Pleasure Central

Today happens to be a unique occurrence where the calendar resembles a slot machine in any of a large number of Las Vegas casinos. When written numerically, today’s date appears as 10-10-10. JACKPOT!! Right? Well, even if the numbers line up for someone on a slot machine, I’m not sure that is the best indicator of whether or not they are winning where it counts. It may be a small moment of achievement for the winner when certain bells ka-ching and lights bling, but what do these signals really mean?

Friends who have been in a casino when someone has won a jackpot have described what they saw. Not being an eye-witness, I’ll have to take their word for it. Perhaps you can correct me if your experience has been different. What I have been told is that casino representatives were quickly on the scene when a slot machine announced a winner. The machine was secured and checked to make sure that the person who supplied the winning coin didn’t win by deceptive means. There was even a level of doubt about the character of the winner, as if they had committed a crime by winning. Whether or not you like to gamble is not my focus today. However, I find it fascinating that a casino representative might be more concerned about validity of a small moment of pleasure than the one who is the supposed beneficiary.

We are surrounded by an endless number of voices that labor to persuade our attentions. Some of them ka-ching and bling, and others come as sharp warnings. The same voice may be pleasing on one occasion, and painful to hear on another. To me, this suggests an important principle about discernment. How good I feel about a particular voice may not be the best indicator of whether it is right or not.

A week ago in General Conference, I heard Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles talk about lures, addictions, and pleasure. This topic has been on my mind since, especially as it relates to voices. As he spoke of addictions he said, “According to the dictionary, addiction of any kind means to surrender to something, thus relinquishing agency and becoming dependent on some life-destroying substance or behavior.” This intrigues me – the fact that certain behaviors can cause us to relinquish our ability to choose, and perhaps even recognize.

He continues, “Researchers tell us there is a mechanism in our brain called the pleasure center. When activated by certain drugs or behaviors, it overpowers the part of our brain that governs our willpower, judgment, logic, and morality. This leads the addict to abandon what he or she knows is right.”

So I wonder, “How is it that the human body can be such a divine gift and yet have inclinations that can be so self-destructive? How is it that our own internal voice can be so difficult as to discern whether it is right or not?” I believe the answer was given by King Benjamin in a discourse to his people.

“For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, … willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” (Mosiah 3:19)

Though they appear as opposites, I don’t think it is a coincidence that the actions described by Elder Ballard are so similar to those taught by King Benjamin. Elder Ballard cautioned against surrendering to something that requires us to relinquish agency. King Benjamin encouraged his people to yield and surrender, even submit their will to God. It is not the act of surrender or submission that is good or bad. It is what we accomplish by doing so. Surrendering our will so we can make fewer choices is a damning principle. It stops our progression. Surrendering our will so we can make better choices, returns our will to us in better condition than when we gave it away. In this, the Lord is able to purify our hearts so that we have less desire to sin until, eventually, the desire to sin is gone altogether.

King Benjamin also described an important part about the voice of our souls that comes from within. It is in our natures, particularly because of the needs of the human body, that our desires make us enemies to God. It’s not that we desire to fight him, but our bodies have divinely given desires that must be controlled. And, unless we listen to God, we can easily become pleasure-centric.

In his second letter to Timothy, the apostle Paul warned “that in the last days perilous times shall come,” and that men would be “lovers of their own selves” and “lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God.” (2 Timothy 3:1-4) In this sense, pleasure becomes a more inconspicuous form of idolatry where we choose something else to have greater priority in our lives than the true and living God. When desire is shrouded in the secrecy of our hearts, pleasure becomes the invisible focus of our worship. In that moment, pleasure becomes our God.

The researchers that Elder Ballard quoted further describe the important role of pleasure in our lives. Addressing the pleasure center in the brain, the researchers indicated that our “brains are wired to ensure that we will repeat life-sustaining activities by associating those activities with pleasure or reward. Whenever this reward circuit is activated, the brain notes that something important is happening that needs to be remembered, and teaches us to do it again and again, without thinking about it.” (Drugs, Brains, and Behavior – The Science of Addiction, NIDA, p. 18) If what these researchers have indicated is true, pleasure can be a powerful influence, regardless of whether good or bad.

References in scripture seem to indicate that pleasure is neither evidence of right nor wrong. It is merely a condition. Instead, pleasure is associated with both. “The Lord taketh pleasure in them that fear him….” (Psalms 147:11) When we are willing to put God first and temporarily give up the things that our bodies may need, then we will find pleasure in the day of our fasting. (Isaiah 58:3) This suggests that we may find greater pleasure by occasionally abstaining. The opposite is also true. “He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man,” (Proverbs 21:17) and, “she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth.” (1 Timothy 5:6) The prophet Jacob taught, “Remember, to be carnally-minded is death, and to be spiritually-minded is life eternal.” (2 Nephi 9:39)

The body alone is not capable of distinguishing between right and wrong. It does not recognize methods the way it does results. If a person is hungry, the body knows when it is fed and the need is met, but it does not care how the need was met. The body does not know if the food was a gift or if it was stolen. It does, however, acknowledge pleasure. When a need is met, the body experiences feelings of pleasure which teach us to repeat the action again and again. Herein lays a potential danger. Unless we understand what pleasure is and how it can help us, we can set ourselves up for unpleasurable experiences later on.

Too often, we allow ourselves to be deceived with regard to pleasure. If we do something we either know is wrong, or at least acknowledge that there is a possibility of being wrong, and then feel pleasure because a need was met, the body attempts to reinforce that behavior. Most often, this feeling of pleasure makes us feel very good. Bells ka-ching and lights start to bling, indicating that we have won the jackpot. At least that is what the carnally-centered body thinks. The best defense to being deceived is to be spiritually-centered instead. Deceiving ourselves with positive reinforcement for behavior that is not good makes it harder and harder to recognize and accept truth. It also makes it more difficult to repent, having convinced ourselves that we are not in error.

Because the body doesn’t acknowledge the methods by which our needs are met, pleasure alone is not a good indicator if something is right or not. It may indicate that the result is right, but it doesn’t justify intent. That requires the spirit. It is by the Spirit that we are justified. (Moses 6:60) When our bodies tell us that an action or decision is right and our spirits tell us the opposite, we are left feeling conflicted. Internally we experience chaos which remains until we can resolve our feelings and make them feel at one.

If we listen to our bodies and ignore our spirits, then the Holy Spirit will withdraw His help and influence, leaving us to our own persuasions. When this happens, we truly become an enemy to God. If instead we listen to our spirits when we receive spiritual promptings and we override the potential temptations of pleasure, we learn restraint and we keep ourselves from being deceived.

Because the soul is comprised of the spirit and the body, we can’t find true happiness by only listening to half of the story. Pleasure is only half of the equation that equals lasting happiness. If you can find pleasure and keep the influence of the Holy Spirit as a constant companion, then you will find the peace that comes by living a life that is consistent with truth. When we master our bodies, and our spirits and our bodies work together, it is then that we become more like God. We shouldn’t confuse the joy of the spirit with the pleasure of the body. It is important to learn the difference. They can be congruent, but are often not.

There is too much at stake to gamble with our salvation by trusting in pleasure alone. Pleasure can lead us to lasting happiness if it reinforces good behavior. When it reinforces bad behavior, it will lead us in the wrong direction. The numbers might line up if we are lucky, but that only works well in a casino. If our bodies truly are temples, then we need to make sure that they remain a place where our spirits can choose freely without deception. We need to be able to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit. Instead of reducing pleasure, this will allow us to experience more pleasure without the guilt. With a dose of restraint, we can learn to choose the will of God over a pleasure-centric life.


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How Long Shall I Suffer?

Mormon’s admonition to pray for charity with all energy of heart has been on my mind a lot lately. He understood a principle I feel I am just beginning to understand. While there are many good things we can do in life, there is only one way to return to our Father’s presence, and that is through His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ. As we live the way He lived, as we choose to do what He did, we become like Him. We become pure.

The gift of charity, or the pure love of Christ, is described as the greatest of all the gifts of God. It is the gift that will lead us to eternal life. While this gift cannot be purchased with money or be received by giving our excess to a charitable organization, the gift comes with a heavy price. The amount is the cost of a single heart offered to the Lord – mine.

The prophet Mormon described this cost to his people. “And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” (Moroni 7:45)

In the scriptures the word, “suffer,” has two meanings that are related but different. One meaning is to endure pain, distress, loss, separation, or even death. King Benjamin described the suffering that Jesus would endure for our sakes in similar terms. “And lo, he shall suffer temptations, and pain of body, hunger, thirst, and fatigue, even more than man can suffer, except it be unto death; for behold, blood cometh from every pore, so great shall be his anguish for the wickedness and the abominations of his people.” (Mosiah 3:7)

This type of suffering describes all experiences that are difficult and unpleasant. It is usually associated with pain that is either physical, or emotional. Some pain that we feel may only be temporary and fleeting. Pain can also be severe enough that it causes damage and leaves a mark. I find great comfort knowing the atoning sacrifice Jesus made for all mankind will take away our pain and heal our marks. He has made it possible to find hope.

The second meaning of the word, “suffer,” can be found in the New Testament. As a group of people brought their children to be blessed by Jesus, His disciples rebuked them. Jesus’ reply to His disciples was, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.” (Mark 10:14) The account of this story does not describe the experience of having young children come to Him as difficult or unpleasant. In fact, it was something that Jesus wanted. In this context the word, “suffer,” means to allow or permit.

As I consider these two meanings in relation to the cost of charity, I am left wondering how they relate. Suffering alone does not equate to love. Merely allowing unpleasant things does not guarantee us greater love, either. However, if I take both meanings and I add them to a common purpose, I get a different result. If I am willing to endure difficult trials and allow Father to direct my life because I trust Him, it may not be pleasant, but in the larger picture I can count on Him to make my life better. When I do hard things out of love, my love increases and my capacity to love increases.

Suffering can often teach us lessons we wouldn’t learn any other way. Paul in his letter to the Hebrews describes the prophet Melchizedek who offered “strong crying and tears” with his prayers that God would save him from death. Little more is known about his experience except that he learned “obedience by the things which he suffered.” (Hebrews 5:6-8) Melchizedek was a man of great faith, but that too came with a cost.

At the beginning of His ministry, Jesus went into the wilderness to pray. “And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights and had communed with God, he was afterward an hungered and was left to be tempted of the devil.” (JST Matthew 4:2) I find it interesting that Jesus was doing something good and was rewarded with a trial. That is how it may look from the first appearance, anyway. Instead, consider that Jesus went into the wilderness to submit to the Father. He wasn’t looking for a reward. He was there to worship. Because His vision was clear in spite of His lack of strength, He was true to the Father and chose not to worship the deceiver.

Sometimes, the only way we learn the lessons Father wants us to is through difficult experiences. Joseph Smith taught that Jesus “suffered temptations but gave no heed unto them.” (Doctrine & Covenants 20:22) He lived a perfect life, but He still suffered and learned grace to grace.

King Benjamin also prophesied of the suffering that Jesus would endure. He said that Jesus would subject Himself to the Father, and that He “suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people. … Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father. (Mosiah 15:5-8) This passage includes both definitions of the word “suffer.” Jesus suffered, and He allowed Himself to suffer, that He might gain victory over sin and death.

At a time in his life when it appeared that he could suffer no more, Joseph Smith prayed to the Father for himself and for his people, “O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place? How long shall thy hand be stayed…? let thine heart be softened, and thy bowels moved with compassion toward us.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:1-2, 4)

The Lord’s reply was merciful. “My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes. Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands. Thou art not yet as Job….” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:7-10) The Lord continues, “If thou art called to pass through tribulation;” and he lists a number of examples of suffering, “if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he? Therefore, hold on thy way… for God shall be with you forever and ever. (Doctrine & Covenants 122:5, 7-9)

Poor Joseph. In his darkest moment, he had not yet endured as Job. He had not suffered like the Lord of all. But he did have a reason to hope. God did not abandon Job, but blessed him with increase. The Lord “gave Job twice as much as he had before,” and “blessed the latter end of [his life] more than his beginning.” (Job 42:10, 12) God did not abandon His Only Begotten Son, either. After Jesus knelt in the Garden of Gethsemane, he prayed, “Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.” I love this example because Jesus prayed out of the honesty of His heart. He told Father what he wanted, but then clarified that He would submit to the Father’s will. He suffered. Then, “there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. And being in agony he prayed more earnestly: and he sweat as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.” (Luke 22:42-44, JST Luke 22:44)

The Lord told Joseph Smith, “I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent; But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I; Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit – and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink – Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men.” (Doctrine & Covenants 19:16-19)

Knowing that someone else knows what you are going through can be a great comfort. Knowing that Jesus has done something for us so that we wouldn’t have to is a tremendous gift! Knowing that even He had a hard time and didn’t want to do it makes His experience that much more personal to me. Believing that God does not lie and He does not change gives me hope that He will help me and save me in my desperation, too. Faith will get me started in the right direction, and hope will provide motivation when things get difficult. But, it is charity, the pure love of God, that will see me through to the end when my trials seem unbearable.

As I compare the many tears I shed in my own suffering with the blood that was shed in my behalf by the Savior, I am tempted to feel small and ashamed that I am so weak and vulnerable. The thing that saves me from greater self-pity and despair is that Jesus does not ask me to do what He did. I don’t have to suffer the way He did. I just need to live the way He wants me to, and that will be enough. I am not as strong as He is, but together we can do anything. I am not perfect like He is, but I am trying. I am not required to be perfect in my weakness. If I want to be like Jesus, I am required to turn to Him in faith when I am having a hard time. As I turn to him, then I can suffer the difficult lessons. I can allow Father to take the time He needs to make me better. I find I can do more and more through practice and prayer, as long as I have hope.

In the midst of that dark moment for Joseph Smith, the Lord gave him some instruction that was also meant to give him hope. And here we come back to the idea that I started with – charity. “Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distill upon thy soul as the dews from heaven. The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:45-46) This strength all starts with charity, which never faileth.

Whether it is charity that helps me in suffering, or that I gain more charity through the right kind of suffering, I don’t know for sure. But if I am willing to endure, and allow difficult lessons to shape who I am because I am seeking charity, at least I know that I am moving in the right direction. Little by little, and grace for grace, my heart becomes purer and I become a little more ready to meet my Savior. Each time that my suffering increases, I turn to Father in prayer. And, like Joseph, Melchizedek, and the Savior, Father will hear and answer our prayers. He will send angels to comfort us and buoy us up. I know Father will bless us with that which we seek if we pray for charity with all the energy of heart.


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Death is a Doorway

Standing
At the face of the reposed stone
Inscripted with names,
I rest
And remember
The mother I’ve never met.
I long
And yearn some more
For greeting phrases that await my arrival
In the next place,
A passage I have not yet read.

Waiting,
I reflect on my faithful friend
Who just now left,
So suddenly,
Passing through a door
In the ground –
A door admitting entrance
More readily
Than granting one return passage.
His place is further,
Another part in the book,
The next grand adventure.

Death,
A doorway not to be feared,
With plot largely unknown,
Is a path
From life to life
Between chapters of experience.
One school is finished,
Another begins,
But the life that passes through,
A common thread,
Is still the same,
Only more.
Death is merely a passage
To be written.

Mostly unseen,
One piece of my heart died,
Entering
The consuming furnace of unfamiliar trial
And test
As words I penned
Were etched in my heart by choice.
Repeatedly
My heart emerged again
And again,
Largely the same and unharmed.
Lesser parts purged,
The better made clearer.

The last time I passed away,
In the first place,
Or that which came before,
I left
Those who were familiar
And loved me.
In keeping my first estate,
I gave it up
And was given another.
Even now, I remember nothing
About that death.
Upon my leaving,
I was affectionately received
By family.

Did I lose or did I gain?
Which did it seem at first,
In that place?
Did I know
The expanse of loss
Makes room for more given?
Did I see
Losing the wrong is always better
And losing good
Temporary?
Did I know I would know
Someday?

Now I consider
The arrival of some future point
When my time here
Becomes
A passage in a book.
Will I fear that experience,
New and unfamiliar,
As though it is the first time?
Or will I be ready to turn another page
Just like the last?
If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.

Each time I die,
And offer one more part
That clings for existence,
The pattern of life is reread.
As long as I am willing,
The pathway seems to lead my heart and mind
Further up and further in.
If I remember, and feel,
I do not fear.
Verily,
It is written.

Books are inscripted,
Capturing the things we forget,
The memories
That escape our minds,
And the lessons
We thought we knew.
Death,
Is a doorway
Not to be feared,
But respected
With honest tears
In hope of the things we know
To wash away our fears.




“To die will be an awfully big adventure.” James M. Barrie, Peter Pan.

“One school is finished, and the time has come for another to begin.” Richard Bach, Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

“If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.” (Doctrine & Covenants 38:30)

“Come further up, come further in.” C. S. Lewis, The Last Battle.


http://saltypockets.blogspot.com/

Mirrors and Oneness

Seeing someone in a crowd that reminds you of a friend or an acquaintance is not that uncommon of an experience. Perhaps it is because we are always looking, hoping for some sort of connection. More often than not, we are drawn to people who are most like ourselves because it gives us something in common that we can relate to. It gives us a foundation on which we can build and make more connections.

A couple of decades ago, I had an experience that seemed a little odd and unexpected. The situation was unique in that the occurrence had not happened before and has not happened since. I was at Disneyland with my parents and we were navigating a crowd of people near New Orleans Square to get in line for the next ride. As I was walking, I saw a maintenance worker dressed in white walking with a broom and dustpan. I stopped for a moment, taken aback. As I watched him, I thought to myself, “He looks just like me!” It was almost like looking in a mirror, or as close to it as I had ever experienced with a stranger.

Seeing this man caused me to ask some additional questions. “Do I walk that way? Is that how I look to other people? I wonder what he is like.” His appearance wasn’t identical but it was close enough that it had a strong effect on me. The image is still clear in my mind.

When you see a person who bears a resemblance to someone who is familiar to you, the type of relationship you have determines the reaction. If I were a criminal who had just robbed a store, recognizing someone may not be a good thing. Instead of hope, I might have pangs of fear. But, if I were to see a close friend that I hadn’t seen for many years, I may wish to become reacquainted. Had I been the robber, I may have been relieved to find out the person was not the security officer I expected. Or, seeing the person I thought to be my friend, I might be disappointed that the resemblance was only that, and not the actual acquaintance. Still, the memory of that friend may warm my heart with gratitude, if only in remembrance. It may also give me reason to look a little more.

Generally, I believe we tend to find what we are looking for. There are exceptions to this rule as we happen upon something wonderful that is unlooked for. Call it serendipity or providence, I believe there is room for both and they are usually discernable. Yet, if we have faith in God, I believe we tend to look for the fruits of our faith. We expect good things to happen. If we are watching, we will recognize more of God’s influence in our lives, and we will have more to be grateful for. This is one case where believing is seeing.

Separate from appearances, there are other times when I happen to meet someone in the crowd of humanity that seems very familiar. In many ways our meeting is like looking in a mirror. We may not appear the same, have similar genetics, or even be the same gender, but there is something else, deeper than appearances, with a striking resemblance. Almost instantly, something resonates clearly and I am left to ponder why. I can’t say I have lots of answers, but I am very grateful for those connections. I have found those associations to be powerful and beautiful.

When you see a person who more than resembles someone you know, and is someone you know, the type of relationship you have with that person also determines the reaction. Quickly we make a judgment. “Is this someone I want to engage in conversation or avoid? Do I have pangs of fear, or do I want to become reacquainted? Is this relationship more meaningful or less meaningful?” I don’t believe there are right or wrong answers, but our answers reveal much about our hearts. It is easier to want to be with people with whom you feel you share something in common.

Since my heart is the truest indicator of who I am, it is my heart that I want to purify. I want to be my best self and not just a shadow of what I can be. I want to take out the trash rather than collect it. The air is much fresher to breathe and I am at ease when I am not surrounded by garbage that builds up over time. I can put many things in my heart – be it fear or faith, love or anger, pride or humility – but once those things are there, they are not easily removed. All matter has gravity, and while the gravity of the earth is strong, I believe gravity of the heart is stronger.

A mirror can be quite useful. It gives a reflection of who we are and what we are like, at least on the outside. Like our hearts, a mirror is very revealing. It shows our admirable qualities and our blemishes. It is not always easy to take the full package and say, “It is what it is.” True, I am what I am, but it is also true that I can change. Even a mirror will show that much over time.

Emotions we associate with our mirrors can also speak volumes about our hearts. Some may love to look in a mirror to admire their own qualities. Some may look in the mirror for hours to improve how they appear. Others may be afraid to look at their reflection because they know what they will see, wishing they were different. Some may not be satisfied with what they see and yet do not feel empowered to change. Some may choose to look at a mirror with indifference, believing there are more important things than self. They are neither enamored nor afraid. Occasionally it may happen that some will look in the mirror and just be grateful. I suspect there are days in which we all look at our hearts they way we look at mirrors with a variety of emotions and expressions. A mirror is a funny place for pulling faces.

The concept of self is an interesting paradox. It is helpful to know where you are to know where you are not. We need to acknowledge self enough to be aware, but not so much that we are distracted. If I have some sense of where my heart is by how my desires are reflected in my actions, I can determine where I need to change. But, if I focus on myself too much in the mirror, I will also miss the import of what needs to be cleaned up. The heart is an excellent place to examine the qualities and blemishes of our intent. This leads me to a probing question, “As a disciple of Jesus Christ, how can I use my heart and my mirror to help me lose self?” A mirror used to see myself is less useful than a mirror that is used to see the Savior.

The prophet Alma, after having taught about being spiritually reborn, offers a few important questions to consider. Speaking of the Lord he asked, “Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts? ... I say unto you, can ye look up to God at that day with a pure heart and clean hands? I say unto you, can you look up, having the image of God engraven upon your countenances?” (Alma 5:14, 19) In order to be a true disciple and be spiritually reborn, we must tie our actions to our faith. Our intent will be reflected in what we do. More importantly, this change of heart cannot be temporarily received, it must be engraved if we hope to keep it. Thus if we look in the mirror and begin to see the Savior, Jesus Christ, reflected in our hearts, our intent, and our actions, we can know that a mighty change is beginning to increase our faith. This is the start, or the birth, of our spiritual growth.

Just as spiritual rebirth begins in the heart, spiritual growth continues to flow from the heart. It is the heart that needs to be mirrored. Losing self can be best accomplished by reflecting the will of God in our own will. As we change our hearts and our desires to match His, we become one with God. Jesus prayed for this as He met with His apostles at the Last Supper. Speaking to the Father, He said, “And for their sakes I sanctify myself, that they also might be sanctified through the truth. Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.” (John 17:19-21)

Speaking of the prophet Enoch and his people, Moses said, “And the Lord called his people Zion, because they were of one heart and one mind, and dwelt in righteousness….” (Moses 7:18) If we wish to be among the Lord’s people, we need to bridle our desires and our passions and align them with the Lord’s will. When we learn to control the instruments for personal revelation – the mind and the heart – and direct them towards the Lord, then we grow spiritually. It is then that we become one with God.

The Lord revealed this same principle to Joseph Smith, speaking of our focus. He said, “And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things. Therefore, sanctify yourselves that your minds become single to God, and the days will come that you shall see him; for he will unveil his face unto you, and it shall be in his own time, and in his own way, and according to his own will.” (Doctrine & Covenants 88:67-68) If we will turn our eyes, and our hearts, so that they are single to God’s glory, he will fill our souls with light. As we are filled, the light will chase the darkness from us. The Holy Spirit will be able to sanctify our hearts just as Jesus prayed. When that mighty change is complete, when we see Him, we will be like Him, because His image will be graven in our countenances.

Paul also taught, “If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, … fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let … each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” (Philippians 2:1-4)

So much depends on love. Dieter F. Uchtdorf recently taught, “Love is what inspired our Heavenly Father to create our spirits; it is what led our Savior to the Garden of Gethsemane to make Himself a ransom for our sins. Love is the grand motive of the plan of salvation; it is the source of happiness, the ever-renewing spring of healing, the precious fountain of hope.

“As we extend our hands and hearts toward others in Christlike love, something wonderful happens to us. Our own spirits become healed, more refined, and stronger. We become happier, more peaceful, and more receptive to the whisperings of the Holy Spirit.” (You Are My Hands)

If we wish to become like Jesus, then we must be willing to love like Jesus. We can lose “self” by loving people as our “self”. Then my purpose for looking in the mirror is not to see how becoming I am, but to see how I am becoming like the Savior Jesus Christ.

More often than not, we are drawn to people who are most like ourselves because it gives us something in common that we can relate to. As we draw near to the Savior, we have much more in common with those who are not like us because we begin to feel His love for them. It’s His love that we share in common. Then, as we look in the mirror, hopefully we see less of our own selves and more of His image.


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Lose Your Self, Not Your Perspective

There is often a difference between “being right” and “being righteous.” Wanting to be right isn’t a bad thing. This desire can stem from a desire to do good, to be obedient, and to be sure that the path we are on will take us to the right destination. It suggests that we are not only seeking good, but that we have found it, or at least some part that is worth holding on to. It may also be evidence that our faith has resulted in a knowledge of good and evil.

Our actions after we have found something good are what determine our own goodness. It is then that we find whether we match the goodness we have discovered, or if we merely admire something that is better than ourselves. I often sorrow for my own weaknesses when I have discovered the latter. Yet if I didn’t recognize this truth, I could never get past “being right” to “become" righteous.

I believe the desire for security to be innate in all of us. We want to be happy. We want to be successful, and we want the happiness we have found to continue. In order to do so, it is natural to guard what we have and what we know. We settle. We are willing to accept the little bit of success we have gained at the risk of forgetting there is much more. So, here lies the heart of the problem, and the difference between being right and being righteous. I have to be willing to ask myself a difficult question. “Am I protecting myself, my success, and my possessions, or am I protecting my ability to gain more truth?” My answer to this question should clearly define where I feel safe and show where my insecurities are.

Settling for a lesser truth can be very risky. Consider a difficult court case where a defendant is being tried for a serious offense. It is difficult to know whether the person is innocent, guilty, or merely negligent without proper evidence. If a verdict is determined too quickly based on a single piece of evidence, the judgment may not be fair. We may want to find a person either guilty or innocent, hoping for black and white clarity, when in fact the person may be some of each. I find that my imperfections put me in this camp more often than I would like. Just because I am trying to do what is right doesn’t mean I am completely right. Understanding this valuable truth will help me to turn to a more complete source. Personalizing this trial of faith will help me to understand that I have to defend truth without being personally defensive. If my own interests get in the way of the truth I am seeking, I become blinded and I stop seeing clearly.

In the coasts of Caesarea Philippi during his Galilean ministry, Jesus asked his disciples, “Whom say ye that I am?” Peter answered, “Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God. Jesus then told Peter he was blessed because he had received this witness from the Father. Immediately after, Jesus began to teach those who were with him of the things he had to do as the Christ and Savior of the World. He told them how he would suffer and be killed. Peter quickly began to rebuke him, telling Jesus that this wouldn’t happen. Jesus’ response to Peter is a little disturbing. “Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.” (Matthew 16:15-16, 22-23)

I feel for Peter. What a difficult thing to have just had a spiritual experience – to have born witness by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, to be told that the Church would be built upon the principles of revelation and priesthood keys, and that Peter himself would be given these as well as the sealing power to perform God’s work – and then to be told that you are Satan because you care not for the things that are God’s. I think if I had been in Peter’s shoes, I might have been a little confused and frightened. It would be easy to take the accusation personally without some degree of faith that Jesus was merely preparing Peter for something greater. Shortly after, Peter was given those keys as Moses, Elias, Elijah, and John the Baptist appeared to him on the mount of transfiguration. He continued to grow from grace to grace though he was not perfect. He learned how to see larger perspective through God’s eyes. He learned how to be trusted.

The struggle with self is perhaps the most difficult battle we will ever face. So much happens in the heart that goes unseen. Each of us places things that we treasure in our hearts. We make rooms for people who are important to us. We choose what we will think and how we will act by what we allow into our hearts. If we are selfish and self focused, we will savor the things of men rather than God. Yet if we enlarge our perspective so that our focus is on truth instead of our desires only, then self gets swallowed up in something greater. We become greater. Our outward beauty becomes a reflection of the change that takes place in our hearts. It demonstrates whether or not we have taken the Lord’s image into our own countenances.

Being swallowed up may sound like a negative thing, but this should not be compared to a hostile corporate takeover. Jesus invites us to come unto Him, so that we can follow Him and be with Him, He offers us a grand gift, to be a joint-heir of all that the Father has. He asks us to do what He has done. Offering ourselves up to be swallowed up in the will of the Lord is much like Jonah recognizing his mistakes, offering to be thrown off the ship only to be swallowed by the whale, and then be delivered safely. Had Jonah accepted this principle sooner, he could have swallowed his pride and been blessed instead of having to endure the stomach of a whale. Consider the sign of Jonah. (Matthew 16:4)

The prophet Abinadi foretold the difficult things Jesus would do during his ministry. Interestingly enough, it is the same thing that Jesus foretold to Peter. To King Noah he said, “And thus the flesh becoming subject to the Spirit, or the Son to the Father, being one God, suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people. … Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father.” (Mosiah 15:5-7) By yielding to the Holy Spirit and submitting our desires for sanctification and approval, we allow our will to be swallowed up in the will of the Father.

After Jesus chastened Peter, He taught him how to keep a clear perspective. He said, “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24) His disciples hadn’t seen him carry his own cross yet, but would according to his word. We may assume that they had seen others crucified along the roads of Jerusalem who had born their own cross before receiving their final sentence of death. In this symbolic act, if we take up our own cross, we may do something difficult that acknowledges the death of the natural man so that we can more properly follow the Savior. Jesus continues, “And now for a man to take up his cross, is to deny himself of all ungodliness, and every worldly lust, and keep my commandments.” (JST Matthew 16:26)

Jesus spake of His Cross and His deliverance as things that had already happened. He was obedient to the Father at every step. He also taught how we could follow him without having to make the same sacrifice, if we would just be willing to do so and then do whatever else He asks of us. The account of this story is recorded slightly different in three of the four gospels of the New Testament. Each one adds some insight to keeping a proper perspective.

In Matthew we read, “Break not my commandments for to save your lives; for whosoever will save his life in this world, shall lose it in the world to come.” (JST Matthew 16:27) Less dire than saving our lives is an attempt to save a mortgage, pay a bill, or provide for our wants and needs by breaking the sabbath or withholding our tithes and offerings from the Lord. If we are tempted to break a commandment to provide for a want, will we not be judged more harshly than if we were trying to save our lives? Still, the instruction remains not to break the commandments to save our lives. Rather than judging others for their decisions, I feel we are better off judging our own intent to see if we are trying to be right or trying to be righteous. If we are unsure, the Lord will help us to know if we ask in faith.

“For whosoever will save his life in this world, shall lose it in the world to come. And whosoever will lose his life in this world, for my sake shall find it in the world to come. Therefore, forsake the world, and save your souls….” (JST Matthew 16:27-29) Jesus’ words here have everything to do with priority. Do I give too much voice to my current needs that I forget about the tomorrow of eternity? Am I so focused on self that I lose my perspective? What am I willing to offer to make sure this does not happen? I find when I am not only willing to ask these questions, but answer them with positive action and choices, my perspective enlarges and I feel closer to the Holy Spirit.

In Mark we read, “For whosoever will save his life, shall lose it; or whosever will save his life, shall be willing to lay it down for my sake; and if he is not willing to lay it down for my sake, he shall lose it.” (JST Mark 8:37) This account reinforces that our willingness is most important. We may not have to give up everything. In fact, it is Father who wishes to give us everything, but He can only do it if our hearts are set upon Him instead of the things He wishes to give us. We have to be willing to endure and not settle for anything less than Him.

“In Luke we read, “For whosoever will save his life, must be willing to lose it for my sake; and whosoever will be willing to lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it. For what doth it profit a man if he gain the whole world, and yet he receive him not whom God hath ordained, and he lose his own soul, and he himself be a castaway?” (JST Luke 9:24-25) Jesus enlarges this understanding beyond the will of the Father to include the words of those servants who have been called to teach us and chasten us. He does not ask that we give our lives in death, but to give our lives in service as we follow the Lord’s anointed. “Therefore deny yourselves of these, and be not ashamed of me.” (JST Mark 8:40)

On another occasion, Jesus taught this same principle and said, “Remember Lot’s wife. Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.” (Luke 17:32-33) He then continued to tell them of some of the signs of the second coming, how there would be two and one would be taken and one left behind. If we wish to have oil in our lamps when the bridegroom returns for the wedding, we should be willing to put self aside and purify our hearts.

Jesus Christ has shown the way to eternal life with the Father. He has taught us the truth and has paid the price for our sins. As we partake the emblems of His atoning sacrifice, and swallow them to become part of us, we demonstrate a willingness to let him into our core, into our heart. By so doing we swallow our pride and offer up our hearts and our desires to Him. This offering is not so that we will give up, suppress, or deny those God given desires, appetites, and passions, but to allow him to purge “self” from them, making them more pure and more powerful. This sanctification of our hearts removes selfishness and makes room for Him whose love is as broad as the universe.

The hardest decisions I will ever make will take place in my heart. I tend to have more fear when I can only see the instant of now and what I have to give up. When I understand the larger picture, my judgment is clearer and I am more likely to swallow and offer willingly. Recognizing that God is the only complete source for truth and happiness helps me to turn my focus from self and keep it on Him.


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