God, it is a condition of life we must all overcome. The size of the sin matters less than what we individually do with what we have been given. It is unfair to compare our sins with anyone else’s. As long as our conditions are not identical, and we are not the same, any comparison may be very misleading. It is always best to compare yourself with yourself, and the Savior. He can show us what we can do through faith. We will show ourselves where we have been so that we can learn from our own experience.

I want others who are struggling to not feel alone. There is hope. You shouldn’t feel shame because you think your challenges are uncommon. They likely are not. You should feel shame when you choose to do something wrong. When stimulating images affect you, you shouldn’t feel guilty for the natural desires you have. Remember, the desires are a gift from God. You should feel guilty if you give up your agency for pleasure. Being tempted is not wrong. Giving in to temptation, or choosing to put yourself in a place where you are more likely to give in to temptation, is sin.

I believe our struggles become easier with a little help. It helps to know we all have needs, and we all struggle to learn from them. We are not so alone. It helps to know that we don’t have to feel guilt for having desires, as long as we work to control them. It’s beautiful to know that God will provide us with help as often as we are willing to turn to Him. The difficulty may not go away, but He will help. If we exercise faith, He will prove that we are not alone. He wants to be invited at our important crossroads and struggles.



What I Believe…


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Trying My Hand

They were skeptics, and rightfully so. Five years ago, my wife’s brothers had stopped by for a visit and I showed them my most recent project. By the somewhat veiled expressions on their faces, I could tell that they weren’t sure what to make of it. I was confidently amused.

Downstairs, the walls of the small workroom in our house were canvassed with life-size sketches and photographs. A table was positioned in the middle of the room to make working easier. On top sat a small sheet of particle board with a mound of clay that, to some, resembled an alien. “Hmm,” their eyes whispered sideways. “That’s really something.”

Ten hours into my work, I looked at the vague shape of clay that would eventually take me just over fifty to complete. I had never done a sculpture like this one before, and only had a vague sense of where I would go next. Whether or not I actually got there mattered less at that moment. I felt I had to try.

The process was beautiful. Each gesture of my hands made a subtle refinement. The sensory feeling of clay giving way to my fingers pulled me into the sculpture. Carefully I studied the sketches and photos of my model from every angle. I checked proportions and made adjustments. With every lift, push, and expression, the abstract form began to take life.

I savored the last ten hours of sculpting. By that point, the clay no longer looked unrecognizable. There was an excitement of getting close, of realizing my purpose. The clay had its own meaning just waiting to speak. As the detail of each feature became clearer, a stronger resemblance to its intrinsic design, I felt great satisfaction. My work didn’t have to be perfect. It was mine, and I was pleased.

Afterward, I enjoyed sitting and looking at the form in front of me. I compared two notions. While the form felt like something I had made with my own hands, it also felt like a person that I merely rescued or liberated from the clay – it was a mixture of ability and opportunity.

Quite often I like to pray over my work. I try to express gratitude for opportunities that seem to be given to me. No man is an island, and all good things come from God. I also like to pray for insight on how to improve my work and make it better. When these prayers are answered, I feel that divine guidance is added to ability and opportunity. It is a simple yet wonderful gift to be taught by impressions from God.

As for the skeptics, they really weren’t disbelieving. They just didn’t see at first. My brothers had a different understanding when they returned a week later and saw the finished product.

So often in life, the tangible evidence in front of us may not accurately describe what our work can become. More faith, please. When I believe in my own ability to act, and God’s ability to provide assistance, it’s easier to attempt things I haven’t tried before. I may not know completely what I am doing, but my faith can make up the difference.

As I shape my own life, it is very reassuring to follow a good model. Minor adjustments may not always feel good when I am the clay being sculpted. Yet when I feel I am getting closer to the true meaning of my life, those adjustments become very rewarding. That happens when I remember the purpose of why I am here. The Savior Jesus Christ is my model. Every refinement I make that increases my resemblance to Him gives me satisfaction. I feel freer as I take his image into my countenance. I look forward to when I, with Him, can look back on my life and see what we sculpted together.


What I Believe…


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Watch

There is a delicious anxiety that clings to the winter holidays each year. It’s beautiful to see, unsettling when you feel it, and yet Christmas would not seem the same without it. If the feeling of waiting wasn’t worth the effort, the prelude would be torture.

Watching a young child watch a present under a tree can be quite amusing. There is so much anticipation invested in the unknown gift. While some might beg to open the present before the appointed time, others find the courage to shake the present and guess at what it contains.

Recalling a childhood memory, a friend recently told me how curiosity often bested her before Christmas morning. Unable to wait, she would secretly open her gifts, wrap them back up, and then pretend to be surprised. Though now a grandmother, there was a mischievous gleam in her eye as she confessed that this is a tradition she is still guilty of.

Waiting for company to arrive when you are expecting a visit can supplement any holiday anxiety quite nicely. As a boy, I would repeatedly go to the window to see if family or friends had come yet. Many times I would be disappointed – every time, in fact, except the last time. I’m happy to admit this is a tradition I continue to keep.

Now that I’m older, I still get deliciously anxious at the holidays. Christmas is somewhat different from when I was little, but I still find so much to look forward to.

The past few weeks have provided numerous reasons for me to think about the coming of the Lord Jesus Christ. While celebrating His miraculous birth, I have also considered what it was like for those who were watching and waiting. I think they must have felt some of that delicious anxiety after seeing the star, or hearing the voices of heralding angels.

Similarly I have pondered His second coming that believers anxiously await. Like pulling out familiar decorations from the basement, or extracting a small piece of chocolate from an advent calendar, there are preparations right now that suggest the season of His coming is getting closer. How soon? I don’t know. But I am watching.

There is a difference in seeking a sign because of disbelief and watching for signs because you do believe. Jesus himself said that those who believe will be looking for the great day of the Lord to come, even the signs of His coming. Those who are not watching will be unprepared. Those who are ready will be invited to the wedding. (Doctrine & Covenants 45:39, 44, 57)

Many of the signs of Jesus’ coming foretold in the scriptures will be accompanied by great and terrible events. Some will make men anxious, and others will most definitely be worth the wait. Beautiful promises have been made to those who are faithful. The important thing is to watch and be ready at His coming. Perhaps all the years of waiting to open presents at Christmases past will pay off. Those who have learned to enjoy the anxious waiting before a holiday may find hope in doing difficult things. As for me, I plan to keep watch at the window.


Some concentrated sources for information on the signs of his coming can be found in Mathew 24; Mark 13; Luke 17 and 21; Doctrine & Covenants 29, 45, 88, and 133; and Joseph Smith Matthew 1.


What I Believe...


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

I'm a Mormon

Hi, I’m John McConkie

I’m a designer, an architect, a reader, a runner, and a family guy. I’m a Mormon.


About Me

Oh, and I also love deep conversations, music, philosophy, thinking, psychology, writing, poetry, sketching, painting, hiking, camping, cycling, and… the list goes on and on. I think there is an endless stream of good things to experience in life – things that are meaningful and fascinating. If you ever feel that you have so many interests that you have to pare things down, then you and I have something in common.

I love to live life with passion and intensity! I like to get the most out of life – enjoy it for all it’s worth. I would rather miss out on a little sleep than miss an opportunity that might not come around again. More than that, I love to share those things that have meaning with a friend. Having something in common like that really strengthens relationships, especially those that matter most. I don’t know what I would do without my family and close friends – people who care and stand by me in any circumstance, even when life isn’t so inspiring.

My favorite person to share with is my beautiful wife. She and I have been married for sixteen years and we have a family of three boys and two girls. They are a lot of work, but a LOT of fun! We have great times together. There is never a dull moment at our house, not unless everyone is gone. We may not have a perfect marriage, or a perfect family, but we definitely have something special that is worth cherishing!

For most of my life I have lived in Utah and I love it! I love the mountains and prairies, the beautiful snow, the deep forests, and the red rock deserts. Besides Utah, I have spent a lot of time living in California, too. It’s my other home. Give me a beach with a view of the ocean and I’m more than content. Most of the time, however, home is more of an attitude. When I am surrounded by my favorite people in the world, I can’t think of a better place to call home than that.


Why I am a Mormon

I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t acknowledge that I am a Mormon because of my family, at least to start with. Many of my family lines have been members of the church for eight generations and were among the pioneers who first came by wagon to settle the west. All the stories you may have heard about the Mormons coming west, well, that was them. They had a lot of faith. They left a lot behind, and they also left me a rich heritage of courage and determination that has shaped who I am. Yet that isn’t enough to for me to be a Mormon. You see, I’m big on experience, especially experiencing things for myself.

I’m a Mormon because of my own faith and what I have learned. I’m not a skeptic, but I tend to question everything. I want to know why, and I want to know for myself. Taking things on “good faith” isn’t enough for me. I want my own faith. I want to believe in something because it is right, and not just because someone else said so.

When I was younger – when I was in high school, in fact – I had an experience that changed me, or at least changed the way I thought about spiritual things. I had been taught to read the scriptures as a way to feel closer to God. I had read in the Old and New Testaments, and the Book of Mormon, and I believed they were true. I knew they were a record of God’s dealings with His children, but I hadn’t quite internalized them yet. That’s when things changed.

On one occasion, I was reading in the Book of Mormon when I felt something different. It wasn’t dramatic, and I didn’t see angels, but I felt something. It was while I was reading the story of a young man named Nephi. He was a good role model, but he seemed a little out of reach, like he was something that I couldn’t be. Nephi always seemed to be obedient. He wasn’t rebellious and he didn’t complain. Instead, he did his best to learn what God wanted him to do and then he did it, or so I thought.

I gained a new appreciation for Nephi, when I came to the part where he mentioned his weaknesses. I was shocked. Instead of thinking that he was close to perfect, I listened to him express his frustrations about temptations and how they could so easily overwhelm him. Suddenly I realized that this role model of a prophet was more like me than I had thought. I could relate, and that started a change. A small feeling of hope began to grow. That is when I felt something else.

As I continued to read, I experienced a comforting feeling that just felt good. It was peaceful yet inspiring and energizing. It felt new but familiar at the same time. Looking back, I believe it was something I had felt before but hadn’t quite recognized. That something was the witness of the Holy Ghost. I remember the impression coming to my mind that the words I had just read were true. The account wasn’t just a story. It was a true experience of someone who wasn’t that different from me. I felt like I had just made a friend because we shared something in common and he had given me encouragement.

This instance led me to other experiences in the scriptures where I learned more about the ministry of Jesus Christ in the New Testament. Instead of just reading, I internalized it. I studied the promises made to ancient prophets in the Old Testament, and I read about the appearance of Jesus Christ to the ancient people on this continent after His resurrection. Again and again I had that same confirming feeling that what I read was true. When I experienced this feeling, I felt connected with God – that somehow He was able to communicate with me through that comforting feeling to let me know he was pleased with what I was doing.

This feeling of closeness to God is the reason why I am a Mormon. When I learn something new and I get that feeling, I know I am heading in the right direction. I may be far from perfect, but that feeling gives me confidence. It also gives me a greater reason to have faith and make good choices when things are hard. The more I have learned about my own faith, the more I have felt that comforting feeling.

I know God lives, and I know He will speak to us through the feelings of the Holy Spirit. I Know Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer. Because of what I have felt, I know the Book of Mormon is true, and I know the Bible is true. This feeling of peace and comfort guides me in everything that I do. I know it is a pattern that God wants for all of His children.


How I Live My Faith

I don’t think my faith needs to be showy, but it should be apparent in how I live each day. For me, it starts with prayer. Because I believe in God, I pray to Him in the morning when I wake up. I kneel down at night, and sometimes I pray while I am I’m driving in my car. Wherever I am, I try not to let my prayers be repetitive. Since God is our Father in Heaven, I try to talk to Him like my father. I express my gratitude for how He has blessed me, and I ask Him for direction. When I do, I feel the influence of the Holy Spirit guide me to make good choices.

In addition to daily prayer, I still try to read in the scriptures every day. Some days it may be just a few verses, and other times I get to study a subject more in depth. As often as I do this with the intent to increase my faith and repent, I feel that connection with God that I felt years ago when I was in high school.

Quite often, praying and reading the scriptures is just a small part of how I live. The real test is how I act during the week when I’m not at church. It shows in the way I treat other people when I am at work. It also shows in the types of things I do when I have spare time. I am happier when I try to live like Jesus did. The gospel of Jesus Christ is so closely woven into everything I do. It has made me a kinder person. I am more patient and less selfish. I feel so much better when I am focusing outward toward others instead of just satisfying my own interests.

Living my faith has made our home a much better place, too. My love for my wife increases as I feel closer to God. When I try to follow Jesus Christ, I feel like a better husband and a better dad. If I can be a greater example, it’s more likely that our kids will try to do the same. This gives us the best chance possible to feel the comforting influence of the Holy Spirit in our home. When all of us feel that influence, we want to be better. We try harder. We have a deeper motivation to forgive each other and we are much, much happier. And to think, it all starts with faith.

Serving in the church gives me another opportunity to live my faith. Each member of a congregation is given a calling, or an opportunity to serve as a teacher, a leader, or some other role that can bless someone else. Quite often I have been given callings where I had no experience in that area beforehand. I have served as a scoutmaster, a choir director, a teacher, and numerous other callings. I have even served as a full-time missionary for two years. Each calling has provided me an opportunity to rely on God for help and become something that I wasn’t before. This has taken faith on my part, but has been well worth it. I have really enjoyed the different callings I have had.


Frequently Asked Questions

What are Mormon Temples Used For?

We consider the temple to be the House of the Lord. It is a special place of worship where members must prepare themselves spiritually in order to enter. It is also a place where we can feel the influence of the Holy Spirit without the distractions of the world.

Inside the temple we learn about God’s plan for His children and what we must do in order to live with Him again. Those who go to the temple do so to make promises to God, called covenants. They promise to be obedient to His commandments as a demonstration of their commitment to Him. In return, God promises His children blessings in this life and in the life to come.

These covenants are made during sacred ceremonies, called ordinances. One example is marriages that are performed not just until death, but for eternity, making it possible for families to be together forever. Without these covenants and ordinances, we cannot receive all the fullest blessings that God has prepared for His children.

While members of the church enter the temple to participate in these sacred ceremonies for themselves, they also return again and again to perform these ordinances vicariously in behalf of those who are deceased but may not have been able to enter a holy temple. For instance, someone who did not have the opportunity to be baptized during their lifetime may have the baptism performed for them so that they can choose whether or not to accept this work done in their behalf. This is the primary reason why members of the church research genealogy and their family history.

The temple happens to be my favorite place on earth. Whenever I need additional guidance in my life, or I desire to be closer to God, I go to the temple to worship and ponder solutions to my problems. When I go to the temple, I feel such a comforting, peaceful feeling that makes it easier for me to think about God and my relationship with Him. I love how I feel when I worship in the temple.


Personal Stories

Why/How do you share the gospel with your friends?

I love to share what I have learned with anyone who is interested. I have been given so many blessings by God, and I have been blessed by so many others who have been kind to me, I hope I can do something to share what I have been given. Most often this happens in conversation. "Hey, guess what happened to me? I just discovered the coolest thing! Would you like to come with me? I think you would enjoy this." The best way to share things that matter most is to share it with a friend.



For more information about Mormons and what they believe, or if you would like to create your own profile on why you are a Mormon, visit:
http://www.mormon.org/


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Pointing the Way

I think she was an angel, just a different sort. The woman had beautiful white hair and she was dressed completely in white to match. Were it not for the fact that I had just arrived at the temple, and that this is not an uncommon experience there, she might have given me enough reason to think she was a heavenly messenger. Instead, her life is still grounded by mortality and a desire to serve others.

Upon my entering the Salt Lake Temple, the woman in white greeted me. She stood waiting to point the way for me to go, wanting to make sure that my experience was as pleasant as possible. Though I have been to the temple many, many times and am quite familiar with finding my way, her presence provided a good reminder of what a difference one person can make in the experience of another. As I approached, she smiled and said hello. She made me feel welcome.

There are many who go to the temple for the first time, either to receive their own endowment, or because they have come from a far distance to visit a particular temple. Even in a place that is as holy and beautiful as a temple, one can feel a little disconcerted if he or she is not sure what to do or where to go. You may know that you are in the right place at the right time, but beyond that you might ask, “Now what?”

On any given visit to the temple, I may meet six or seven temple workers who are there just to greet me at various points. I have thought about how different my experience would be if they were not there. What would it feel like to be greeted by signs instead of a person? Would I feel more like a stranger in the Lord’s Holy House? Because the temple is the House of the Lord, signs are not enough. A house suggests hospitality. It is a place for family, friends, and warm welcomes. A home is a place of belonging.

As children of our Father in Heaven, we have all left our heavenly home for a time with the expectation of returning. In order to go back, we are required to demonstrate to Him that we really do want to – that we are willing to do anything to get there. While we are mere strangers here, this earth is intended to be our temporary home until we can again enter the presence of the Lord. It is the right place, and this is the right time to be tested. Though this is by design, signs from heaven may not be sufficient to make us feel welcome and comfortable for this earthly home that God has prepared for us. Someone who cares, standing at the crossroads of life’s decisions, can make all the difference in helping a fellow brother or sister to feel completely welcome.

Throughout my life there have been many individuals who have stood at the crossroads of my decisions, ready to greet me and offer some direction.
They have provided comfort just when it was needed most. Their experience has provided a sense of familiarity that I could not get on my own. Throughout my life I have relied heavily on my parents and family. My wife has supported me unlike anyone else in the world and has provided a spring of hope and encouragement. Close friends have been an invaluable blessing to me. At times when I have felt weakest, I have become much stronger as I have learned to depend on them. Those who are closest to me have greeted me with their hearts and have shaped who I have become. Without them, this life would not even closely resemble home.

There is great power in presence, and not just physical presence, but presence of heart and mind. Most often when I am going through a difficult change in my life, a friend may not be able to take the difficulty away. Doing so may actually defeat the purpose of being here on earth. The presence of a friend, however, seems to distribute the load that I carry in a way that is more bearable. It helps me to feel that I am not alone and allows me to focus on what I am supposed to learn instead of the difficulty of the moment.

Another presence that has shaped my decisions is that of the Holy Ghost. Similarly, the Holy Ghost won’t take away my challenges, but He will bring me comfort. His presence strengthens me. It inspires me to do great things. He helps me to believe that I can, and then He reminds me that I did, so I will have the faith to do it again.

Some of the most influential moments in my life have come when I have experienced the combined presence of those pointing the way – when I feel the warmth of those who are closest to me along with the presence of the Holy Ghost. The presence of God seems to cement any relationship. It amplifies and enriches. If a friend can do much to bring comfort, then a friend who brings the spirit with them can work miracles, and all just because of presence.

In life there are individuals, and even organizations, that are willing to point a direction, but they point the wrong way. Instead of pointing towards the happiness that comes from restraint and discipline, they are busy directing traffic towards selfish motives and gainful employment for the adversary. Occasionally, this comes from those who are well-intended and are not meaning to distract me. As comforting as it is to have the presence of friends, I am quick to see what friends they bring with them. Do they bring the spirit with them? Do they take the Holy Spirit as their guide? While a friend may not be able to receive revelation for me, I can judge the power of their presence by what I feel, and by how much I feel the power of the Holy Ghost.

There are individuals who do have the authority to receive revelation for me. I will never forget that my parents will always have that stewardship, and that I will do well to honor them in righteousness. Additionally, local priesthood leaders who hold priesthood keys have been called of God to guide me and point the way. I honor and respect them as I do my own parents. While neither my leaders nor my parents are perfect, I can judge the power of their presence by what I feel.

In a week from now, I will have the opportunity to be taught by other friends, most of whom I have not met. I call them friends because I feel they sincerely have my personal interests at heart. I have found them to be unwavering in their efforts to lead me to faith in Jesus Christ. They have been diligent in helping me to return to my home with Father. They are consistent in helping me to feel the Spirit of the Lord. These friends provide me good counsel and direction that enable me to make good decisions.

God speaks to living prophets today. They hear His voice in much the same way I do when I receive answers to my prayers. They hear His voice through the gentle promptings of the Holy Ghost. The presence of the comforter directs them to teach the things that Father wants us to be taught. That presence also confirms the truth of what we hear in our hearts.

The prophet Nephi taught that the will of God is “manifest unto the prophet by the voice of the Spirit; for by the Spirit are all things made known unto the prophets, which shall come upon the children of men according to the flesh… both temporal and spiritual….” (1 Nephi 22:2-3) Further he taught, “when a man speaketh by the power of the Holy Ghost the power of the Holy Ghost carrieth it unto the hearts of the children of men.” (2 Nephi 33:1)

The Lord also revealed to Joseph Smith, “Verily I say unto you, he that is ordained of me and sent forth to preach the word of truth by the Comforter, in the Spirit of truth, doth he preach it by the Spirit of truth or some other way? And if it be by some other way it is not of God. Therefore, why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth? Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together.” (Doctrine & Covenants 50:17-22)

What a blessing it is to receive personal revelation and learn how to communicate with God. What a gift it is to receive the Holy Ghost by receiving revelation.

During the times where we still feel alone, Father places others in our lives who can stand at the crossroads of difficult experiences. He provides family and friends who can help point the way. Their presence combined with the presence of the Holy Ghost can restore our faith and secure our hope. The signs of the second coming are increasing, but they may not be sufficient to bring us all the comfort we need. It is when I put my faith in those whom God has called to testify to His children that I find lasting peace. As I listen and affirm my willingness to yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, I find the strength to do the most difficult things. It is after those moments of trial, whether clear or ambiguous, that the confirming feeling of peace settles in my heart that Jesus lives and He will come again.

If you have not had a chance to listen to the words of living prophets and apostles, I invite you to join with me this next weekend in the General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to hear their words and judge for yourself the direction that they point. If you have listened to them before, then I invite you to listen again and again, and seek the confirming voice of the Holy Spirit that what they say is true.

I add my witness that God speaks to His children today. I know His servants the prophets speak His will. These are heavenly messengers, grounded to mortality through their service. As I listen to the Holy Spirit and follow, there is a peace that fills my heart unlike any other.

I am grateful for family, friends, and dearest loved ones who have been there for me during difficult times. They are the angels in my life who have pointed the way. You know who you are. Thank you!


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Someone To Talk To

Having a friend to talk with can be a wonderful gift when you are going through a difficult trial. Quite often, it’s nice just to have someone who will simply listen so you don’t feel alone. Many of life’s difficulties become much easier to bear when there is someone else who is at least aware of what you are going through. Their prayers can make a big difference in helping to bear your burdens.

Just prior to the Savior’s most lonely moments, he met with his beloved apostles for the Last Supper. He knew the magnitude of the burden He would have to bear, and he chose to be with those who were closest to Him. There he called them “friends,” and said, “Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you….” (John 15:14-16) What a beautiful thing it is that Jesus would trust and confide in those who could give Him strength in his trials. I can think of no greater compliment than for the Lord to acknowledge me as His friend. I can only hope that someday I will have lived worthy enough to have such a privilege.

As the evening went on, Jesus described the difficulties that He would shortly face. He also told His apostles the difficulties they would face as His friends. Yet He promised them a gift for loving Him. “And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; Even the Spirit of truth … for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you. … Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:16-17, 27) Being a friend to Jesus is not an easy thing. It is sure to be difficult. During times of loneliness when our burdens seem greater than we can bear, I am grateful that He has promised to help us.

Recently, I experienced a difficult trial that weighed heavily on my heart. I felt that I was again riding upon the waves of a raging tempest, and the ups and downs seemed too hard to bear. What seemed worse was that I experienced a moment of ambiguity where I hoped to feel the influence of the Holy Spirit and did not. That influence had not left me, but I didn’t feel the clear direction that I had prayed for. Instead, I felt distance. I also found it very interesting that I did feel the promptings of the Holy Spirit in other matters, just not in that particular one. I believe I was being tested to see what I would do on my own.

I reflected on what Jesus did after the Last Supper as He went with His disciples to the Garden of Gethsemane. There he asked Peter, James, and John to watch and pray with Him. Sadly, in His time of need, they were not able to stay awake. Their own trials were bearing down on them and they could do nothing to help Him. It was in that moment of loneliness that Jesus called upon His Father in prayer and was strengthened by an angel who visited Him. Sometimes, when I need someone to talk to, and it seems there is nowhere else to turn, Father is always waiting to listen. I believe He gives us difficult experiences where no one else seems able to help because it causes us to turn to Him.

Earlier this year, I experienced similar trials where the ups and downs seemed unbearable. At times they felt like a rollercoaster of seismic activity. As that trial seemed to conclude I remember having the impression that the ups and downs of the previous year were just preparing me for another seismic event. I was being prepared for the next lesson. As I experienced a new set of ups and downs, I asked myself, “Is this it? Is this the culminating point of that impression?” I believe so. Remembering the impression didn’t take away the burden, but it did help to see that the Lord’s hand was in it and that I shouldn’t despair.

In the midst of the ups and downs, I found that I had emotional swings where I seemed to feel the spirit very clearly, alternating with moments of doubt and fog. On one particular morning a few weeks ago, there was an amazing thunder storm outside. I usually enjoy a good storm, but this time I felt different. Instead I felt great discouragement and despair. Things seemed very dark. I even felt as though I was encompassed about by the adversary, and I was troubled.

The next day I was still pondering the questions that had been on my mind, hoping for some answers. I ached. Before going to work, I stopped by a nearby cemetery to think and pray. That particular cemetery has been a good place for me to go when I need a few minutes of solitude – a place where I can eliminate distractions. I still felt confused about my direction. At times things seemed so clear, and then they would go foggy and not make as much sense. I was frustrated that I felt so distant from the spirit on this matter, that I was not receiving any revelation. That is when I began to pray.

As I sat in my car, I pled with Father to let me hear His voice again, or rather to have that familiar feeling that I am used to when I communicate with Him. I needed someone to talk to. As I did so, I felt the peace I was seeking return to my heart. I also had a reaffirmation that Father does hear and answer prayers.

I decided to test the pattern for receiving revelation, namely to study an issue out in my mind, come to a decision as to what was right, and then wait for the confirmation of the Holy Spirit. (Doctrine & Covenants 9:8) It is a simple process with many applications. Having faith in Jesus Christ is not just believing that He lived and that He will come again, it also includes having faith that what He said is true – true enough that it will work for me. This is what happened in my circumstance.

Pleading with Father, I asked a few questions and received some real time answers. It wasn’t like an audible voice. It was a very subtle feeling that I can never feel unless I am truly honest with myself and I have intent to learn and follow. The answers came as I asked the questions, tried to think what the correct answers might be, and then waited for the familiar feeling of the spirit to confirm or refute my thoughts.

In order to receive answers to prayer, I believe that the person praying has to believe, or at least have a hope, that Father does hear and answer prayers. He does so line upon line, and precept upon precept. This means that I may not receive the answers that I expect, but He will tell me just enough of what I need to know in order to complete my test.

As I asked my first question, “Am I wrong in my intent?” I thought in my mind that the answer was no. At the same time I felt the confirming peace in my heart that the impression was correct. I would have been uncertain had it not been for the familiarity of that peaceful feeling – a feeling that always comes when the Spirit of the Lord is near.

I then asked my second question, “Is my current course the right direction to continue in?” In my mind I thought yes, which again was confirmed by that peaceful feeling that comes from the Comforter. When I asked my third question, “Will my trial ever change?” I had a different thought that equated to, “John, that’s not for you to know right now. Be patient.” This, too, was accompanied by that familiar feeling. It wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear, but I knew it was right in my heart. It didn’t come in the form of words, but as I felt the meaning in the impression, those were the words that seemed most appropriate to dress the meaning in. As I did so, the Holy Ghost confirmed that the feeling was correct.

Two additional questions were answered for me that helped me to feel better about the moments of clarity I had felt before. When I felt surrounded by fog and despair, it was easy to question those moments of clarity and doubt that my prayers had really been answered. Some of the questions were difficult to ask, because I believed I would get an answer I didn’t want. I did, but I had to know. I needed to feel like I could progress again. There are a lot of things I have wanted in my life, but above all, when I have tried to make the right choice, things have always worked out for the best. Though I didn’t receive all the answers I wanted, and some of the answers were not what I had hoped for, my faith was enlarged by the fact that I needed someone to talk to, and Father heard.

There is a verse of scripture that is very familiar to me, and definitely a foundation for my faith. The apostle James taught, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.” (James 1:5-6)

In order to overcome my own tempest-tossed emotions, I had to stabilize my faith first, and put my trust in God. For me, that meant that I had to be willing to do whatever He wants me to do. If I can be completely honest with myself in that regard, then He can be honest with me.

Not all answers to prayer come instantaneously. Mine came after months of prayer, work, and pondering. Some take more time than others, and usually this has more to do with my own understanding. When I don’t get answers to the questions I ask in prayer, I try to examine why. If God reveals things to us line upon line, am I asking for an answer that requires me to skip several lines? Is there is a simpler question that is more pertinent to my current circumstance? If I can’t have the answer to why, then maybe I can at least get an answer to what I should do right now. Asking, “What would Thou have me do?” can help me sift through what I want in order to discover what God wants for me at that moment.

God’s purpose in testing us is to help us. So often it seems that needed help comes when I am about to give up but choose to hold on a little longer and rely on my faith. That’s when I receive my witness.

By the end of that day, other events occurred that were an answer to my morning prayer, as well as months of prayer. My trial had come to an end, or at least that part of my lesson was complete. I am sure I am only being prepared for the next test whenever it may be. But this much I know, each of us is given trials to test our faith. If it is my faith that is being tested, then it is my faith that I should apply as quickly as possible. Any delay that I exhibit may prolong my trial. But when I turn my heart to Father, I know that He hears and answers prayers.

Most importantly, I have again learned one of the many ways that Father will answer prayers. If we have the faith to study out a question and come to the best answer possible, He will send the Comforter to let us know if the path we are on is correct. Though we may each feel the Holy Spirit in a different way, the pattern is promised. We need not endure our own Gethsemane to be assured that God lives and that He hears and answers prayers. When we need someone to talk to, He is always listening.


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

What's the Difference?

Marriage was the main topic du jour recently as I sat in a small park with a friend. We had found a comfortable place to discuss an aspect that is sometimes a little uncomfortable. He described the memories he was happiest with in his marriage, as well as parts that were troubling. Most of these were needs-based. Sounds like most marriages, right? Occasionally the sweet is mixed with a little bitter? As he talked about his interests, and how he and his wife differed on several points, I recognized some familiar themes.

This conversation caused me to reflect on an old TV commercial from my childhood. A well known soft drink company advertised a simple taste test to help sell their product. The comparison of two different drinks required a taster to determine which drink was preferred based on taste alone. Though one drink may have tasted better than the other, I think the commercial was a bit biased as it highlighted the results favoring the soft drink paying for the commercial. Though expected, the bias is not very helpful if you are trying to improve a marriage. It’s really helpful to have both perspectives.

While I feel I have a great marriage, Liz and I also have some differences that are pretty common in most marital relationships. When taste testing our personal differences, I find that some of our differences taste good and some don’t. Many of our differences are so small it’s hard to tell the difference at all. We simply have the same taste, or you might say we just have a lot in common. Most of the time, this works to our advantage.

In a few cases, our personality traits are so varied that the differences are stark. If we are not careful, these differences can result in a contest to see which trait tastes better, or which one will come out as a dominant factor in making decisions for the two of us. I like to think that we take turns winning, or conceding, but you’ll have to confirm that with Liz. So I ask myself, if some differences are good and some are not, what’s the difference? I think the answer is worth digging a little deeper for. There is a difference between our differences and the way we perceive them.

As I look at my relationship with my wife, I find that our strengths are quite often weaknesses, too. In reality, they are just traits that define who we are, each one with its own set of pros and cons. For example, Liz and I are both quite methodical and organized, which makes us very compatible as we solve problems together. Yet when we look at the detail of how we approach a problem, our differences become more apparent. Liz tends to be more logical and rational. I tend to be more intuitive. I’ve noticed that these personality traits also affect how we react to circumstances when our needs aren’t met. We each get grumpy, jealous, and dissatisfied for different reasons. Quite often, Liz’s reasons are more logical and mine are more emotional. How’s that for a stereotypical gender switch? If we are not careful, it is easy to miss each other’s needs because they are different than our own.

No matter how similar we are, or how similar our needs are, we are still different people with different experiences. Our roles, activities, and choices shape who we are as well as our needs. In addition to eating and sleeping, we each have interests that fuel us and give us energy. Finding room in our lives for some of these things is in keeping with the Thirteenth Article of Faith. “If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” (The Articles of Faith 1:13) I believe there is a lot of latitude here for personal interests.

While Liz and I spend time together, more regularly in the early morning and in the evening, our focus during the daytime is often quite different. Liz has a degree in Elementary Ed and spends more time volunteering in our children’s school classes. She takes a greater role in their education and extra curricular activities than I do. My background, on the other hand, is in art and design and I spend most of my time during the day developing architectural designs for various buildings.

As might be expected, many of our personal interests are related to the things we do most during the daytime. Liz enjoys sewing and is an excellent seamstress. She also loves scrapbooking. In my spare time, I find other creative outlets such as fine art and music. I also love running. While there are similarities to our favorite pastimes, and we are both project-oriented individuals, our projects and interests are often very different. As we gain more and more experience in our interests over time, it would seem that our interests could take us further and further apart. Yikes!

These simple differences can seem much greater when a couple fails to understand each other’s needs, especially those deeper than pastimes. I recently spoke with a couple who was having some challenges in their marriage. One was looking for more of an intellectual and emotional connection. The other was craving more expression of love through touch and affection. The couple had a difficult time relating to each other and their differences were growing. Sadly, neither of the two understood the other’s needs well enough to help. They were only getting one perspective on the taste test.

I find it interesting that the adage, “opposites attract,” is often true, but not always. There are enough instances to prove otherwise. Some opposites such as gender are very attractive. We each have talents and experience that compliment each other, which in turn enriches a relationship. On the other hand, differences such as work ethic, spending habits, and favorite pastimes may detract from and even divide a relationship, especially if they are not managed.

Whether you have a fairly strong marriage or one that is feeling pretty rocky, taking a closer look at differences in marriage can make all the difference in how you perceive your relationship. Expecting a mixture of similarities and differences is not only healthy, it’s realistic. It’s important to note that some differences are attractive and some are divisive. Some are complimentary and some are competing. But it’s not the difference alone that makes the difference. There is something about similarities and differences that make them positive or negative.

Beyond similarities and differences lies a deeper issue, namely, attraction. If we are attracted to a similarity or difference, we move closer to it. As this happens we are more likely to adopt and become like the trait that attracts us. What makes some traits attractive and others not? What type of incentives does it take to make a stronger relationship? An obvious conclusion is a clear benefit.

Quite often we see differences as good when there is a potential for some gain or opportunity. I can’t say I know anyone who develops a friendship so they can experience loss, or gets married so they can be miserable. Most relationships are based on some mutual benefit. In a marriage I believe the benefit needs to go both ways. The benefit may not need to be the same, but it should be mutual and proportionate.

Similarities are attractive for obvious reasons. Finding someone who thinks like you, acts like you, and feels like you is very validating. It feels good to know that someone else can relate. I don’t feel lonely or isolated when someone else thinks like I do. It adds strength to my resolve and passion to my interests. In this case, the greater the similarities, the greater the attraction.

Differences can be attractive for similar reasons. Finding someone who thinks like you, but knows more than you, can be uplifting and encouraging. Sharing with someone who thinks like you, but has found a different way to express it, can be inspiring. I am grateful for friends who can do more than I can when they are willing to teach me a new skill. I am enthused by others who can do something I can’t when I can also see the opportunity for personal growth.

When I am fearful of differences, it is usually for selfish reasons, or because I am feeling a need to be protective. Finding someone who thinks like I do, and who has the potential to take something I have worked hard for, can be terrifying. Sharing my opportunities with someone who may use them against me is threatening. I am leery of differences that could result in undesirable change or loss.

I also believe there are times we should be fearful of differences in marriage. These instances have everything to do with the heart and intent. Differences of themselves are nothing. It is only what we make of the differences or what we do with them that makes them good or bad. If a difference in interest, opinion, or want gains enough importance that my marriage relationship begins to decrease in priority then I am on dangerous ground. Such differences create unnecessary distance between a married couple. As that distance increases it becomes harder and harder to repair; thus the council from the Lord to love and cleave unto your spouse and none else. (Doctrine & Covenants 42:22)

The safest way I have determined to evaluate differences in marriage is to ask a few simple questions. Will this difference make me a better person? Am I being selfish, or is this something that will help me to accomplish more good? Will this difference strengthen my marriage or weaken it? Does my spouse agree with me?

Earlier I suggested that there is a difference between our differences and the way we perceive them. Understanding this can help us to manage all of our differences in marriage. As I have looked closer, here is what I have found:

• We each decide whether differences will be attractive or divisive. It is a personal choice. No one decides that for us.
• Differences can be managed with mutual understanding and cooperation. Both spouses can shape whether or not their differences will be divisive by having a common focus. Making sure that each other remains the primary focus in the relationship, and not their differences, will help increase their unity.
• Taste is a personal preference, and our taste can change. Some differences can be an acquired taste. Trying to understand our spouse’s perspective gives us a taste of who they really are. We don’t have to swallow everything, but a taste of something else that is good might open our hearts as well as our minds, especially when it comes to understanding each other’s needs.
• Differences are less dangerous when we are less selfish. The more I can move the focus from me to we, and still have my basic needs met, the more I become like the Savior.
• Overcoming our differences can be different than overcoming weaknesses. We may not need to get rid of our differences to overcome them. When we struggle to work through our differences, and we feel that we are making no progress, Father in Heaven is always willing to help if we turn to Him in prayer. This works best when we first turn our hearts.

There is one crowning principle pertaining to differences that will help us become more like the Savior. We are all members in the body of Christ. We have differences that make us stronger. The key is to make sure that our covenant relationships stay intact and preeminent.

The apostle Paul taught, “For as the body is one, and hath many members, and all the members of that one body, being many, are one body: so also is Christ. … For the body is not one member, but many. … And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? … But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. And if they were all one member, where were the body? But now are they many members, yet but one body. … God hath tempered the body together, having given more abundant honour to that part which lacked: That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another. And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it. Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular.” (1 Corinthians 12:12-27) Paul then talks about gifts of the spirit, and of charity.

The Lord also revealed, concerning His gifts, "that ye may not be deceived seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given; For verily I say unto you, they are given for the benefit of those who love me and keep all my commandments, and him that seeketh so to do; that all may be benefited that seek or that ask of me, that ask and not for a sign that they may consume it upon their lusts. And again, verily I say unto you, I would that ye should always remember, and always retain in your minds what those gifts are, that are given unto the church. For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God. To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby. ... He that asketh in the Spirit asketh according to the will of God; wherefore it is done even as he asketh. And again, I say unto you, all things must be done in the name of Christ, whatsoever you do in the Spirit; And ye must give thanks unto God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with." (Doctrine & Covenants 46:8-12, 30-32)

Jesus is our head. As we take direction from Him, He will lead us back to the Father. If we are honest in our efforts to do so, the Holy Ghost will teach us how. The Holy Ghost will also sanctify our hearts and remove the impurities that make us selfish if we will yield to His enticings. As we choose to honor our covenants, and honor our spouses whom we have made those covenants with, then we will learn how to make our differences become attractive. We will find that we have more in common then than we did before.

Understanding these principles is a lot different than understanding our differences in marriage. For those seeking a celestial marriage, we should expect to be tested in all things, even in matters of taste. There is a difference between being one and being the same. I’m much happier when I understand the difference.


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Sticks, Balloons, and Hang Man

This morning I compared two different messages presented in sacrament meeting as I sat in church with my family. The first came from the pulpit. A member of the high council had been asked to address the topic of “What would Jesus do?” The second message was being delivered simultaneously by my oldest son and oldest daughter who were sitting just to my right. Together they were irritating each other by drawing stick figures on the back of the folded meeting program. Oddly, the graphic representation looked nothing like the message from the pulpit. Yeah, big surprise, I know. Welcome to parenting.

I’m not exactly sure of the sequence of events that escalated the family feud on a pew, but from what I am able to reconstruct, it happened like this. My daughter asked my wife for a pen so she could keep herself entertained after the sacrament had been passed. Having received said pen, or weapon as it were, she began to draw. Seeing that my daughter was having a good time, my son thought he would contribute some of his own creativity to her illustration of what I thought was an interesting and well delivered message from the assigned speaker. I suspect that my son may have briefly commandeered both the paper and the pen to make his move.

I observed as one stick figure was added to the other and the two figures began to have a conversation. Remarks were ballooned adjacent to their heads like you would see in a comic strip. A nice volley developed as balloons began to fill the page and I could tell there was a little heat coming from the paper. Well, he said this and she said that, and before you know it, someone had a weapon. I don’t know if the potato gun came first or if it followed another weapon of choice, but shortly after the exchange went from words to weapons, there were a large number of other stick figures who appeared on the scene. The new mob, which appeared to have been drawn by my son, led to cartoonish cannons and shoulder mounted fire arms that resembled bazookas. A few more remarks were ballooned on the page, and then some of the remarks escaped the drawing and came from the author’s mouths. Those balloons weren’t so visible, but their emotions were. “Hmmm,” I thought. This is interesting.

I don’t know that either of my children was necessarily guilty or innocent. They just were. They were my children and they did what siblings do best – they annoyed each other relentlessly. “Nice,” I thought. Here I am being inspired and the two of you are blowing each other up.

The little feud drew to a close as my daughter, bound and determined not to be outsmarted by her older brother, was fired upon by her father. She had just drawn an even larger cannon with two more stick figures. The figure at whom the cannon was pointed at was labeled as my son. The figure adjacent to the lit fuse was labeled so that I knew it was her. I could tell that the look on her face was not deliberately maniacal, but it was the look of, “Now I’ve got you! Take that!!” That’s when I asked if I could see the folded paper and I added a third label. I simply wrote, “Jesus,” off to the side and handed it back to her.

My daughter’s expression of accomplishment deflated like a balloon without any remarks left to hold the air in. She’s pretty bright and she got the message without me having to add another balloon. She sagged a little and then started to repair things. Before the cannon had a chance to fire at said brother and recipient of focused animosity, she intervened and protected his stick figure by building a wall in front of him. She then cut the fuse to the cannon with a pair of newly drawn scissors. In a manner of speaking, she saved the day. Having three people in the picture made all the difference, at least for her.

I don’t know that either she or her brother had listened to much of the talk, but she and the speaker came to the same conclusion – when we keep Jesus in our lives it affects all of our decisions and leads us to greater happiness. If we let Him, He will show us to a better way. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)

This little exchange led me to think of another lonely, solitary stick figure of a man. I am thinking specifically of a simple game of hang man. Perhaps I assume too much if I believe that most people reading this post have played this game at some point, likely when a beloved Primary teacher or Sunday School teacher was absent and another poor, unsuspecting soul was asked to substitute at the last minute. How many times have you been in such a position and had to punt for a lesson, hmmm? Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me. All the same, the poor little guy who is the object of the game did nothing more than you by showing up to class, and yet he becomes a victim of a unique type of abuse, namely a lack of communication.

In case you haven’t ever had to punt for a lesson, and you have not yet felt the magic of relating to this nostalgic example, let me briefly sum up the rules of the game. One person has something on their mind. In an attempt to be obvious, they give a clue that “something is up” by drawing a hangman’s noose and by drawing a line. In reality, they draw several lines that represent the letters of a word that they are thinking. That is the signal that they game has begun. Then it is the job for the other person, or persons, to guess what is on the mind of the person who provided the noose. Correct guesses allow appropriate letters to be filled in above the lines, saving our little bystander for another round. Incorrect guesses send our little friend in a sticky situation to the gallows where he his hung because someone couldn’t guess what someone else was thinking. Great game don’t you think?

How often do we draw a line on the ground, taking a position of defense, and then expect the person we are having a disagreement with to discern what we are thinking without any additional information. “Someone is going to hang for this, and it’s not going to be me,” is something that goes unsaid but seems to be implied when we play this game. It is also often followed by mobs and weapons, even if only on the stage in our minds.

A close friend of mine said she prefers not to play these kind of games. “No subtexts, please. If there is something you want to tell me, just say it. I don’t want to guess.” Knowing this type of openness was welcome helped me to be even more honest than I was before. I have tried to apply this principle in every aspect of my life, and I am finding it works.

In light of these examples, another set of stick figures comes to mind. They are everywhere. Perhaps you have seen them most recently traveling on the rear of a vehicle with tinted glass. Usually there are two larger stick figures positioned on the rear window that represent a mom and a dad. Then there are a varying number of smaller figures that follow which often represent children. I have also seen a number of dogs join the procession, and one car that had several bicycles that followed. To each, his or her own, I guess. The point that I would like to make is that the stick figures all seem to be happy. No one is firing cannons or bazookas. No one is getting hung. For some reason, everyone on the rear of the vehicle seems to be onboard with the idea that a family is a pretty great place to be. Life is good.

Within my own stick figure experience, I find that I am happiest when I get one thing right. It’s when I put the sticks down and increase the balloons that I am happiest. Open communication always makes things better for me. It isn’t meant to be a game as much as it is a gift. Open-fire with a bazooka does very little to make me feel good, even if it is as harmless as a few remarks on paper. When I choose to hold back information that could help resolve hurt feelings, I am really setting someone else up for a game of hang man (may he rest in peace) and that’s just not fair. However, when I choose to fill my balloons with honesty and a willingness to work things out, that’s when I remember that Jesus is there on the sidelines, not only as a referee, but as my coach. He is always willing to show me a better way if I am willing to let Him.

So why is it that, like this morning, a sermon can be delivered to me directly, and yet I have to learn the hard way by playing cruel games? Not sure. But I’m starting to figure things out, and I like how it feels. I like the feeling of peace and accomplishment when I face my fears and communicate how I am feeling to resolve my concerns. All I need is the right kind of balloons. No weapons are required – no heat, no noose – just enough faith to overcome my differences.


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